The week commenced with a rather painful $2,000 loss. I can take bad beats and cold decks, but when half the deficit is due to bad play, it really pisses me off. True, it wasn’t going my way, but I was playing shoddy poker, predominantly due to a lack of patience and the failure to identify the claw-back (which I have previously discovered leads to a big next session hit) that occurred the day before when I recovered from a $1,800 deficit.
Although I have learned to eliminate tilt from my game, I still suffer from adverse mood swings. If I’m winning, I’m over the moon, but if I’m losing, my shoulders slump and I allow the demoralising nature of poker to affect the way I feel in my every day life – it’s something that I have never been able to solve.
But, having said that, whatever the loss is, I always return to my normal self within a day, normally after a good night’s sleep, and am back at the tables within seconds.
What has really got me down this week though is not my losses endured at the felt, but other issues that I can’t really go into. Working for blonde isn’t always fun and games, and a few issues have made this a very stressful and trying week indeed.
The Vic in particular was one of the toughest live updates I’ve encountered. With 400 players, blonde’s busiest day in 18 months, a tentative wifi connection, tight and cramped conditions, a playing area that was segregated into 3 separate sections, and a pressroom that was miles away from the tables, I had to work harder than ever, not easy when you’re called in last minute after just a few hours of sleep.
However, this predicament was unavoidable and the Vic did whatever they could to make things easier, plus I was accompanied by two top-notch updaters in Chili and NoFlopsHomer, but, overall, I just began to feel the pressure a little more than usual and the joys of updating suddenly disappeared.
So I can take a much needed rest and come back rejuvenated, I’ve decided to play the whole week of the Gutshot’s London Poker Masters instead of heading off to Baden for the third EPT Event of the tour – that job is going to Jen (who kindly gave me the time off) and her highly esteemed partner, Flopsy.
I think I need this break though as I am in danger of being ungrateful for the wonderful position I am. I keep trying to remind myself of how lucky I am, and I’m determined to make sure that I don’t forget that. However, I still want updating to be fun, so I think playing the Gutshot instead of working is a sensible move.
It’s a cracking line up too, starting with a £200 2-day event and climaxing with the £500 No Limit Hold’Em Main Event. I plan to play them all, including the £200 Omaha Freezeout (my first venture into live Omaha tournament play), and it’s going to cost me £1,050 in total – not pennies, but I can afford it and I’m keen to give it a shot.
It should be interesting to see how I fair, I haven’t found a live win in a long time, and although that’s mainly due to not playing, I believe it’s also a result of my current mental state and my obsession with online ring games.
So, to avoid making that one vital mistake and to ensure that I don’t go into battle with a cash game mindset, I’ll be eating three healthy meals per day and relinquishing the online tables by Sunday. I may play the odd multi to practice, but I want to be fresh going into the week so I can give myself as good a chance as possible of making it a lucrative week.
I shall be logging my progress on my blog, so keep an eye out. Hopefully I’ll be in higher spirits…