same situation in both formats.................they are taking yours and others cash with no chance of the participants recovering their money

Dear Sir/madam/automated telephone answering service
 
Having spent the past twenty minutes waiting for someone at Leith police station to pick up a telephone I have decided to abandon the idea and try e-mailing you instead. Perhaps you would be so kind as to pass this message on to your colleagues in Leith by means of smoke signal, carrier pigeon or ouji board.
 
As I'm writing this e-mail there are eleven failed medical experiments (I think you call them youths) in West Cromwell Street which is just off Commercial Street in Leith . Six of them seem happy enough to play a game which involves kicking a football against an iron gate with the force of a meteorite. This causes an earth shattering CLANG! which rings throughout the entire building. This game is now in it's third week and as I am unsure how the scoring sytem works, I have no idea if it will end any time soon.
 
The remaining five walking zombies are happily rummaging through several bags of rubbish and items of furniture that someone has so thoughtfully dumped beside the wheelie bins. One of them has found a saw and is setting about a discarded chair like a beaver on speed. I fear that it's only a matter of time before they turn their limited attention to the bottle of calor gas that is lying on it's side between the two bins. If they could be relied on to only blow their own arms and legs off then I would happily leave them to it. I would even go so far as to lend them the matches. Unfortunately they are far more likely to blow up half the street with them and I've just finished decorating the kitchen.
 
What I suggest is this. after replying to this e-mail with worthless assurances that the matter is being looked into and will be dealt with, why not leave it until the one night of the year (probably bath night) when there are no mutants around then drive up the street in a panda car before doing a three point turn and disappearing again. This will of course serve no purpose other than to remind us what policemen actually look like.
 
I trust that when I take a clawhammer to the skull of one of these throwbacks you'll do me the same courtesy of giving me a four month head start before coming to arrest me.
 
I remain sir, your obedient servant

 
Mr ,
 
I have read your e-mail and understand your  frustration at the problems caused by youths  playing in the area and the problems you have encountered in trying to contact the police.
 
As the Community Beat Officer for your street I would like to extend an offer of discussing the matter fully with you.
 
Should you wish to discuss the matter, please provide contact details (address / telephone number) and when may be suitable.
 
Regards
 
PC
?
Community Beat Officer
 
 
 
 
Dear PC ??
 
First of all I would like to thank you for the speedy response to my original e-mail. 16 hours and 38 minutes must be a personal record for Leith Police station and rest assured that I will forward these details to Norris McWhirter for inclusion in his next book.
 
Secondly I was delighted to hear that our street has it's own community beat officer. May I be the first to congratulate you on your covert skills. In the five or so years I have lived in West Cromwell Street , I have never seen you. Do you hide up a tree or have you gone deep undercover and infiltrated the gang itself? Are you the one with the acne and the moustache on his forehead or the one with a chin like a wash hand basin? It's surely only a matter of time before you are headhunted by MI5.
 
Whilst I realise that there may be far more serious crimes taking place in Leith such as smoking in a public place or being Muslim without due care and attention, is it too much to ask for a policeman to explain (using words of no more than two syllables at a time) to these twats that they might want to play their strange football game elsewhere. The pitch behind the Citadel or the one at DKs are both within spitting distance as is the bottom of the Albert Dock.
 
Should you wish to discuss these matters further you should feel free to contact me on ?. If after 25 minutes I have still failed to answer, I'll buy you a large one in the Compass Bar.
 
Regards
?
 
P.S If you think that this is sarcasm, think yourself lucky that you don't work for the cleansing department.

 

By the way Daniel

I like the nude bird spinning.....................who is it..........anybody we know from blonde?

Happens all the time on Sky poker.

Someone sits down with £100, then doubles or trebles, leaves the table and returns with £100 until the next time he leaves. If this happens at the table I am playing I usually leave, make a note against the players name and try not to sit with the culprit again.

I think it is totally "bad form"

Must admit I found Marty and his staff excellent during my time at Maidstone. Everything was done very professionally. With regards the Norwegian, totally out of order with the first comment, talking during the pot for the second offence( so what) having listened to Jamie Gold during WSOP 2006, he said absolutely nothing wrong. Third offence could have been waived, but putting all three together and the bleatings of Texas and the Mad Monk, who I must say treats everyone at the table like school children with him being the teacher, I don't think Marty had any other option.

There was a a blonde at bB5  - Gatso - who drove from The Ukraine to Cardiff bB5!

even better, he seems to have no idea at all what he does in Ukraine!!

He mentioned that he is something to do with farming rape seed or maize oil which is supposedly our next petrol/diesel for the car. understand that there is heavy investment from the oil companies at present, someting that tikay could invest all his capital in.

Gatso apologies for dumping you out wit 77 vs QQ

[[b]money you won away from you. WH etc could spend time to verify accounts and ccs before letting anyone play[/b]

Again depends on what has happened to the money. I am assuming it has been returned to the card holder that had the money stolen off them.

The cardholders money is never at risk - he will be refunded by the cc company.  You guys appear to to be missing a big issue here.  We all take on players at the table and put OUR MONEY at risk.  If you are play honestly and win, there is no way that anyone is entitled to take [b]money you won away from you.  WH etc could spend time to verify accounts and ccs before letting anyone play[/b].  They choose not to do that because they think they make more money by not doing it.  That is their risk not ours and they have effectively decided that players will take that risk to increase their profits. 

Couldnt agree more.

They have the software to verify account holders........passwords, they have the software to verify credit cards...........pin numbers, so when we sit at a table to gamble our funds, we should not be in a position to loose, because they have not screened the ooposition at the tables.

IMO that no sites should take monies from anyones account without discussing it with them first

280th, thats when a play on AK takes you out.Big slick is the worst hand on Sky, looses nearly everytime!!

Yes, wel done Kev, great result. Unlucky Mel, I thought you were the favourite, especially afetr taking down the Friday night comp.

Although your jack, jack, jack.................ooops sorry was def funny.

Great to meet you all again see you all again later

why dont you all live together and make a chennel 4 documentry out of it

More likely to be some sort of situation comedy.........hmmm Kev and comedy. Next I'll be thinking Terry and June were funny

You want comedy mate ..... take a look in your wardrobe !!!

I reckon one of those "fly on the wall" documentaries is called for.......anyone think of a good name?

Sounds like a brilliant weekend, sorry I missed it. It's only about 18 months ago that they ran a 390 runner event at the City West Hotel, and that was promoted as tha largest outside of America, bloody hell has that been beaten.

BTW what was the buy-in?

I'm in, just checked on the apat site. Chuffed because it's my local cardroom and missed out on the sweepstake last year.

[but Mel was still in, well stacked]

Went to The Vic, and like Silo, enjoyed the day overall. Went out in 18th....but Mel was still in, well stacked
As he said, only 2 out of 6 starting tables had dealers....the reason given by the Manager was short notice and that having this event sandwiched between the EPT and the upcoming GUKPT meant he couldn't rota on dealers.

Completely agree it needs a 150/300 level. We seem to go from playing Poker to a bit of an all in fest.

Never saw or heard about any Buffet...but maybe I went out too early!

Everyone was really friendly, and it was played in a nice atmosphere.....apart from one guy who thought it was a WSOP final table!!, and threw a complete strop by throwing his chips everywhere and storming off,.... when his Queens lost to Mel's Ace King....LOL

lol yeah that was a double of Phil Hellmuth  

48 runners at the Vic, to add to the no buffet (apparently all sandwiches and soft drinks are free), all self dealt until about 1.5 hours into the game when they moved a table to a dealer table .  Last 2 tables were dealer dealt though which kept it the same speed so was good

One thing I encountered was that a friend of mine, who writes for my magazine (out november, selfless promotion) was refused entry by Joe the cardroom manager, who told him that he couldn't play as he was a pro, however he couldn't understand that he writes articles for poker magazines.  He had also brought his girlfriend to play the event with him.  Thought that Des might like to use that information as poker is not his sole living as he runs a company.

I was impressed I won a seat though   finished 3rd took a bad beat but hey its poker

Mel - this is on the APAT web site - not sure if its relevant?  It may be seen that poker and running a poker mag are like section b?


For the avoidance of doubt, Membership of the Amateur Poker Association & Tour is not available to any individual who earns his or her SOLE income as a result of a) playing poker or b) utilising their poker expertise to supplement their poker income away from the table, for example, a professional poker player who also earns a fee as a TV poker analyst.

Tracey

never questioned

but, and it's a big but.................when you sit at a larger stakes table and WIN.It's very easy to sit down again at a later date and have a reversal of fortune. Thats when bankroll management goes out of the window, and your mind remembers the time when your bankroll increased significantly in a short amount of time.

Beware of the demon on your shoulder that encorages the "sit down"

30 at walsall, therefore only 3 seats up for grabs.

They were charging £3 for the buffet at 6 0'clock,best guess there would only be the final table by that time.

Thought the structure was OK, but they could have easily given 5,000 chips to start play with!!!

Given the same set of circumstances I dont think I would do the 75 mile round trip again.