blonde poker forum

Watching a programme at the moment on BBC4 about Espanola Island.

They shifted all the goats offa there as they were munching all the tortoise's leaves.

Why take sides in these things? If (as I suspect) the tortoise is a stupid species that should have been extinct years ago to make way for faster animals, why do we stick up for the tortoise? Moreover, what the hey do we have against goats?

Gazelles, wildebeast and the like run like buggery when they are in danger of being munched. Some things like deers stand and wave their wall decorations by way of defence in macho fights. The tortoise goes into a wee shell ffs!!! Does anyone else think this is just plain cheating.

The drawback of dragging around their own "dell" all day long is that it takes them longer than billy goaties to get to their dinner. Well surely that's just the way it goes.

Have tortoises ever done anything productive, except kicking the arse of ficticious hares in un-natural races. Slow and steady wins the race? My arse, I've seen Steve Cram on the other side, running like buggery seems to be the way to go.

Well this rant was  brought curtesty of way-out-of-left-field.com !

handbags

And the gladrags

wrong thread

Tortoises have no points. You're thinking of hedgehogs!

No, Hedgehogs are round and blue, especially frozen ones.

Is there anywhere better to place your fantastic first Benson of the day then into then an old Tortoise shell ?

Gods proof we should smoke IMO  ;)

What's the difference between a hedgehog and a police car?

One has wheels the other does not.

Come on make them a little tougher.

What's green and has wheels?

a wheelie bin

all creatures are worthy of survival and breathing space. the fact that the tortoise has been around for so long is a great thing in itself. they are wonderful creatures and eat lettuce out of your hands. they have strong jaws and can eat fast even if they dont move around fast. their shell is their armory and maybe thats how they have survived so long?

long live the tortoise ;tk;

Tanks plays poker like the tortoise

Your Tortoise should have its name written in white paint (day-glo if you've got a fancy one) on its shell, be placed in a box during winter with carrots & corned beef,... & shipped to the Galapagos Islands in summer for the tourists to admire, ....Blue Peter knew what they were talking about  :D

We all have our own shells to retreat into when faced with adversity.
We have all stuck our necks out at one time or another.
On certain occasions, we have all slowly taken one step at a time.
This is what the tortoise has shown us.

Where would be be without the tortoise (and turtle)?

Well, we'd be thinking up new phrases for one. Where would we be without that old chestnut "Hurry up in there" "I won't be long dear" "But I've got the turtles head".

 :goodpost:

The very point of tortoises is that they are slow, at least I'm faster than something :D

Ahhh the Saturday afternoon entertainment for Bb4 sorted.

I back the one with the shell - all you have to do is make the race away from the bar.

Its always something with these goats these days, thats why the worlds going down hill.

I cant donate to a charity, open a gameshow box, or turn on the t.v without having to put up with a goat, Its not reality t.v thats causing the decline social decency, its quite obviously goats.

My point exactly bolt.

I saw this program earlier, must've been a repeat... the point in tortoises is that they're cute :)

even if they do have a face like an old man!

It's just that as a species, we seem to be wannabe master players in the evolution, circle of life, whole lion kingy whatever it is nature thing the planet has going on.

Tortoises have been around for a while, but then so had dinosaurs. Their time came, maybe it's time to say cheerio to the giant tortoise.

If stegasauros rex was still alive today, on some remote island, would we do our level best to artificially manufacture conditions in which they could thrive? I've seen those films, they don't end good. Well that's exactly what we seem to be doing with the tortoise.

They don't seem to be too keen to reproduce either. Half the programme was about how difficult it was to get daddy tortoise to make nasty with mummy tortoise. Maybe on some level these wisened beasts know their time in the grand scheme of things is coming to an end. Oooh, don't get me started on the flippin' pandas.

What if, best case lefty scenario, they do multiply in numbers exponentially. Who's to say they won't call an annual general giant tortoise meeting and decide to nip out of their shells just to see what happens. We've removed all the nasty things they might trip over, and so even without their protective cheat blankets, their numbers continue to rise. Mummy and daddy doin' the tortoise becomes even easier without that shell thing in the way, and the population boom really kicks off.

A bunch of them feel too crowded, and hitch a ride on Air Galapogas Flight #27X. Before long, giant shell-less tortoises  are sprinting throughout London beating up little kids just for something to do.

When this day comes, we'll have made our own beds.

You always manage to make me giggle!

Thank you for highlighting an important issue for us: the possible invasion of shell-less tortoises in London, beware guys :)

You don't make the rules, the online poker sites do. They clearly lay them out in their terms and conditions.

You tell him bus!

Teenage Mutant Ninja Tortoises! Heros without a shell, tortoise power!

rotflmfao

Perhaps the day will come when we really need them.

I used to have a tortoise called Speedy One Eye.  He was great, can't remember what happened to him though.

Anyone know where you can buy tortoise from? - I know you can only buy ones that have been bred in captivity as importing them is illegal now.

I'd love another one.

If tortoises weren't around, would pies ever have been invented ?

Perhaps the day will come when we really need Howard Hughes's milk bottles.

Too bad we flushed them.

How much of your life did you waste writing that then????? ;sleep;

And the moral of the story..........?

CHILDREN - DONT DO DRUGS !!!

I'll take that as a compliment then :D

It was so nice of you to make this point. I once found a hedghog and nurtured it with bread and milk. I couldn't decide whether I should keep it so i tossed a coin.

It came up tails so i had to let it go. I had a great day with "spikey" that the coin toss couldn't mar. I only hope that all of us.... well, u, i give back what we get from guys like spikey.

I was only 8, bit young to appreciate what i had. If i'd been 16, bit older I might've appreciated what I'd had, let my feelings out and not played games. Character's hidden, with insight all is clear.

I hope my message is obvious jane.

That isn't a waste! :o Warning us of things to come is time well spent. Even if it is just in poor old Thomas' imagination!

Your not the one who has to sit and listent to this when hes at home!

Its not just a random thing, this is the kind of stuff he comes out with all the time......

Hmmmm, is it... you have gotten better at coin flips as you got older? or that if you don't want a frozen hedgehog, don't let a 8yr old flip a coin on it's fate!

Lucky for the Hedgehog - bread and milk is bad for them  ;tk;

Cat Food and Water.

Bread and Milk can kill them!

(http://groups.msn.com/_Secure/0WQDzAgId0FtHPhtiNXSWRM3vQfXj8BxWXYMvFdK6BOU3PwSgTqZgtfFJ49cSzzqgh6XAKwr6quSc7XAdECvNvZpolQKzVD5PuO7WeYeYh*6uq3ksX0YrA37X96wsx2xUeBgUmnIMgz8/smilie_schildkroete.gif?dc=4675461053494472475)

This post was bugging me yesterday as it just isn't the way the Cat writes, so after getting really paranoid, I got him to confirm that there was indeed something hidden in the post.

Annoyingly I had a pretty manic day yesterday and didn't have time to get back onto blonde to have another look at it, but this morning I solved his little puzzle.

Can anyone else?