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Poker Forums => The Rail => Topic started by: thetank on October 13, 2006, 06:37:14 PM



Title: Buisness idea.
Post by: thetank on October 13, 2006, 06:37:14 PM
Pesky philips fridge freezers have dried up that gravy train that was flogging ice. If online poker dies on it's arse, we need new avenues of revenue generation, moolah making.

To that end, I'm setting up a buisness, see all this mining wot-not they carry on with in places like South Africa and Wales etc, they've been going about it all wrong.

They build big vertical shafts deep into the earth. At some point they start expanding this shaft into tunnels along a horizontal plane. As they get deeper, they encounter all sorts of problems.

The rock above them collapses in the tunnels, seismic activity underground, extreme  temperatures and humidity, ventilation problems etc etc. Even the most sophisticated deep mines who've never had a major incident can't avoid the odd fatality.

Billions of monetary units (  :dontask: ) are spent on attempts to negate these problems, and drive mines deeper and deeper.

My question is, why not spend those billions on more dynamite.

See the way they built that big vertical shaft, just do it again next to it, and again, and again. Instead of messing around with tunnels and all the s***e that goes with them, just make a big f*** off hole in the ground.

Ventilation issues? No problem any more, look above you, that's the f***ing sky. The rocks falling on your head? All we need to worry about now is hailstones.

Countless fortunes on precision engineering and the advent of new technologies to better survive underground? What a load of bollox. We'll have an explosives budget and that's it.

Say no to unnatural dodgy tunnels, and yes to big f*** off holes in the ground.

Gone will be the image of a miner with blacked out faces who travel to work in a dodgy deathtrap of a lift. My guys can ski to work if they want to, or perhaps via some sort of flume, and they certainly won't need to touch up their make-up come knocking off time.

Anyone wishing to invest in thetank mining f***ing digging corporation. (Or TT M FDC) please PM me.



Before anyone asks, no I have not been rakking the ganja today.


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: TightEnd on October 13, 2006, 06:40:40 PM
the tank will be applying for membership of the Green party tomorrow


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: lazaroonie on October 13, 2006, 06:41:39 PM
"stick" me down for a fiver...

 rotflmfao rotflmfao rotflmfao


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: thetank on October 13, 2006, 06:44:15 PM
I've anticipated the enviromental lobby.

We'll build hills with all the rock we dig out that ain't gold or coal.

Then build a membrane on top of it, put down some soil, and plant some grass (or other pretty s***) and those tree huggers will be delighted. Another munro to bag.


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: Wardonkey on October 13, 2006, 06:46:03 PM
Tank,

I think you should smoke some ganja...


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: TightEnd on October 13, 2006, 06:46:56 PM
light it with your dynamite stick....


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: MrMoves on October 13, 2006, 06:48:46 PM
I'd like to invest in miningbuisness.com please

Can't be any worse than Party.


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: thetank on October 13, 2006, 06:50:32 PM
There's also a huge oppurtunty for a sister company.

Neither dynamite nor nitroglycerin presently has any sponsored matches on google.


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: mikkyT on October 13, 2006, 06:51:57 PM
Ok tank.... patent this new mining innovation and then appear on next years Dragons Den for funding!


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: Wardonkey on October 13, 2006, 06:53:21 PM
You could build a ski resort on the mountain of displaced material....


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: Wardonkey on October 13, 2006, 06:55:02 PM
But you'd have to careful that excessive use of dynamite in the area didn't cause avalanches.


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: thetank on October 13, 2006, 06:59:58 PM
Avalanches, schmavalances.

Mondays is set the dynamite day, Tuesday is the blowing s*** up day. Everyone is wearing ear protectors and going hill-walking, well out of harms way so the land can slide all it wants. Wednesdays, Thursdays and Fridays are putting rocks onto the truck days.
When we have a particulary large avalanche on the Tuesday, overtime will be available at the weekend.

Science is killing the world, the less of it the better. We're only going to employ one geological expert, he tells us where to start digging. On Day 2 he gets fired.


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: thetank on October 13, 2006, 07:13:59 PM

Ok tank.... patent this new mining innovation and then appear on next years Dragons Den for funding!


Naturally, but I thought it only fair to give the Blondites first crack at the whip before the "investors" on that show get a chance.


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: dik9 on October 13, 2006, 07:14:10 PM
So that's what North Korea were doing ;tk;

You told their government ya plans Tank?


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: thetank on October 13, 2006, 07:16:31 PM
I'm on it.

Can't remeber if they're on the filofax under N or K.


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: mikkyT on October 13, 2006, 07:32:10 PM
R

for ronrey


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: thetank on October 13, 2006, 07:35:57 PM
Got the busy tone with North Korea. (It was under C, secretary spelt Korea wrong)
Will have to get back to you there Dik9.

In other news, calling it a mining company is right out, and I'm not too keen on calling it digging.

thetank's rock harvesting corporation is the new name.


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: ericstoner on October 13, 2006, 08:14:44 PM
Can you send down some of what your on please 8)


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: tigscoco on October 14, 2006, 07:33:22 PM
Oh dear, new surroundings must be taking effect!

I go to work and he is fine, then I come back and he wants to dig a big big hole! 

Dude, if it rains your gona end up with a big huge massive puddle, what you gona do then?


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: bhoywonder on October 14, 2006, 07:41:33 PM
he is in glasgow

rain isnt a problem trust me


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: moritzey on October 14, 2006, 08:55:58 PM
I've just put some dead money into online poker shares. Can I give you some, too?


Title: Re: Buisness idea.
Post by: tigscoco on October 14, 2006, 09:21:17 PM
he is in glasgow

rain isnt a problem trust me

He's in Denny now, and I think thats whats done it!  Good renervation idea though! LOL

This place could do with a make-over!