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The little girl in Portugal.

What where her parants thinking of leaving a 3 year old little girl alone 

regards

M

It is very sad, but I don't think it's fair to blame the parents.  From what I heard on the radio today, the complex they were staying at was one where they offered some kind of 'baby listening' service.  The parents were having a meal in the hotel and checking in on their daughter themselves every half hour too.

I concur.

It is a reallly unusual event, but me personally, no way I could just leave a young relative of mine like this, probably for irrational reasons. What's your main fear...fire? They would spot that.
So so weird, this wasn't opportunistic, went to lengths to break in. Probably someone that saw them around, I fear the worst :( :(
so weird for the algarve too.....
very sorry for them. total nightmare.
relatives said the local police were crap, didn't want to draw bad publicity. could well believe that, sounds more like the french/italian police though

imo the children are too young to be left alone

But again what this implies is that the parents cant be held responsible as the abducter was probably a person who held a position of trust in the resort.

parents must have been lured into a false sense of security by staff

easy for us to criticise


lets hope and pray it turns out well

Dito, what bhoywonder says.

Held accountable how?!  I think they're probably suffering enough.

agreed.

http://www.nspcc.org.uk/HelpAndAdvice/WhatChildAbuse/Neglect/neglect_wda36377.html

There is no UK law stating the age at which a child can be left at home alone. However, parents can be prosecuted for wilful neglect if they leave a child alone or unsupervised "in a manner likely to cause unnecessary suffering or injury to health" (Children and Young Persons Act 1933). Your neighbour may be having difficulties finding childcare. Perhaps the family is isolated and lacks the support of relatives and friends? As a neighbour, could you offer help with contacting local support services or with childcare? See People to talk to for organisations that offer childcare advice.

Babies should never be left alone, even for a short time. If you notice that a baby or a child under the age of nine has been left on their own, contact the police on 999. They will go to the house to make sure that the child is safe from harm.

Before leaving an older child alone, parents must take into account the child's age and maturity, their ability to cope in an emergency and how they feel about being left alone. Most children under the age of 13 are not mature enough to cope in an emergency and should not be left alone for more than a short time.

We recommend that children under the age of 16 should not be left alone overnight.

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Read a story recently about a 4 year old child that was left alone in a locked flat for a few weeks, made do with ketchup/biscuit snacks and survived. Mind boggles....

Please dont quote anything i say on serious threads, it leads to a whole world of hurt for me!!!!!

Fearis I guess you do not have children.

So I forgive you

Regards

M

I wouldn't care what assurances someone gave me, kids safety is parent's direct responsibility. Couldn't sit having a drink and enjoy myself if they were left alone. Personally, I think it's neglect, they may get a visit from Social Services to ensure the other kids aren't being left. Terrible time for the parents, but the children's welfare comes first. One 3 year old and two 2 year olds left on their tod =child neglect.

This was very sad to hear about.  I don't have Kids or know anything about caring for Kids, but I thought it was unusual to leave a Kid of 3 yrs and another two Kids who were under 3 on their own.  If I have Kids at some point, I would hope I would never consider  leaving them even if an emergency came up .  I hope she is ok

 i would never leave them alone or with anybody else for that matter , why take your child on holiday if your going to palm them off to a nanny?

 im not blaming the parents and i hope everything is alright with the girl but some people dont seem to have any common sense.

what about leaving a child with the hotel's kids club during the day?

would you do that or not?

we're off to portugal with our 3 year old in a few weeks.

There is nothing wrong with that.  I would do that if I ever have Kids, but the story on the news seems as unbelievable as one of the stories out of a Jeremy Kyle episode,  I think the actions of the Parents should be looked into .  I found it hard to believe that Parents would leave their daughter and sons alone in a foreign country while they were out having dinner .

Never mind where the blame lies for now.

Let's just pray for the safe & quick return of the poor girl.

Then the debate can start.

Very true

Tikays right, forget the blame.
Its a terrible thing that has happened but you cannot blame the parents.
I remember in the news last year a young girl was taken from her own bedroom, unfortunatly we just do not expect these things to happen.
Byron  - Im sure the kids clubs will be fine.

 not a 3 year old , whats wrong with playing with and entertaining your child yourself , or taking part in the activities in the hotel with your kid.

 i think 3 years old is too young to leave them in the supervision of a stranger , perhaps when they are of school age.

 again , i aint blaming anyone , this is my view , i have a little boy who is 1 and half , and when i go on holiday with him , he will be my entertainment , i wont be leaving him with anyone ( maybe Jennifer ) but if he is playing in the pool or doing other things then i will be doing those things with him.

Byron dont leave your 3 year old with a kiddie rep unless you know exactly what the activities for the day are. Toddlers are normally kept in an activity room with paints etc so plonk yourself by the pool/bar keep your eye on the door and enjoy the peace.

Older kids (7+) can be taken on treks to the beach/nature trails etc but the ratio of child per adult is ridiculously low and I know from working in Spain for 10yrs that the reps are there for a good time and party HEAVY. Personally since having kids and going abroad every year I have NEVER left my kids in the care of a kiddy club.

As for leaving kids in a hotel room...yes I have done it. The options are to either keep them up later than their normal bedtime and have crying tired kids or to settle them in bed then go down to the bar for a couple of quiet drinks. Its very easy to check every half hour which is probably more than you would do at home and baby monitors work over there as well ;-)

I pray this family get their lovely daughter back....very sad.

When my 2 girls were growing up I never gave it a second thought leaving them in a creche at the local Mall or supermarket, having an hour or two to myself to get on with the shopping was pure bliss. Must admit though I can't remember ever using a baby sitting service at a hotel or anything like that, I preferred there was always someone in the room with them etc

It's difficult for parents if they never get any time to themselves maybe they never got any support at home and when they were away they took the option to have a quiet meal alone for once. This incident is making news as this is a first, we have not been warned of dodgy baby sitting services before, now after the event parents will be more aware.

Look at the incident when those 2 children died a short while ago from carbon minoxide poisoning before the event we would never have given this a thought but today we would all pack a tester!!

We all live and learn from these kinds of tragedies and my thoughts are with ther parents at this time

Breaking news displaying on Sky - Portugese police believe she has been abducted.

Surely this is about 24 hours late.

we only left jakob once when he was younger. We were at a nice 5 star hotel on jersey and went down to the retaurant for a meal. I phoned my wifes mobile and left the mobile next to the cot he was sleeping in and we used that as our listening service. The phone was never out of one of our hands and neither of us enjoyed the meal as we were too worried about jake being on his own. I think what the parents have done it is bordering on neglect although I do hope for the safe return of the little girl.

This is awful and i pray the little girl is returned to her parents unharmed .
I must admit to never using the type of babysitting service highlighted and to be honest wouldnt use it , when we go away the kids stay with us or a family member would babysit .
I dont trust the system in place , ie going to rooms every 5/10 minutes to check on the kids , we all know what kids are like and can easily cause no end of mischief , it just isnt me to leave my kids alone while i go out .
Saying that i wouldnt knock parents who use it , each to there own .

I'm not stating my opinion, M, I'm just quoting what I found on UK law. The above is a quote from the link I posted.
I think Tikay's right, not a time for finger pointing really, I'm sure the parents are going through enough.

BBC newsflashed it too, I'm not sure if I understood it. Door broken open, window jammed open, 3 year old missing. What did they figure yesterday, she woke up and decided to go clubbing?
British police look great in comparison, they really swoop when this happens. Not "Oh she's probably wandered off."

These news stories always drive me mad.

This is a sad sad story, and everyone wants to hear that the little girl is okay. There are a lot of views on this thread, but IMO I do not see any difference to what the parents have done, and my wife and I leaving our 2 littluns in bed and going the local pub which is 100 yards away, and one of us checking in on them every 10 minutes. If we were to do this we would end up in prison and our 2 kids removed from us, and rightly so.

Kids are kids, and will be kids and should never ever never ever be left alone. They cannot protect themselves, nor can they keep out of mischief.

Lets all hope and pray that she is okay.

And so say all of us.

Is this something parents actually do (go out and check on their children every ten minutes) or something they only say that they do so as not to appear to be 'bad parents'?

I'm not a parent, but I know that when I was 4 years old, my mum would not have left me alone for a second.

Can't say I'd leave my little girl alone for a second but I feel sorry for the parents. 

I imagine they are suffering a great deal and do so hope this comes to a happy ending.   It's all so easy to adopt a told you so attitude, wishes and thoughts to the family

 :goodpost:

My thoughts exactly Graham.

Whether the parents were right or wrong does not matter right now, ("there but for the grace of God"...) one can only imagine how bad the Parents must feel at this time.