blonde poker forum

Symptom: Feet cold and wet.
Fault: Glass being held at incorrect angle.
Action: Rotate glass so that open end points toward ceiling.
 
S: Feet warm and wet.
F: Improper bladder control.
A: Stand next to nearest dog, complain about house training.
 
S: Drink unusually pale and tasteless.
F: Glass empty.
A:Get someone to buy you another drink.
 
S: Opposite wall covered with fluorescent lights.
F: You have fallen over backward.
A: Have yourself leashed to bar.
 
S: Mouth contains cigarette butts.
F: You have fallen forward.
A: See above.
 
S: Alcohol tasteless, front of your shirt is wet.
F: Mouth not open, or glass applied to wrong part of face.
A: Retire to restroom, practice in mirror.
 
S: Floor blurred.
F: You are looking through bottom of empty glass.
A: Get someone to buy you another drink.
 
S: Floor moving.
F: You are being carried out.
A: Find out if you are being taken to another bar.
 
S: Room seems unusually dark.
F: Bar has closed.
A: Confirm home address with bartender.
 
S: Taxi suddenly takes on colourful aspect and textures.
F: Alcohol consumption has exceeded personal limitations.
A: Cover mouth.
 
S: Everyone looks up to you and smiles.
F: You are dancing on the table.
A: Fall on somebody cushy-looking.
 
S: Drink is crystal-clear.
F: It's water. Somebody is trying to sober you up.
A: Punch him.
 
S: Hands hurt, nose hurts, mind unusually clear.
F: You have been in a fight.
A: Apologize to everyone you see, just in case it was them.
 
S: Don't recognize anyone, don't recognize the room you're in.
F: You've wandered into the wrong party.
A: See if they have free alcohol.
 
S: Your singing sounds distorted.
F: The drink is too weak..
A: Have more alcohol until your voice improves.
 
S: Don't remember the words to the song.
F: Drink is just right.
A: Play air guitar.
 
 :cheers: ;dewi; ;karabiner; :dd: ;sexybanana;

dont worry about it £4 a pint next year(news today) will help cure many symptoms

Its up to £3.30 a pint anyway, putting the price up wont make a lot of difference.

where is it 4£ a pint?..other than in London..and those lapdancing clubs you frequent :)

Become a woman - then all drinks are free.....

as one of your more average looking women this doesn't really happen for me :( If out with an attractive friend though, I find it helps to stay close by so I get included when they're getting drinks bought for them  :)up

lol feministaments

A woman offered to buy me a drink once, then when we got to the bar she had no money so I ended up having to pay for it. Then she proceeded to point to a huge bloke across the room and told me she'd just broken up with him a couple of hours earlier...

I'd think I'd be the victim of a con but she didn't have a drink herself  :dontask:

which part of next year did you not understand?

Popular Beer here is

image removed

1000 ml

also known as "litro" and "jumbo" launched in 1996 Php 46 Standard Retail Price"

Php 46 = 51 pence.

getting the barman to take drinks to girls you like the look of, corny, only happens in films etc, total tosh, they love it, oh to be young free and single again.

which equates to £7.00 a litre

petrol £1.01-£1.04 a litre

wtf is wrong ???????

On the plus side though in the UK more than 60% of the population earn more than £140 a year, or 35 pints!