blonde poker forum

Drivers who drive with their fog lights on, when there is ABSOLUTELY no reason  for it  >:?

Que at the checkout at Morrisons

After 20 mins of waiting it's your turn

"Sorry I'm Closed"

I could cut her bloody feet off

regards

M

Getting a train home at night at 5.30pm, knowing it will be very busy and then the train turns up with four carriages not the usual eight and it's like being on an Indian Railway, hanging from the rafters, and the bloke next to you has never used deoderant


Aaarrrgghh

Advertisers who use the slogan "new and improved" on their product. How can this be?!?!?!? If it is new it is the first of its kind and therefore there is nothing preceeding it that could have been improved upon. If it is improved then you are taking something that previously existed and making it a better product - IT CANNOT BE BOTH!!!

Billy Connolly’s 13 things I hate about people!:
1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time….I know where my watch is pal, where the f*%@ is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?
2. People who are willing to get off their arse to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.
3. When people say “Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too”. F*%@ing right! What good is a cake if you can’t eat it?
4. When people say “it’s always the last place you look”. Of course it is. Why the f*%@ would you keep looking after you’ve found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?
5. When people say while watching a film “did you see that?”. No tosser, I paid 10 quid to come to the cinema and stare at the f*%@ing floor.
6. People who ask “Can I ask you a question?. Didn’t really give me a choice there, did you sunshine?
7. When something is ‘new and improved!’. Which is it? If it’s new, then there has never been anything before it. If it’s an improvement, then there must have been something before it.
8. When people say “life is short”. What the f*%@?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever f*%@ing does!! What can you do that’s longer?
9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks, “Has the bus come yet?. If the bus came would I be standing here, Knob head?
10. People who say things like ‘My eyes aren’t what they used to be’. So what did they used to be? ears, Wellington boots?
11. When you’re eating something and someone asks ‘Is that nice?’ No it’s really revolting - I always eat stuff I hate.
12. People who announce they are going to the toilet. Thanks that’s an image I really didn’t need.
13. McDonalds staff who pretend they don’t understand you if you don’t insert the ‘Mc’ before the item you are ordering….. It has to be a McChicken Burger, just a Chicken Burger gets blank looks. Well I’ll have a McStraw and jam it in your McEyes you f*%@ing McTosser.