blonde poker forum

??

(http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/swine_flu.png)

Can't see this being the start of a mass pandemic, but sooner or later they'll be one.

I think it's a very racist thing to call it "Swine flu", just because it was started by the Americans.

Swine Flu is God's way of making people-who-use-Twitter-to-bore-us-to-death-with-constant-pointless-updates dead

lol

rofl!

• were all going to die

Are we all going to die before JayEm1 gets to 300 posts ?

 ;D

Crow is over 800

I think we'll be ok...

I don't think the crow was looking for staking though.

and i am?
+1
inbeforeclose
Bump
hi
lol
etc etc

Lets give them something to talk about

I'm going to stake JayEm

Scaremongaraments!

Following on from fears over the swine flu virus it has been revealed that Britain will not be affected!!
Apparently the Goverment will not be letting it in in case it will offend MUSLIMS!!

With swine flu spreading fast, Kermit the Frog wishes he'd used precautions before shagging Miss Piggy. Muppet!

Americans are thought to be concerned by the swine flu Outbreak in Mexico. They fear they may have to do some work themselves instead of making the Mexicans do it for them.

I think i've caught swine flu,I've just come out in a nasty rasher...

Porky pig has released a statement today about the end of the swine flu.
"Th-Tha-Tha-Tha-That-Thats all folks"

Sandy

It's all porkies ;marks;

Simple precautions to protect your office.


1) The principal swine flu vectors are: Airborne contagion, unprotected email and Facebook. Accordingly, issue staff with flimsy paper masks, confine them to their cubicles and ban them from social networking until the World Health Organisation says otherwise.

Make sure your email antivirus software is fully up to date. A spokesman for top net security company McManTec told us: "Unfiltered email communications can facilitate the spread of H1N1 through your network in a matter of minutes with catastrophic results. Imagine your office littered with dead employees slumped over their workstations while those still breathing are coughing blood onto their BlackBerries."

The spokesman concluded: "We advise the immediate deployment of McManTec AntiPandemic 3.0®, the only known cure for 99.9 per cent of all viral menaces."

2) There is a clear and present danger from all pig-based products. Establish a "pork cordon" around your premises with security checkpoints to prevent employees smuggling in suspect foodstuffs. Be especially alert for bacon sandwiches - the traditional cure for alcoholic excess. Any worker who has eaten a bacon sandwich within the last five days should be placed in a plexiglass containment cubicle and closely monitored for the symptoms of swine flu.

Be aware that these are identical to the symptoms of a particularly spectacular hangover, so try not to panic unduly if some staff begin to shake uncontrollably and collapse under their desks - this may simply be the result of 16 pints the night before.

3) Protect key staff by isolating them from the swine flu threat - at gunpoint if necessary. Sysadmins should be sealed in the server panic room and provided with filtered air and sufficient foodstuffs for approximately two weeks. Under no circumstances should they leave the room until the Daily Mail says it is safe to do so or the supply of microwaveable mini pizzas and instant coffee runs out, whichever comes soonest.

4) If current scientific predictions are correct, around 80 per cent of the world's population will be dead with the next two weeks. Your company could be critical in rebuilding the planet's population, so select suitable members of your staff for an intensive breeding programme, to begin immediately.

Females should be selected for their sexual attractiveness and fertility. The "alpha male" tasked with mating with this genetic reserve will be the most senior member of management left alive after the pandemic has cut its swathe through the boardroom.

5) Stay calm.

Isn't 'pork cordon' the fat lad from Gavin and Stacey?

Speaking to a colleague earlier who said :-

I live in Airdrie. In fact I live next to the hospital where they took the two people they think may have swine flu.

Its got me really worried.

I mean, if two people from Airdrie could afford a trip to Mexico I'm checking my garage, because the fuckers must have been stealing things from everyone.

Sandy

LMFAO  rotflmfao rotflmfao

Brilliant! :D

This

(http://news.sky.com/sky-news/content/StaticFile/jpg/2009/Apr/Week1/15256913.jpg)

Pig flu?

I thought that was impossible.


 ;marks;

Never seen the pink arrows ??

(http://graphics.boston.com/images/bostondirtdogs//Headline_Archives/pigs_fly.jpg)

 rotflmfao rotflmfao rotflmfao

This I like

Geo

As opposed to... ?

Good point!  I think I was going to write epidemic, but changed it to pandemic.  The 'mass' was then redundant. 

Tautology for the win.

The Madagascar line on XKCD really made my morning :)

This forum never fails to deliver.
So should I go down to DTD to buy in for the £300 or get the Tamiflu for the kids before we jet off to Central America.
...
Update on phase 4 alert from WHO in the link.

http://tinyurl.com/dnaqh2

In response to the swine flu, the President of Madagascar has SHUT DOWN EVERYTHING.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/8022437.stm

What Phase 4 means is that we're kind of at a turning point. It could move to Phase 5. But it could stay at Phase 4, or even go back to Stage 3. Or it could jump a stage to 1,2, or 6.
PROGNOSIS FAIL!!!! POINTLESS ANNOUNCEMENT WIN!!!
GHOST OF GEORGE W BUSH!

Edit "What this means for countries is that they should step up factors or efforts to mitigate possible effects on their people" [of this deadly pandemic]

NOSHITSHERLOCK WIN!!!

Should have stuck to what they were good at imo

(http://rlv.zcache.com/the_who_band_playing_poster_print-p228096997544019264trma_400.jpg)

So Phase 4 is sort of like the flop?

What took him so long? :D

:)up ;applause; :)up Exactamundo! Except flops can only go forwards. Or stay the same if everyone leaves.

"A bad analogy is like a leaky screwdriver" ;)

and young Mr Phillips is nothing if not mingent.

LOL - at least I'm not full of shit ;)

:d

Good Taste FAIL: http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/360724

Evening wasted playing flash game WIN

As a precaution,

don't buy bacon

don't buy ham

dont kiss a pig

If it has a cold

ban any pigs that arrive at Heathrow from Mexico

shoot anyone that has a temperature

send any pigs already here back to pigland

If your neighbour is a pig, move

seal all windows and doors with superglue

dont except phone calls from pigs

Become Jewish, they were right after all

sell your dog, buy a Wolf

wait til monkey flu strikes - then you're all f****d, 150,000 times worse than manflu!

That's what Ice-T has been saying for years.

Is this the start of the Aporkalypse.
We're all doomed I tell ya!

 ;boltpp;

I prefer Ebola me self....

The sequel is better ;)

Yes, thanks for reminding me about this game G1BTW.

[  ] You can win without starting on Madagascar

[  ] I haven't spent 3 hours tonight trying to do so.

I did it last night, started on Australia and snook a ship into Madagascar mere seconds after they closed the ship port.

DIAGF.

rotflmfao rotflmfao

FYP

(http://i43.tinypic.com/nmkmdd.jpg)

I just tried it thanks, very very impressive, much more in-depth than the original

http://www.crazymonkeygames.com/Pandemic-2.html

having originally voted for the mass media panic option it's now starting to all look a little more concerning from where I'm sitting!

I still think it's a got a fair bit of hype, but flu symptoms are not to be sneezed at.

When I heard Gordon Brown say we were one of the best prepared countries in the world I knew it was time to panic.

:D  Not panicking here, but I do think there's more to this than previous so-called 'health scares' in my living memory.

I think I've got swine flu, I've come out in a terrible rasher  ::)

You in Mexico?

The WHO have just raised the panic alert level to Level 5.

I think Level 6 is 28 Days Later.

;applause;

I think they're wondering Who's Next?  Probably also thinking that they Won't Get Fooled Again by a false scare.

We're Doomed I tell ya.

I am a bit worried as flu normally just kills old people but this seems to be affecting my generation.

I hope it doesn't get you - we'll never find a good enough substitute.

I Don't Even Know Myself what will happen next.  But Please, Please, Please I hope the The Kids Are Alright.

If the kids are united they will never be divided!

Due to the swine flu piggeries are to be shutdown. Reports suggest Rangers will have to play home games at Hampden for the time being.

Sandy

is it a full moon today or something?

Well we were going to die eating eggs then beef then shellfish so some of us have actually been expecting to be told that breathing may kill us.

Taking the piss out of the media and the gullible is my way of spreading the don't panic message rather than making up hysteria.

We live in a country where we are told that our major oil refinery is going to close soon but we have tons of fuel to tide us over. The media preach to the gullible and forget to mention/emphasize that we won't run out. Guess what ? We only ran out before the shutdown due to the media and gullible.

I can actually imagine all these muppets lining up at surgeries up and down UK look doctor i blew my nose on this hanky and i nearly got some snot on it i have swine flu helppppppppppppppppppppppppp.

Still maybe i could sell some hazmat suits on ebay £££££

Sandy

why did those bloody mexicans not restrain themselves?

having sex with pigs is not big and not clever - FACT!

its the same way aids started ......ill let dave chappele explain (x-rated)

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=7885220

AIDS was started by Mexicans having sex with pigs? Learn something new every day.

Beastiality Baby

What ever floats there boat.. i mean.. we cant judge them lol

Edit: the mexicans are probably bored of breeding more and more of themselfs and instead of putting there kids through poverty they take there sexual frustrations out on pigs

Some huge assumptions and interesting 'theories' here.

I'd be interested to see any scientific evidence to back them up.

For this proof we must first state that ............

Gringos Illicitly Romance Lothario Swine = G.I.R.L.S 

So it wasn't the Mexicans then?

your right

this proves that an american having sex with a pig is in fact evil

multiplying by minus 1

we find non gringos having sex with pigs is in fact not evil

no it could still be the mexicans, im just trying to judge the evilness of it all

with americans now a prime suspect in the case, i suspect the texans have framed the mexicans

I think we should start questioning all Mexicans to find out exactly what they know about this disease.

I'm going to start with this one - I may be some time.

(http://blippitt.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/salma_hayek.jpg)

You are sooo funny Andrew,

To save you some time

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000161/bio

Sandy

;D

We're OK - the WHO have changed the name of this swine flu to 'influenza A (H1N1)' - which is nice.

Makes it sound more serious imo.  A better name would have been 'influenza 007 (licensed to kill)'.

I can't stop thinking of the film Outbreak with that new name...

Bang out of order, that.

Ban, plz.

I think Ling has swine flu.

Gotta be said, she looked awful yesterday, & became very unwell very quickly. Wish her a speedy recovery from me, please.

Sledge came to pick me up this morning to play golf, he needed petrol. I directed to the one near me

he said "I'm not fucking going there, I might get that pig flu"

I said "No you tw*t, I said Texaco"

don't forget to bring your face mask to DTD!

Hope Ling's better soon.

We use face masks when doing the tooth whitening here - clients have been asking for them today - the world has gone mad!

And an eminent medical expert on R4 yesterday suggested face masks are as near as useless, & 100% useless when worn beyond 60 seconds, unless they are the High-Grade Jobbies used in operating theatres.

The face masks on sale to the general public are, he said, a complete waste of time & money.

This was in the context of H1N1 avoidance, not routine hygiene.

surely that makes it harder to get to their teeth

that made me laugh much more than it should've

;D

You fool - they have a little hole in the masks to get to the teeth.

(http://s.bebo.com/app-image/7924703559/5411656627/PROFILE/i.quizzaz.com/img/q/u/08/04/08/hannibal_lector.jpg)

[ ] it would take you some time

POTW contender!

Other contenders include "can someone buy Willie Tann in?"....(dion't shoot the Messenger though!).

roll up roll up get your fack mask here

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/50pcs-3ply-Surgical-Mask-Face-Mask-Earloop-Anti-H1N1_W0QQitemZ110384053176QQcmdZViewItemQQptZUK_Health_HealthCare_RL?hash=item110384053176&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14&_trkparms=72%3A1683|66%3A2|65%3A12|39%3A1|240%3A1318|301%3A1|293%3A1|294%3A50


i might had to start bidding for one

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/health/who-will-be-the-first-arsehole-to-wear--a-facemask?-200904291731/

 Victim of the Swine flu was quoted as saying " Started with a sore throat and mild head ache then this morning I woke up like this......."

Is that George Dubya Bush's face?  Whoever's it is it looks scarily like my dad!  (any comments about their being a family resemblance with the body will be ignored!)

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v248/clairep75/tonedad.jpg)

Ok, How to spot a mexican

!. the sombrero hat

easy to spot this . A large round hat usually worn on the head

Ok How to spot a Mexican Part 2

The big moustache

How to spot a Mexican part 3

The poncho

Ok now put all 3 together and this is the guy you must avoid

LoooooL

http://imgur.com/27K39.jpg

rotflmfao rotflmfao

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spanish_flu

;gobsmacked;

It's sad how many people has died from it :/

yeah it is pretty sad

has any one decided to get any face masks?

Government leaflet says they don't offer you any protection.

Maybe they just want us all to die, ease the burden on the economy.

Happy happy news!!

http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn17100-warm-weather-may-not-halt-swine-flu.html

government leaflet came through today - what a joke

looks similar to something one of the 'experts' was saying on TV a couple of weeks ago.  Hope they're wrong.

.

I've had flu this week.  No 'head' symptoms other than the odd headache, but really sore stomach, no appetite at all, aching bones/joints, unable to sleep due to fever.  Over the worst of it now, but it was much worse than swine flu - it was man flu.

I started feeling a little unwell this morning, so called the Swine Flu hotline. All I got was crackling.

 rotflmfao rotflmfao rotflmfao ;applause; ;applause; ;applause; ;applause; rotflmfao rotflmfao rotflmfao rotflmfao

this pig flu is dangerous

Phwoar! Forget Ming-Na Wen and Cheryl Cole when you can have that beauty right there!

there`s 30.000 going to wembley next week from bramall lane that`s got this swine flu.

piggy barstewards.

omfg

It's not going anywhere....well it is, it's going everywhere:

http://www.newscientist.com/blogs/shortsharpscience/2009/05/so-is-it-a-pandemic-or-not.html

are we all doomed then?

Told you so.

If you receive an email from the Department of Health telling you not to eat tinned pork because of swine flu , please ignore it.


















It's just Spam.



 ;marks;

Sigh

Latest news in Scotland is that 16 innocent Swine Flu have caught Rangers Fan. :(

[X] ul swine flu

lol, vg

Just when you thought it was safe to go outside the World Health Organisation issue this

WHO update

Wednesday 10 June, 6:00 GMT

    * 74 countries worldwide
    * 27,737 confirmed cases worldwide
    * 141 deaths (Canada = 4, Chile= 2, Costa Rica = 1, Dominican Republic = 1, Mexico = 106, USA = 27)

A further 42 people in England have been confirmed with swine flu. One of these cases is in the East Midlands, two in the South East, six in London, 14 in the North East and 19 in the West Midlands.

Together with the one case in Northern Ireland and the 32 cases confirmed in Scotland on Tuesday, there have now been 750 cases of swine flu confirmed in the UK.

A further 607 cases are being investigated.

WHO are getting ready to declare a swine flu pandemic

If the WHO weren't such complete wimps and bowed to political pressure they would have declared this a month ago. Just calling it a level 6 rather than a level 5 is not actually going to change anything other than increase the medias level of hysteria.

Wouldn't have happened in My Generation, still .. as long as the kids are alright.

Yeah, it was a pandemic then, it's a pandemic now.

Doesn't change the fact that it's just a lot of people whinging about getting the sniffles

From that link I posted earlier:

So the WHO has decided to play it by ear, and given the unpredictability of flu, this is probably not a bad thing. Level 6 or not, the situation is serious. All scientific eyes now are on the southern hemisphere, just entering its regular flu season, where cases of H1N1 appear to be rising. The virus will now basically duke it out with ordinary flu, to see who spreads fastest.

[ ] original ;D

Doesn't declaring it an official pandemic mean that governments will now have to mass-produce vaccines? 

There aren't any vaccines for swine flu - that's the problem. 

Basically, there are a lot of governments with their heads in the sand on this one.  It's inevitable that a pandemic will eventually come along and wipe out a lot of people.  Will it be this one, who knows?

Pandemic action plans will have been made and updated regularly.

And swine flu isn't that dangerous, so "wipe out" seems a little excessive. Or are you considering becoming a tabloid journalist as a career change?

There will be a pandemic that wipes out tens if not hundreds of millions of people within our lifetime.  I doubt it'll be this one, but a mutation of the H1N1 strain could easily be the cause of such a pandemic.   

It's not cause for panic, and there's pretty much nothing that can be done to be honest. 

Not so sure about that. Anti-virals are getting better all the time, and didn't exist until a few years ago. 141 out of 27k is a mortality rate of 0.5%, which is bugger all compared to previous flu pandemics (2.5-20%). Yes, it could mutate, but anti-virals should still take the edge off.

Personally, I'd rather get it now, before it mutates. At least you're likely to have resistance to a mutated strain if that happens.

Whats the death rate for so called normal flu? I wouldnt be suprised if it was a similar percentile.

I've said it before, there are too many people on the planet for the population to be sustained at the level it is.

As for anti-virals, yes some fortunate people in the West might gain some protection from a nasty flu pandemic, but that won't help 3/5 of the world's population who don't receive vaccinations and medicines for serious diseases that are currently available.  A lot of them don't even have basic medical treatments or enough food ffs.

Around 0.1% according to wikipedia.

And Kin, yes, population growth is a worry, but it's a fairly dangerous thing to think about. Who would you prefer to kill off first? If mutated flu kills off 20% of the third world and only 2% of the first, would that be a good thing?

And that's me being devil's advocate, before I get flamed to hell and back  ;hide;.

The only way the flu will be good for population control is if it mainly gets the catholics, frankly. Every sperm is sacred and all that bollox  ;ifm;.

Famine's culling lots in the third world, the same who are being denied condoms which would prevent the spread of AIDS and help to provide the necessary birth control in those regions.

So yeah - I'm with you on the catholic church.

Have you got kids, rex008?  If so hope they stay alive and well.

If you are hoping for kids one day - hope you succeed.

If you are not bothered, fine, that's your decision.

Each death is tragic however in a pandemic, death will get reported as statistics.

Each year flu kills 500,000 people, a flu pandemic wil probably kill 10 to 50 times that, people in rich countries and rich people in poor countries will have a lower deaths per capita than everyone else.

Being borthered or not will have no affect on statistics.

Be grateful we won the ovarian lottery and were born in the West.

According to an email I just received I've won first prize in the Ovarian lottery.

I just need to send a $500 processing fee to the guy in Ovaria and then I'll get a cool $1,000,000.

Dont fall for it Andrew, it's all a load of fanny.

It will only be paid into your Sky Poker account.

FYP

Should have known my pun would go down the tube :(

WHO have gone to level 6 H1N1 pandemic & are informing member states. They will confirm publicly at 1800 GMT.

Source: New Scientist

..........................has it reached DTD?

Sad story this,

We had a pal who was a fitness fanatic, went hill walking most weekend , never went to a doctor, never got ill , until he caught flu , went to bed and rested.

5 days later he woke up and could not breath, called doctor, who said" can you cough please", he could not, so doc said " More bed rest "

2 days later, we called ambulance , he was put on ventilator, but too late, he died 5 days later at 32 from normal domestic flu.

He was a great guy and wanted a green burial. So we found a site in Olney Bucks  that had just got permission to use their field as a green burial site.

We arrived at the farm , on a windy autumn day, and carried the wicker coffin covered in flowers up the hill to the grave.We all sang songs , drank his home brewed wine, and helped fill the hole.

Six months later we returned for the tree planting where a 12 foot semi mature Oak tree was set on the grave, more songs and wine drinking.

This was 12 years ago , and every year we all return to see the tree , that has grown bigger than all the others , we guess it was all the wine we poured around the roots every year.

He was married for only 2 years before he died, and did not have any children, although he had wanted to have some later that year.

His widow is my sister in law, so we see her often. She has never re married or had a partner,but she visits the tree once a month , to tell him the latest news.

Flu can kill anyone , not just the old or young. We both have the winter jab every autumn

Our local health centre says they have plenty of vaccine to treat everyone if needs be, as when bird flu came last year all the doctors stocked up then

The govmt, ordered extra stocks 6 months ago , so if it gets worse, get down your doctors , get the jab, dont think " I never get a cold "

Sorry to be a nag, but get it done

Mr Crow - think you're confusing anti-virals (tamiflu) with vaccine there. There is no vaccine for swine flu yet, and it's unlikely before the end of the year. There isn't one for bird flu either. So yes, flu vaccine for seasonal flu strains a good idea, not happening for the others.

nhs now have an online symptom checker for swine flu, I don't think they've put enough thought into it though. it suggests that I dial 999 and ask for an ambulance immediately due to the pain across the centre of my chest. I'm not going to bother though as I'm pretty sure it's just the sunburn from sitting in the garden today

http://www.nhsdirect.nhs.uk/Sat/Topics/WizardStepOne.aspx?Host=Nhsd&SyndicationPartnerGuid=d19370ea-a100-407d-9695-b73407f701c7&TopicGuid=8c903315-a302-412a-bfae-9cb576d4b4cd

Mad cow disease//bird flu/swine flu what is this, farmageddon?

tried really hard not to, but a little giggle involuntarily escaped there!

lol, my mums a paramedic - its bad enough how many people waste their time without the nhs encouraging them to do it

The UK now has the third highest number of confirmed swine flu cases in the world behind mexico and the US, why does god hate us?

He's trying to get to Kin.

because we have the highest rate of people that go on holidays to bring it back to infect every other bugger

the first person to die of just swine flu in the uk today with no underlying causes.

We're dooooomed

(http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_p-DnkTXqSKk/SYbQDD_dKNI/AAAAAAAACwc/RMTvZ9F0o_w/s320/were+doomed.jpg)

There are now 8 confirmed cases at my husbands work..  There were 2 last week!   The first person came from holiday with it about a month or so ago, she complained of feeling ill and said she may have caught it.   Most people were laughing calling her a drama queen etc but a couple of people voiced their concerns saying she should be sent home.  Turns out her and her partner had indeed caught it and because she felt 'bad' not being at work having just been on holiday she continued to go in until a week later when a supervisor finally had the sense to send her home.

One other lass who works closely with her caught it, was sent home immediately after feeling ill and it was confirmed.  Now 6 others in the same team have got it - it's my husbands team as well. So far he seem well and OK. Lets hope it stays that way. 

It's only a matter of time now til we're all exposed to it the way it's spreading - it's hit my daughter's school already.  I rather catch it now tbh while most of the cases are still relatively mild.

Mica Richards contracts swine flu.
http://www.skysports.com/story/0,19528,11661_5425486,00.html

'Pig Flu' would seem to be a more apt name for the disease.

http://bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601202&sid=aM.7Dg3Z_msI

So in todays papers they say the first batch if immunisations will come august! I must say with a young baby I am keen to have the jab before it mutates into another form.

I didn't think that they'd have developed by August?  Thought it was going to be September at the earliest - do you have a link to the story?

Has it spread round the school Claw? Was a kid got sent home from my lads infants today and has been confirmed as swine flu.

No not yet - got a letter with some more detail and none of the children have been confirmed with it yet, but an immediate family member of a pupil has. So it's carry on as normal for now, but they're taking the view that the way things are going it's bound to directly affect a pupil at some point, if not now during the autumn term.  Not sure if there will be any point closing schools if it carries on spreading as it has.

Are they actually testing people now?  I thought that they weren't testing the majority of people who have flu-symptoms?

dunno.

Just seen that we've got another letter sent home today.  Says one of the school cleaners has also had flu-like symptoms and been prescribed tamiflu, but not been tested.  Still no cases among pupils, but letter also says:

"the Health Protection Agency are no longer advising schools which have cases of Influenza to close or giving antiviral drugs to children who do not have symptoms.  This is because the virus is now circulating freely in hte local community, so people are likely to be repeatedly exposed in thier everyday lives.'

was that your daughters school that has shut til after summer hols now? the same school as the 1 where the little girl has died?

nah - that's over in West Drayton I think?

phew

still bit too close to home though

Letter they give me today:

Dear parent or carers,

This morning i was notified that one of our pupils has been confirmed as having swine flu. This child was in school last week.As advised by the local authority we shall be open as normal.


It then goes on to quote a letter we received last friday saying antiviral drugs will no longer be routinely offered to pupils as they will still face the same risk when the course finishes.

News spread fast today and i know 1 lass who immediately took her daughter out of school, the com thing about that though is the kid who has it lives next door to her and she went round to visit! The mother also has it obv and she has a kid in high school and 1 in juniors. By the end of the hols i expect it will of been all round the village.

What is going on with it in Mexico where it was most potent, has it calmed down yet?

Mexico is second in the swine flu league

http://www.cnn.com/2009/HEALTH/07/10/swine.flu.uk/index.html?iref=24hours

i'm wondering how many deaths theyve had, it looks like we're going the same way.

There is a high probability that the Mexican figures are under-reported and that the UK figures are overcooked.

429 deaths worldwide and only 14 in Britain - I'm not planning on buying a face-mask. (Unless it's to avoid being recognised by a blondeite with a metal weight, or axe handle)

I wasnt gonna hit you with it!!

(just throw it at you or something) ::)

It's alot more widespread than has been reported. Lots of people I know around Leeds have it. I was ill for a week with a virus and went for checkup yesterday they said I most probs had it, although my symptons where being very tired, slight headache. Nothing major at all.

Depends what you read.  The scientific press have been saying that it's pandemic for a while, and that a very high percentage of the population will be infected.

My mother has it apparantly.

No visiting her for a while then.

This is brilliant.

(Not for those that are allergic to woo)

YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=suAwWMSF--s

 ;dingdell;

The Son of God speaks the Truth. Icke for next RSQM!

Not even legal to dish out medical advice like that that in the UK unless qualified, surely? Hope someone gets sick and sues the nutjob.

There is a lot of sense to what he says.  I can now confirm that my electro, chemical organism has been infiltrated by fags, mobile phones, computers and the food I eat. I was wondering why I suffer from emotional and physical problems all I need now is a flu jab and I will be well on the way to either the nut house or my coffin!

Im quite concerned by swine flu TBH. Dont get me wrong Im not like all panicky and that sort of thing, Im just really concerned my kids will get it. When I picked my son up from nursery today there was a notice saying that there is an unconfirmed case of swine flu at pre school.

We are apparently in a swine flu hotspot. We have had a high school close for 5 days and a primary school has also had an outbreak of it although that is yet to close aswell as other schools closed just a few miles down the road.

Viruses/flus/sickness bugs spread through schools like wildfire, I am glad the summer holidays will soon be here.

yeah because people are gonna take notice of him ::)

where does he live? i'm gonna go round and hit him round the head with a Louis Pasteur biography

From footballer, to commentator, to green party spokesman and then son of god.  That's some career progression!

The fella's loopy.  If you haven't read about his background before, have a look at his wikipedia page:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Icke

That's the way Jesus did it.

"JESUS SAVES!!!! simon smashes the rebound in.

I have to admit I am worried sick that Reece may get it. My mother in law has been ill over the last couple of days, stiff neck very weak, tired out etc, my sister has been confirmed although I have not been in her presence for months so no concern there of him contracting it. But being on the trains all days often very crowded is concerning me greatly for Reece's health.

As of next week, Tamiflu will be more freely available, which is important as it has to be taken ideally within 24 hrs of symptoms. I suggest your Doctor should allow you to have a supply at home, given the risk factor with Reece. Also surely he should be in the high priority group for the vaccine in late Aug/early Sept.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=suAwWMSF--s&eurl=http%3A%2F%2Fblondepoker%2Ecom%2Fforum%2Findex%2Ephp%3Ftopic%3D41571%2E180%3Btopicseen&feature=player_embedded

Read the comments on youtube, plenty will believe him. Don't blame them, who wants to be ruled by reptile people?

I believe him but i didnt want to say so untill a few other people started saying so first ::)

people starting to bowl around with the cool MJ face mask's in london, i'm gonna get one and go out and rob some people.

Tx Ripple,

looked into it last hossy visit but told no unless one of us show symptoms but this may change things.

I am virtually over my bout and its been unpleasent at worst. I didn't bother with tamiflu as the only thing it does is quicken the whole thing by a day or two. My doc said it can be taken within the first 72hrs of showing symptons. I was worried about my wife/baby but she never gets ill and the baby is on breast milk so good immune system. I would have been a little worried if they had health problems tho.

I was told to not come into work for X days until fully over it. Heard on news first batch of immunisations be rushed through.

Looking at the facts normal flu presently would be much more worrying to get and kills alot more.

I read today that some experts or another were saying they believe swine flu to be 5 times more deadly than 'normal seasonal flu' and, elsewhere, that 65,000 deaths were predicted vs a 'normal' 6000-7000

They know how many cases have been reported and how many deaths have occurred - that put's the mortality rate at about the same as normal winter flu, not every case gets reported so it's not exact but it doesn't change it by that much.

The rate isn't going to be much different whatever happens - any speculation about the number of deaths is purely speculation about how many people will catch it.

But that doesn't alter the fact that for any one individual they're more likely than not just to feel a bit ill for a bit then get better.

Seems to be really taking hold now, about 5-6 friends updates on facebook today have been that they or their kids have come down with it :(  I'm not bothered for me, but dreading Hannah catching it.

OK , worryin facts,   theres about 55,000 people with " Flu like symptoms " in the UK

 10,250 confirmed swine flu cases and 29 have died

Thats 1 in 350 will die , nasty, thats like 6 children in a school of 2000. thats like 6 children in EVERY school of 2000

gonna migrate south for the winter again

Just checked the guardian for Australia

guardian.co.uk - ‎Jul 14, 2009‎
Events in Australia (so far 6787 swine flu cases, with 18 deaths) thats about 1 in 350 again

5 days in bed, with no tv was dull. Sore throat and head spinning was the worst, I can handle being hot.

Gonna give it two more days then go back to work. Managed to stay in spare room and avoid contact with anyone so family didnt get it.

Get well soon m8

That assumes 3 things.

That every case of swine flu thus far has been reported, or your 1 in 350 figure will be off.
That the infection rate will be 100% of the population.
That school age children will die from swine flu at the same rate as the population as a whole.

Given that most people get a little sick and then get better, it's unlikely that every single one of them reported their illness. I also doubt the infection rate will be 100%, not everyone caught the black death iirc.
The third assumption may well turn out to be mor or less the case though.

Also, why do you mention a school with 2,000 pupils specifically. Isn't the average size of a school in the UK much smaller than that?

Rather than 6 dead kids (zomg not the children) in every school, it'll problably be closer to 1 dead kid in every 6 schools.

Cough, I feel rough.
(http://www.bulldogblog.net/articles/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/flu3.jpg)

are we all dead yet?

You are looking better though. ;)

Thanks.  :D

poker players highly at risk to this because of the germs spread on chips and the closeness of all poker players at the tables? i no someone who had swine flu and still went to play. pretty fucked up imo

A cull of poker players wouldn't necessarily be a bad thing.  Sounds like he was carrying out a public service.

Think i caught my cold/flu in Edinburgh.

  ::)

My catholic friends are telling me that their churches no longer serve communion under the form of wine, just bread, in order to minimize the risk of transmission.

 ::) ::)

Jesus will be turning in his grave.

I wonder if someone he infected could sue (altho he prob hasn't any money and is unemployed).

You'd have thought that he'd zap the nasty viruses (the ones he made, and saw that they were good)  in holy water.  Obviously he's too busy to do that at the moment...

The related story I read was of churches not using holy water for fear of passing on swine flu.

At first I thought how ironic that was, but then I realised they're clearly going against God's will - I'm pretty sure the only people He would let get swine flu from holy water are The Unworthy (http://blondepoker.com/images/the_new_era/uk_players/daniel_philips.jpg)

lol

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20081118092707AAo5tuc

 rotflmfao

You laugh, but homoeopathic water is provided to people on the NHS...

If there were a God and if he were to favour his followers by zapping the nasty viruses or destroying the cancer cells of people who sang him hymns then after a statistically significant sample of the faithful living and the non-believers dying the existence of God would be proved.

This would change the nature of faith, believing would not be a choice. God would be undeniably there and at that point he'd cease to become an immortal Deity whose existense transcends our own understand and just be some kind of unelected dictator whose policies or their lack of implementation we can moan at in a conventional way (but not too noisily lest we be stricken with a pox).

As much as I disagree with the logic used by people using the whole pain/suffering thing as an argument against the existence of God, it doesn't put me on tilt.
What does put me on tilt is the minority (I hope it's a minority) of loony so called Christians who think that people who get sick are being punished or people born with disabilities are being smited for the sins of previous generations.

Atheists, Christians, I hate 'em all.
God I like though (plz no cancer 1 time)

so colonic irrigation with holy water could cure pretty much anything... i have such good ideas i can't believe i'm not a zillionaire yet :(

If there was a god, why does he test people with this faith bull?  Is it part of some celestial game he's playing?  He's bloody good and hide and seek though, I'll grant you that.

Oh, and a central idea of Christianity is that we are being punished for the sins of our forefathers (and mothers).  So it's not a minority of Christians - it's ALL true Christians.

Love it.

That's one possible reason.

If God is playing a game, it's unlikely that the rules he uses are the same as Hide and Seek or the controls are the same as The Sims on the Playstation 2. More likely that he's up to something neither you or I understand.

please for the love of god i beg you dont get kinboshi started  ;pokergods;

Punishment in the sense that we are subject to an existence that we know now where we have to look after ourselves and bad shit happens sometimes.

Not punishment in the form of writing lines of a blackboard during detention or getting ill.

and on the 7th day, after he had his little break, he created the 51st state of the USA and dealers at the APAT in Edinburgh.

[ ] well done

The convo between Betrand Russell and Frederick Copplestone SJ is a good read. At one point Copplestone asks him what he would say to God if he dies and finds himself there in front of God. Russell replies 'Why did you not make your existence more apparent to me during my lifetime".

A couple of my friends are bona fide (geddit) religious zealots, and in one of these convos (the type of which I've now given up on) one of them dealt me a killer blow with the question 'So what would God have to do to prove his existence to you?' F F S

Seems to me if you were setting up some kind of bullshit religion that made no real sense it would be best to have a 'Faith' element to it, to refute those few followers who actually started smelling something.

AAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111oneoneoneleventyonehundredandeleven

too late, Kinboshi on thread.

don't worry, I'll distract him

going dead fast is really bad and kills bunnies and stuff

Paula Radcliffe is the nutz.

(http://pix.motivatedphotos.com/2009/5/2/633768726866601725-mark513.jpg)

Would agree with that. It's an awfully tidy get out clause and could be a complete fabrication. There's a chance God does not exist in any form.

Although if I were to be convinved by above argument that any God definately does not exist then I would also be convinced by Loose Change that Bush and Cheney definately planned 9/11 because it's a bit iffy how the buildings fell and they had something to gain by scaring us all.

Just spotted this thread and it's very worrying as I've never heard of swine flu.

Is there a smart arse on here who could possibly explain to me what it is.

As much scientific detail as possible is required so it will need to be a school teacher type person of incredible knowledge.

Is there anybody here capable of this I wonder? Please help now!!!!

in a nutshell...

Excellent. Thanks mate.

If that clever person's still available maybe they could just discuss the existence of God instead.

lmao love it

YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbt_PuVAVTU
 :D

Good luck in finding a therapist that will use it. I'm afraid rather than trusting in The Lord we prefer to trust in water clinically filtered, the only priests we've had in here have been for treatments!

what does clinically filtered mean? I have googled and wikied can't find anything on it

I used the words 'clinically filtered' as opposed to filtered by Gods representative - it's not a specific process as such as far as I'm aware. We filter using the Reverse osmosis method. More info can be found here.  http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-a-reverse-osmosis-water-filter.htm

ty, who is the olympic lifting coach who tells his athletes to drink lukewarm water plz?

Olympic? Who knows! But GB trainer details are on the correct thread but I don't have details of their blood groups so please don't ask me!  ;D

WTF?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/8196807.stm

At last! Some positive action!

At the back you can see a couple of the stewardesses getting flustered because they only have three kosher meals to give out.

they are doing Your work.

That's my point!!  Imposters!!

i'm 99% sure that swine flu is just the common cold.

tell me that after you had it..

dude, do a swine flu website.

Get pinged from google news stories containing swine flu. You can then pick out the interesting ones and the significant developments and write about them on your site, along with info about what it's like to have it etc etc.

Google adsense ads for facemasks, anti-viral drugs and the like. $50/month by Decemeber. Simples

Doctors think they may have found the most direct method of contracting swine flu.

Ah, i have spent many a Friday night like that in my younger days.

(http://failblog.files.wordpress.com/2009/09/epic-fail-innoculation-fail.jpg)