blonde poker forum

Monday night sees the final of the finest, toughest, unapologetically brutal quiz on the tellybox.

For those of you who have never seen Only Connect, it's a quiz about connections between seemingly unconnected things: a triceratops, Lisa Simpson, Captain Spock and Richard Gere are all vegans. An opponent, an egg, the clock and Michael Jackson's It can all be beaten. You get the idea.

No? Ok, well allow me to give you a more distinct flavour, with perhaps a little Tal thrown in for good measure...



[Posh music. Fade in. Camera to Mrs Double-EPT]

(http://www.ukgameshows.com/p/images/thumb/e/ed/Only_connect_victoria_coren_mitchell.jpg/400px-Only_connect_victoria_coren_mitchell.jpg)

"Hello and welcome to Only Connect; a show so fiendish it has its own sudoku category, largely because it refuses to use real numbers. Have you ever tried fitting the square root of minus one into a three centimetre square on a moving train on the Bakerloo line at rush hour? You have? Well, let's begin the quiz...

On my right:

- Ian Turton, a maths graduate who once hit the Fifteenth Earl of Merton with a frying pan;
- Holly McCann, a civil engineer with a collection of 11,700 rolling pins; and
- Oscar Pembridge-Smyth, a historian who enjoys hill-walking and had a selfie with Barack Obama

They're all connected through a love of the works of Slipknot. They are, The Bleeders.

And on my left:

- Amundeep Chopra, a chartered surveyor with a passion for genealogy and who has traced his family tree back to 830BC;
- Todd Lowe, a tree surgeon who once beat Princess Beatrice in a game of Kerplunk; and
- Sarah O'Malley, a pilot who co-wrote an episode of the US Comedy Taxi!

They're all united through their mutual interest in all things butterfly and moth. They are The Lepidopterists."

[Round one: you're looking for the connection between four things. The teams get three sets each. The earlier you buzz and identify the connection, the more points you score.

The Bleeders get:

1. Imaginary
2. Old Man
3. Trumpet
4. Eminence

They buzz]

"Are they all types of mushroom?"
"They're not all types of mushroom. Lepidopterists?"
"We think they're the nicknames for eighteenth century Archbishops of York."
"An excellent steal, there. They are, of course the nicknames for eighteenth century Archbishops of York."

[The Lepidopterists get:

1. Arthritis
2. Abridgement
3. Alien invasion
4. Aesthetics

They buzz]

"We think these might be the names of episodes of QI."
"An excellent attempt...and a correct one!"

[Round two: the connected things are given in a sequence. Your job is not to name the connection, but what comes fourth in the sequence. Three each, as before.

The Bleeders get:

1. Skippedy Scak
2. Bippedy Boop
3. Zimmedy Zum

and correctly identify the fourth item as 'Scatman', these being the four biggest songs of the 90s musician Scatman John in ascending order.

The Lepidopterists fail to notice that Turtle Wax, Wholemeal Bread and Paracetamol should be followed by the Light Bulb, as they were successive inventions by Thomas Edison.

Round three is the connecting wall: four connecting things are mixed up with three other connecting things in a block of sixteen things. They get a wall each to solve. Points for the groups; points for the connections; bonus points for the lot.

(http://www.ukgameshows.com/p/images/thumb/8/80/Onlyconnect_connectingwall.jpg/400px-Onlyconnect_connectingwall.jpg)

The Lepidopterists spot four things based on Hamlet (including the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air of course), four things that can be worn and four things that are spelt the same forwards as backwards in French, but fail to notice that Andy Sinton, Sir Richard Branson, Will Carling and David Beckham all won Glovewearer of the Year.

The Bleeders have a 'mare, failing to spot anything, particularly embarrassed when they are informed that the four sporting venues they are shown all contain the names of capital cities.]

"With the scores close, we now have round four. We take some things that are connected, remove the vowels, squidge together the consonants and leave you to buzz in when you know what they are"

[The Lepidopterists rattle through the Leonard Cohen songs and the species of otter, but are trounced on characters in Ally McBeal and chess openings. They share the spoils on Simon Cowell putdowns]

"And so ends another episode. Join us next time for questions so markedly unfair, you'll be posting about them on a poker forum to an audience of people who have no idea what you're waffling about, while I kick back with a sharp glass or three of gin, being fanned by an army of hornèd vipers. Goodbye."

[Posh music. Fade out.]



It's worth half an hour of your life just to see whether anything I've said above bears even the most remote resemblance to what happens on Monday night. I'd suggest taping the second Corrie for half an hour. You can always watch it 9.

I have absolutely no idea what has just happened.  I think I enjoyed it though!

Nurse!

You never listened tp Brain of Britain on Radio 4?

Quizzes don't get better than that. No silly buzzer things either.

Somehow reminded me of this:

YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lTWfdCsKE0A

It's a great show! Weekly family dual and competitive battle with this show!

You forgot the golden ratio of Only Connect

beards/glasses must equal 1

A really incredible show. Really should watch it if you've never seen it before.

The amount of casual knowledge you can pick up by watching is brilliant.

A bit disappointed that Tal wasn't ending his post with 'let's create an RSQ-style(ish) Only Connect quiz' :(

I've not been a fan of this series. The questions have got far too tough. Yes, they were always hard but at least they made sense when explained. This series even the teams have blank looks on their faces when they're hgetting told the answers. Anagrams in the connecting walls is just evil too.

lol winning team one glasses one beard.....

Ok, I thought the fact that the 32 connecting wall clues were all 4 letter words was quite clever. Made them quite evil without feeling cheap. I also didn't mind the anagrams as they were quite obvious.

I don't want them to dumb it down when they move to BBC2 but I think after this series they need a rethink over just how abstract and obscure they want it to be.

Ridic difficult final - we were stumped on pretty much everything bar bits of the wall and some of the missing vowels.

Dan, Sheriff and I were all set to apply a couple of series ago but the dates were no good for us, so if we get to have a stab at getting on next series a slight dumbing-down for bbc2 would be no bad thing!

I always aim for three correct answers ( not including missing vowels). I hope BBC2 doesn't dumb the show down, it's fine as it is.

An only connect style forum quiz would be awesome if anyone fancies taking it on? Someone posts a question and the person who gets it correct posts the next one and so on?

Quiz is at the right level IMO; it's not supposed to be The Chase. Gets harder as the rounds progress and noticeably so. I finish the quiz smiling every week: it's good to be tested properly and, if you get one right, engage smug mode.

Down with dumbing down!

As for a blonde equivalent, would think a Wall would be the way forward; pressure on the compiler, too, that way. Would suggest the first compiler (*cough hutch cough*) sets a wall and then announces when the reveal will be, so it's fastest finger first and everyone's in direct competition.

Seeing as I have no children to teach until September, I might venture at having a go at generating a wall.

Thoughts on how it could be organised? Write the wall, post it on here and have groups and reasons PM-ed to me?

Then a reveal with the correct answers and scores out of 10 for all involved?

How's that sound?

Def sort the wall out in advance, announced it's done (with however dramatic a tone as befits the occasion) and give everyone a day or two's notice to have their pencils sharpened.

Post the wall in the same thread (this one? Another?) at reveal o'clock. Everyone PMs answers and the tie break is who sends theirs in first?

Option to do easy/medium/hard/final level ones simultaneously?

Oooh this has potential!

I posted a wall I made about a year ago but no one wanted to play :(

found my wall - I'm going to have to try to solve it myself because I can't remember the answers :D

I've solved it.

Members of steps
Alternative words for annoy
Things you find in the kitchen
Can all be followed by "ball"

:)  I think i've got it pretty much sussed - will re-post it here if anyone wants a bash whilst waiting for the proper wall night

(http://fbcdn-sphotos-g-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xaf1/t1.0-9/r270/1002792_10151691861170638_1985254693_n.jpg)

Black/Golf/Lost/ Tabloids??

Geo

3/4 :)

Fancy doing this when there's football on

::)

In general I would agree but I can't help but think this series has been noticeably harder. Having done some research it would appear that the question editor left at the end of the last series and they have new people doing it.

Hard questions is one thing but when the answer is revealed people should be going "Aaahhh!" rather than "How was I ever supposed to get that?"

Will switch my mind to fiendish and have a look at this today. Sure I can come up with something suitable and will try and stay away from Chemistry as I'm on a well-earned break!

Stribling PMd me some answers - not quite right but along the right track.  anyone else want a bash at it before all is revealed?

I'm stumped.

answers in teeny writing below

Albatross, Bogie, Fore, Austin (Golfing Terms)
Sun, Sawyer, Boone, Hurley (Lost Characters)
Express, Eagle, Beauty, Idol (American ______)
Mirror, Jack, Box, Hole (Black ______)

Austin?

You'll have to explain that one.

I got it from 'glossary of golf' on wikipedia. i'm hoping it's just obscure rather than made up.

Sorry, but it looks made up to me, any ball anywhere could lay claim to being an 'Austin' surely?

My effort... PM answers or post in small text or something so as to not spoil :)

(Group contents rather than just group names)

(http://i797.photobucket.com/albums/yy259/CfNana/IMG_2361.jpg?t=1405083298)

Apart from the Austin controversy "Bogie" is spelt "Bogey".  A "bogie" in Scotland is a child's home-made (usually from a pram) chariot-like conveyance OR an unsightly nasal excretion.  (I'm surprised Geo didn't comment but maybe Edinburgh folk are too posh for bogies of both kinds)

Haha - my wall has turned out to be nearly as much of a farce as your average rsq!

Pm sent to cf. Moar walls!

can you explain what i am looking to do here please?

the post it notes have a connection horizontally? vertically? diagonally?

or potentially all three?

so i need 4 words and an answer so 4 connections?

You're looking to find 4 groups of 4 and what the connection in each group is.

So answers in the format:

Group A - a,b,c,d
Group B - e,f,g,h

etc

Some clues could belong to multiple groups but the idea is there is only one correct solution.

The layout of the clues is random and should not be read into.

As I am not up to much today I have designed a second wall. I shall wait a while before I post it though so people can have a go at the above one and other people can post theirs first.

The second one is quite a bit trickier lol. The one above is a warm up!

Claw PM'd her answers and got the above one right!

In, pm sent. 

Is it okay if I crash this party?

PM's plz if anyone has a go.

So much harder to do when the rows you get right don't lock up.

finding this one quite tricky!  PMing a half-attempt

You are half right.
Have another crack at your third and fourth answers.

David got it spot on!

got Dan to have a look at it too - we're stumped!

ah - think i've got it (resorted to google though :()

Lol, I retract the well done I sent you by pm, I hadn't seen this post then!

You'll never solve my next one then, it's a doozy but im waiting till cf has finished with his before I post it.

:D

Best. 

Show.

Ever.

What is going on in the world? 

Just bought a bike today and the young man was telling me that gear levers disappeared in the 1980s.  I had to ask him how I changed gear on the thing.  The whole thing seemed to weigh about as much as a brake pad on my old bike. 

I went to the shop the other day.  There was a whole shelf of Gordon's gin, but not a single bottle of Beefeater.  Don't get me even started on the shampoo shelves.  I had the choice between some anti dandruff shampoo for men, 150 different shampoos for women and 25 for children. 

Now Tal is putting a full stop between every word. 

Between.
Every.
Word.

Getting old is happening too quickly.

Tonight's OC redefined 'bastard hard' - I got an unprecedented zero right on the first two rounds.

Fully get you, but there are times where the rules of punctuation need to be suspended, doobs.

The Only Connect grand final is the television equivalent of a black hole: an infinitely concentrated, incomparable collection of information no one can seem to understand, where the established laws of physics we use for everywhere else in the known universe don't apply.

Seems only right to cast aside the laws of punctuation and hope some wise souls in suits throw BAFTAs at it.

So, how do you change gear?

Rather than the old manual levers, there are 2 tiny levers the size of the ones you get on an old school bell and you click one lever one way and it goes up and you click the other lever the other way and it goes down.  Seemed a nighmare and when I had a quick go out, as I just seemed to be switching up.

This fells knows much more than me, mine are Shimano shifters.  I don't think video man likes them.  Maybe I should have watched this before buying!

YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EvzLOt1599U

The young fella's original response was "they are shimanoes", as if that was enough to explain it.  I think he was used to dealing with people who know what day it is.

Back. of. the. net. A one nil household victory thanks to knowing the lyric's to Vogue which is about as low as you can get in terms of OC questions.

LOL. When you said no levers I though you literally meant no leavers. Even I am familiar with that type of gear change, they've been around for ages.

Exactly how old are you Dooby?

http://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/tvandradioblog/2016/jan/19/only-connect-the-uneasy-appeal-of-britains-hardest-quiz-show

Spare a giggle for the last line.

Question for the fellow OC Nerds: those facts that are read out about each of the contestants ("...who once mistook Michael Portillo for a Welsh dresser", "...who once at a whole jar of pickled asparagus", "...who has the world's third largest collection of Bahamian lingerie")

Made up or real?

Or better still, do a true one about yourself.

Red Dog, who once jumped into a snowdrift sans trousers.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/showsandtours/takepart/only_connect