blonde poker forum

once there was a poker player named

ironside, who unfortunately never made

any money due to his amazing

inability to play his Ace King

by waaaaay overbetting it after the

flop, which failed to improve his

table image and confidence to boot

. he decided hold em was not

his forte! Lapdances however were more

fulfilling and satisfyed all his requirements

try concentrating on two words now

said the wooly jumper wearing stud

who had a penchant for sheep.

which he kept in his cellar

along with an incredible selection of

bad beat stories which he wrote

using a red biro and a

a cup of old sheeps blood

. One fine day in the middle

of the summer, tank bumped into

a lampost and wondered who

Edit, realise it was 5, changed it,  but then tank had already posted

would notice if he pretended that

he wasn't wearing pink suspenders and

a tutu, anyway he said too

similar to 2 word story thread

, so made a descion to abstain

from posting on an old thread

and nursed his bruised forehead. Glasgow

and hookers, booze, gambling and drugs

but he forgot the lapdancers, so

went to the cashpoint for good

times sake. Then he was shot

stabbed for good measure and kicked

in a place that made him

cry. Right in his big hairy

left nostril.The one with the

green snotters and large red pluke

 right on ossie ardiles' Tottingham shirt

,wich was bought by colchester kev.

Then suddenly, there was a horrible

sound coming from the abandoned warehouse

Scooby Doo and his motley crew

said "sod this, lets sign on"

 :D

Twelve burly men in boiler suits

Hatched a fiendish plan to steal

one billion dollars. They phoned up

Dial-A-Crook and asked for

Express delivery of the Rupert Murdoch.........

autobiography entitled "The decline of broadcasting

standards in the modern world, copyright.....

boltpp and the tank BP 2006".

Which was quickly discredited by the...

whole of the big wide world.

Tank cried but bolt was a man :D

with a plan.  His plan was

to rotate his nipples through 360^o

And this was he's second attempt

but this time he used only

the forceps rather than his entire

bankroll to enlist the help of....

a dozen nubile young women with

A propensity for tourture and pain

. Twelve hours elapsed, and still no

sign of nipple flexibility, so bolt...

channelled the power of his mind

And called upon the spirit of..

Mary Whitehouse.  Mary told Bolt to

cover up quick son. However he

could find nothing to wear except

A matching thong and bra, so..

he decided to go commando. Hilariously...

It was a VERY cold day so....

he suffered goose bumps everywhere even...

in the depths of his most

cracked paving stones. Meanwhile Claw snarled

peacefully in her sleep, dreaming of

a white christmas, just like the

pure ones sold on bolt's estate

0:-) Though Bolt denied all knowledge of

having appeared in Claw's dream. Fortunately

she did not die from the

hoover accident, but her extension cord

replaced her dead batteries in her

Favourite toy.  Tightend decided to

buy a bottle o' Ginger fae

How many?

------------------------------------------------------------------------

and go hang out at his

favourite club which just happend to

be at the top of his

list of places to drink Ginger

and hosting a nipple tweaking contest.

which he always won even though

They soon ran out of Ginger

and Flushy's bedroom, having seen a

shop that sells Ginger down the

If you keep saying ginger i'm............ ;D :tikay:

ginger ginger ginger ginger ginger forever.

Chris Evans is a ginger person

I knew a cat called ginger

Said Flushy whilst stuck underneath a

giant ginger drinking ginger panda.

That eats shoots and leaves  ;D  then.................

makes it to the nightclub just

in time for the carbonated water

but ginger beer was more tasty

when supped in moderation, to that

add a little stirring for extra

drinking pleasure, then down in one.

Leaves more time for indulging in

such pursuits as eating jelly and

ice cream wearing paper hats. Young

hearts, run free, never be hung

like a donkey.  "shame" said Claw.

Who's intent was clearly to bruise

an apple by bouncing it off

A physics teachers head, and then

onto tanks head with maximum velocity.

The apple still did not bruise.

So we took it back to

the nightclub and asked the barman

where the hell the greengrocers is

He couldn't remember but he said

Snow white sells apples, be warned.....

*3rd appearance on blonde ladies and gentlemen  :D

. A big round of applause for

all the good people at Dixons

, the greengrocers with bruise resistant apples.

and Mersons, and Adams, gooners are

adept at fruit selction. Weil's disease

makes you look like this :hello: but.......

it could be worse, you could

Incoherent nonsense the sory so far .......

Once there was a poker player named ironside, who unfortunately never made any money due to his amazing inability to play his Ace King by waaaaay over betting it after the flop, which failed to improve his table image and confidence to boot . he decided hold em was not his forte! Lap dances however were more fulfilling and satisfied all his requirements try concentrating on two words now said the woolly jumper wearing stud who had a penchant for sheep.  which he kept in his cellar along with an incredible selection of  bad beat stories which he wrote using a red biro and a cup of old sheep’s blood. One fine day in the middle of the summer, tank bumped into of the summer, tank bumped into would notice if he pretended that he wasn't wearing pink suspenders and a tutu, anyway he said too similar to 2 word story thread, so made a decision to abstain from posting on an old thread and nursed his bruised forehead. Glasgow  and hookers, booze, gambling and drugs but he forgot the lap dancers, so went to the cash point for good times sake. Then he was shot stabbed for good measure and kicked in a place that made him cry. Right in his big hairy left nostril. The one with the green snotters and large red pluke right on ossie ardiles' Tottenham shirt ,which was bought by Colchester Kev. Then suddenly, there was a horrible sound coming from the abandoned warehouse Scooby Doo and his motley crew said "sod this, lets sign on Twelve burly men in boiler suits Hatched a fiendish plan to steal one billion dollars. They phoned up Dial-A-Crook and asked for Express delivery of the Rupert Murdoch.........  autobiography entitled "The decline of broadcasting standards in the modern world, copyright..... boltpp and the tank BP 2006".  Which was quickly discredited by the... whole of the big wide world.  Tank cried but bolt was a man with a plan. His plan was to rotate his nipples through 360o  And this was he's second attempt but this time he used only the forceps rather than his entire bankroll to enlist the help of.... a dozen nubile young women with A propensity for torture and pain. Twelve hours elapsed, and still no sign of nipple flexibility, so bolt... channelled the power of his mind And called upon the spirit of.. Mary Whitehouse. Mary told Bolt to cover up quick son. However he could find nothing to wear except A matching thong and bra, so. He decided to go commando. Hilariously... It was a VERY cold day so.... he suffered goose bumps everywhere even...in the depths of his most cracked paving stones. Meanwhile Claw snarled peacefully in her sleep, dreaming of  a white Christmas, just like the pure ones sold on bolt's estate Though Bolt denied all knowledge of having appeared in Claw's dream. Fortunately she did not die from the hover accident, but her extension cord replaced her dead batteries in her Favourite toy. Tightend decided to buy a bottle o' Ginger fae and go hang out at his favourite club which just happened to be at the top of his list of places to drink Ginger and hosting a nipple tweaking contest. which he always won even though They soon ran out of Ginger and Flushy's bedroom, having seen a shop that sells Ginger down the If you keep saying ginger I’m ginger ginger ginger ginger ginger forever.  Chris Evans is a ginger person I knew a cat called ginger Said Flushy whilst stuck underneath a giant ginger drinking ginger panda. That eats shoots and leaves then.................makes it to the nightclub just in time for the carbonated water but ginger beer was more tasty when supped in moderation, to that add a little stirring for extra drinking pleasure, then down in one. Leaves more time for indulging in such pursuits as eating jelly and ice cream wearing paper hats. Young hearts, run free, never be hung  donkey. "shame" said Claw Who's intent was clearly to bruise an apple by bouncing it off A physics teachers head, and then onto tanks head with maximum velocity.
The apple still did not bruise.  So we took it back to the nightclub and asked the barman where the hell the greengrocers is He couldn't remember but he said Snow white sells apples, be warned..... *3rd appearance on blonde ladies and gentlemen. A big round of applause for
all the good people at Dixons , the greengrocers with bruise resistant apples. And Mersons, and Adams, gooners are

I would buy that if published

By playboy magazine with pictures of

Bolt's nipples being rotated to maximum

capacity, by a group of angry

members of the Womans Institute

who smeared their home made jam

On Toast that was so burnt

that it gave new meaning to

breakfast in bed. when bolt recovered,

remembering it was six words each!

he regretted using only five. dam

I lost my purse, it had

bolts nipple clamps in it. he

must have half inched it while

i was busy plotting another scheme

to get bolt and sark to

form a comedy duo to perform

at blonde bash three,but sark

wanted to go in a different

directions,involving nudity, violence and heroin

This went against bolt's puritanical background

which included celibicy and no alcohol

. To avoid disappointing the bb3 punters

built a bridge and got over

a very high wall surrounding the

moat to the castle. Suits of

armour where useless in the moat.

As all the fishies have sharp

waterproof televisions and video recorders.the

sharks however, have enormously overrated ginger 

bottles, filled with vodka and coke,carp

are very fond of dry martinis

olives,cous cous,and petit pois.

No-one eats Volous vons at parties

and the sausage rolls were pure

tasty which didn't help the voules

[vol] au vents which went a little

soggy in the middle although just

firm enough to eat with sawdust

obtained from the work bench of

a gentlemantly carpenter whose name was

joseph christ,who specialised in decking.

Meanwhile, over at Brad Strider's house

owls hoot in the toilet.angels

by Robbie Williams is playing on

, despite strider smashing up the stereo.

There's just no stopping Robbie sometimes

especially in Claw's imagination - oooer missus.

And through it all, she demands

Robbie to recommend a good greegrocers.

cos her peaches were looking a

bit off really, so the next

time he visits the fruit stall

he could grab some melons.  Coincidentally

Pamela Anderson was coming down the

motorway on a Suzuki doing 140

Fellow motorists were stunned to see

a total eclipse of the sun.

Which normally only occurs once every

one has gone to bed. Pamela was

enthralled by the strange way her

bike was handling. It was veering

all over, but seemed to handle

much better during major solar events

Gravity never really plays with plastic

However, intense solar rays have been

used on her dodgy tattoos which

spontaneously combusted and left her with

a career on the London stage

where she learnt how to pick

pockets in oliver twist, which received

a reinstate Pluto t shirt from

the HIPPP fundraising shop, buy one

its such a worthy cause innit.....

your donations will help save a

baby panda. So everyone gave

six words, expcept Poppet who gave

five because she wanted to rebel!

It wasn't that she couldn't count

words. she just didn't want to!

luckily for some tank was around

to smack her bottom and warn

her not to speak to strange

Strange looking poker players with

anally retentive word counting habits. Yesterday

whilst sitting at his breakfast table

John McClane got a phonecall. His

previous girlfriend informed him that she

has been taken hostage by an

alien life form by the name

Zerg, the terror of the cosmos

. Why does the same s**t happen

asked a small rodent like creature

well my fine fetherd freind said..

"Cock-a-doodle-doo" and was

run over by a massey ferguson

and the toilets were all blocked

and the sinks were overflowing onto

all the womens feet and into

the mouths of the small children

who were shorter than terry hillman.

Such a catastprophe, your eyes would

explode. Like you been BAD BEAT!!!!

 ;technophobe; ;technophobe; ;technophobe; ;technophobe; ;technophobe;

Suddenly, I smelt a smell I

must have produced myself, my rear

view mirror misted up with the

heat which was undoubtably caused by

the manure stuck to the masseys

tailpipe.the inside of the massey

looked like a huge piece of

turkish delight which had been nibbled

by mice that had escaped from

the former planet of pluto.  Suddenly

the hitchhikers guide to the galaxy

guy,ford prefect,predicted the end

of the world with intricate detail

.worryingly prefect predicted september the ninth.

As the date when poker stopped

and armageddon started.thunder bolts and

drops of rain shaped like a

mutated african elephant, and reeked of

soggy bannas pelted the home of

geordie superstars ant and dec.acid

was thrown at them by disgruntled

golf fans,and biker grove extras.

they also threw buckets of rancid

fish guts over cat deeley.meanwhile

the sugarbabes and girls allowed argued

over american foreign policy and the

decision to demote Pluto from a

stupid bunch of incompetent scientists. hell

would freeze over before the man

who became president,ken dodd whose

tickling stick was losing its feathers

due to a Mr Sheen shortage

,caused by kids buzzing them.astonishingly

no-one in the western hemisphere was

aware of the craze until it

was mentioned in one of Tank's

rather interesting articles on fly fishing

entitled, "It's all in the wrist."

J R Hartley launched a lawsuit

he found he's solicitors number in

his little black book that he

kept hidden inside his very old

copy of the Yellow Pages.  He

then procieded to ring his laywer

unfortunately he had the wrong number

So he rang 118-118 for some help

. The call cost him the grand

he made appearing in those ads

from many, many years ago now

. It was the best of times,

it was the dull old times

Four score and ten years ago

before the internet was invented. He

could see paradise by the dashboard

of a 1981 Ford Escort. Unfortunately

this escourt was a little old.

even though it was 65 years

younger than Tikay.  J R Decided

to watch Anchorman, probably the best

option, given that it was now

time for bed. He picked his

nose and flicked his bogey at

claw, who caught it in her

new oven gloves and wiped it

all over the new pinny she

had bought Sark for his birthday.

It was that time again, billions

of teeny tiny penguins, marched towards

WH smiths to protest about their

leader being held prisoner in the

back to school section amongst the

pens, pencil, rulers and school uniforms

It was all a big misunderstanding

an erect-crested penguin ISNT a

good role model for kids but

does look like a pencil case

if you look at it from

a certain angle. The penguins demanded

4 copies of card player and

and several packets of chocalate covered

fish, they stuttered excitedly whilst waddling

through Virgin, to get the latest

news on the Dow index. Up

the gooners shouted nemesis, confused by

what tank had just shouted at

,alas,the penguins tiring marched onwards

across the zebra crossing, up the

road to drury lane to see

about buying guns. Weapons that would

fire three wooden pellets per hour!!

Don't you just love the theatre?

don't YOU just love the theatre?

I'm not the Drury Lane bufty  :D

I was thinking of muffin man!!!!!! :D

pffft, I've seen you queue for

jerry springer the musical, but i

cried like a little girl when

noddy the musical was on, isn't

it illegal when Big Ears was

playing excitedly with PC Plods helmet!

It was such a shiny helmet

. It needed to be polished with

a combination of polish,grease and

given a good hard rub down.

Eeany meany miney mo, wizard jolly

shot a bow, an arrow flew

right over the head of this

cute little milk carton.  What happened

to 12barblues, he's gone missing. It

is an awful status quo album,

all the songs sound the same

just like all the other so

solid crew records, they all sound

like complete twaddle.  I remember when

little jimmy osmond sang his first

hardcore gangsta rap tune styled with

tony blair and ozzy osbourne, and

featuring guest vocals from the legendary

karaoke queen claw 75 but she

is such a shite singer that

she made status quo sound good.

which is rather easy as claw

would demonstrate next weekend.  Let's go

fly a kite up to the

highest height, let's go fly a

kite and send it soaring up

to the atmosphere, up where the

atmospheric pressure, with fewer molecules will

make it very difficult for the

story to suddenly change direction onto

the topic of poker, which is

causing me to make bad choices

in very important areas such as

what colour cards to play and

how many times to jump around

punching the air after eliminating some

harmful bacteria from the kitchen sink

having discovered the joys of new

cillit bang, barry scotts wonder cleaner

that tackles even the most stubborn

big, bad, ugly looking bogeys and

and then recycles them into liquid

energy drinks, which are very popular

amongst students and politicians with small

pocket pairs and a penchant for

over playing deuces out of position

causing much consternation and disenchantment among

people who use many big words.

they just couldnt understand simple terminology

,disestablishmentarianism is big in llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwyll-llantysiliogogogoch said

Sark in one of his posts.

which all tend to be off

on a tangent, which is so

weird to grasp when you are

falling off a very high cliff

while viewing the forum on a

large plasma screen at the bottom

of that very high cliff, and

using a giant mouse to navigate

through ruddy windows error messages after

downloading 18,000 songs performed by oasis

drinking softies performing at a karaoke

charity party in aid of giant

housebound poker players who need meals

on wheels to deliver chicken crisps

and beef stew with dumplings on

a bed of mashed potatoes,desert

trolley only available to those living

,as dead people dont eat pudding

which is just as well because

colchester kev ate most of them.

Blueberries, blackberries, loganberries, gooseberries, raspberries and

cranberries are all among my favourite

berries.in fact dangleberries are the

initial point of contact when the

something and the something become outrageously

somethinged by something else. Berries aside

the word: "something" is very important

, without it there would be no

proper way to express an unknown

thing.  Also, many top tunes would

have something missing, the beatles had

many good songs, but something was

a george harrison penned pile of

raspberry coulis on a bed of

crushed meringue and ice cream.  Yum.

You're asking me will my love

have something special about them or

I don't know, I don't know.

much about history, don't know much

much ado about nothing, bugger all

about poker, especially texas hold em

Seat four is the button, small

poket pairs cannot lose if your

desire mirrors tony gs enthusiasm for

helping old ladies cross the road

during heavy traffic and road works

then leaving them alone right at

the spot where jimmy hoffa was

practicing a handbrake turn in his

Hoffamobile. Fortunately for all concerned, the

Mafia written waranty was only valid

little old ladies are very astute

at spotting belated six word entries

unlike claw who needs to go

to the lav for secret ciggies

and clandestine meetings with barry scott

but you wait for the singing

you will need your earplugs and

and anti sickness pills , but remember

to take them well in advance

of undergoing any major surgery on

mondays or thursdays,fridays are usually

ok for amputations but dont expect

a lot of ether you drug

baron from columbia with connections in

hippy trafficing. Peace, love and Duran

duran,he also had a penchant

for Leonard Leonard who fought against

franco in the spanish civil war.

so get on the helter skelter

charles manson and sharpen up youre

appearance, gotta look good in court!!

so ditch the beard and put

aside homicidal feelings of rage until

after the trial, then you can

rage about bad beats and outdraws

if you want, on the other

side of town humpty dumpty fell

,after drinking fifteen pints of guinness.

which was less than the tank

usually manages on a Monday lunchtime

schaddup, I wanna tell you schumthing

so listen up, kellogs plan to

open another hospital for the treatment

of spoon related injuries, the dish

of specialk traumatised 1 person so

much that they could no longer

lose 3lbs a week and attacked

where tesco bake their chocolate muffins

and jammy doughnuts.  There was carnage

when Weight Watchers was kicking out

and slimmers world had riots of

unprecedented violence as would-be skinny people

rushed to buy tight t-shirts and

lycra cycling shorts but good job

there was a sale on underwear

tied up with a black velvet

rope, specially designed for situations where

her eyes were shining like diamonds

that had been caught by the

Queen of the Land. Her hair

on her legs was longer than

Bainn's beard, which is pretty long

it ended up in Van Dieman's

chest hair which is pretty scary

almost as scary as the big

dirty old town. I kissed my

arse goodbye that night when I

chopped you down, like an old

carrot in my kitchen which I

sent homewards, to think again. You

rabbit feeding son of a seed.

Let the wind and the hail

blow down the house of cards

and let the snow come tumbling

down, tumbling down, i feel the

snow covering the whole of Scotland.

Even the bonnie bonnie banks of

Scotland the RBS and other banks.

Like BoS and TSB, both taken

by surprise when confronted with small

squirrels. We had one million bags

containing hazlenuts and shiny pound coins

which we exchanged for magic mushrooms

. We had sailed seven years when

when p&o finally found the port

we'd already drunk all the sherry

so we started on the liquid

nitrogen. The measles broke out, and

the jolly roger looked like a

good enough flag as any to

scare off 18-30 cruiseliners, and rowdy

karoke loving online poker players heading

for the bemuda triangle to play

in the live finals of the

S.S.P.T.

Nickity nackety nu nu nu

which is tankspeak for six word

five word four word three word

two word one hold em championships.

Cats are crawling, on their feet

toward a strange sound in the

Hamnmersmith and City line. Rumble rumble

went their little furry tummies as

the sweaty harbinger of death loomed

over them, dangling sweet morsels of

herring as the collosal tube train

suffered a techincal fault leaving hundreds

of passangers to party like its

their birthday.  A sharp screech indicated

that zack and kelly were late

once again, but that bell saved

Mr Belding from smacking everyones botty

with his slipper which smelled of

cinderella after jogging through china town

, topping tourists like dominoes as she

pursued her mingin' seeeeestas. AC Slater

was dreaming of hulk hogan untill

he grew an extra limb where

he arose sharply, dripping with Hulka-manic

beads of perspiration and heaving a

truck. The trucker driver-ing the trucky

was having a problem aiming his

truck towards the truck stop. Trucks

are good.  Truck drivers like Yorkies.

The biggest truck in truck monthly

wasn't a truck but a Lorry

which was lorrific news for truck

hating lorry lovers the world over.

I saw a convoy of trucks

in a film in the 80s

called: my truck is a duck

that is made of rubber.  Goodnight

and godbless to those crazy truckers

trucking from sea to shining sea

eating their yorkies and bumming around

like the bus driving dancers of

truck truck truck truck trucktruck. A

lot of trucks in one sentance.

but remember: "in god we truck"   ;hide;   sighh, so bad

,but what about agnostic truckers ? the

conflict of interest for them is

runs deep, some feel they are

selfish in their consumption of jellybabies

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v497/Clazabelle24/jellybabies.jpg)

 rotflmfao rotflmfao rotflmfao rotflmfao rotflmfao rotflmfao

bolt appeared to be having some

problems with  his ford ka. the

engine sounded like a little baby

pooing inside an echo chamber.he

decided not to bother driving and

just phone his chauffer instead.jeeves

unfortunately was suffering from a bad

hangover,so he turned to his

trusty truck. Even that yielded no

help, that left only one option

- to brave the train.  He prepared

his goggles, stopwatch and notebook. Everything

was sound untill a truck came

and then all my loving was

saved for the exhaust pipe but

ready for action, I wished that

I had remembered the ky.  Never

it was busy playing ring-a-ring-a rosies

with a rugby team from bristol.

The concrete and the clay beneath

the random word generator was clogging

the exhaust, so we took twenty

strapping  young rugby players and told

them to have a big ruck over

misspelling of the word truck, they

all agreed that was yesterdays thing

untill truckers digest announced: all trucks

are to be recalled, pending investagatory

inspection into exhaust abuse by scottish

push bot with an addictive personailty   ;goodvevil;

singing Nickety Nackety nu nu nu

nu nu nu, nu nu nu

If I could, I'd build a

facility for genetically modified potatoes and

a wall all round of Donnegal

with magic fairy's sprinkling fairy dust

or thats what they call it

in childrens stories, elswere its known

as forty notes a gram. The

price charged for sub standard cheesburgers

from Burger King was out of

line with inflation, so several customers

stripped naked and told the manager

they wanted cheese on their Whopper

the manager, however disgusted, obliged and

didn't even contest their Whopper status

even though it was clear that

they would be better described as

McMinis. Donkey rides on Blackpool Beach

and looks out at the polluted

society which we inhabitat. Murderers, thieves

and all the other good folk

who come to ride the donkeys

but get banned because they jump

start trucks along the promenade when

the donkeys are trying to fight

small children for their buckets and

its all kicking off, the police

are performing Roxanne on the pier

when a donkey kicks sting in

his left buttock, leaving an imprint

but doing no lasting harm. An

impromptu game of boules was starting

for one buttocked pop kings like

Gary Glitter after the operation.  Simon

and Garfunkel sang Barbie girl like

two dudes who were out of

their minds with worry, all the

time monitoring secret squirrels operation and

discovering nothing due to the security

breach in sector 7g the enterprise

which acted as a useful diversion

looked like a tube of toothpaste

lying in the gutter, forgotten by

the david bowie fans that had

long since gone home to drink

diluted toothpaste with soap and vodka

mixed in with their bedtime horlicks.

terence trent derby shouted at bob

the builder to fix his braids

"sign your name across this contract"

i want you to be my

odd job and minor repairs man

,my last one resigned, claiming sexual

feelings towards me which he couldn't

express as he'd lost his medication

back in Suffragette city. Don't lean

on me man - he's got arthritis

just like the Queen. Alarming levels

of the smiths were being played

whilst outside the bells were ringing,

out for Christmas Day. You're a

scumbag, there all scumbags over there

in that chip shop where elvis was

reportedly bitten by a rabid hedgehog.

sonic rolled down to the brothel

and accidentally pricked a whore with

his front elbow. He apologised profusely

and asked if there was anywhere

One of such prickly orientation could

lighten his load.  A friendly madam

showed him a nice cheese grater

and led him to a private

investigator that had been following bob

carolgees' career with great interest.  He

had that look in his eye

and a tub of bone grease

in his 6 word story that

was starting to smell a bit

he did the shake and vac

to put the freshness back but

he was distracted by britney spears

. This post didn't take an hour  ;tk;

there was a young man from

the wrong side of town who

wanted to live on the right

side of the law, except he

kept on stealing socks from primarks

and nicking CDs from the library.

because his bag wasnt big to

to fit wooly jumpers in so

he had to wear them on

his bad boy bump spree. Bingo

is a game of chance and

anyone who plays it regularly will

die of boredom within three sessions

"no they won't bingo's great" said

some deranged lunatic drinking super tennants

and eating chocolate hob nobs from

dusk till dawn and shouting aloud:

"For the love of God, please

put down the pot noodle and

p p p pick up a

stray cat and take it to

the cleaners.  I love the smell

of freshly cut roses taken from

old man Tikay's favourite flower bed.

tikay said "why the fuck dont.............

leave my flowers alone and get

a tetnus shot after stepping on

that rusty nail in his fence

that had been left protruding by

an osvaldo ardiles curling free kick

in the cup for Totting ham.

where they beat Man U in

the most one sided game ever

since claw whooped kinboshi heads up.

And where Duke managed to stay

in his kennel with his bone

Kept firmly under control.  Madasahatstand went

crazy at the thought of bones

and decided to pay a visit

to the moon and back again

. While she was there she saw

Saw, then Saw Two & Three

then she saw some more saw

understandable, three top quality movie productions

rivalled only by Police Academy and

debbie does dallas, and vegas, and....

debbie gets into a lot of

trouble when the Vatican let her

trouble when the  Aspades comes on

grrr - why has it stoped warning me when people have posted!?!?!?!?!

rewrite the book of Leviticus so

it becomes law to have huge