blonde poker forum

If you could host a dinner for any five people, dead or alive, who would they be and why?

1.Thomas Edison...I'd ask him about his unfinished inventions, patent them, market them and make millions

2 Einstein ..........Along with Newton one of the icons of physics. His special and general theories of relativity revolutionised scince.

3. Plato.............One of the eminent philospohers of classical greece, his writings of 2400 years ago still debated by eminent scholars to this day

4. Nostradamus.....he could probably help with those marginal call or pass situations

5. Keira Knightley.. for her intellect too. If she was unavailable I'd settle for Jessica Alba. She's clever too

Had to take the dogs out for a walk to think about this one - they were pleased, but it's cold enough to take one's nips off out there.

Right then!

1. My sister Jane, there's an awful lot of things I had to say to her before she died, and while I have said them to her since she's been gone - I'd like the chance to actually say them to her properly. Most of all I want a big hug off my big sister.

2. My maternal Grandmother, Sarah - I never got to meet her, and I have an awful lot of questions to ask her - not least of which how my Grandfather was a monk! She was also a mean card player apparently. She's the link to my heritage I have never been able to broach.

3. John Belushi - he'd be a blast at any dinner party - I'd like him to have a good talk to my sister as well - they have a lot in common. I wouldn't serve mashed potato though.

4. Benny Binion - for the tales about Vegas - what he thinks of Vegas now, and whether he really did half the things that have been attributed to him. Between him and my Grandmother, there would be a hell of a card game I expect.

5. Charles Fort - father of Forteana - a rather unconvential Victorian gentleman, who thought outside the box, had a great moustache, and would be right at home with my eccentricities.

1,   Martin Luther King
  I think he would be intresting especially to have a one on one convorsation with quest no2

2, Adolf Hitler,
 would love to speak with him and see what he was like, if he look evil and spoke evil etc... and see how he acts with no1

3,  billy connelly   funniest man in the world and would bring  a bit of humor to the table

4, Jessica Simpson,  no reason needed

5,   Ks Henrik Larsson,  no reason needed

This wouldn't so much be a dinner party as a council of war. Blair & Bush would need to watch out.


Bill Hicks - opinionated, sarcastic, and prone to speaking his mind. Also funny as hell.

Che Guevara - With him & Hicks in the room that would be the revolution started, then and there.

Bobby Sands - Poet, singer & willing to fight & die for his beliefs.

John Knox - Another willing to fight for his right to self-determination and against abuse of privilege.

Oliver Cromwell - tyrant or martyr (according to which history you listen to) but by all accounts one of the few with the integrity to hand back ultimate power when he held it.


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Serving at the table.....

The original Daisy Duke (as she was then).
A young Sofia Loren
Heid's niece ;)

come on RED DOG you know we are all waiting     :)up

well, I sort of did have Red (and a couple of others) in mind when I started this, but he's In Blackpool..so patience!

tough question. though about posing it myself but couldn't come up with my own. Here's five but I'll probably think of others I wish I'd gone for later
Mohamed Ali
Bruce Lee
Ghandi
Denis Leary
Adolf Hitler (inspired by Johnlarsson earlier, I have questions for him >:( )

1. Henry VIII - I always put out too much food at these things, everyone thinking it's rude to do more than just nibble. This guy would have all my other guests feeling like it's ok to munch as much as they want.

2. Sean Connery - I've always wondered if I'd be able to resist the temptation to do a mock up of his accent if I ever met him.

3. Janis Joplin - Party chick, she'll have some fun ideas of what to do after the meal. Also, I've always wanted to know if she really did kill herself, I'm not convinced because apparently she had an unopened packet of cigarettes on her person when she died. They were bought from the hotel vending machine. Any smoker knows you don't buy from those packet of 16 rip-off things unless you really need them and intend to smoke them.

4. Raymond Albet Kroc - The founder of Mcdonalds Restraunts Ltd. Show him what REAL food tastes like.

5. Felicity Kendall - In her younger days in those dungarees, mucking out the pigs. mmmm

I think history speaks for itself here, not only did he decimate half of the population of Ireland, he defaced most of the churches in Britain

That still leaves me undecided

lol

for me it would be

(1) gordon ramsay, cos at least dinner would be nice

(2) Phil Helmuth cos he will flip out when he gets less chips than everyone else.

(3) Bill Gates 9 cos he could afford the entry fee of £200,0000 ( quickest way I can think of getting a good bankroll)
 
(4) Rod paradise ( just so i can berade him for calling an all in with A 4 os. )

(5) Angelina Jolie, cos she's a fox and you need something to drool over.

My Dad. But only if he's sober and not dead anymore.

Miles Hunt. Lead singer of the Wonder Stuff who wasted a chance at becoming as big as U2 became.

Jenna Jameson. Have admired her work for a number of years now.

Jeremy Clarkson. Genius. I agree with nearly everything he says.

Steven Fry. Genius and must have a million anecdotes.

History was written by the winners though.

Cromwell spent a total of 9 months in Ireland - he'd have to have tanks to kill half the population. He also executed Black Tom Tyrant (the man sent from England by Charles the 1st to forcably convert the Irish catholics & to prevent Irish trade costing England).

I'm not going to go too far into it - but from some reading I've done Cromwell was an example of a good leader who held his men back from excesses where he could. His being demonised would have been a huge help to the Royalists & rulers who were rightly scared of the power of the masses. Spin doctoring.

1) Jim Morrison
2) John Lennon
3) Albert Einstein
4) Napoleon Bonepart
5) Admiral Horatio Nelson  (The last two to provide after dinner entertainment)

The reason behind inviting these five figures wouldnt be for any intellectual conversation or after dinner music and entertaining but because they have all sadly passed away therefore leaving greedy monkey to enjoy 6 helpings of banana stew!!!  :D

Wow, great thread, but I'm struggling to limit it to 5.

OK, here's my first stab - I fancy I'm gonna change it a few times though.

The first 3 will not change though.

My late Dad. Such as I've achieved anything in life, it's all been since he died. He'd have been so proud. Of what, in my own little way, Ive achieved, & how I conduct myself.

My Aunty Doris, who, from when I was 6 months old, was really my Mum. I had a step-mum later, but let's not go there. Aunt dioris died this year, 90 years old. The woman who never, ever, let me down.

Isambard Kingdom Brunel. Arguably, in technical terms, the greatest Englishman who ever lived.

Crick & Watson (they count as one), who were credited, slighgtly unfairly, with the discovery of DNA.Two quite extrardinary guys.

Now, the fifth. Hmm. Churchill? Phil Bulll? The Hon George Lambton? David Attenborough? Howard Hughes? Sir Nigel Gresley? Jeffrey Archer? Eminem? John Kirkland, OBE? Papillon (I forget his real name). Jeex, this is diffiucult. I'll have to think more before deciding. I am sure there are dozens more to add to the "short list".

What a bloody good question.

ah'm a cogitatin...

It is a great Q, it's been posed in the past and some of my guests have already ben taken. Two remaining from my list, which was not restricted to 5, include Victor Borge and Peter Ustinov.

Is this your attempt to try and look "hip" and "with it" towards all the younger generation of Blondites? :o

i know

i know

 :redcard:

 ;)

for reasons

1. Leonardo da vinci..as an inventor to hear what he thinks about todays world
2. Charles Darwin...to hear what he thinks about the american creationists
3. ghandi....a visionary
4. J edgar Hoover...man of many secrets and most of them went with him..
5. Jesus ...well if he turns up a few folks nose is gonna be out of joint
there are loads of others

No, I'm a big fan of Mr Mathers. But for you older guys, add Steven Tyler (Aerosmith) & Robert Smith (The Cure).

Victor Borge? GOOD pick!

Ustinov and Steven Fry are corking picks too


funny isn't it, the question was posed two weeks ago, and only now it's coming to life! Strange!!!

I would invite


Elvis Presley
Guy Gibson (Squadron leader of the dambusters raid)
Anne Frank
Brian Clough
Peter Kay

Steven Fry - yes, superb raconteur. Immensely intelligent, huge IQ, & perfectly mad. Reminds me of our Jen, actually.

Cloughie - that's an interesting one!

Sprung to life after 2 weeks? The Forum has been slightly quieter than usual these last 2 weeks - I believe the Fessies at Blackpool & Walsall are partly the reason. Both Fessies were packed with blondeites, but now we are back home, & catching up.

Yes brillant! he would bring down the house i just love pheonix nights!

Thing is to include him in my list would mean booting Jenna Jameson and well she's really hot and does things you wouldn't believe.

1, My late grandfather who died when my father was a child - family say I have his ways, so he must have been a wonderful person.  :D :D

2, Charlotte Delbo - A wonderful, strong, women who survived Hitlers concentration camps and whose work inspired me enough to be the subject of my undergrad dissertation.

3, Captain Watson of the Sea Shephard - his compassion and commitment to marine mammal protection is amazing - he dedicates his whole life to this cause and I would be honoured to be in his company.

4, Shakespeare - I admire Shakespeares works, but the question of authorship is bugging me now - so I would like to meet him firstly to find out if he did write the wonderful works accredited to him, and if he did then obviously to speak with him about them.

5, Angelina Jolie - because I love her :)

1) Muhammed Ali

2) Bruce Lee

3) Nelson Mandela

4) Gandhi

5) Stephen Hawking

My waitresses would be Jessica Alba, Kiera Knightley and Natalie Portman.

The "why?" is the same for all 5 of them - they are my idols.

1. Clive James - his comedy and travel shows are still amazing.

2. Gus Hansen (genius - madman?) but many stories to tell i'm sure

3. Issac Newton - The most talented person in his century and yet how much could he learn from being in the C21st for only 30 mins?

4. Claire Danes - A perfect Juliet.

5. Jewel - a great singer - (they would not want me to do the Kareokee)

Not perfect, she didn't get her baps out. My interpretation of that shakespeare play was that the author clearly intended Juliet to go topless at some point.

This level of attention to detail - only seen on blonde. Respeck.

how the hell did Eminem, make it into this list? lol

neither a genius or a mad man, just plain old skint!!!!

This is the first of my five, I’m doing them one at a time, it’s too much thinking to do them all at once

I may not be able to stop at five, and there is no order of merit


My little Granddad

My dad’s parents were both quite petite, so we kids we called them our little Granny and Granddad. My mam’s parents were our big Granny and Granddad

My little Granddad ‘Sam’ was one of the most selfless men I have ever known. He never had much money, he didn’t drive, he hardly ever spoke and he was totally illiterate, my Granny used to say, “He can’t tell an A from a bulls foot” but he taught us so many things.

He seemed to thrive on hard work, he was always busy, but he always had time for us. A brilliant carpenter, he would spend hours making us wooden toys or kennels for our dogs, he taught me to make wooden flowers and clothes pegs (Before you can make pegs you have to make a special ‘peg knife’) so he taught me that too

On Sundays he would take us boys for a walk in the countryside, a real walk, 15 miles or so, we used to take a packed lunch. He would always be pointing out things that we didn’t see, bird nests, squirrels, tadpoles etc. Sometimes we would come upon a lake or a river, Granddad would produce some line, make some rods and we would spend the day fishing

The only time I ever saw him inactive was when there was wrestling or a cowboy film on the telly, then he would sit in his caravan, riveted to a tiny black and white portable TV with a 10 inch screen, this was powered by a slim cable connected to a battery outside. God help you if you ran past and “Pulled his wires off” Eventually he bought a portable colour telly. A rare thing in those days and his only extravagance

He died just after I got married. as is often the way I only realised how much I loved him after he had gone, I never told him

He left me his pocket watch, some woodworking tools, a million memories, and his colour telly



This is him on the frontboard of his waggon, the child is my father




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Matt Groening (Rhymes with complaining)

Matt Groening is the creator of 'The Simpsons' and 'Futurama'

These cartoons have topped the ratings for the last 15 years and deservedly so; they work on so many levels, Excruciatingly funny but at the same time a real exploration of the human psyche

Over the years Groening has tackled every subject under the sun in an amusing, yet thought provoking way, and has provided a vehicle for me and countless others to comment upon and discuss issues with my growing family that are difficult to broach under sterile conditions

He is one of life’s great philosophers and humanitarians, capable of passing teaching off as great entertainment. I would love to spend some time in his company


Homer: From now on, there are three ways to do things: the right way, the wrong way, and the Max Power way.
Bart: Isn't that just the wrong way?
Homer: Yeah, but faster!


Lisa: Do we have any food that wasn't brutally slaughtered?
Homer: Well, I think the veal died of loneliness


Homer's Brain: Use reverse psychology.
Homer: Oh, that sounds too complicated.
Homer's Brain: Okay, don't use reverse psychology.
Homer: Okay, I will!


Homer: Okay Marge, its your child against my child. The winner will be showered with praise. The loser will be taunted and booed until my throat is sore



Homer: No offense Apu, but when they're handing out religions you must be out taking a whizz.
Apu: Mr. Simpson, pay for your purchases and get out...and come again



Marge: Homer, I don't want you driving around in a car you built yourself.
Homer: You can sit there complaining, or you can knit me some seat belts.

When anyone next sees Jen (djinn) ask her to do her Simpsons impressions. (Vocal). Nobody does them better. She, like me, & evidently Red-Dog, is a Simpson's geek.

seat 1. mohamed ali
seat 2. richard d james
seat 3. nelson mandela
seat 4. hunter s thompson
seat 5. ghandi

i would have william burroughs and jock stien as subs in case anyone didnt want to come :D

Who are Richard James & Hunter Thompson?

aphex twin and hunter is a writer

"aphex twin". Eh?

Ohh, them ???

ok, mistake was made here, mads list was acctually mine, i forgot  i was on her pc and not my laptop and posted under madas, hunter s thompson was a sports journalist/failed novelist/political commentator, who wrote "fear and loating in las vegas"  he was a 100% rebel who could write like an angel.

richard d james makes music under the moniker of "aphex twin" musuc that sounds like no one elses, everything from hard drum n bass to full orchestral masterpieces that mozart would be proud of.

Thanks RED-DOG.

 I have always enjoyed both the Simpsons and Futurama. South Park is also more than worthy of mention here. These are are pieces that perform their primary function of entertainment with incredible success and also manage to express to the masses the most basic of human feelings and point us in the general direction of decency.

Most of all tho', those guys are really funny!

1. Sir Donald Bradman, certainly the greatest cricketer of all time and one of the world's greatest sportsmen from a bygone age.

2. Muhammed Ali as he was when he fought George Foreman. Ali was my absolute favourite sportsman when I was a kid.

3. Ian Botham who I am certain was kidnapped as a child from Sydney and spirited away to England. How else could he play like that?

4. Douglas Adams who could explain to everyone the theory behind the impossibility drive in space ships.

5. Dr Who so I could borrow his Time Machine. Can you imagine what fun you could have with that sucker.

I'm not sure what kind of dinner that would make but while they were all talking I would be off in the time machine doing whatever I wanted and be back 1 second later and no-one would be the wiser.

I always wanted to go back to 2 time periods, the first to the time of Christ to see for my own eyes what was really happening and 2nd to a time when prehistoric man roamed the earth playing his own version of poker. Oh yeah, I also wanted to go back to when Bill Gates was very young and offer to back him for a 25% stake in Microsoft.

I went forward in time to get tomorrows newspaper, I turned to the horse results section and read the headline, "all racing cancelled due to fog" gutted.

I went forward in time to get tomorrows newspaper, I turned to the horse results section and read the headline, "all racing cancelled due to fog" gutted.
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That was your first mistake you were thinking short term and small time, what you wanted to do was go 2 weeks in to the future and get 2 weeks of the FT, then come back and make a killing on the stock market. now thats what you shoulda done!

lottery numbers?

even better, but winning a fortnight of lottery's would be a bit fishy.

Greedy Bassa - one good win's enough for any man!  :D

Bump as I'm waiting for the rest of Red's - I mioght think my guests through well, but can't explain them as well as Red does his.