blonde poker forum

Selling Telling it like it is.


I would like to play the £550 Deepstack at DTD this weekend but would need to sell 60% at 1.2

5% = £33
10% = £66

If I sell out, I will be playing on Saturday.
 
All monies to be paid by 12 noon on Saturday unless I know you and we make other arrangements.


Before investing, please see pros and cons listed below.

Con: I’m not worth 1.2

Pro: I will pay all travel / food expenses.

Pro:  I will not be treating Vinny to a Nando’s.

Con: I haven’t played a great deal of live poker recently.

Pro: I cashed in the last comp I played at DTD.

Con: We probably won’t win anything.

Pro: I secretly think we will.

Pro: I won’t feel any added pressure because people have invested.

Con: I lied about not feeling added pressure.

Pro: If I win one of the included £1100 seats, buyers will be free rolling that event at the same percentages.

Thanks for reading.

PS- I already have a perfectly serviceable arse, please don’t tear me a new one.

Will we get a proper Tourney Report?

That depends what you call proper. Will you accept stuff like, "I re raised but a bloke moved all in with a bald head and a sovereign ring"?

That's the ONLY sort I'll accept.

Ideally, this sort of thing.....


http://blondepoker.com/forum/index.php?topic=30601.0

A shame that thread went so badly downhill subsequently.

10%, please.

Booked. Thank you.

Had I the money...

However, good though the Brighton report was, the Walsall one was better, on so many levels.

10% please Tom. I'm at Dusk tonight if your there for cash or I can ship via Bank

Having won the LilD dart pool on stakesandladders.com I shall spin it up with 15% of you Red!!

Am there for Sunday already but if you pm me bank deets will transfer this arvo

Tom at Dtd tonight for cash will gladly give 5% but if you are not there let it go mate

Sale cancelled.

Tony's fault.

Details to follow.....

Sigh

:(

First of all, Thanks very much to everyone who offered to buy a piece. I really appreciate it.

I posted a similar version of this thread last night at about 3am, then I went to bed.

I few minutes later, I got up and removed it. I just didn't feel comfortable about it.

This morning, I re wrote it and posted it again. I still didn't feel comfortable about it and I almost took it down again but I decided to let it stay because really want to play tomorrow.

Anyway, why should I worry? No one is twisting anyone's arm, all the details are up front and everyone knows what they are getting.

Still. I wasn't comfortable.

Then, Tony popped up, bought a piece and the die was cast. I closed my laptop and went outside to dig a trench. As you do.

Mrs Red aside, Tony is probably my best friend in the world. He's also a very wise old bird, so wise in fact that I often spend several days pondering on what he says and why he said it.

So as I dug my trench I mused about his request for a "Proper tourney report". Why did he ask for that? Slowly the answer dawned on me.

See he knows that I can't justify selling at a mark up of 1.2, so offering something in addition, (like an amusing tournament report) would sugar the pill.

Now I know why I was feeling bad.

I just don't really want to sell at a price I don't believe I deserve. I didn't like it when I did it a couple of years ago (Horseshit sandwich), and I don't like it now. No matter how I dress it up, it just doesn't sit right with me.

So. I'm cancelling the sale.

There. I really do feel so much better now.

 

 

Daft old bugger.

Will you sell me a bit @ 0.8 then?

Good man. It's a funny old world poker. In most other things, we just tailor our expectations/desires to our means. It's real life and it is good.

Will take 20 at 1.0.  If you sell 60 at this price, your cost will be the same.  Nobody ever felt guilty at selling at 1.0.  Good luck.

Ditto the above from me as well

15% at 1.0 if you change your mind!

Thanks. (Your maths seem wrong btw, I was selling 60 at 1.2 so selling 60 at 1.0 can't be the same can it? (Please let it be the same).

First of all I need to ask the original buyers if they want to stand on at 1.0

If they do it will mean that 40% has gone.

In a fit of manliness and self belief, I have decided that I should keep 50% of myself. You are very welcome to the remaining 10%.

Am happy with 15 or 20 Tom just let me know and happy to chop mine exactly with Doobs 10% so if I have 15% we both get 12.5 just let me know itt and pm me bank deets

And run good obv ;)

Any left tom ?

I would of bought at 1.2 anyway
Will take 10% if any

You're still selling the same amount Tom it's just that the 40% that you keep yourself will cost you more.

Selling 60% at 1.2 means the punters pay £396 and you pay £154

Selling 60% at 1.0 means the punters pay £330 and you pay £220

Either way the payouts are the same. (Fuck all!!)

Argh!

This is fast becoming the most confusing staking thread ever. Why do I always make simple things complicated?


This is how I think we stand at the moment.

Tony - 10% (I'll take a chance and say he's confirmed).

redsimon - 10% Confirmed.

flushthemout - 5%

Eso Kral - 15% confirmed.

Doobs - 10% Confirmed.

Yeah, but he said my costs would be the same. Do keep up Matt. and stop insulting me in minuscule print.

Thanks Lee. If there's any left you're welcome to it.

I was confirming that you were right nob 'ed

I've been thinking about it some more Rich, and what it boils down to is this.

If I could say "I'm selling 50% at 1.2 but I'll be playing regardless" then the mark up wouldn't worry me, but saying in essence."If you don't buy I can't play" is kind of exploiting people's good nature.

Do you see what I mean?

Yes. I wasn't criticising, just you were getting het up about things that most wouldn't even concern themselves with.

Which is good, but not if it stresses you.

confirmed, pm bank if you're not at dusk tonight and ill ship it over AM Saturday

Cheers Simon. I'll PM soon.

I'll take 5% Tom. Would really like to see you play and do well in this.

the reason you are selling if not to mitigate some variance whilst providing a good value deal for others is because you cant afford to play otherwise.


i'd much prefer to see someone acknowledge that than say yeh i'm playing 1 drop obv playing whatever but if you want you can buy at 1.ridiculous


Everyone on the staking board has to make their own value judgements and if many people who know you in person are willing to pay 1.2 then reduce some of your own outlay as 550 is a big tournament. The fact you umm and arrrr over the morality is a positive towards people wanting to back you. You are offering a lower mu here than by selling 100% and keeping X% of yourself.


GL if you play, make sure to cooler people and win flips.

I think I'm sold out, pending conformation Alex, but thanks all the same.

It's brave of you to have a punt considering my performance the last time we shared a table. I must have looked like the weakest player in the world.

I was cringing with embarrassment, passing hand after hand to your raises for hour upon hour, but I couldn't do anything else. I was dying to play back at you but I was totally card dead and I needed a proper hand because the guy to my left in seat one never passed a single time. Not once.

I was mightily impressed by your performance though.

I was going to write a piece comparing the Alex of 3 or 4 years ago to the Alex of today, but I decided against it in the end because I would have been overly rude on the one hand and more complimentary than is seemly on the other.

I bet those 3 or 4 years seem like ages to you. For me they've slipped by in the twinkling on an eye.

Good luck on your travels. Don't be a stranger.

Sorry thought you were selling 50 at 1.2.  Will take the 10.  Please send bank details.  Thanks

When I played the UKPC I took a jacket especially for putting on when I was all in.

It worked 3 times on day 1 and then like a fool I forgot to bring the bloody thing on day 2.

Thanks Doobs.

pfttttt amateur :p

too much contemplating itt! you playing or what? :-)

I reckon so.

You?

yes tomorrow. see you there!

Not been this confused since I read an Alex Martin post on the PHA.

;goodluck; Tom!

Tom,

Happy to take my 10%, but if you don't mind, & he does not mind, I'll split it 50/50 with Alex.

Either way, 10% if available, please.

I still want a Tourney Report though.

Is this a RSQ?

Confirmed.

I'm not doing a tourney report now though. I've gone all self concious and it will come out all contrived and stilted.

Flushthenout said, "Tom at Dtd tonight for cash will gladly give 5% but if you are not there let it go mate"

He hasn't been back on, and he said I was to let it go if I wasn't at DTD tonight, so that's what I will do.

I guess I ought to offer his 5% to leethefish because he asked first.

 

Hi Lee,

I offered Alex half of my 10%, but never noticed you had asked first. Sorry.

You can have half of my 10% if Alex does not take up the offer.

If he does take it up, you can have my 5%.

Hope that makes sense. Just confirm either way, and we can sort the money out in the morning.

Lol. See my previous post.

Proper farce this.

All this demand at 1.0. Should've sold at mark up

You have to, it is a condition of purchase.

This is all your fault anyway.

There is a spare 5% for Lee if he wants it.

Yes please at 5 % please let me know where I gotta send to red

It was a condition of purchase at markup price. that is no longer the case, especially now that you've whipped everyone up into a frenzy of expectation.

Anyway, I can't write anything good lately. Go and look at my diary if you don't believe me.

Am pissed right now will send tomorrow !!

Cheers Lee.

Im confused, how much is my 10% in Sterling :D

Grim incoming IMO.

(http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-zvAi48CvkvE/UOtT-56PFQI/AAAAAAAAAHQ/hCF8mHl_P2w/s640/5871335_large%5B1%5D.jpg)

Don't you start.

I've no idea how much I owe Tom now lol

Eso has let me on 5% of his so I'm on board too yay! Good luck Tom.

Best of blonde. I was confused why a staking thread had hit 5 pages without a ball being bowled but this has been fun to catch up on! Hope you get the lot!

(http://stream1.gifsoup.com/webroot/animatedgifs5/4290954_o.gif)

Got there in the end. Gl Tom.

There is just one more thing that I want to get off my chest before tomorrow.

The last time I played poker at DTD, I went on tilt.

“But you don’t go on tilt” I hear you cry, well ask Evilpie or Chili if you don't believe me. They were on the receiving end of my rants during the breaks,

On my table there was a bloke sitting opposite me who looked exactly like Hank from Breaking Bad. He looked like him, but there the similarity ended. Breaking Bad Hank was worldly wise, thoughtful and shrewd. My Hank was as nutty as squirrel shit.

When it was his turn to act, he would slide his bum off his chair and sink towards the floor until his nose was level with the edge of the table, then he would close one eye and spy at each player in turn. During this performance he would purse his lips in an exaggerated fashion, like he was trying to have a shave while sucking on a particularly tart sherbet lemon.

Blinds 50 / 100, I made it 275 to go with AKos from mid position. Hank gave me the full scootch-down, one eyed stare treatment and called my bet, giggling like a Japanese schoolgirl.

The flop came AKx two hearts. I bet 550.

Hank spent 30 seconds or so rehearsing for an upcoming gurning contest, and then he called.

What could I put him on here? AJ, KJ, KQ, a flush draw…?

The turn was a nice safe black 8, I bet 1400 and he called quickly. Somewhere in the back of my mind, a little alarm bell started ringing.

The river card was the 7 of hearts.

Fuck! Now what?

I had a bit of a think and decided that there was no point in me betting again here, I would simply be inflating a pot that I was no longer sure I was ahead in, so I decided to check-call.

I checked and he insta bet 5000.

I wanted to call, I really did, but when I looked across at him he had gone back to gurning and spying at me from table level,

It dawned on me that he just couldn’t be bluffing. He wasn’t capable, he didn’t have a bluff in him. With a soft sigh, I threw my cards in to the muck.

He raked the pot towards him, flipping over 8 10 of clubs as he did so.

“Dingleberries” he explained, pointing to his cards. “They never lose….  What did you have by the way?”

Christ! I'm such an idiot. how can I even contemplate passing top two here?

I shrugged the hand off. I pride myself on the fact that I never get tilted at the poker table.

Hank pursed his lips and giggled like Lucy Liu on helium. Looking at me with one eye closed he whispered, “Dingleberries.”

I smiled at him, shattering one of my molars in the process.

Unfortunately, there was worse to come…..

More stories please <3

They are very well written and had me in absolute stitches :)

gl

dat giffff <3

i'm all

(http://i1112.photobucket.com/albums/k497/animalsbeingdicks/ngmePgF.gif)


watching that gif.

Lol. The more I look at it, the funnier it gets. WTF is going on?

Some crazy Japanese game show. Something to do with getting marshmallows whilst wearing tights on your face. <3 google/youtube

YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=29K-W6mM7X8

Best of blonde. In fact, if you go and ship it this weekend thisccould be the best thread ever on blonde.

Dingleberries :D

U have to win just so Barry carter can use the poker headline "dog wins poker tournament"

Thread title states "Sale Cancelled".

So are you playing, or is the whole thread a level?

Ridic. Utterly ridic.

Be fair Tikay. only mods can alter titles the days

oh

wait



great story though Red. Run well, play good. Write more.

I may withdraw my offer to buy.

Or maybe I could re-sell it at 1.2?

This has grim written all over it!
OP is clearly on the make.
Absolute farce.

Dingleberries!

So far, one of my investors has sent the pre conscience attack, 1.2 amount. One has sent the correct 1.0 amount with a note saying "I think I've sent the wrong amount" and one has written to say he has absolutely no idea how much to send.

Sent to bank and sent you a pm ;)

Thanks Rich.

Hahahaha!

Someone sent me the correct, 1.0 amount, but has also added the money he was going to spend buying dinner for Celtic.

I can't tell you how happy that makes me.

Sent Tom good luck

Thought I'd have a little nosy on here, see what's going on.
You know those situations when people are so daft it's kind of endearing?

This isn't one of them.  ;dingdell;

Good luck Dad!
See you on Thursday xxxx

Presumably we all have to buy Celtic dinner when you win this?

I am somehow always reminded of Tom when I watch Peter in "Family Guy".


YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CX4cGhQW5Ec

I'll buy everyone dinner if Tom wins this! 😀

Good luck all.

8 million quid?

After my initial clash with Hank, I made a conscious effort to regain my composure, which would have been easier if he hadn’t won every pot he played. (Is it just me, or does everyone hate to see smug players win chips?)

Anyway, during the next couple of orbits, I slowly unclenched my teeth, my fists and my buttocks. Then I picked up AKos again.

The blinds were 100 200. I opened for 600 from mid position and got one caller. I’ll let you guess who it was.

Amazingly, or perhaps predictably, I flopped top two again. AKx. One spade, two dingleberries.

I bet 1375.

When I don’t want to look at someone at the poker table, I just cast my eyes down and stare at the felt. It didn’t work this time, because that’s where Hank’s face was.

I hadn’t actually looked at Hank, rather he had manoeuvred his head until it was directly beneath my gaze. “You know what I’m going for don’t you?” he tittered. “I call”.

The turn brought the third club.

“Dingleberry!” Cried Hank.

“Bollocks” I whispered to myself as a horrible sense of deja vu swept over me. I felt like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day. At least he had Andie MacDowell to look at. All I had was Hank.

This time I was sure beyond any doubt that he had made his flush. I had a slim re-draw, but I wasn’t putting another cold farthing into that pot unless I housed up.

I checked and Hank checked behind me. The river was a brick.

I checked expecting hank to make a milking bet. I had already decided I wasn’t calling.

“All in” Hank shouted loudly, pushing all his chips over the line in a big over bet.

I flicked my cards towards the muck, but for some reason they seemed to have become stuck to my fingers.

Why had he checked the turn?

I tried to say pass, but only a croak came out.

Why had he bet so much on the river…

I looked again at Hank. I just couldn’t bear the thought of him flipping over a bag of bollocks and giggling at me as he raked another pot   

I heard myself saying, “Call”

He turned over A 2 of clubs.

“Dingleberries.  tee hee.”

Under the circumstances, I was quite restrained. Restricting myself to tearing out a relatively small clump of my hair.

Even so, I probably shouldn’t have bothered with a re-load……

So sorry Tom on late response, was at dtd till 4.30am (getting the lot in cash) got in at 5.15am straight up the apples then to watch the Mighty St Andrews win 1-0 in the quaterfinal of the FA Vase i was there at 8am this morning as i am directly involved with the club and just got in and read the thread as i thought it was Cancelled Sale, No problem just want to let you know the reasons for no response, Please dont win, Gl Mate

Tom has 70,000 at 400-800


He asked for this. Morale reasons.

(https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-DnXkkQVEctQ/UxuWZ2Y_RWI/AAAAAAAAkck/v98v30UI89A/w287-h429-no/DSC05139.JPG)

(http://i3.mirror.co.uk/incoming/article1503976.ece/ALTERNATES/s615b/%C2%A3%C2%A3%C2%A3Fee%20for%20use%20Jenny%20Agutter-1503976)

How on earth has he gathered that many chips? Never been known.

Must have been on the dingleberry home-brew.

86300 according to the DTD website.   Great stuff.  Go Tom

Well that's just ridiculous.

He's never had that many in his life, even back in the day when he was a half decent player.

We need Dingleberry Bloke to sort him out.

Best of luck today Tom, may the dingleberries be with you.

Good luck Dawg

Good luck!

(http://i24.photobucket.com/albums/c17/JCtheMessiah/dingleberries-are-fun.jpg)

Good luck!

Good luck to the Dingleberry firm!

Good luck Red, but dem dingles to sleep.

Good luck Mr. Tom!

Thanks guys.

Yesterday We tried to play sensible, small ball poker. I know that dick waving contests are exciting, but when you get to my age, it's very hard to recover from a slap round the chops from a flying knob end.

That being said, today is a different kettle of fish. If we're going to do any good, we have to to set the risk lever to 'High'.

GL us.

Good luck Tom, get it won. If at first you don't succeed, try, try, try again! Or as the kids say these days, stick it in their eye...

When I said knob end btw, I wasn't being disrespectful, I was being metaphorical.

Congrats on the cash, Tom, I know you'll be chuffed to bits, the responsibility of investors weighs heavily on you, I fancy.

Now you can turn that risk-o-meter up, and go for it.

Good luck.

Am working tonight, from 7pm, but will find a way to follow your progress.

Good run Tom ul  ending had a gut feeling u would do well, good to see you back at DTD, shame I didn't see you Friday

1.2 would have been good value, dingleberries aside.

Thanks very much for the stake everyone.

I've shipped to tikay and redsimon, and I paid Eso at the venue. (He will pay Alex for me).

Need details for Lee and Doobs please.

pm sent
well done and ul mate

received, wp Tom

Well done Tom! Unlucky on the exit hand though...

Enjoyed the sweat.

Laughed very hard indeed. TY Tikay. WP Tom.

I think everyone is weighed in now, except perhaps leethefish. I shipped his dosh but got a message saying, "Your payment may not have been successful".

If that is the case, he will contact me and I'll sort it.

I will do a short tourney report, but it will have to wait because I will be in the salt mines until late O'Clock.

Sent to Alex today