blonde poker forum

Evening Blonde,

I've been playing live around Luton for the past 2 years since moving to Bedford from Cornwall, mainly in the G but now more in Genting until I am allowed back into the G at managements' discretion.

In June of this year I self excluded myself from the G in a fit of tilt after dumping the money I got from winning their Saturday tourney on the cash tables. I thought I could self ban for a week or two to cool off and come back after my trip to Malia, but apparently it's a 6 month minimum. Currently awaiting contact from Grovesnor regarding my application to reinstate my membership for the new year.

Tilt isn't something I've really had problems with, but after being smacked about that night and dropping 100bb after 100bb to Luton's special brand of Saturday night cash game players I felt I had to sit out for a few weeks. Sadly that has turned out to be 6 months.

I'm currently working 4 nights a week from home taking chauffeur bookings over the phone for big pharma companies (GSK, AstraZeneca etc), and I'm lucky to have a job where I might do an hour of work in an 8 hour shift which opens up quite a big window to grind online at the same time. I have recently ended a staking deal to play MTTs online on good terms and I am going to be taking my roll to the live felt as I find live poker much more enjoyable, especially in Luton where I find it to be a good laugh and Raj (and George when he was there) and the guys at the G do a great job with their cardroom and putting up with my nonsense and awful jokes.

Another reason for making this thread is I don't have many friends in Poker, and I think there's a big Luton contingent here. I have the odd acquaintance but they seem to be perpetually bust and want to sell 90% of their action for a £50 comp and are never interested in actually discussing spots which is a shame.

I've probably played against most people here from Luton and I think I may not have the best reputation among them as I have a habit of drinking at the tables and being a bit boisterous due to anxiety. I typically have to have a pint or three to get me relaxed around other people and that is a massive life leak I have to fix. Maybe Valium or something.

Anyway...next stop - Genting Luton and their Superslow £5000 GTD on Saturday. Here's hoping to be on the good end of a 14 way chop.

The £5000 GTD at Genting Luton on Saturday seems like it's going to be a fun comp to play. £60 buy in with £10 juice.

Genting puts quite a high rake on because of their league, and it's quite frustrating having to pay the extra £5 or so for a league I don't play in. The fact the structure is 'Superslow' makes me want to play it more as I find that their tourney structures are way too fast. 22 minute clock with a bunch of level jumps early on (no 75/150, 250/500).

Genting seems to have a massive amount of regs, and I've been playing against them for the last 12 months so with the longer levels I feel it should be a good comp for me.

The G has the 25/25 this weekend and I'm gutted to be missing out due to my aforementioned self exclusion. Was really hoping I could just go back in and re-reg there but I have to go through the process of writing them a letter and awaiting their response with a yay or nay like it's the XFactor.

I've become quite a big fan of playing Dealer's Choice in the past few months. I've always done alright in the 8Game on Stars and I find the mix of games a lot more interesting and it can really help in breaking up the monotony of playing Holdem cash live.

I am a self confessed Superstud and Lowball degen and my favourite games online are Razz and Stud 8 or Better (I know right..) - but the DC game in Genting seems to be the same rotation of about 10 players and it feels quite alienating when they all to be good friends and I am very much the elephant in the room taking up a seat one of their pals could have so I don't play it as often as I like. Had a good few laughs at the table and we all had a 20 minute conversation about old WWE wrestling for some reason, but it's very much a 'new kid in school' feeling. I hope I haven't made anyone else feel the same when I was at the G playing holdem cash with 5 people I know and one that I don't, even if my jokes and half cut demeanor turn me into an unfunny Will Kassouf. 

Can't say I'm the biggest fan of 6 Card Omaha when stacks get as deep as they do at that DC game. It seems to be on the paddle for 5 out of 8 hands on the rotation, maybe hi lo or Corcheval with it but I'm not comfortable putting 300BB on the line in 6O on what I feel is a glorified flip.

I'm sat in that game far too often when I'm probably the fish at the table given the lack of holdem cash as Gentings most nights I can play. But then how good do you have to be to get it in with A23hhh in Superstud?

I'm really looking forward to getting back onto the grind in Luton at the G once I get reinstated. If you play there or have seen me chuffing on my massive e-cig and being so pissed I can't stack my own chips please say hello.

Welcome to blonde.

Good start to the diary.

Who are you?

Welcome to Blonde

I play at Luton 2-3 times a week, mostly G sometimes Genting, let me know who u are and I'll introduce myself if we cross paths. I mainly play 1/2 cash with the odd tournament thrown in.

Welcome to blonde, happy to here from another dc player looking forward for hand analysis and stories from dc games!! If u ever take the trip up north (nottingham) we do play couple of good dc games mid week it would be nice to meet in person!! :)

Welcome to Blonde sir.

"An unfunny Will Kassouf" = Will Kassouf obv.

Are you John Griffin?

Thanks for the welcome!

I'll use the template from the profile section to give more information about myself -

What is your BlondePoker username?
- Ransom  

Which area do you live in?
- Bedford, but originally from Redruth, Cornwall.

What is your marital status?
- Single, not for want of trying.

Do you have any children and/or pets?  
- A dog called Colin. Actual bellend of an animal.        

When did you start playing poker?
- I was 14/15 - poker became a bit of a fad in school after the Moneymaker win and we were all at it on this little play money site called TripleJack. I seem to be the only one who's stuck at it.

Where can you be found playing live?
- Luton G and Genting - sometimes Aspers Stratford.

What is your favourite online site?
- Pokerstars by far, though I am enjoying 888 right now for their very soft tourneys.

What is your handle there?
- WalderFrey - Big Game of Thrones fan, bad guys are way more fun. Plus CheckFoldLOL was taken which was my original screen name on PartyPoker from years ago.

What is the harshest beat you have inflicted on an opponent?
- I have been on the receiving end of many one outers at the Luton G, can't say I've inflicted any huge beats. My thing seems to be fading 16 out draws and massive wraps in PLO almost every time. I'm sure it'll all come crashing down soon.

Who are your poker heroes?
- Phil Galfond, Jason Somerville.

Who is your best friend in poker?
- My sister, I taught her to play about 2 years ago and we spend a lot of time discussing spots. She's going from strength to strength as a player and it's exciting to follow her progress.  

What are your greatest accomplishments in poker?
- Won pretty much every regular comp the Luton G offered as of 6 months ago, taking down Gus Hansen at $5/$10 2-7 on FullTilt (but who hasn't these days) when he sat my table for some reason.

What is your most embarrassing moment in poker?
--Having one too many drinks, getting AA pre on final table and just open shoving and insta-turning my hand face up before anyone else could act. Fold Fold Fold Fold Fold.  

Which Blondepoker thread did you enjoy the most?
- Prose From A Posh Boy - My inspiration for this thread.

The thing I love most about BlondePoker is?
- Yet to be determined but it looks like a friendly community.

My biggest pet hate in poker is?
- Limp limp limp limp - *RAISE* - call, call, call, call, call

What are your main interests outside poker?
- This question has really stumped me. I'm a big UFC fan, and I'm quite into gaming, though not as much as I used to be.

Tell us something about yourself none of us would know
- I was a professional Youtuber for about 2 years when I was 17-19, making a mug of myself on camera for Google Adsense money.

What is your favourite pie filling?
- Mince. Christmas Mince, not beef mince.

Who is your favourite singer?
- Dolly Parton and I'm not even sorry.

What is your favourite song?
- Right now, Uptown Funk by Bruno Mars. All time, no idea. My music taste is a bit eclectic, you'd be horrified at my Spotify and the things I listen to at the tables.  

Who is your ideal man or woman?
- Probably Taylor Swift or Alison Brie. Maybe a cyborg mash of the two.

What is your favourite holiday destination?
- Greece. I would up sticks and snap move there if the laws about poker income wasn't so strange.

If I could change one thing about myself I would?
- Have gone to Uni instead of sacking it off to play poker. Poker has been kind to me over the years but it could have waited 3 years.  

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For those that might have seen me around, my name is Harry. Usually bearded, black hair and I have a strange accent that puts me halfway between Eton schoolboy and one of the Wurzels.

Depending on my state of inebriation I can seem overly nervous and reserved, or overly chatty.  Manic checkraiser and chip shuffler, usually spaz my chips everywhere fiddling with them and I fold out of turn at least once an orbit. I chain smoke a big old e-cig and constantly have to endure dildo jokes because of it.

Might come across as a bit of an entitled online poker brat internet kid, however I really don't mean to.

No sir, but I believe we have crossed paths.

We chopped a round of each comp at Genting around 3 weeks ago?

Chompy chopped a comp?

Unlike him.

I could be mistaken, unless this is a joke I'm not privy to as of yet

Round of each? Not me sir. Can't play Omaha. Or Hold'em.

Well, he's a tall bald guy, terrible at poker, normally heard about 15 out asking for a saver, then from about 8 out asking for a chop. Sound familiar?

Verified....  ^^^

FYP

Don't do chops no more. Minus evey.

The new £50 at Genting on Saturday is a good comp ransom. Full of rofflers obv but a good comp.

Currently 2nd/8 in a rando PLO comp on 888. 137 runners.

Well I was until I lost AA74ss to Q9KT all in pre.

The princely sum of $131 up top which I'll use to buy in to Saturday at Genting should I be so fortunate. Nice to have a bit of a freeroll. Anything less then it'll at least pay for my taxi there.

If you see me on Saturday, come and say hello. I can be identified by my dwindling chip stack and disgusting tramps beard.

Good luck with the thread! Do you play on sky under the same name?

First out on 6 handed final table. Always a bit annoying.

Potted from the button to 35k with QJ89hh, ran into the nit the time he has AAxxhhss who jams on me for 40k more. Could moan about ICM considerations when someone has literally 3bb but sometimes you've just got to stick it in and not be a nit bitch as Jason Somerville says.

Don't mind getting it in at all, but I am 35.90% against his exact hand. Unfortunate.

Good to have a winning day and 3 final tables on 888, not so good to have to be on shift at midnight to take phone calls from disgruntled executives who think it's super easy to get a taxi on short notice in the Lebanon or something.

Brag - +$395 for the day.
Beat - I played a webcam poker comp on 888 and a guy got his knob out.
Variance - No milk for tea.

I haven't played on Sky since maybe 2009 they caught on to me abusing their free no deposit bonuses. I think I even signed up in my mums name once to get that free tenner and the £5 punt on Skybet. I guess that's my appearance fleecing a retired darts player on SkyPoker cash game out the window before it even began.

Plus I use a HUD and I know Sky don't allow it. Are they still web based or do they have an actual client now?

Another evening on the phones, shackled to my laptop via a cheap headset with Jeremy Kyle's dulcet tones to push me through until 8.

First call of the night, one minute into my shift -

Villain - "I ORDERED A TAXI FOR MIDNIGHT AND **YOUUUUU** SAID IT WOULD BE HERE!"
Hero - "...your car is on location, driver is in the hotel lobby waiting for you with a name board. Where abouts are you waiting?"
Villain - "I'M IN THE BALLROOM GETTING READY TO LEAVE!"
Hero - "......your driver can't go into the ballroom as it's a private function, he is in the lobby whenever you are ready to leave"
Villain - "..click."

I'm always surprised at how many of these corporate folks need their hands held through every situation. Christmas party season though, when drunk it seems that calling me to arrange a pick up is as difficult as string theory or listening to a story that starts with "..SO I HAVE ACES RIGHT.."

It's been fairly standard on the phone tonight. Change of airport, change to pricing, indecipherable emails from clients in Asia. Currently trying to plan a schedule of events outside the usual casino comps around Luton. APAT World Championships in March look super fun, though I will mainly be in for the mixed games and limit events as it's probably the only chance to play a limit structure all year in England. Plus bracelets! Not the ones we all really want but bracelets none the less.

Had to do a pick up for a certain football agent from a certain members only casino in London a few weeks ago. He phoned once an hour to delay his pick up, sounding more agitated each time. I guess both bollocks were done on a certain red, black and green wheel that night. I have a bit of an irrational hatred for roulette punters. I can't stand the game myself, I think I've had a couple of spins and hit my number on my birthday (18), never played again. There's nothing about it that excites me like poker does. I like gambling and as of right now gambling seems to like me, but whatever electrical brain impulse gets people mad for roulette doesn't fire for me. I guess I'm fortunate as I've seen many sad faces at the wheel and many people queuing for machines inside the bookies.

I have a lot of pet hates in poker, and I seem to experience most of them every time I play. A few listed below:

- The 1 and 9 seats. I can't see a bloody thing, so I need to squint to see the board from these seats and people think I'm doing some sort of shifty look trying to get reads off them and they think I'm a knob because of it.

- The announcement voice on the tourney clock when it's break time. I once played every comp at the G for 2 weeks and had dreams about this voice. "...POKER PLAYERS, YOU ARE NOW ON A SHORT BREAK. PLEASE LEAVE YOUR CHIPS AT THE TABLE AND VACATE THE CARDROOM".

- People who stack chips in little piles of 10. People who stack chips in one huge tower.

- Dealers who sweat the turn and river on an all in. I like my pain to be over quickly. I tilt my beans off if I'm all in pre with 55 vs AKd and the board is  Td 9d 9h and I'm waiting those long 5 seconds for both the turn and river.

Maybe I'm a miserable old sod, maybe I am the dark cloud hanging over the Luton G and when I get back in the mood will sour because Harry is here and he's going to moan into his £4.50 pint of Peroni.

Good luck all playing tonight, and if anyone can get video footage of John Hunt going on a mad one and moving all in blind UTG I will freeroll you into a event of your choice as long as it's under £50.

So it turns out that the Genting £5000 GTD isn't until next week. Makes sense when there's a 25/25 down the road at the G with £25k GTD, and I think it did about £40k in the end with £12k up top last time.

Tonight is a £50+7 with £3000 GTD. In two minds whether to play it or not, I'm much more keen on playing the DC comp on Sunday instead. Half the buyin of the £3000 and probably 5x more fun. Plus an opportunity to play some 6 Card Omaha without having to put a ton of money on the line. My omaha run good is due to come crashing down in flames and I don't really want to tempt fate in DC cash until my rolls on Stars and 888 are safely in my bank account so I can endure the swings. 888 are being crafty and taking their time with my withdrawal all whilst sending me casino offers via email in the hopes I do a reversal and degen it off in their live casino. Always find it interesting when they send me 1 poker related email for every 10 casino offers.

I assume it will break guarantee at Genting tonight. 60 runners isn't that much to ask for, and there will be extra traffic from those not playing the 25/25.

Anyone playing the 25/25? Think it'll be a bit softer because of EPT and Eureka in Prague this week?

Good read mate. I play DC regularly in Blackpool. Love the gamble, hate the swings!

Thanks mate, much appriciated!

Does your DC game have things like Badugi or 2-7 Triple Draw on the paddle? I've yet to find one that does. Queried it with a couple of cardroom managers because it's always been in the back of my mind and they've said there is no real reason for not allowing them, they've just chosen to leave them off the rotation.

So I didn't play the £3000GTD in Genting last night. I came off nightshift with the ambition of going to bed pretty much straight away to be up for 5pm so I can head from Bedford to Luton for about 6:30, but I got caught up watching the EPT stream until about 2pm. Set an alarm for 5 to see how I felt, but I woke up at midnight somehow with the alarm switched off. I guess my subconscious thought it more prudent to give this one a miss rather than try to play on 3 hours sleep.

Still today is the DC comp and I am heading down for that 100%. Big fan of this. £500 GTD but it almost always gets about 35 runners with about 20+ rebuys for a £1200 prizepool on average. Not so bad for a £25 buy in. Probably up the gamble on my first bullet seeing as I saved £60 from not playing last night. This comp always reminds me of this sketch from the League of Gentlemen.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WtSvaSZ-xLU

They have a Holdem comp at 8pm also as a backup if things go a bit tits up at DC. Think there's an addon involved but truth be told I've never made it past first break the 2 times I've played it. I am prone to being a bit of a shovebot in the final 5 minutes before first break given the folks with less around starting stack are more apt to go for a spin up with  6h 7h or something and rebuy rather than try and get it in with a more premium holding. It's never worked out for me on a Sunday though. Every time I've mentioned 'Last hand before re-entry!" it's turned into some 4 way all in.

Just got time to kill before I leave for Genting at about 2pm. I always get very restless trying to kill time before a comp, no matter the buy in. I'm always excited to play live, while the magic of Christmas has long since left me, the magic of poker is still very much alive in this one. Let's see if it lasts until midnight.

Sort of off topic - for the fans of surreal comedy like The League of Gentlemen or Psychoville, I really recommend Toast Of London. Just finished it's second series on Channel 4, but available on 4oD. There's an episode that revolves around a poker game with Andrew Lloyd Webber and it actually has a realistic hand unlike the vast majority of poker in media and that ridiculous hand from Casino Royale that was on the other night.

I plan on posting some DC hands on here later this evening, probably all tourney hands as I think DC cash will be £2/£2 tonight which is outside my roll for pot limit games for the time being.

GL all on the Sunday grind. Looking forward to top set with redraws and lovely big wireups. Maybe a Go Johnny Go Go Go Go if I'm lucky.

We play triple draw occassionally. Padooki is a popular game down here ( like badugi, but worst 4 card flush wins in lieu of any padooki).

Ha, this is funny because I was playing a private game a few months ago and Padooki was on the paddle. I thought I was being grafted by a bunch of Italians because they said the 4 card flush beat my A24 3 card lo. I just assumed Padooki was a regional name for Badugi.

The more you know! Maybe if more cardrooms here spread draw games I wouldn't be such a fish.

DC hand - Superstud.

Blinds 100-200.

I get 10d 7d 3d Jc 9h

Discard Jc 9h and show the 3d.

Everyone else is showing spades or clubs. A peel here with live diamond is fine if not a little spewy with no lo

Pull 5d on 4th street opening a backdoor lo with my 4flush.

5th street is an offsuit brick. Get potted and one caller. Caller is showing potential 8 lo and other guy is high only.

6th is 2d and I lead for pot. Get repotted and called with the high only player showing AJKT.

Brick 7th so no scoop and it checks to me from the Ahigh.

Bet for 12k and 2 folds.

I'm looking for some clarification on something that happened at Genting last night.

It's a £1-£1 cash game, button choice of Hold'em or 4 Card Omaha. Only 4 handed.

Omaha hand gets to showdown and both me and villain (Guy I've played with a bunch of times, fairly standard reserved live player, nice enough guy from my interactions with him) have the wheel. The £70 pot is raked and chopped and we move on.

In the next hand one of the other players says "He had 46 for the nut straight!" and then Villain seems to remember this also. I assumed we were going to move on and just laugh it off seeing as the pot was chopped, nobody lost and we had another hand in progress, but the dealer calls floor who comes over and says the following to me -

"Did you see his hand with 46?" - Truthfully I didn't. When I called the river and say "Wheel", he does too and the dealer pushes the board up.
"Did anyone else see it" - Now 3 players say they did (not sure if the other guy was even paying attention to the hand, he seemed to just be agreeing with his mate).

Floor decision - I had to decide if I was going to pay out to the player who apparently had the nut straight. And I had to decide at that moment, 2 hands after the incident took place.

Pretty uncomfortable position to be put in and I am pretty sure that this isn't the right thing to do - could any dealers or ex-dealers let me know.

Spoiler - Me and the other guy agreed that I would give him £10 and we could move on. Flopped a set and doubled through a big stack next hand anyway so all's well that ends well.

NO! NO! NO!

I mean, this is ridiculous. People speaking up after the next hand is dealt? People ganging up and agreeing? The person accepting a tenner as compensation? Glad I don't play in Luton anymore. Seems a really dickish thing that they all done.

Are you sure the pot was raked? Gentings don't rake split pots from the point the hand goes heads up.

Once the dealer has started to wash the deck their is no come back to a previous hand. If a mistake has been pointed out the floor can suggest a way to resolve the situation but it is totally your decision. You shouldn't be pressured in any way to hand money over to someone that you don't know for sure has beaten you in a pot. If you didn't see it you don't have to pay it.

It may not have been, I got one of the 50p chips in the split so I assumed it was raked when now I think about it it's more likely it was just change made out of a £1 chip.

This is what I thought, but this guy is a regular in Luton cash games and I don't need any potential aggro or some reputation as an angleshooter as it's easy for those stories to spread in a smallish town, plus the money is on the table and not in his pocket so there was a chance I would just grab it back eventually.

Understand why you gave him the £10 in that situation.

Name and shame the floor. That's an absolutely unbelievable ruling which should be brought to his manager's attention. Completely against the rules of poker.

Debating heading down to Genting tonight. £30+6 with £2000 GTD and 3 seats to their £165 'Poker Link' comp around New Years.

The Poker Link is an interesting concept. It's sort of like those big bingo games where a few clubs are linked together over a screen and they all pool the money into one big prizepool. Three day 1s spread over Luton, Reading and Southend. Then everyone meets in the middle at Luton for day 2 and 3. £29,660 GTD or some figure like that. It's not a full £30k though which is odd, think there must be some GPS seats in there for the prize pool to be that amount.

Might play some holdem cash if for some miracle it is running, though after the abysmal ruling given against me on Sunday in a cash game I should probably boycott them as a form of protest, though I'll doubt they'll notice and/or care.

----

Drinking and driving action

As I mentioned previously in this thread, I suffer from quite a bit of anxiety. I find myself nervous around large groups unless I am a couple of drinks deep. So the first thing I do in a cardroom is sit in the corner and inhale a pint whilst pretending to use my phone in the hopes people leave me alone until my dutch courage has kicked in. Smoking area is off limits because someone will want to strike up a conversation about roulette or ask me if I'm winning, and being in a confined space with someone I don't know gives me sweaty palms. Unless I'm steaming and then I will talk for hours and join in with the nonsense gamblers spew.

This doesn't stem from any incident, I was never jumped by a gang of lads and it's made me scared to be alone in public or anything. I don't know what treatment there is for this, and I think I might get looked at like a loony if I went to a doctor and said "Listen mate, I'm generally scared to be out in public, I take taxis everywhere because of it and I won't talk to anyone unless I'm six sheets to the wind. Got any pills for that?". There's a lot of stigma around mental issues like this, and I don't want to get branded with the 'MAD' iron on my forehead.

The problem with this is I have to keep up a degree of inebriation throughout the night, and it's very easy to cross the line from 'talkative' to 'slurring pisshead'. The problem with slurring pisshead is that sometimes you think you can 5bet shove  6s 8s and it'll work to the old mans 4bet that's 4 times the 3bet amount. The other problem is I find myself getting in weird ego wars with other young players. It's completely dumb, it costs me tournaments and sometimes I'm left wondering if any banter exchanged has left someone with a poor opinion of me.

The Pain Train

Got a feeling I'll be on the 1am train from Luton to Bedford after this comp (if I go). I've coined this The Pain Train, as it's the train I catch when I near bubble a comp and there's no cash games running, so I'm booking a loss and I have to evade the train station staff so I'm not out another £8 for the train back. I don't drive due to being in quite a serious car crash when I was 17 and narrowly avoiding decapitation by about 2 inches, which doesn't really help my generally skittish nature. Whenever I am waiting for the pain train, someone is always quick to hit me up for some money at the station. Always a sob story, always me alone on the platform with someone asking for a fiver. It's never a quid anymore, it's always a fiver. Even in Luton town, the local degens outside Wetherspoons want a fiver. It's hard to say "I've only got a pound mate" while trying to keep a tight hand on the wrap of £50s in your wallet when you know he doesn't believe you.

Anyway here's to the comp tonight - here's to the hangover in the morning and here's hoping some relatives come through with a few quid in a Christmas card because I'm probably going to need a rebuy tonight.

Hi Ransom
I will be investigating the situation you have brought to my attention as I'm
Not to happy with this myself
And find out why this decision was made,
I will return your £10 and also offer you free entry into tonight's competition while i find out the full details of what has happened
And ensure the supervisor in questions is fully aware of how to learn from this experience

Speak soon James Cardroom Manager Luton

Hats off James, well done

Hi James,

This is very much appreciated. While I would have been happy just knowing that it was an incorrect ruling, you're really going above and beyond and it reaffirms my view that Genting Luton is a great room to play poker in.

I'll be in around 7-7:30. Straggly beard and black jumper just incase someone tries to nick my freeroll!

Nice gesture, well played.

I am not in club tonight but the supervisor will be aware of the situation
Just tell him your name "ransom" and it will sorted

James

When we meet I will have a chat about what things u think we can do to improve your experience in club,

Free entry received with thanks.

Talked over the situation with the chap who made the ruling and all is well. I would mention he said I was under no obligation to hand any money over but it was up to me to decide.

Not my intention to get him into any trouble, I just wanted to query the decision.

Also does he know he has a twin who works at the G, or is he moonlighting down there also?

The players should know better though. Which was my main problem.

A little trip report for you.

Played the comp on a freeroll thanks to the great customer service at Genting.

Made two hero calls and was right. The first was me with Qhigh on AKKA3. The second seemed to really irk someone.

Raised pre to 2k at 300/600. I call in MP with 33 - obvious set mining seeing as I'm freerolling. Flop 9d 4d 2h. Preflop raiser cbets 3k. I raise to 6.7k. I don't think that flop had hit him and almost every turn sucks for me so I'm trying to take it down now.

C-better shoves for 15k. I don't think I can really fold here. I go deep into the tank and find the call.

He has Qc Ks for a bit of a blow up and I hold. He then had a bit of a pop despite the other players agreeing it was a sick call.

My only reason for calling is that I've seen him lose his head before in these spots. Read was right on this occasion.

-----

In lighter news I left Genting about £1350 lighter. DC got the better of me and I bricked every single street as a favourite. But sometimes you lose. Sometimes you go down to play a comp you've been graciously allowed to play for free and you do your bollocks. Not nice to lose about 10% of the bankroll in one night. Not my worst loss though, pales in comparison to my £5/10 shot where I dusted off £3.5k in one sitting.

I'm surprisingly calm about it. It's just points on the board and we lost a few.

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For any Genting staff snooping - give Paige a raise. She's too lovely to be involved with a bunch of degens such as us. She deserves more compensation than the 50p chips I keep flicking her.
------

Now I have to get on the grind and spin up £1000. Big heads up hyper turbo one time?

Only difference Id have on this is I think I try and get all my chips in on 6th as you have the likely best high and a good low draw and could get peoples stacks in drawing for one half of the pot? The way it played out they had opportunity to fold when missing on 7th street?

So I have to work tonight, on what we consider the worst night shift of the year. Two large Christmas parties, one booking for a large retail chain has 98 (with more bookings incoming every 15 minutes) taxis all to arrive at exactly midnight. Another has 14 taxis for 1am, and are notorious for panicking if they don't have a chauffeur in their face bang on the time they booked it for. Going to be a very stressful 2-3 hours seeing as I'm co-coordinating this alone, but after this one is done all of our big UK based clients are basically off until New Years so it's plain sailing all the way through until 2015.

Speaking of 2015, I've been mulling over my poker related goals for the year ahead and I really can't think of any. I don't expect to bink any WSOP bracelets, I don't expect any deep EPT runs and I don't expect to get any magazine articles. I'm fairly happy about just taking it easy in 2015, and just focusing on making correct decisions and enjoying the good things that come with it. I guess if I don't go overboard with any expectations, then I can't be disappointed if 2015 is a crushingly bad year.

I plan on playing a lot of 8 Game on Stars and attempting a Supernova run there, but it's something that will probably take a long time to get to and there's not much chance of making Supernova more than once at that game given the lack of action above $4/$8 limit. I reckon I will hit it hard starting January the 1st and then slowly drop sessions until I get frustrated or bored.

--

I plan on cutting back on the live comps in Luton. Not really enjoying them as much as I used to, not a knock on the casino at all, I just the find the play to be really repetitive each time, and I'm losing interest in going an hour out of my way to go through the motions like it's Groundhog Day. Live Hold'em cash I could play until my eyes bled, but low buyin Hold'em comps with 4 spots from 50 runners paying are starting to lose my interest.

I find casinos are offering bigger and bigger starting stacks, but dropping most of the levels before second break so you effectively play the same structure as you would if you played with 15K starting stacks and you kept the 75/150, 150/300/25 and 250/500/50 levels. I wonder if there was research done there and they've figured out offering bigger starting stacks with level jumps gets more punters in the door.

--

Probably won't be playing much until the New Year so I can start fresh. I don't want to be spewing chips across the table on the final run up to Christmas. I find the idea of that a bit depressing.

Have a good Christmas all, and if I've clowned money off to you in the past 2 weeks I hope you spend it on something nice for yourself or your family. If you do decide to punt it in the pit, I hope you spin it up. And then you can punt it all back to me in 2015. ;)

I dont play the normal Luton comps anymore as the prepensity to give huge starting stacks has effectively ruined the game... we have now produced a player type that will not fold pre flop to pretty much any bet with any two cards because of the huge amount of chips at their disposal...

Its almost impossible to put someone on a hand early doors.. the usual scenario is 50-100...limp..limp...limp..limp.limp...2000..call.call..call.call..call hundred bb pot pre flop with hand ranges around K 4 Q2 82 and everything in between..

7.5K with the levels would play so much better unfortunatly give the latest influx of players 7.5K to play with they would have a fit... try to explain the structure and play would be better is like explaining physics to a child in urdu...

The Friday £5k at the G was brilliant when it used the GUKPT structure for a bit. 10K start with 8K addon at first break. Shifted people off limp/calling in the first few levels, and the variation in stack sizes in bbs come final table was good enough to stop the standard 7 way chop.

I'm very much anti-deal at final tables, unless it's literally 6bb each which can be the case after a long bubble. I can never understand people who come to play a comp, and would rather take 3rd place money than play it out for 1st. They take massive flips for their tourney life at 500/1000/100, but won't take it on a final table because the difference between 4th and 3rd is £120.

I would suggest some sort of prize or token for those who win a comp outright with no deal. The G had a promotion where if you won the comp you'd get a coloured card protector, and the more you had, the better the reward you got. Collect all 7 and you freeroll the £1k GUKPT. Sadly they stopped this when I was on 4, so I got a free entry into the monthly £100. Stick a seat into a monthly into the mix and I think you'd see a lot more people playing it out.

Excellent posts Random and Sicilidonk. I completely agree with both of you but apparently we're in the minority.

Luton tournament poker is so disappointing these days.

I agree too, although I've never been to Luton.

Wait a second, that wasn't you at the G for GUKPT week?

Personally I think luton comps are great fun ,they've all started wearing headphones now and studying I pads
HELLO it's a £30 midweek donkament some are tanking like it's an ept most of em think it is an ept it's hilarious
The dc cash is the same now it's populated with g regs they put their chips in get called and say ' I knew you had that !'
How can a donk like me play against people who know what you've got ??
It's well worth a visit

Nope, probably my older brother Celtic

Well done James, exactly the response I would expect from you.

Hope you are well.

Yeah did you see that guy put close to £300 in the middle with the 8 lo draw in SuperLowball because he was so sure the other guy double paired and was trying to pot him off it.

Wow I would sure hate to be that guy.......

--

I find there's a clear divide in Luton with the old regs who have been playing the schedules for years, and the younger guys and girls who've come from online and have a go in a live comp once every few weeks. Don't really see the two groups mix apart from in the smoking pit on break where you have to make idle chit chat.


The younger guys are more into their poker media I think, and will emulate people they see on TV. I don't think it's much different from the kids playing Sunday football who wear the fancy boots and want to do a bunch of stepovers like Ronaldo. If they're going to try fancy plays and tank check raise one of the older regs, it won't work and they'll come unstuck at some point.
 
Some may find it cringey and a bit silly but if they can only afford to play a couple of £25 comps a month between Uni and work then more power to them if they want to go on a triple barrel rampage during the first blind level and pretend to be a sicko German in a Super High Roller.

I'm still booting my dogs tennis ball around the kitchen and pretending my doorway is an empty net and it's 90+3 in the World Cup final. Now that's sad.

I'm having a shepherds pie before a nanna nap on the sofa and charging my I pad so I can make it a late night at the luton ept tonight

Hi James,

This is very much appreciated. While I would have been happy just knowing that it was an incorrect ruling, you're really going above and beyond and it reaffirms my view that Genting Luton is a great room to play poker in.

I'll be in around 7-7:30. Straggly beard and black jumper just incase someone tries to nick my freeroll!
[/quote]
99% sure I was sat on your right for most of this tournament boss. I'm never fucking playing mid week comps again

Such loosers, got too adjust too the regime man. Y'all think everyone is Koi tastic then time to get the increased win rate rod out imo. Focussing more on the game than the affectations might be start for you and Sir Donks, merry Xmas xx

Nirvana's posting has come on leaps and bounds.

Haha, so historic

Im aiming to be the new Dick Lynch..by the way does he still play.. on my rare forays to ye old Luton havent seen him...kinda like the old curmudgeon

Was ill for a while in the spring, think/hope he's better now.

ah..bugger..fingers crossed for hem...

So it's absolute scenes right now in the car park of this event that has 107 taxis booked for midnight. Common sense would dictate you might go outside and have a look in the car park for your car, but apparently calling me from the dancefloor to complain that your driver isn't there while chucking a drink down your neck is a more viable option.

We've pulled cars from as far down as Kent for this, and half of the people going back there haven't even turned up for the booking. We've got senior clients trying to grim people of their taxis, people going walkabout, people who've pulled who want to change the destinations to a hotel and people who are too drunk and are being refused safe passage to their paracetamol and beds. Should all be over in an hour or so, barring the odd person who's going to wake up in the hotel toilet and need a lift home, which I won't be able to do so it's a long walk back to Essex or a few hours kip on the station platform. You'd think these people have never been pissed in the middle of nowhere before. I assumed it was a right of passage to go out, get hammered, somehow find your way home and wake up with a dry mouth, sore head and bits of chilli sauce down your shirt.

--

When I was younger and doing my A levels in Media and Film I had this idea for a TV channel that would actually show decent programmes but only operate at night. While Netflix and On Demand TV killed that idea, it seems like it would be very welcome now. My options for late night viewing are basically the BBC Business news live from Singapore or teleshopping. There's only so many times you can watch the same infomercial for ceramic frying pans and the hosts acting like they've found a cure for AIDS while showing how you can wipe this pan clean with no effort. If there is a hell, I think the only thing to watch there will be adverts for pressure washers and fitness DVDs.

--

I look forward to seeing what poker related gifts I get for Christmas. There's only so much decent poker related merchandise, and the rest is just overstock from the poker boom 10 years ago. I received 'John Thomson's Red Hot Poker" last year. An instructional DVD by that guy from Cold Feet and The Fast Show. I'm not sure if it was a rubdown that it's taken me 12 months to get or a general attempt to get me something related to my only interest. I mean I had been playing for 10 years when I received it but it was appreciated none the less, and I will watch it at some point for a laugh. Maybe John Thompson is a sicko and can teach me how to be better at PLO. More likely he just needed the money a decade ago and got roped into it because he was on Celebrity Poker Challenge once.

Some might say the sooner I watch that DVD the better, maybe he will show me how to limp/call like a pro.

99% sure I was sat on your right for most of this tournament boss. I'm never fucking playing mid week comps again
[/quote]

Are you the young chap who saw me go running nut flush on that woman who then called me a fish, or the guy who had a go at me for hero calling his 3bet shove on the flop with 33 who then called me a donkey?

Are you the young chap who saw me go running nut flush on that woman who tilt left the table and she called me a fish, or the guy who had a go at me for hero calling his 3bet shove on the flop with 33 who then called me a donkey?
[/quote]

Witty, entertaining, Well observed in well written...

Excellent post. More like this please.

Much appreciated, thank you!

Classic luton last night
At. 25/50 it goes raise to 200 call call
Me  2d  3d calls too
Aces also calls
Next to act 2025
Call call call
So I call
Aces makes it 8025
It goes fold fold fold
Some clown with  2d.  3d. -me calls
Flop  Ac  Tc  4s
Moi all in
Aces obv calls
Turn  5h
Wee
River  Jh

Good start  ;D ;D ;D ;D

Very happy to see tomorrow's bookings for work drop from 1000+ to 224, almost all of which taking place after I finish at 8am. I think I only have about 12 bookings to look after all night, so nothing could possibly go wrong with that. The last Friday before Christmas - which is traditionally used for getting bladdered and kicking the shit out of each other in the streets, will be spent by me tethered to my laptop via headset and hopefully doing bugger all. I wonder who's going to ring me up and spoil it.

--

I'm very bad at sticking to New Year's Resolutions. I don't really bother making them as they'll usually last a week before I give up. I did manage to pretty much stop smoking all together after getting an e-cig on a whim, though I can be found having the odd one in a casino smoking area. Partly as an excuse to get away from the tables for a few minutes, partly to give me something to do on tourney break so I don't end up messing about on blackjack. I do need to give up on the takeaways though. I'm fortunate that it's still hard for me to lump on weight at 24 years of age, but it won't be long until one pizza will pile a stone onto my boyish, slender frame.

I was spending about £100 a week on takeaways earlier in the year. Mostly out of laziness, but I've managed to knock that down to about £50 a month now. I pride myself on possibly being the one who killed the Domino's Winter deal last year by gaming the system and being able to add double dough balls and stuffed crusts for no extra money. I read about those guys to figured out a flaw in video poker machines in Vegas and took them for $750,000 - I felt as happy as they must have, even if I only got away with extra pepperoni and tomato cheesey grease bread. When you work nights though your options are to stick a frying pan on and wake the whole house up, or get a styrofoam box of salmonella and garlic sauce from Andreas...basically zero options.

--

EPT Malta looks like it has a lot of potential for a visit thanks to being in close proximity to Luton airport and their "you get what you pay for" flights. There's a lot of low buy in events, a couple of limit championship events and some good value super sats to the EPT Main Event. Probably be in for 100% of myself seeing as that for every live event/casino comp I've won/cashed the results haven't been put on Hendon Mob, or I've managed to bubble the ones that do in hilarious fashion thus depriving myself of a much needed flag.

I don't mind though, I love a sweat. This trip would depend on a solid couple of months playing cash, which right now doesn't seem too far fetched. I constantly surprise myself though, and a good run there would set me up for WSOP, where my dreams will lie shattered amongst the Nevada desert with the rest of those seeking bracelet glory.

New Years Resolution - be more optimistic.

Hahahaha, was this the G or Genting?

Genting mate I don't go to the g

If there's a better argument for card rooms to look at starting stacks, then I doubt you'll find a better one than this.

What do you wanna do ? Sit n wait for aces that never arrive ??
Seen you jam it in with 4-7 sooted v qq n won
Week before I went out Kk v jj in a 4 bet 982 flop pot j on river
We play our cards there at genting with good valet service , impartial dealers , good floor miles better than the g imo

Actually, I looked at one and got it in 😀

Oh and had 5 bigs in the BB at the time. And that was against Brian Stein, he opened early, so should never have a 4 in his hand, so figured I was live.

The hand you mention above never happens if we have decent starting stacks. If it does, then it won't be long before it stops.

Just pulled off a 12 hour shift where the phone rang exactly once. Midnight to midday, and about 30 seconds of work done. Nice when it happens, and I consider this karma for the shambles that was Thursday night in St Albans where clients fell asleep in a hotel car park because they were too drunk to figure out whos taxi was whos. No more until Boxing day. Shame really, it's double time for Christmas day and there hasn't been a call on Christmas Day in 3 years.

--

Not heading down to Genting for the DC comp this afternoon. It's been a staple of my weekend for a while, but I'm just not feeling it today. Taxi to Bedford train station, train to Luton, taxi from Luton station to Genting - That's about £25-£30 before I even get in the door. Then depending on how late I'm there it's another £20 to get home. Seems a bit pointless to enter a comp that costs less than the amount it will cost to get to the casino. Need to get like 5th to break even on the day. Expenses to play in the G were about a £10-£15 a trip, little easier to make that back on cash with a couple of small pots rather than having to double through a shorter stack to pay off my transportation costs for Gentings. When I can get on more of a full time grind it will be exclusively in the G because of the costs involved with getting to Genting. Not to good to have to write off 40bb at £1/£1 before you even start.

I usually couple it with the Sunday night holdem comp they have down there, but considering the hefty losses for this week it seems more worthwhile to have a bash online today and at least try and satellite into some of their bigger comps.

--

I need to work on knowing when to leave the table in cash games when I am winning. I will stay until the last person leaves or the staff have had enough and want to go home. I used to think it was some awesome degen badge of honor to be on a 20 hour live grind and being the first one in and the last one out, but my mental state will suffer for days afterwards. I won't be able to think of anything else but poker, I won't be able to sleep because I will constantly see hands and flops in my mind.

It's apparently pretty normal after a lot of repetitive actions, called the Tetris Effect, but all too frequently I will be booking a winner and my stack will slowly dwindle because I've stayed too long. I've started cash at 1pm, played a comp from 4pm-2am, and then back on cash until 9am. I've been up 4 or 5 buyins and left 7 hours later +£20, and stayed well past the point I should have and ended up in a reg fest long after the last fun player has gone home.

That's going to be my biggest leak when I transition to full time live cash. I in no way intend to just lock it up after a couple of good pots and jump on the next train home, but I want to know when to recognise that tipping point and be able to leave as soon as it starts to slide. I'd much rather be able to just sit down in the main bar and wait half an hour before leaving to cool down rather than just playing "one more orbit" to pass the time. Because that one orbit turns into two, and then it's 6am and I've ran it down to a breakeven session rather than a winner. I've probably lost the most money just outstaying my welcome rather than spewing.

I'd want to get on the £1/£2 as soon as possible down the G. I'll probably give it a couple of weeks of .50/£1 just to try and run up a little bit of shot taking money and have a bit of a scout of any £1/£2 regs seeing as £1/£2 NLH was rare when I was playing before my self exclusion. No idea if it's a straight 100-200bb buy in or one of those £1/£2 games with double straddles galore and about £6000 on the table.

As long as Anik is still open raising to £70 at .50/£1, it should be a fun venture. Shame every time I've been in a pot with him he's always got there. Beat me with K4 once vs AA for a chunky pot. They call it the Luton Nuts for a reason.

Evening Blonde!

I hope you've all had a lovely Christmas, and that your brandy induced headache tomorrow morning subsides quickly so you can get stuck in to the Boxing Day tradition of turkey sandwiches, turkey soup, turkey curry, turkey on toast and Kentucky Fried Turkey.

I've always been a bit of a curmudgeon on Christmas Day. I enjoy the build up to Christmas, but the actual event puts me in a bit of a mood. All the pressure comes to a head and I find I can't enjoy it because I'm too aware of the constant facade of smiles and the feigned surprise when you open your 3rd Lynx Africa boxset. But this year I've had a nice time. It's felt a lot like Christmases from my childhood. I can't really explain why, so I'll just put it down to some magic Santa sprinkled on me while I was sleeping.

Best gift award goes to my sister - Moorman's Book of Poker, and a Christmas card that says "Happy Christmas you fun player". Me and my sister have a tradition of writing jokey poker related messages in our Christmas cards, and it will come to a head where one of us crosses the line and upsets the other at some point. Maybe I will get one in 2018 that will say "Merry Christmas, remember when you sat £5/£10 live with your whole £3k tourney bink which was 80% of your whole bankroll and 5 bet shoved QQ into AA and lost it all". Still a bit salty about that, and she knows it. Mine was a slightly less interesting  - "Merry Christmas, 3 to 5bet more".

I've spent most of the day helping my sister with her 8 game grind on Stars. She's only playing 0.40/0.80 limit to get a feel for the mechanics of the game and the betting structure but she's quick to figure it out and is on 4 winning days out of 5 and is up something like 80 big bets overall which is good. She's playing because she actually enjoys the games and isn't fazed by the small stakes right now. I want to have her on the $1/$2 limit soon as there is a lot of easy money there. She's getting a bit fed up of constantly chopping pots in Stud/8 though. Limit holdem is the game she's struggling with right now, and truth is it's probably my worst game so I need some work on that before I can help her more there.

APAT WCOAP schedule came out today and I'm quite excited by it. I'm penciling myself in for the Stud, Razz, HORSE, Holdem Main Event, Heads Up and the High Roller but I'll need to see how many of those conflict because I plan on winning a bracelet there.

---

In slightly less fun news - My best friend got called into the hospital on the 22nd for an emergency endoscopy. They found what he described as a "fuck off tumor" in his duodenum which is somewhere in the small intestine. It's rare for it to be cancerous apparently which is a good sign I guess, but if it is then it's a pretty grim outlook. 1 year survival rate is about 45% which drops significantly afterwards.

It's a flip. Hopefully he takes after me and flops metaphorical quads and has it drawing dead. GL GL mate.

---

Until next time Blonde, have a good one and make some cake at the tables.

Really enjoying this Diary, nice balance between poker & real-life Ransom, demands to be read.

Tough break for your friend, fingers crossed he wins the flip.

Truth it, "it is what it is".

I got in terrible trouble for saying "it is what it is" yesterday, after a dreadful & outrageous tragedy a few days ago (Sky Poker "crashed" for an hour), but, well that's pretty much the position.


Keep it coming.  

Thanks Tikay, much appreciated!

Been around Luton much? Surprised I've never seen you there given the amount of time I've spent in the G these past two years.

Currently in the middle of a 12 hour shift. 8pm-8am, being paid double time and exactly 30 bookings on from now until New Years Day. A rare real life freeroll, and I am taking advantage of it massively by sampling all of the unopened Christmas chocolate and a sip from the various beverages Mum received for Christmas whilst she's asleep. She said I could help myself yesterday, I assume it carries over to the 27th as well. She didn't specify any terms and conditions, so more fool her.

There's a chap who runs incredibly bad lifetime with taxi bookings with one on tonight at 04:45. They either never turn up, or they take him to the wrong place. I am eagerly awaiting his wrath at 5am. If dealing with an angry corporate type is one thing, dealing with them at 5am when they have a flight to catch at 7am is another. He is prone to hanging up in anger and then not calling back which I suppose is a plus. I do just want to tell him to book it with someone else, we have about 20 different providers on his account for him to use but he insists on taking the same company who give him issues each time.

---

Livestreams of poker on Twitch.tv are becoming increasingly popular. Fronted by the ever entertaining WSOP bracelet winner and host of 'RunItUp!' Jason "JCarver" Somerville, people from all over the world are now putting their sessions online in real time for our viewing pleasure.

At the time of writing this there is

-An American chap livestreaming PLO cash games
-A group of French lads playing an actual holdem home cash game complete with beer, cigarettes and comedy slowrolls.
-Someone on a manic 16 table grind to reach Supernova before the year is out.
-Various tourney grinds, with streamers talking through their processes in their native languages.

This is a great thing for poker in more than one way. The first would be the new wave of poker personalities emerging. It seemed like until recently if you wanted to become a well known poker player you'd have to have an almighty heater on the tourney scene, or go on an Isildur like run at the cash tables taking down all in your way until you reigned supreme. Now as long as you have a webcam and software to broadcast your computer screen, you can start showing your face to the world whilst on your grind. And as long as you have an engaging personality, you can pick up the viewers piece by piece until people recognise you by your screen name.

And you don't even need to be good at poker! Some of you might be familiar with the name StickyRice1. StickyRice1 (real name unknown) is apparently a professional CounterStrike player - a competitive Army vs Terrorists team based shooter game for those who aren't familiar. About 2 weeks ago he decided to have a punt on Bovada, and deposited $2000. Ignoring conventional bankroll management, he jumped right into $10/$20 no limit holdem.

What happened will probably go down in history until the next time someone does it. He managed an against all odds run, winning every 80/20, every 60/40 and every flip to take his initial deposit of $2000 to $38,000 in around 36 hours - all whilst knowing bugger all about poker except that two pairs is better than one pair. He live streamed every minute of his sessions, and the internet was abuzz with the name StickyRice1 and stories of his antics. Who is the man behind the name? Just some obnoxious lad in his early 20s in his bedroom who's probably never held poker chips before and probably thinks VPIP and PFR are a European dance music duo.

Sadly yesterday he punted his the last $1200 in his account live on Twitch.tv, put his head to his desk for a few seconds and ended the stream. We've all had feelings like that before, but I could tell this was the first time poker had really kicked him in the gut and that this clueless-ness wasn't an act for the camera. You never forget the first time you go busto. Unfortunately I feel that winning $38,000 in just over a day will be the worst thing that ever happened to him. The pain of the monetary loss will subside at some point, but the feeling of turning low 4 figures into a decent 5 figure score in a day with just blind luck will never leave him. If I could I would tell him to never play again, because he will forever be chasing that high, and grinding .25/.50 will never satisfy him.

For a week he was the most talked about poker player in the world. He has a thread on 2+2 which is into the hundreds of pages, and he doesn't even know it exists. He didn't beat Phil Ivey for seven figures, he didn't win a bracelet or an EPT. He just had a webcam and was in the right place in the right time.

Right place at the right time. I find that strangely apt for a poker player.



 

Happy New Year Blonde!

A funny thing happened when I woke up. I had zero desire to play poker at all. Not live or online, not even heads up dealers choice on the living room floor with my sister. I thought I may have had an aneurysm or something during the night that rewired my brain, but after several cheap Londis energy drinks I am wired and ready to get back on the horse for a profitable 2015.

I didn't go out for New Years. I never have actually. I refuse to pay a tenner to get into a pub that's free for the other 364 days of the year, so I stayed in and decided to bet my sister I could win a $1.10 5 Card Draw tourney on Pokerstars. Got 6th out of 110 in the end, but a final table is a final table and that $8.50 win should hopefully kickstart the year off right. 5 Card Draw is a boring format in my opinion, it seems that you just need to be on the right side of coolers and just get dealt full houses at the right time. You can also just bluff your nuts off as well.

Me and my sister have been playing a game we learned called 'Sviten Special'. Originating in the Sviten Club in Sweden, it's a cross between 5 card draw and 5 card Omaha. Split pot between the best 5 card draw hand and the best Omaha hand. Rules can be found here - http://www.pagat.com/poker/variants/sviten.html - mental action game, get this on the DC paddle so we can all go broke.

---

I feel like starting a livestream of my sessions on Twitch.tv - It will probably be mixed games, and I can't imagine I will get much of an audience but it might be the thing I need to keep me motivated and on the grind. I have a ton of experience with things like this from my time doing Youtube, so I should be able to produce an entertaining channel.

---

I'm giving myself a checklist for this year and I want to use this diary to keep track of it. Below are my goals for 2015

Poker related -

- Supernova on Pokerstars at least once.
- £15,000 in cash game profit between live and online.
- Visit DTD at least once this year.
- Get reinstated at Grovesnor (still waiting for a response!!) so I can play cash at the Luton G and The Vic.
- APAT Bracelet in a limit event
- Play one UKIPT
- Play the GUKPT Luton Main Event
- Stop levelling myself in small cash games. The 70 year old with £50 behind isn't bluff raising the flop.
- Help my sister get to $2/$4 in mixed games online through rigorous coaching and gestapo-like scrutiny.

Life related -

- Go to the doctor and get anxiety medication or at least get checked out for it.
- Stop eating so much shit and do a few pull ups or something.
- At least one holiday with friends somewhere away from poker.

Funny how my life goals are so thin compared to my poker ones. I guess that says a lot. I'll probably add more as this diary progresses. Maybe a couple of easy ones to give myself a false sense of progression.

---

Totally forgot the Genting Poker Link was tonight in Luton. Was keen to play that, but then seeing the same faces (while nice from a comfort point of view and knowing their tendencies) just makes me feel like I'm not progressing anywhere. Rome wasn't build in a day and all that, but playing the same comps in the same club week in week out makes me feel like I am just treading water. I've been playing in Luton for coming on 3 years, and it's time to step the grind up and swing for the fences.

I'm sure I'll change my tune after the first bad online session of the year and decide that online sucks and live cash is better.

GL GL all.

Really enjoying this diary Ransom.  Read it with my morning coffee.  Keep up the good work!

Enjoying too, can't think who you are. We must have played together?

We almost certainly have if you played much at the Luton G last year.

I'm pretty sure I look very similar to the majority of early-mid 20 year olds who play around Luton anyway. If you did a line up like on Buzzcocks and tried to guess which one I was, it'd be harder than you think.

Hello Blonde!

I always laughed at the idea of the 'Doomswitch' on Pokerstars, but this morning I was convinced it was real. Sat down to play some mixed games early doors today and spotted a total random sitting at $5/$10 Razz. Usually it's just the same 8 people trading money back and forth, but I'd never seen this guy before. He was sat with something like $491.54 so I assumed he was in for his whole bankroll seeing as there is never usually heavy action on the stud games at 4am.

I snap sit down, and within 25 minutes his on the table bankroll is over four figures. Managed to drop about 50 big bets to him in the end, despite him constantly calling two cards behind. Miracle wheels and 64s all over the place, and I'm there with my pants down knowing that he's got there again and that I have to call another $10 with a 7643A that's no good.

He obviously locks up and sits out as soon as his run of cards starts to slow, leaving me $500 down before I've even had my toast.

Razz is a horrible game, but it's one of my favorites at the same time. In my opinion it has the softest player pool on Pokerstars - It's the easiest game to figure out the rules to, but people make the most insane mistakes constantly and there are constant waves of people hoping to spin it up all the way up to $3/$6 limit.

I've been taking my losing sessions really well lately. About 4 years go when I first started playing online seriously, I would tilt my beans off if someone binked an Ace on the river. Now not even a wave of anger or frustration. The other week where I amazingly punted £300 into a clearly made 6lo in Super Lowball with an 86 draw I was totally placid. Sometimes progress costs £300, however small of a step it is.

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In the few thousand hands of holdem I've played online this month, I have been relentless with 3betting my small/big blind to button steals, and 4 betting any two cards from a SB/BB resteal and it's finally got my 'won without showdown' line looking fairly respectable now. PokerTracker says I have 3bet 61% of the time to button steals, which I find hilarious. Only a matter of time before people with HUDs and a good sample on me cotton on and just 5 bet shove it in my eye, but for now it's bringing that winrate up. If anyone asked me what adjustment they can make to their cash game play, it would probably be that.

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Played my first live cash session at Aspers Stratford the other day (had an urge for an early morning cash game), and was really excited to play. Despite having to share the train to London with those business types who insist on having a laptop, iPad, blackberry and iPhone all out on the table as if it's some sort of dick swinging contest between them to show how much important 'business' they have to do.

In Aspers I met the embodiment of the stereotypical 'old man coffee' player. He had his coffee, he had his paper, and he had his £45 in red chips which he would protect with his life.

He managed to limp-reraise all in twice (showed AA once, mucked second time), complain about people raising too much, complained about the coffee, complained it was too cold in the poker room and complained about the dealer being too slow.

I guess stereotypes exist for a reason, and I was extremely happy to find Old Man Coffee out in the wild. Keep the grind up mate, someone will fall for your limp re-raise one day and call you off and then you can lock up that £90 until next time.

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I haven't had any interesting nights at work recently so I can't moan on here about the stupid things people ask me for, so It's been fairly heavy on the poker content. For the rest of the day I intend to lurk the Razz lobby on Pokerstars and hope that chap comes back so I can either chunk off another $500 or take it all back. Either that or finally give in to my sisters demands to play Isildur1 at $75/$150 Limit Omaha hi/lo because 'It'll be a good sweat' and 'You might beat him'.

Maybe he will run his luck up to $10/$20 limit so I can get him there. Luck is for losers anyway. 

See you soon!

I'm trying to work out what the min amount for over four figures is.  :P

He was sat with just over $1000 before he sat out. Haven't seen him since. If he's managed to do the smart thing and cash it off I don't really mind, though part of me feels he may have just punted it around Pokerstars.

Tom (Red-Dog) is one of our resident comedians, & I think his point was "over four figures" means five figures......(by the same logic that $1,000 would be "over 3 figures").

He's a clever so & so, eh?

Enjoying the Diary Mr Ransom, nice balance to it, love the little anecdotal stuff.

Note that Red-dog is from Yorkshire, so some allowances must be made, they are strange folk up there.

Good morning Blonde!

So I just booked a week in Vegas for the WSOP. Booked it to coincide with the $1500 Millionaire Maker which looks to be the third best value comp of the summer. 7500 starting stack too which is up from the usual T4500 of previous $1500 events. Nice big field, nice starting stack and structure, nice cool mill-ball for the winner. Only about 10,000 runners to navigate through for the gold. Stranger things have happened I suppose, I mean Jamie Gold won the main event didn't he?

Staying at Circus Circus and the grand total of the trip is £921. I don't really care where I stay as long as it's on the strip somewhere, it's just going to be a base for getting my head down for a few hours each night. The current plan is to take about $10,000 and have some left over to come home with. Being in the green for the trip would just be icing on the cake. I am going to be mainly playing either $1/$3 or $2/$5 cash along with the Millionaire Maker event. If I somehow swing it and luckbox a chunk of cash I might extend the trip for another week.

Excited is not the word for it.

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The Pokerstars run bad continues however. Weathering the storm though, though getting AA in vs AK and losing both runs has taken the wind out of my sales for the day. Turns a straight on the first run, flops trip kings on the second. I think it's revenge for the week I spent playing on 888 last month. Might have to email Lee Jones and ask him to kindly put my boomswitch back on.

LOL Variance, what can you do.

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I am a massive proponent for the use of electronic cigarettes. I started smoking when I was 18, which is a stupid age to start really. I manage to get through all of school without smoking, then on my 18th birthday I went and brought 20 Camel Lights from the all night garage because I was a proud 18 year old and I could. The fact that I had been able to buy fags throughout my school years when the legal age was 16 didn't really cross my mind. I was an adult (in official purposes anyway) and I was going to secretly chuff my lungs out all night in the garden so my mum didn't find out.

I "gave up" in November 2013. I use the term "gave up" loosely because I will still have the odd one when I am out or when I am caught short with no battery or juice for the electric one. I find I can't even finish a whole regular cigarette anymore without feeling sick.  

But with this comes with the debate - Should you be allowed to use them at the poker table?

Personally despite the obnoxious massive electric pipe I carry with me, I really try not to make a show of blowing massive clouds around. I'll blow the 'smoke' under the table or behind me out of the way of other players. Despite it only being water vapor and flavouring on the way out, I can understand why people wouldn't want it near them, and I have no problem not using it if someone asks me not to. Curious to hear other people's thought on the matter.

Given that 20 Marlboro are pushing £10 now, and a bottle of e-liquid can last you 5 days and can be bought online for as little as £1, I am honestly surprised at the amount of people that still smoke.

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Until next time!

Harry / Ransom - "Eagerly awaiting losing an all in flip in the first level of the Millionaire Maker"

Enjoy Vegas! Sounds like a great trip. Have you been before? I like circus circus as I am like my casinos to look like 80s Vegas, although location wise it's a bit nippy.

Keeping up to date with this, always a good read.

Fold aces pre, it's easier and avoids heartache :) least if you get felted with 8 high it don't feel so bad lol

Agree 100% with the bolded part. Poker players get very negative about some aspects of Vegas - "The Rio is shite" & all that.

I spent my working life on the road staying in cheap B & B's & then, later, when I got posh, Travelodges & the like. So when I go to Vegas, even the worst room there beats anything in the UK. And it's Vegas baby, the weather is lovely, the poker is great, what's not to love?   

When I go, my room is used for two things only - sleeping & showering. I'm in it, maybe, 6 hours per day, tops. I'll play a noon tourney, go busto mid-afternoon, & go find another. And another.

Or I'll go rail some WSOP Events, gawp at the faces, chat to my mates, take some photos, write a blog, which I generally do daily. This, to me, is living the poker dream. So yeah, the Hotel room does not bother me much.   

E-Cigs. I'm SO near switching to them. You might just have made the final nudge. Strewth, I loathe myself for smoking, it's s filthy disgusting vice. 

Honestly Tikay if you make the switch to E-cigs, you will wonder how you ever smoked regular ones.

My recommendation would be this kit to start - http://www.ukecigstore.com/e-cigarette-kits/variable-voltage-kits/aspire-nautilus-premium-kit.html

The tank on top is one of the best and most reliable on the market, comes with a bunch of new coil heads (which you only need to change once a month really) and a good long life battery. Easily two straight days of use on a single charge.

Then grab a few bottles of juice here - http://www.onepoundeliquid.com/ - I'd go for 12mg strength to start and either move down if it's making you feel a bit woozy or move up if you feel like it's not strong enough.

Total outlay of £60 to begin with, which is about £25 more expensive than one of the cheap kits you might see in the shops, but in my opinion if you're putting something close to your face every 10 minutes, it's worth buying a reputable brand instead of risking blowing your face off with a unbranded kit from China.

Plus what's a week's worth of Richmond now anyway? About £50? It'll pay for itself within a fortnight which means more cash for comps!

There was a guy in the G (Luton) recently, he wasn't a reg and seemed the sort who would argue over nothing, anyway he had what I can only call a super duper smoke ("it's only vapour") making machine, I'm mean this wasn't the normal sort of e cig that u see, it was not only about 10 inch's long but also had a square box on the end that he held onto like a pipe. I was sitting 2 to his left and he was chugging away on this thing like a new toy, I'd not long been moved to the table but wondered how the guys sitting there were putting up with it, I decided it was because the guy didn't come across as approachable, quite aggressive looking and the chugging added to his demeanour. After about 10 mins I struck up a conversation with the purpose of getting him to stop the chugging or at least not blow the "vapour" and I really use the term loosely in this case away from the table. I said that I had never seen one as big as that before and of course he told me that he had started a business selling them and it was going very well,  I kindly said that he was blowing the vapour over all of us and would he mind blowing it in the air or refrain from doing it at all, at this point I got the standard reply "it's only vapour, it's not harmful in anyway, to anyone". Apart from the fact that this machine was blowing out enough smoke to make my eyes water I've always wondered to myself if in 20 or 30 years time the scientist will be telling us all that more research should have been done before these things were brought to market unregulated, the sort of things that only come out after a generation of people smoking them. Anyway it took less than 5 minutes for the guy to be chugging away again blowing his vapour out of every hole imaginable, shame even the supervisor wouldn't stop him seeing as the casino sell them as well. I felt slightly justified when a few hours later he was having a full blow argument with someone about the exact same thing on a cash table.

Ban them from being smoked inside, vapour or not, they cannot be healthy for you. At least with real cigarettes u know u will get cancer or some other horrible illness and die, with these we must all suffer until someone works out our children will be born with eight fingers and no thumbs.

Great diary Ransom keep it up.

This is the bugger

http://www.ukecigstore.com/vicious-ant-the-variant.html

Have a look at the YouTube video on this page, imagine that sitting next to u at the table!!!!

Tell me that video is a level?

He's like blowing CLOUDS.

It's a level, right?

I urge everyone to watch that, (it's only 50 seconds or so) it's sheer comedy. No, really.

Here you go. Go on, watch it.


YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_c9isQ8M7s

Jesus 250watts?! That's the most unnecessary device I think I've ever seen. Mine goes up to 50watts but setting it higher than 25w makes me cough my lungs up.

There's a community of people who just want to "chuck clouds" as they call it, but you need to actively make a bunch of low resistance coils and make a certain type of juice to achieve that. Looks like the minority might ruin it for the majority once these high powered devices become cheaper. That guy has definitely taken that with him for attention, he was just begging for someone to ask about it so he could talk about his new business.    

I agree that we won't see the full effects of inhaling e-liquid for years, and we all could very well be doing damage to ourselves with it. Inhaling anything other than oxygen over a long period of time isn't going to be any good to you. Though personally I would rather be inhaling nicotine with Vegetable Glycerine rather than nicotine with tar, ammonia, arsenic and countless other nasty stuff.

Maybe children will end up being born with 8 fingers and no thumbs, but I am from Cornwall and I doubt they'd notice down there if they did.

VEGETABLE glycerine? Now you tell me. I don't do Veg. Way too healthy, that stuff.

Cornwall? You have much in common with folks from the Fens & East Anglia, trust me. Can you imagine cross-breeding someone from Cornwall with someone from the Fens? The mind boggles. Or it would.

 ;applause;

In all seriousness I don't know enough about them to make an arguement either way, as u say better Vegetable Glycerine than the other stuff (for now). What Am quite adamant about is that they should be treated like cigarettes in a public place, I shouldn't have to breath in your exhaled vapour. I don't burp in your face.  ;D

think this is my first post on here, always catch up and enjoying it!

im 22 and have never smoked, and dont have an issue with people smoking the E cigs at a poker table. Actually think they smell quite nice, and pleasant. Obviously wouldnt want someone blowing it right into my face  but dont see why people would have an ussie with it

I love Circus Circus - proper retro as someone said before.  The Mrs always makes us stay somewhere she likes but I always make sure I get over to Circus for some low stakes afternoon roulette and beers on a couple of afternoons.

Get on the vaping Tikay - I haven't had a fab for nearly four months since seeing Vinny in Glasgow, feel loads better and makes it so easy, altho obviously just switching addiction

http://www.myfabland.com/

This has proper set me off. I'm going to have to nip across the road for one, haven't had a fab since I was a kid.

Would not surprise me if they're about £2 each now.

Was always a lot more partial to a Feast when I had a pound left of pocket money, nice blue ice pole if my 11 year old coffers were empty.

Talking of Vaping, I see there is a Vaping Bar in Hitchen, not sure if it sells drink but is def a place where people meet and Vape.

There's about 5 in Bedford now. 6 if you count the one that also sells various contraptions "FOR TOBACCO USE ONLY".

One has a cafe inside, but they really like the hard sell of their products which are pretty outrageously priced compared to some of the other vape shops about. If I was going in for a tea and a sandwich I would prefer not to have someone trying to offload some merchandise on me.

Afternoon all,

I have exactly six months before I go to Vegas for the WSOP, and I have already written out two schedules for my trip. Then I have binned them and decided to just go with the flow. Then decided some order was needed and made another one. There is mucho anticipation for it on my end, and it is miles away. I've been doing Google street view up and down the strip all morning and watching Youtube videos of planes landing at LAS airport for most of the afternoon. Sidenote - watching cockpit videos of planes landing in various airports a weird hobby of mine, I don't know how it developed and I wouldn't call myself an aviation enthusiast by any means but I find it fascinating. 

I would appreciate any advice on things to do in Vegas that don't involve poker. Whilst it is a poker trip first and foremost, I would like to know about some weird and wonderful things to do around the area during the early afternoons. I already plan to go shoot some guns at some probably politically incorrect looking paper targets and walk from say the Welcome to Vegas sign to maybe Bellagio and visit Fremont street. I'm not much of a foodie so going to restaurants isn't really my thing, but any recommendations on shows to see would be welcome as well as any interesting places to visit off the beaten track but less than a $40 cab ride round trip away.

I'm like a kid on Christmas Eve. If I'm this excited 6 months away, I am going to be insufferable come the 11th of June in Manchester Airport.

a vaping bar? really?

a place where people go specifically to e-cig?

Go and see a Cirque du Soleil. Its the one thing I havent yet done. Other people can recommend the best ones. Penn & Teller was very good as well.

The Gun Store Las Vegas is a very good shooting range and good prices. Probably looking at $25 cab each way.

Wouldn't walk the sign to the Bellagio, the sign isnt really within Strip walking range. Bellagio to Mandalay Bay is probably a good 30 mins and then from MB to the sign is another 30 mins in a not very nice area. Just take the cab.

If you can afford it, book a trip to the Hoover Dam or the Grand Canyon.

Apparently they are becoming quite popular, abit like shisha down the Edgware Road. Can't reall see them lasting though, unless they offer food and drink (like the cafe Ransom mentions) then the main income will be the selling of merchandise, which I'm sure as everything will be cheaper to get online rather than a bricks and mortar business. Seems a very strange business idea to me but perfect for online. Unless they become the new pubs.

So I got this email -
 

Thank you for your enquiry regarding the reinstatement of your membership with Grosvenor Casinos.

 

We are pleased to inform you that you are now able to visit all Grosvenor Casinos premises.

 

Please remember to take this email with you on your first visit.

 
What a happy day. Be rude not to play today wouldn't it!?

Might just head down the G for the afternoon fold-a-thon as my sleeping pattern is pants. But for now my abusive relationship with Genting is over.

Wait till next week imo as Genting have their £75 and £15k gtee this weekend I think?

GLGL back at the G though...

Already on the train to Luton, but I suppose if the afternoon comp isn't much of anything I could fire one into the comp at Genting this evening.

A sort of parting gift and one more shot at getting even there.

I was wondering why I hadn't seen you at the g for a while now.
Glad you've got yourself back reinstated👍. How did the Saturday lunch time comp go?

Finished in 8th from about 40 total entries. Good fun though, can't moan even though I don't get to add another Luton mincash to my poker CV.

Probably head down to the Monthly next week, you playing?

Good Morning!

I finally get to do a trip report on this blog thanks to my reinstatement at the Luton G. Yeah it's only Luton on a Saturday, and EPT High Roller it ain't, but I'll try my best to pretend it was a super serious comp.

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I get the email saying I am allowed back in the club at about 11am, by 12pm I am already on my way there for a comp that doesn't even start until 2:30. I just wanted to have a little walk around and see if anything was different first, plus I wanted to add some time on to get my membership back. I thought I'd face a few questions and suspicious looks from whoever was on reception at the time and I was bang on. But the chap on reception was good as gold and after a quick call with the customer service manager I was back in the G. Slightly amused that the reception chap had to be all sensitive to 'problem gaming' with me, probably part of his training and he has to do it, but I did feel a bit like a naughty schoolboy being told not to be silly and go on a mad one again.

Walk into the poker room to a booming welcome from Raj and immediately get talked into doing a last longer for a £110 monthly seat.

Bit of an international flavour to this comp once everyone's registered. Good mix of Eastern Europeans, the older players, and a couple of youngsters. And a chap who seems to use the C word twice a sentence who brings a massive whiff of the ganjas to the table with him. Everyone knows, everyone can smell it, nobody says anything.

Comp overlays by about £600 once we begin, with 5 levels of late reg and one re-entry. Raj has already said my re-entry is already waiting. Charming.

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Table 4 wasn't the greatest table draw. Didn't look much for action.  -

Seat 1 - Older chap, literally expect him to limp every hand.
Seat 2 - Brooding quiet middle aged fellow.
Seat 3 - Yours Truly.
Seat 4 - Chatty European lad.
Seat 5 - Guy who's been smoking a joint and has to be asked to move into his correct seat 3 times by the dealer.
Seat 6 - John Hunt, Luton's resident curmudgeon and personally one of my favourite people there.

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Hand One - 25/50

ME (BB)  Ahrt Aspades

UTG limps
Folds around to older chap on button who also limps.
SB limps.
I make it 275.
UTG calls 275.
Button Folds
SB Folds

FLOP

 Qs 9h 4h

Bet 400 into 700, Villain calls.

TURN

 Th

I hate this turn. Hate it hate it hate it. I block the nut flush so I still have some semblance of equity in the hand, but I don't think I can go into check call mode here. Bet 850 into 1500 as a blocker bet really. I want to the river but if I check to him, I don't want to get bombed off the hand and I can fold to any aggro after my bet. Villain calls.

River

 9c

Now I am going into check call mode. He bets 1300 into 2700 (?) and I call. He has  Kd 9d.

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No real interesting hands happened for about an hour and I have a slowly dwindling stack. Down to 6500 by level 75/150. I head to the toilet and come back to John Hunt on a mad one, as he is prone to do, offering the stoned guy outside. Apparently John just open shoved like 30k for some reason and the other guy called it off with AQ and held and celebrated in John's face. Thought spliffs were supposed to chill you out and not have you stacking chips whilst doing jazz hands.

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Hand Two - 75/150

I get  Ahrt 9h in the CO. Raise to 400.

Get 3bet by the Small Blind to 1000. Reluctant call, and online I would either 4bet jam or fold. I don't 4 bet jam because I don't want to give the casino floor the satisfaction of seeing me be the first re-entry on my first visit back.

FLOP

 Ad 5h 6h

About what we were looking for really. Top pair, modest kicker and the nut flush draw. SB leads out 2000, I snap shove for 5500 more. He calls with  Qd Aspades. Bink the  7h on the turn to double back up to starting stack.

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Hand three - blinds 200/400/25

I have  Ad 2d in the BB. MP opens to 1000, CO flats, fold, fold, I defend the BB. Great price, easy enough hand to play.

FLOP

  3d  Ahrt  4h

Top pair, no kicker, backdoor diamond and a wheel draw. Hand is going to be trickier to play than I first thought. MP continues for 1500, and the CO just calls. Given the great price, I can't really fold for like 6/1.

TURN

 9d

Backdoor diamonds in play now, tell myself that if villain bets around 3k and CO folds, I am going to shove the turn. Then change my mind as soon as he bets 3k. CO calls again. Pretty consistent with a flush draw IMO. At this point I feel CO's hand is totally irrelevant and he is going to fold all non heart rivers.

RIVER 

Js

Pretty huge brick all things considered. Doesn't improve many hands on this board texture. Villain snap shoves and has both me and the CO covered. CO insta folds as I expected, and I have to spend a few seconds thinking this through.

Small bet, smallish bet, bomb the river. Has to be a pretty tight value range to be shoving into two people. Don't think he opens small pairs there often, more one to limp them and set mine. AQ-AK probably bet the flop more for value on a two heart board. So at this point I'm thinking AJ is probably the most reasonable hand he can be shoving here for value.

Is he more likely to bluff a missed flush or check give up? Certain that he knows he has to bomb the river if he has been semi bluffing hearts all the way, and he has a small number of AJ combos compared to the Kh-X, Qh-X, 9h Th etc he can be bluffing here.

So I call. He says 'You win'. I show the A2 and then get a couple of weird looks from other players like I am a sticky moron who can't fold top pair. Maybe I am. Now playing about 45k.

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Hand four - 400/800/75 - About 35k in chips.

 7h 7s in BB.

Folds to the CO, older gentleman who opens to 2000. I flat.

FLOP

  9c 7c Qd

Bottom set, bingo. We are getting it on this flop. Set out to just checkraise all in on the guy, but he beats me to it an just overshoves the pot for 15k with a shakey hand. Dealer does to count his chips and doesn't notice I have already snap called 5 seconds ago.

TURN

 7d

Me make quads, and we go to the final table. The chap who's been on the devil's lettuce is on his 6th pint now, and is actually going mental when he wins a pot. Doesn't really bother me, but it's winding up a few of the other players. I'm sure he was just excited to be winning, but it was bordering on excessive celebration. Nobody wants to bust one off the final table and have some geezer in your face dancing the locomotion and waving his hands about.

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Hand 5. Blinds 1k/2k/200. Stack of 45k.

 7s 7c in the BB.

6 spots pay, 8 remaining. Min cash is £80, about £440 for first.

The drunk, stoned, celebrator is now chip leader after just shoving any two paint cards (easier to see when you're pissed I guess) and winning. He's never opening normally, just shoving anything JT or better. Maybe it's sick ICM play and I'm not privy to it.

To me total surprise he jams on me, from the button. I have no intention of folding, I know it's going to be a flip at best but I'm going to stick it in the mixer. He has AK. 

FLOP

 Ad Kh Aspades.

And that's a GG for us. Debated late reg'ing the evening comp, or shooting up Genting's but I decide to call it a night. On my way out I hear the call go out for a 50p/£1 Holdem Cash game. I manage to ignore it and head home.

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Feel free to offer any thoughts or insights into the hands posted! Next stop will probably be the monthly special at the G, if you see me say hello!

Epic report sir, the penman 200x open shove-lose-fight request v stoner being the highlight for me.

Lovely TR. Enjoying your writing very much sir.

Most likely, I'm looking to play at the Vic next week for the GUKPT, But if that doesn't go to plan will be up to play the day 1B. Are you planning on playing at the Vic next week?

I may swing by if I am up and about fairly early, not looking to jump into any big comps though. Need to keep as much of the bankroll back for the Vegas grind in the summer. Cash will be way more reg heavy at the Vic on GUKPT week so I may play the £200 6 Max or something and then have a run to Aspers for cash.

The Six max, is the first tourny I will be playing next week, I'm heading up fairly early (11am), catching the train from bedford. I think i sent you a PM with the details, however not sure if it sent. Welcome to join me on my travels if you feel up for it.

I have to say, when you mentioned that you get hassled at luton station on the graveyard train, I was thinkingi never get hassled there. Fast forward to this evening and not only has someone asked me for a fiver but also can can they have lift home from Bedford station! Mad men

Between about midnight-2am there are always a few characters hanging about the station. The majority are looking to get back to London though so they're on the opposite platform to me usually.

There's almost zero staff presence around the place from 11pm-4am so it always feels a bit dodgy. I usually plan my trip back from the G or Genting so I'm not waiting more than 10 minutes for the next train. After 4am though it's usually fine with all the people making early morning airport runs.

Sorry I missed your PM mate, how did the G go last night?

Good Morning Blonde - or what's left of it. I spend too long writing these and it will probably be about 2pm by the time I post it. All feels a bit like the opening credits from Murder She Wrote.

Nice surprise in the post this morning. £500 tax rebate I was owed for 2012. It's like real life rakeback! Maybe HMRC will patch me up for the WSOP this summer. Shame my TV decided to break this morning and I will have to spend it on a new one, even though I mainly use it for watching Netflix and the odd game of FIFA. Only bought the bloody thing in June for the World Cup, but it's given up on me already. 50 inch model from Tesco with a Slovakian instruction booklet, should have seen it coming really but it was £300 at the time and I couldn't pass it up.

In other news some of you might have seen this in the paper http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/poet-made-kids-sexually-abused-5017175 - I used to live around the corner from this chap before his flat burnt down, and he used to read poems and stories to all the kids on the street in the summer Jackanory style. Never really thought anything was off with him, just seemed like a bloke who liked writing stories and wanted to share them with people. Sadly it was a lot more sinister than that. I have a friend that actually went to his flat a few times when we were about 12-13, makes my stomach turn.

I'm 24 now, but when I was 13 I was allowed out all day alone in the summer and just had to be back in for tea. Can't really see many kids being allowed to do the same these days. In the summer the streets and the massive park around my house were empty. Maybe it's because everyone stays in on the internet now making blog posts to fill the time or because parents won't allow it anymore because of constant news stories like the one above. I'd like to say that if I had children I would force them to go out on their bikes and set fire to some cardboard in the woods like I did rather than have them indoors on their laptop all day, but I couldn't be sure I would be comfortable with it now.

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Poker players have a selective memory. We seem to always forget the hands we've butchered but are very keen to remind others of their cock ups. We remember all of our bad beats, but forget the ones we have dished out and we seems to always have a reason for running daft plays and they only failed because the other guy was a clown and "just couldn't fold his pair".

But this hand still haunts me, so let me paint the scene for you.

Luton G Casino - Friday night £45+5 with £20 add on for 8k. 8k starting stack. £5000 GTD.

The first time I'd ever played the Friday night comp. I used to play live once every few weeks after moving to Bedford, and because I'd heard countless tales about Luton being the last stop before Hell itself, I would book a £30 room at the Easyhotel rather than risk the train home and end up riddled with bullet wounds. While Luton might be the last stop before Hell, the Easyhotel is it's waiting room.

This particular week the guarantee was smashed. About £7000 in the prize pool. We had ran pretty hot in the first few levels and were sat on about 40K at 100/300/50. After break I was relentless preflop, and had almost every 25 ante chip across two tables. Picture for reference -

 (http://i58.tinypic.com/2wr3tyh.png)

We final table on about 200K, which is about a fifth of the chips in play at the time. Middle of the road stack, perfectly comfortable at about 30BB.

We get down to 5 players and we had locked up about £500, with about £2800 up top after paying off the bubble. We have two middle aged women sitting about 5bb each, shortly to be in the blinds. I get dealt AQo UTG. I shove. Even typing that hurts me. I shove 40BB into two shortstacks and two guys who both have me covered.

I load the gun and commit ICM suicide.  I was still new-ish to tourneys after playing cash for most of my life, but "AQ is a pretty good hand 5 ways" went my stupid brain. The two older women are just trying to ladder up and waiting for the other to bust, so they're not calling. The older chap at the table is never calling with worse than AJ or 22-TT. The other guy is an internet kid, who is probably shaking his head at what I had just done. Could have just raised to 20K and gone from there, but I just decided to pile it in.  

I risked 400,000 chips on the final table to win the 25k in the middle. The older guy calls with QQ. We lose, and bust in 5th.

I am hoping by typing it out and sharing it with the world than it's a bit cathartic, like writing a letter to your ex and sending it up in flames in your garden (I was 15 when I did this, hormones get the blame). But you learn from your mistakes.

But I just remembered that I folded AA on the flop after a shove about a month ago live, so maybe I still have a way to go. He had KQ on QJ9 for what it's worth. It's better to make a bad fold than to rip it in with AQ for no reason and cost yourself almost 3 bags I suppose.

Just take your TV back to Tesco and get it replaced/repaired/refunded.

Can't find the receipt for the life of me. Plus the box for it is knackered, and I can't really drag a massive TV up to customer services and ask for a replacement.

I'm just going to write it off if I can't figure out what's wrong with it and fix it myself.

Hello mate, I should be at Luton tonight playing ^^^ said comp, are u going? Gonna be meeting a mate for dinner about 6 at the back of the poker room, your more than welcome to join us.

I got to the station at half 12.... Only waited for six minutes and I was grabbed twice! I chipped up nicely to about 75K at the 400/800 No ante, and then went card dead for about an hour, so got board.... then creative then lost my chips.

Because of the structure we had 22 runners left for about 2 hours........ only top 4 paid up top £600 quid.

About a 75% chance of it, yes.

More in for the cash games on a Friday but I will more than likely jump into the comp.

Usually get there around 6:45pm-7pm on a Friday night so I will probably catch you later on.

Ditto, maybe you can finally sort out my Limo to DTD this time..... :-)

I must know all 3 of you by sight. Likelihood is i'll win again this week so if yr still around at 3am for the start of the final..come pay homage and introduce yourself

That's tough talk right there! Last time I played this comp I chopped it with Les Fenton back in November. Game On!

Will come any say Hi though!

Super fun sweat then!

Probably jump on the 6:15pm fast train to Luton so I'll be in the G for about 6:45.

Catch you guys then. No chops allowed, no checkraising and bet the river because I never have it.

Do you fancy meeting up at starbucks at 6?

Yeah that works out fine, I'll be there in an hour.

I shouldn't look that different to the last time you saw me so I shouldn't be that hard to spot.

Just in case I do (I do wear glasses) and will be in my work clothes.... Trousers and a blue chequered shit, with a grey blackish coat

On my way now, might be a few mins late but shouldn't be long.

Gosh that job must be tough :)

Happy Sunday Blonde!

I was going to write this entry yesterday afternoon, but my brain was just mush after a near 12 hour session of live poker at the G. Very enjoyable evening, and met a few readers of the diary, very nice to meet you all and I look forward to some battles with you on the felt soon!

---

I met Shane (posts here under the name UGOTNUTS) at the Starbucks in Bedford station and we headed to the G after a mad scramble to get on the train in time. Shane didn't have much of a good time on Friday which can be read on his diary here. Mental table from what I hear with a 5 way all in at 50/100 blinds.

I get a fairly comfortable table draw. Not too soft and full of limpers and not too aggro. Nicely balanced, though I feel the Friday night comp brings a more savvy set of player anyway and it was too be expected.

---

Hand one - blinds 25/50.

Hero -  Aspades Jc in MP.

Fold around to me, so I open for 125. I get 3bet by the button to 350. Button is a young player who is more than capable of re-raising light from the button and I am confident he is more likely to do this when blinds are low than when they are high. It's a small 3bet but I elect to 4bet to 850 as AJo isn't a hand I want to play out of position to this guy, and by 4betting I keep the betting lead on the flop. Villain calls 850.

Pot of 1775.

FLOP -  Kh 4s  4d
 
Pretty dry flop, but I c-bet 1100 as was the plan and get a insta-fold which I didn't expect very often. May have just decided to set mine with 88-TT here given against my perceived 4bet range all the money would go in if he did bink a set.

---

Hand two - blinds 50/100

Hero has  Ks Ad on the button.

UTG + 1 opens for 300.
Hero 3bets to 850 on the button.
BB cold calls.
UTG + 1 folds

Pot of 2100.

FLOP -  Kd Kh Js

Checks to me.
I bet 1300.
BB calls.

Pot of 4700 to the turn.

TURN -  8d

I check.
BB bets 1700.
I checkraise to 4000.

If I am going to checkraise here it has to be on the turn. When BB just cold calls, it's a pair almost every time. He's going to check back all rivers that don't make him a full house so the attempt at value has to come here. I think he's unlikely to have a pair bigger than QQ and worse than 99 given that we have two blockers to AA and KK and villain is obviously betting them and we're only realistically losing to JJ. We have an aggro table image anyway so I figured I could get the value with the checkraise on the turn and then evaluate the river and if I could get another bet in depending on the run out.

BB folds and a few seconds later said he has QQ. And the immortal line - "I put you on AK". Everyone puts me on AK. I do usually have AK though.

---

Hand three - blinds 150/300/25 - stack of about 28k from an 8000 starting stack. Still haven't taken the 8k addon either.

Got moved to a new table a couple of hands prior, and this one looked a bit more handy than the last one. Aggro tables make me happy,  they're much more fun to play than the passive ones.

Hero has  Ad 3d on the button.

UTG + 1 opens to 800 with three callers.

We call on the button because we have position and the price is pretty good for a suited ace and we can basically play fit or fold with it. 

Flop is  8c 8s Ahrt.

Checks to me on the button and we bet 2000.
Preflop raiser checkraises ALL IN for the 4000 more.
Everyone else folds.

First thought was he can almost never have an 8 here unless it's pocket 8s, and if that was the case he is way more likely to just call and let me barrel off on the turn. I feel the same thing with AK/AQ, he's more likley to be going for the shove on the turn/river.

I think that I am either winning and the chap has lost his head, or that we both have equally shit Aces and we are going to be chopping this one up by the river.

I call and he has QQ. We hold and take down the pot.

---

Hand four - 600/1200/100. Stack of about 50K.

Hero has  4d 4h.

I open from MP to 2500.
Cut off calls.
Button calls.
BB calls.

FLOP

 4c  Qc 9c

We flop a set, but we're not really loving it with the clubs on board.

We elect to check call a bet of 4000 here, and we end up going 3 ways to the turn.

TURN - such a brick that I can't even remember it.

The turn is such an irrelevant card that it changes nothing. To my massive surprise it checks around.

River -  Jd

Not the best river as any straight draws just got there but that's literally KT only.

The pot is pretty big at this point, and I feel that I have to have the best hand with the passive action on the turn. I shove it in, and get an almost crying call from Glenn who has  Js Jc for the rivered set.

After the hand I think my shove there is abysmal, and I never get called by worse. Should have bet 10-15k and the end result would have just been a call anyway.

That ended our tourney run just before second break, and apart from how I played the river on the last hand, I was fairly happy with it.

---

I jumped straight into cash, and got put directly onto a new table of 50p/£1 that has just opened.

I forgot how many people buy in to 50p/£1 with £20. Personally I think it's sin to buy into a cash game with less than 100bb myself. Almost everyone who buys in short ends up reloading multiple times anyway, so it seems a bit pointless.

Only recognised Yaz on the table, who looked like he was shattered and I said my "Hello"s and my "How are you getting on tonight?"s, and got just a shake of the head back. Say no more!

I played cash from 11:30pm to about 6am. For the first 3 hours at 50p/£1 I could not lose a pot and span my £100 buy in up to about £600. Made me realise how much I love Friday night cash games at the G.

It felt like I could will the dealer into flopping me sets whenever I had a pocket pair, or river me the 3 outer for a straight on the river. Or for people to bet into me when I had the stone cold nuts.

Biggest pot of the night cash wise below.

Hero - £350

I get  6c 2h in the big blind.

Whole table limps for £1. I check my option.

Pot of £8.

FLOP -  9d 6s 2c

SB checks
I bet £5.
3 callers.

Pot of £28.

TURN -  6h

In my head I prayed to Hellmuth for the 6ball and I sort of knew it was coming. You ever get that feeling when you see the card before it even hits the turn/river?

I bet £15
One caller.

Pot £58.

River  Ts

I bet £30.
Get raised to £70.
Reraise to £200 which puts villain all in.

He calls with  Ad 6d.

Someone says "SIX DEUCE REALLY?!", and then I have to remind them that it limped around to my bb and I just checked it pre.

---

Table broke a short while after, and I moved to £1/£2 with £300 after pocketing £200 profit off the last table.

Usually I wouldn't have bothered sitting £1/£2 but Anik has just rolled in tilting his face off after being on the roulette, and Anik in one of his moods will either be very profitable or clean you out. Faint heart never won fair chips or whatever the saying is, so I jumped in. He managed to make short work of his stacks of black chips and I got none of them. Just sort of bled down to about £150 or so and left at 6am.

Ordered a taxi to the train station, and agreed to go halfs on it with someone outside who then proceeded to abuse the taxi driver for some reason. How do you be 40 years old and act like that? I decide to get out and give the driver a few quid extra for putting up with that moron.

Profitable night though, even though my brain was mush the next day.

Thinking about playing the 4pm comp at the G today. Always ran well in it and the structure is pretty deece.

Good luck to all on the Sunday Grind, if you're playing later on let me know!



 

Nirvana nitrolled you with a set of jacks?

Some may call it a nitroll, In my almost never ending endeavour to not make enemies at the G I couldn't possibly comment.

[ author=Ransom link=topic=64630.msg2016449#msg2016449 datementioning03171]

Some may call it a nitroll, In my almost never ending endeavour to not make enemies at the G I couldn't possibly comment.
[/quote]

Snapped it with the obligatory 'i can't fold this'. Tbf i think ransom needed to go all in on the flop in a nod to his hero John 'the pen'.

Well played ransom and nice chatting with you, you have potential :)

As a footnote, can't let friday's post mortem pass without mentioning my cash slip said Position 1 as predicted a page or so ago

"I think I'm behind but I've hit trip jacks on the river...I call...how much is it?"

"Aah, set of fours? That's what I thought you had."

Something like that Ransom? Tell the truth now.

Snapped it with the obligatory 'i can't fold this'. Tbf i think ransom needed to go all in on the flop in a nod to his hero John 'the pen'.

Well played ransom and nice chatting with you, you have potential :)

As a footnote, can't let friday's post mortem pass without mentioning my cash slip said Position 1 as predicted a page or so ago
[/quote]

You actually binked it? Well done sir! Its rare for such a prediction to come true!

You actually binked it? Well done sir! Its rare for such a prediction to come true!
[/quote]

 Can confirm. Saw the champ in the smoking pit close to 4am talking about chopping it like a nit.

You actually binked it? Well done sir! Its rare for such a prediction to come true!
[/quote]

To be fair, when Glenn plays, he wins. That comp is known as the Friday fuckwit, because it's usualyy that fuckwit that wins it.

To be fair, when Glenn plays, he wins. That comp is known as the Friday fuckwit, because it's usualyy that fuckwit that wins it.
[/quote]

Haha. Was feeling confident after position 1 the previous friday too. Would go pro but couldnt live on a bag a week

Haha. Was feeling confident after position 1 the previous friday too. Would go pro but couldnt live on a bag a week
[/quote]

Must be nice.

Busted the comp at 600/1200.

Potentially the most boring comp of my life. Super card dead, almost a whole table full of limp callers and generally very poor showing overall.

On a cash waiting list which could take hours, and I have to be home by 12 as I have bets outstanding on the WWE Royal Rumble with my sister because I don't bet on real sports and what else is there to sweat at 3am on a Sunday night?

I helped a bloke set up his Twitter account years ago, he went on to become one of the most famous wrestlers in the world. Funny how you bump into random people and they go on to clean up in their various fields.

Also went to school with a murderer, so swings and roundabouts.

Loving your reports sir, you make Luton tourneys sound like they almost play out sensibly.

Also, wanted to be the first person on the thread to use the quote facility correcto.

Writing this on the the pain train (remember that from earlier in the thread?!) back to Bedford after a particularly silly cash game hand.

I'm sat on about £280 with KK at .50/£1 with a £2 straddle.

I open to £8.
Big blind 3 bets to £30.
I 4 bet to £65.
BIg blind flats.

Range capped at QQ here for sure. When we are 250bb deep he is going to 5bet shove AA all day.

Flop 643.

He straight shoves for about £150.

I call. He has 62o.
Turn 6.
River 2.

What can you do? Got it in as a favourite and it's all I can ask for. Some of you might have seen me leaving the classroom muttering "fucking unbelievable" to myself however

Evening Blonde!

I have to start work in about half an hour, but thanks to the snow that blasted most of the east cost of the USA earlier this week all of our American clients have cancelled their trips to the UK meaning I should have a nice stress free night. Up until about 6am when the grouchy UK guys start to wake up and make outrageous demands that go against the laws of physics. You can't make a car that's 15 minutes away get to you in 5 minutes. It's not possible, I can't do it, stop asking.

---

I am going to have to cut down on the amount of tournaments I'm playing in Luton for the next few months to make sure the Las Vegas bankroll is solid. I can imagine there's no worse feeling for a poker player than getting to the WSOP and realising that you don't have enough money to play what you want to play.

I plan on sticking to the cash games though for as long as the usual suspects will continue to splash about. £1/£2 is becoming more popular than the 50p/£1 now in Luton, and I never thought I'd see the day. There was a table of £1/£2 that was running from Friday night through to Sunday morning last weekend, which is great for cash action. Will be swinging by at 8am after a good nights sleep to have a go at those who are knackered and hungover at some point soon.

Awaiting the WSOP 2015 schedule to properly plan my events, but for now it looks like I am in the $1500 Monster Stack for sure. Turns out I booked the wrong dates and will miss the Millionaire Maker, but the Monster Stack has a 7 figure first prize anyway so it's not that much of a big deal for me.

Those Luton comps might be £40 a go on average, but with train fair/taxi/dinner and re-entries it all adds up over the months and grinding 7 hours for a £100 cash is just not on my radar anymore. Especially when people are just gifting 100bb pots at cash games still. I would rather save the £2000 it would cost in total to play them and just have 12 extra buyins for $1/$3 cash games.

Not sure of the process of getting a bundle of cash on the plane without any weird questions. I suppose if my flight ticket says Las Vegas they will put two and two together, but what would be the best way to get $10,000 from my bank to cash to my hotel room safe with the minimum of fuss? Just bundle it up and stick it in my carry on? Half and half? Use my bank card? Currency exchange in the airport on arrival? 10 bags is probably a pittance for most airport workers dealing with Vegas tourists, but it would be handy to know.

don't get at the airport.

use a company like FairFX who deliver it via secure delivery, or go into London and use Covent Garden FX IMO.

10k is fine.  you are allowed 10k dead without declaring it when arriving into vegas. 

its always been fine in my carry on bag.  don't think many mugger operate on aeroplanes.

If you change at the airport today you could easily be getting 1.40 when you could be getting 1.50. To spell that out, it is the difference between getting $10k for £6666 or £7142.

Not a personal comment aimed at you, it is very common amongst poker players. They will cut back on dinners and then give a monkey away on foreign exchange malpractice.

If it were me, I'd rather save a monkey in foreign exchange and enjoy several dinners with it instead.

The rest of it is standard - you can take $10k hassle free, but don't be casual about it. A penny over and you could in theory have it seized. Cooperate fully and try and have receipts/paperwork which proves it is legally yours. 5k in each pocket is fine to get there. $1k chips are easier on your pocket when there.

Evening Blonde!

I am currently in the middle of the most tilting session of my entire poker 'career'. The losses are $50 which is bugger all really, but I have won exactly one pot at showdown in the past 4 hours.

I'm playing $1/$2 Razz to get my Pokerstars VIP status up before it resets my VPPs for the month. It's like printing money 9 out of 10 times, but tonight I cannot win a pot. Bricking every single hand, losing to people who can't lay down J-2-3-T-8-8 when I am showing X-X-3-4-8-K-X (even though I managed to double pair). Almost every hand is unplayable, A-5-Q, 8-7-J, 6-5-6, A-8-A.

I have been in a 4 hour war with this chap from Brazil who never folds. Will defend a King up, and he has managed to get there every single time. I make a 75, he makes a 65. I have 2-3-4-5 and brick it all, and he wins with the 9 lo. Everyone who I have tagged as a 'Fun Player' seems to be on the world's biggest upswing courtesy of the bank of Ransom.

I'm getting the VIP points which is what I am after, my losses can be erased fairly easily, but it's the frustration of not winning a pot I am a huge favourite in every single time. Having to fold the 86 you made on 5th street because matey from Sao Paulo is raising you and you know he's made another 6 lo somehow.

I lost a near on £500 pot at cash this time last week, and was nowhere near as irritated. I am literally sweating spinal fluid over about £30. I'll get a $50 VIP Store credit shortly to cover the losses, but that just feels like cheating. Woe is me. Had a winning day yesterday, funny how that's the first thing you forget when you're on a bad one.

Today's graph for Razz is below. Using FreePokerDB for it, because no other tracking programs support Stud games. It looks like it's from the 90s and performs like it too.

(http://i61.tinypic.com/6712rk.png)

The say in hell you play Razz. You start with A-2-3-4 and get dealt K-K-K. Makes me want to live a pure Christian life. Shame degeneracy is such fun.

 

No Updates in a while Ransom! Was enjoying your writing! ;-)

Hello Blonde!

It's been a while! A combo of hardly anything interesting happening, a laptop with a knackered charger and a crippling illness have kept me away. A cold counts for a crippling illness right?

I find that when I play poker live, it's about 3/1 that I end up with a cold in the next few days. All those people in close proximity, passing chips and cards between each other. It's effectively a nuclear bomb to my weak immune system. I have survived car crashes, tumbles down a cliffside and a couple of late night kebab van kickings with barely a scratch. But cough in my direction and I am bedridden for a week choking down lemsip and sneezing into enough tissues that anyone going into my bedroom would think I was a chronic masturbator.

---

My last poker trip was last Monday. Headed to the Vic in the afternoon for some cash action with a plan to play at the Luton G in the evening.

Get into the cardroom at about 2:30pm, with £300 and a dream. Check the lists for games running, and there is one table of £1/£1, one table of £1/£2, and a £5/£10. Put my name on the £1/£1 and £1/£2 and decided to just sit whatever got called first.

First person I clap eyes on was Charlie Carrel. The guy is such a sicko. Heard he took a £60K PLO pot at the Vic that week, and won the Sunday $500 on Stars that week also. Not too shabby for a chap who started at the micros in 2013. I hoped that if I rubbed shoulders with him, then I might get a bit of the magic run good dust on me and I would take down some juicy pots. He was on the £5/£10 or something though so no such luck.

Got called for the £1/£2 and was in for £200. Was up some, then down some, then somehow managed to get it in with 88 vs ATo against a loose passive Indian chap and turn a straight after the 567 flop. All in all we made about £50 profit from the 3 hour session at The Vic. When I go to the cage to cash out my meager winnings, some kid who looks like he's not even old enough to be in a cardroom dumps £16,000 in chips on the counter. What a life.

If there's one thing I hate the most, it's the rush hour trains from London to Luton/Bedford. Packed in like sardines, everyone trying to look more important than everyone else in their suits with their ties done up to eleven, looking miserable as fuck on their way back to their two bedroom house in St Albans where they have to deal with their wives and kids until the rat race starts again at 6am. Just looking at them on that train makes me realise that the 9-5 lifestyle is not for me.

---

I get to the Luton G at about 7pm for the £30+£5 comp with a 30k starting stack. I have been vocal about how I feel about these smaller comps that get 20-50 runners having massive starting stacks, but this one seemed to be structured well enough that after the initial 4x30 minute levels everything leveled out nicely.

Managed to dust off the first 30k bullet within 6 minutes. I think it's a record for the most big blinds spewed in the first level.

4 handed table - We have  Ad Kd - blinds 25/50.

UTG opens to 200.
Button Calls.
We 3bet to 700.
UTG folds.
Button 4bets to 3000. - I have history with this player, and I am convinced he thinks I'm just an aggro internet kid who constantly 3to5 bets every hand. Does not like me at all.
We reraise to 7000.
He makes it 12000.
We shove for 32000.
He calls.
He has  Ac Aspades.

We turn a diamond sweat but brick it and end up with about 800 left behind which we spin up to about 6k but dust off quickly. It was pretty well played by him, I feel he was anticipating my 3bet so by calling he keeps his range super wide and I just level the arse off myself.

---

I promised Scott I would post a hand we played but I have forgotten it despite me promising not to. Sorry mate, if you remember it stick it in.

---

I have this thing I like to call "Red Light/Green Light". This might make me seem like a nutter who thinks he has magic poker powers - but when something doesn't make sense in a hand, I will get an image of a set of traffic lights with the green light flashing - the more it flashes, the more suspect I feel the play is . I'm not sure if this is something other players experience, but it has served me well over the years in making some really thin hero calls. It's basically my bullshit alarm, and it's got a pretty high success rate.

We open  Kd Jc from the Hijack at 400/800/100. Called from the button.

Flop  Td 5d 3s.

We bet around 2k, and get snap shoved on for like 18k. On goes the green light.

Villain has been chatting about wanting to "outplay me like I outplayed him" (I think I 3bet shoved the river with T7 for a turned top pair and he folded - another Green Light moment)

I do a little speechplay about how I must have the best hand. I convinced myself I did, and make the call with King High with two cards to come.

He has  4h  6h for the up and downer.

Binks the  6c on the turn.

We return the binkage by smacking the  Js on the river.

Many times we get this in drawing quite thin, but on this occasion we look like a mad poker Uri Geller. Spoons to table one.

---

Blinds are 4000/8000/1000, and Andy Lyew takes position on me. Andy is the player I have the most history with, and the unfortunate honor of losing flips to me all the time. I've got to know him quite well after we got sat next to each other for about 8 comps running in 2013. He knows that I know that he knows that I know and so on...much more fun and I always enjoy our battles.

I have about 100K at this point after losing a 70k all in to a flush draw that turned top pair. Andy opens to 16000 UTG.

I have  4h 5h in the BB.

I know he is capable of making some possibly too tight laydowns after opening. I also know he is capable of opening extremely light with a shortish stack (we both have about 100k). So I pile the chips in. I regret it almost immediately. I pictured him just tank folding, he's done it to me tons of times.

He snaps my neck with  Kd Qs.

Flop Qxx
Turn 4
River is bullshit because we didn't win.

Andy is my Scooby Doo type nemesis in the sense that we seem to always be tangled up in pots for the sake of playing pots with each other. Jamming 45hh though? I would have gotten away with it....

---

Sat at 50p/£1 cash for a bit, super boring game. Got talked into DC. Lost £100 - most of it in a 6card Omaha hand where we have middle set, King blockers to broadway and the nut flush draw. River is the only king that would make broadway without giving me the nut flush. We check - he pots £55 - we curse our luck and fold.

Total damage for the day -£200.
Train fare back from London because I bought an Off Peak ticket - £14.50.
Cost of Lemsip, Sinex and Strepsils - £8.
Calling King high and being right - PRICELESS.

Is that trip to The Vic ever going to be +EV?

Afternoons there seemed to be full of the old school nits who are just racking up the hours to get into the freeroll.

Not really IMO.

We get almost zero table selection, and poker in London during the afternoons is mainly people jumping from cardroom to cardroom to rack up loyalty points. On this occasion it wasn't all that bad, fairly typical £1/£2 fare. 5xbb open, 3 players to a flop etc. Middle aged Indian chap I mentioned was the oldest one there at that time.

If I went 50 times at 2pm, I know I would spend most of those hours trying to get blood from a 75 year old stone.

I know I'm not one to talk about stacking off with AK, but you got played about 1280 bb in the middle with the big drawing hand!

I know it's just a 30 quid fun comp..... Maybe I'm just being a nit

Yeah assuming a Luton reg is capable of a 6bet bluff was a tad optimistic!

A most entertaining & enjoyable report from Luton, & I especially enjoyed this....


Many times we get this in drawing quite thin, but on this occasion we look like a mad poker Uri Geller. Spoons to table one.

Happy Friday Blonde!

My trip to the WSOP is inching ever closer. As usual my "Do now, ask questions later"  maverick approach to things has made things difficult for me. Three of the girls at work have already put holiday requests in for the same block of June. Part of me feels my plans for world domination, gold bracelets and Dollar Dollar bills are far more important than their trip to Magaluf to drink industrial chemicals passed off as summery cocktails and late night encounters with lads from County Durham called "Gaz",  I blame myself for not snap booking it off. It's a few months away, but we have already downsized our team this past month and there's only one other nightshift guy so it could be problematic.

I think my days are numbered at this job anyway. It's money for old rope, but I sit around doing nothing for 7 hours of an 8 hour shift and it won't be long before they realise they can pay someone to make an iPhone app that does my job for them.

Still the combination of Chinese New Year, half term in England and almost none of these corporate types working Saturdays means I should have a very quiet shift tonight.
---

I will be in Vegas from the 11th-18th of June, and I am set to play the $1500 Monster Stack to start with. The aforementioned maverick approach to planning things without thinking makes me feel my time there would be better spent elsewhere. It's a 5 day event, meaning should I be so fortunate to make the final table, I would have spend almost all of my time there in the Rio in the same comp. If that happened I would cash big enough to stay longer though, and I could leave my boring job.

If I bust day one or day two, it's not that big of a deal as I have plenty of time to go and do other things. If I min cash though, I've effectively spent half my trip in the same comp, and not made enough money to extend the trip at the expense of my job. Bit of a dilemma really. I want the shot at the gold, but I also just want to do Vegas things like play 25cent Video poker, low limit mixed games and walk around Fremont Street taking selfies with dancers while pissed out of my tree.

---

My friends have now cottened on to my poker playing, and are very keen about my Vegas trip. They're clueless enough to think that going to the World Series Of Poker means you are automatically on TV making $100,000 real money bets each hand. My ex-girlfriend was told that I was on EPT on Channel 4 by someone, which never happened but I haven't corrected her. I'd rather let her think I was balling rather than a Luton G punter for now.

Though I have had the following exchange with three people this week. - "So if I gave you £100, could you turn it into £1000 for me in Vegas?" - Trying to explain that they would have better luck sticking it on a split on Roulette is the most tilting thing.

Trying to explain poker to a non poker player is infuriating. For those who understand it, nothing needs to be said. For those who don't, nothing can be said to change their opinion.

---

Haven't had much poker action this week at all. Spent an evening sweating Shane/UGotNuts in his UKPC Mini online and trying offer insight where I could. I expected the play to be more standard as far as online play goes, but it was exactly how a £100 comp would play out live. Lots of limping, 3 people overcalling an open raise etc.

Quite unfortunate not to go into Day 2 Live with a lot of chips, as I feel the table was absurdly soft and full of passive players he had position on, and only a couple of nits behind him. I would have been in for it as well if the new PartyPoker software didn't seem to lock up my laptop everytime the action was on me. Shame really because I would love to punt those satellites.

I have no plans set in stone for any comps now until the summer. I will jump in the occasional one at the G I imagine and I am still about 80% to play an APAT schedule in a couple of weeks. But for now all I am thinking about is Vegas and the fucking Mirage.

We were overdue a Rounders reference.

See you soon!

If I bust day one or day two, it's not that big of a deal as I have plenty of time to go and do other things. If I min cash though, I've effectively spent half my trip in the same comp

I min cashed this last year, was late into day 2.

Evening Blonde, I trust you are all well and dragging in huge pots on the regular.

I have been invited to a pub poker game tonight - I am working at midnight and anyone who's played with me will confirm I like my poker loud and alcohol fueled, it would be a recipe for disaster, but I am going to tag along the next time I am free for it. It'd be nice to just play in a relaxed environment with the focus on having a laugh and not just be out to try and take souls from the unsuspecting.

I used to play in those games when I was hurting for a bankroll when I was living in Cornwall. £5 freezeout and a 10p/10p cash game in the corner away from prying eyes and anyone who might fancy their shot at being a do gooder and reporting it to whatever authority crack down on £20 buy in cash games in shitty Cornish pubs. Trying to squeeze an 11th player onto a table, self dealing with one eye closed for focus after one too many and getting through 6 decks of pound shop paper playing cards. Fold up tables, debates over the difference between a set and trips, and the miserable old nit telling us about the time he played in the Plymouth G Casino as if it was Binion's in the 1980s.

I get a massive pang of nostalgia thinking about it. Every time I start to feel a bit of tilt coming on, I think back to these backward little games and remember poker is supposed to be fun.

--

Not sure if I have mentioned this previously but my first experience of poker was in Belgium. I went on a school trip for my History GCSE to visit sites from the first World War. Ypres, Passchendaele and the like. For a trip that was supposed to boost my knowledge of trench warfare and The Battle of Le Cateau, it was really the start of my poker education.

Me and a couple of friends went on this trip under the guise of smuggling back as many little firecrackers as we could get into our bags. We were willing to endure tours around old battlefields as long as we got half an hour to fill our pockets with small explosives, and if we could get served for beer as well, all the better. We do the touristy things and visit the Last Post at Menin Gate before finding a shop that would sell us both beer and enough munitions to take over Jersey. Also throw a pack of porno playing cards into the mix as well, because we were drawn to boobs like moths to a flame as most 16 year olds are.

Returning to our hotel 200 Euros lighter between the three of us (massive stacks for a 16 year old on £3.25 an hour working as a waiter) we decided to drink our 12 cans of Jupiler, play poker and bet using these firecrackers. I was the only one who knew the rules well enough to get the game flowing. 1 firecracker/2 firecracker blinds, no limit holdem. The big sticks that resembled Dynamite we had counted as 10. I remember ripping a huge overbet shove on the river, and getting a fold. Even back then I was aggro as you like.

I managed to walk out a large winner, if only by default because I knew the hand rankings and the other two lads just went with it. The game was open to much manipulation, but I was the proud owner of about 300 small fireworks. They sat in my wardrobe for over a year until I sold a shoebox full to a kid from the estate for £20, who threw one into the traffic outside school and got expelled.

---

I played on a free to play site called TripleJack for ages around 2006/2007. It's still open, but it's completely void of traffic these days. I put massive volume into it, despite there being no reward other than raising your level and getting little badges next to your avatar for things like making a straight flush or winning a comp. I stayed up all night playing PLO for play money, and then I would go to school/6th form for 7 hours, and then play more in the evenings. I probably averaged about 4 hours of sleep a night for 3 months.

Once I got into 6th Form, EMA was still a thing. If your household income was shit enough, you'd get £30 a week to go to school. Being in the poorest area of Cornwall, we were all on it. And while everyone spent it on fags and alcohol, I made deposits on SkyPoker. £30 a week for a month. £120 and my first proper bankroll. It lasted about 5 days. Jumping into £20NL after playing play money games for a year, to be expected.

That trip to bustoville basically killed my like for poker for a while. I didn't get back into the game until I was 20, with an awful job serving sausage rolls at Cornwall's Seal Sanctuary. Someone told me they were going to a £5 game in the pub, and asked if I wanted to come.

Funny how things come full circle when you least expect it. While I'm not exactly setting the world on fire playing £30-£100 comps at the G with the odd night of 50p/£1 or £1/£2, I'm having fun. Maybe one day someone will ask if I fancy a go in the Monday Madness in Luton for £30 after I get the lot.

---

Massive trip down memory lane, but it puts my poker timeline into a lot of perspective. While there are sick kids going from $5 SnGs to $5000NL in a year, going from playing in a pub in 2010 to the World Series this summer isn't so bad.

VAMOS!

Excellent diary imo ransom.

Haha very good, hope you win the world in Vegas and if not have a great time mate

Yeah huge diary fan too I must say.

Big + 1

You playing the APAT World's at Aspers Stratford I guess, loads of mixed games?

Thanks for the kind words everyone, as long as you are enjoying the diary, I will keep updating it.


I plan on heading down, though I know a lot of the mixed games are capped at 50-60 runners and I imagine a lot of the APAT regulars will have pre-registered for most of the events if they're chasing leaderboard points. I think one of the Razz/HORSE/DC events is overlapping with the PLO/8 or the PLO4/5/6 so there should be open spaces in it given how PLO8 and 4/5/6 is insanely popular right now.

I reckon on mixed game days they will put on some DC as well. Given it's the APAT it shouldn't play huge like the £5/£5 DC you get in London.

Morning Blonde!

4:30am - Bad weather in the USA means that flights are either hours delayed or cancelled entirely. This usually means I am on two phones at once to a bunch of miserable executives in the USA trying to re-arrange things for them (because making a phone call to American Express business transport directly is apparently too much of a menial task and they'd rather delegate it to me), but silence is golden as the song goes. Maybe they have frozen or been caught in some sort of monsoon. Not enough to kill them or inflict serious harm or anything, just enough to take away their phone signal and 3G so they can't email things in until I finish at 8am.

I debated making a really quick run to the G before work. Had a tip off about someone with deep pockets and a shallow poker mind who was looking for a cash game, but I felt that if I won a big pot I would snap tell my boss to piss off, stay the night and end up trying to grind out a living off £30 comps and £1/£2 cash in Luton. It would be a life of Super Noodles and tea without milk.

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I logged into SkyPoker for the first time in about a year after writing about it in yesterdays entry. Turns out I had about £105 in my account still. I set myself a challenge to run it up over the next few months, and gave up after realising the reason I don't play on there anymore is because the software runs like hell on my laptop. Still took second in a £5.50 heads up comp this evening which was OK, and has paid for my order of e-cig juice for the next month.

You can tell SkyPoker is an English facing site with the sheer amount of limp/calling that goes on. If the software ran smoother for me, and the time bank was longer, I would add it to the list of sites I play regularly. I imagine it gets extremely reggy when you play .50/£1 and above.

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I have been thinking about things that could improve poker in Luton in general recently, and I would love to see them finally get that livestream table working. Poker streams are massive right now. Jason Somerville has just been signed to PokerStars Team Pro through his video content on Youtube and his livestreams on Twitch.tv - If the G could get their feature table livestreamed a couple of times a month, it would bring a large amount of attention to the cardroom for being the only one in the UK doing it.

The logistics of it could be more difficult than I am imagining and it's going to be harder than just plugging wires in and connecting it to the internet - but get a good £1/£2 game going, stick it online, and people will come from miles around to get on it. The table is RFID capable so hole cards can be shown on a delay, couple of people on commentary (I commentated gaming events for like 2 years, nudge nudge) and it'd be golden.

I would also love to get a good limit mixed game going, though I can't imagine there would be many takers for £5/£10 limit or something. The DC is good as it is, but so many games are missing because they don't fit well with the pot limit structure. I've been calling for Badugi, 2-7 Triple Draw, Baduci/Badacey and regular Stud/8 limit for ages. £200 buy in for 20 big bets would last you a while and the limit structure would make it slightly less intimidating for those who don't want to tangle with any of the many insane Friday night regulars. £6-£7 an hour on the time charge, would be fun. Massive towers of £1 ante chips too.

While the Luton G is my favourite venue, I'm sure many will agree that the cash games there are infested with regs. Getting new players in would be beneficial to everyone involved IMO.

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My phone is ringing, it's a call from Singapore. Last time they called they wanted someone pick up a suit from a hotel and drive it to a conference centre 45 minutes away because someone needed it for a business meeting. Apparently you don't even need to know how to dress yourself to get a job as an Executive these days.

Also the dress is Gold and White.

Run Good!

When they first got that table they had it streamed up on the GUKPT website.  Once GUKPT finished they still had the stream running for a few months but only had the comps on there, never cash.  I assume it probably would just be a matter of plugging it back in and getting the RFID deck back out!  Could be completely wrong though.

Good morning Blonde!

I am currently on shift, and just over halfway through a 12 hour stint. On the plus side, I fell asleep from 1am until 6am and nobody called in so today is off to a slightly winning start. Which is handy as I haven't been winning much of anything lately. Taking all losses in a positive light though - they're temporary losses in my mind. With more effort and wiser play, fortunes should change. Which is probably the first line of the gambling addict's charter.

I do have a tendency to just slack off and autopilot during comps. Cash games, not so much. I keep saying I'm going to cut down on the local casino comps, but having said that I headed down to the G on Friday with Shane/UGOTNUTS to play the £5k GTD.

I always preach about bankroll management, and despite being a huge bankroll nit myself I went down with my case £150. Not busto, just awaiting my new bank card to replace the one that expired at the start of March. Enough for 2x buyin and 2x addon should I need the second bullet, and the taxi home.

It looked to be a quiet Friday, with 11 entries on the board 20 minutes before it was due to kick off. Table draw was interesting, 7 handed and I had never played with any of these people before. One was a Luton Reg (chap that wears the LUTON WINNER jacket), but we had never managed to cross paths in the 2/3 years I have been playing there.

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Hand One - Blinds 50/100

We have As Jd.

We open to 250 on the Button.
Called by the BB. Has an iPad out, but isn't using it so we can assume he's paying attention for the most part.

FLOP -  9d 8d 9h

We c-bet 450 and get quickly called. It's a board that hits his range better than ours in theory, but I feel at this stage he is going to defend his blinds reasonably wide. Lots of draw combos he can potentially have, so I don't plan on slowing down on the turn unless it's like the Qd or something.

TURN -  3s

Couldn't have been a bigger brick really, but we get led into for ~1500. If he had a 9 here, he's so massive that donk leading this turn just folds out all my potential double barrels. I don't feel he is representing anything credible so I call.

River -  4h

Everything bricks out. We get led into again for 3600. This is almost 60% of our remaining stack. I have to spend a minute playing "What's More Likely?". Is he more likely to bet the turn with a missed draw and try and take it down seeing as I'm cbetting that board like 99% of the time? Or is he more likely to check and hope I check back so he can try and make his draw with a free card? Is he more likely to bet the river again when everything bricks out, or is he more likely to check and give up?

I decide that the line he has taken is just not representing anything as strong as he is suggesting, and I doubt this player is capable of Range Merging  5s 5h or something. 

I call. He says "Ten High", I say "Ace High". He mucks, I soak up rapturous applause, and both massage girls start rubbing me down at the same time. Jeff Kimber comes in and says "Mate, you take my spot as a Grovesnor  pro because I'm not worthy after that sickness", and Paul Newey immediately puts me into a full schedule of EPT Super High Rollers*.

*May or may not have happened

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Hand two -

Blinds 50/100.

We have  Jc Jh UTG.

We open to 400 with 2 callers.

Flop -  Jd 3c 4c

Pretty great flop for us, we cbet for 1100. Get one caller.

Turn is the  8s

We bet 1600, and get snap minraised to 3200. In my experience, a turn minraise is the stone cold nuts. But we have the nuts at this point, so I was both rubbing my greedy little hands at the prospect of adding 8k to my stack and slightly confused about what he could have. Bottom set? Can't have top pair, top kicker with the flush draw as we block the Jc.

I go ahead and stick him in for his last 3800 or so, and he folds reasonably quickly. Probably just an attempt at a fast one. A gentleman says I should have probably just called with top set, but then I have to check the river to him and hope he bets all brick rivers. If he was folding to a turn shove, he was folding the majority of rivers also. Given he had over half his stack in the pot on the turn, I was about 90% sure he had committed himself.

---

Hand three -

75/150 Blinds.

We are on the button with  9h 9s.

Open from MP to 500. It's Yaz - I already know he's raise/folding about 90% of the time here.
CO makes it 2500 - has about 3k behind and can't really fold to a 4bet.
We make it 5500 - I think flatting is going to be the worst move here. It just entices Yaz to call, and even in position, I'm not going to be too comfortable on the majority of flops. CO can just shove into us if Yaz checks. I want to isolate and run the board out all in. We might be behind, but we make no mistakes post flop if we just get it in pre.

Yaz does the pained fold dance, as I expected and we get called by  Aspades Qs.

Board is  Js Ts 4h -

9h 9s   39.29%
As Qs   60.71%   - It's always interesting to be ahead but not a favorite.

Turn is the 6h, but the river is the 2s. Never mind. I feel that we barely got away with flipping it, and 4betting 9h 9s was a bit of a mistake.

---

Hand four -

Blinds 100/200/25

We have  Ahrt 5h in the HJ.
Shane had just been moved to our table and is UTG, and is on his second bullet after a reportedly awful first attempt.

Shane opens UTG all in for about 4500 or so.

I know that Shane is likely to rip it in wide when down to 10-15bb. I feel I am ahead of this range more often than not with A5hh. Even UTG, I think that all broadway combos are possible here, as well as things like 9d Td.

I attempt to isolate and 3bet to 9500. I have 4k behind. It's the Moorman move. We're effectively all in, without being all in. It looks like we might be trying to induce someone else to shove over us with a monster also.

Doesn't work, as we get 4bet shoved on by the small blind, so we have to call anyway.

 Ahrt 5h vs  9h 9s vs Shane's  Aspades Ac.

We flop a flush draw, but miss it and bust out in hilarious fashion.

Slight miscalculation, and apparently someone thought I was chip dumping to Shane and made a fuss over it. They must not have played with me before, and encountered my weird preflop logic that if it was visualized on the big screen, it would look like I was living in the matrix. If I ever was going to chip dump to someone, I would probably make sure that I didn't have to expose my hand to the whole table.

--------------INTERMISSION--------------

I was going to Rebuy, but after spending money to get to the casino and getting a couple of drinks, I had about £40 on me. It was go home time. Or.....BLACKJACK SPIN UP!

I am not a huge 'gambler' in any sense. I don't really enjoy pit games other than shouty aggressive Asian style baccarat, and I haven't played any non poker games since September. I'm not one to press my luck or believe in 'hot streaks', but this was the only way of getting back in the comp other than borrowing money which is something I've never done at poker and would like to keep it that way.

Stick £20 on. Make 20 vs a Dealers 17.
+£20 for a total of £50.
Decide I am freerolling the next bet, and go for one more £20 spin.
Make 19 vs a dealer bust, and we're back in the game.

Cash a £10 credit out from my G reward card, and use it as a partial buy in.

Felt amazingly degenerate going through all this fuss to buy back in, but it's nice when a plan comes together.

---

Blinds 300/600/50

Ad 9h in the big blind. We have about 9k behind after losing a smallish pot with two pair to a turned set of Jacks, and raise folding a couple of times.

Opener from the cut off makes it 1200.

I decide that I am shoving over the top of it if it folds around, which it does. We stick it in the mixer, and get called quickly by  Aspades Kd.

Nothing for us on the flop/turn or river and we quietly make our exit.

---

It's a weird feeling being in a cardroom and not having any cash on you to play. I felt as if the bouncers were going to ask to see my wallet, and when they saw I didn't have enough to buy in for cash games that they would assume I was a vagrant taking advantage of the free tea and coffee or something and sling me out.

I'm probably about -£2000 for the year so far. Which is fairly small beans, not because I'm a high roller, but it's a couple of good sessions and we're back in the green. Funny how my non poker friends hear about this, and want to chastise me and tell me about the great holiday I could have gone on or the cool things I could have bought with that money. Funny how being down two bags for the year makes me some sort of problem gambler, but having two solid winning years on the bounce means I should "quit when I am ahead".

I can't win. Which seems to echo my recent tourney runs/cash game endeavours, strangely fitting.

We will just have to get it next time!

GL GL!

Hello Blonde!

Haven't done an update in a while. That's a combination of being ill again, and doing absolutely nothing of note in the past two weeks. If you asked me to recount three events I remember since the 10th of March, I couldn't tell you. It's all blank. Just a blur of work and watching Jason Somerville's live stream until I pass out and it all begins again.

Don't really want to force the diary updates so that it becomes one 'interesting' update and 4 shit ones of me trying to keep this running. This diary is as much for me to follow my progress as it is for everyone else, and if I had to read my nonsense ramblings every day with pointless words words words, I'd be very bored.

---

I did however head down to the Luton G on Saturday, after missing the rake race again. About £23,000 in the prize pool this time, and I found out it was on about 15 minutes too late. I seem to live in a perpetual fantasy world where I need explicit instructions and about 2 days notice with texts and Outlook calender invites before I can get things into my head.

Went down for the evening £35+5 £2000 Guarantee, and I haven't seen the poker room as busy as it was in quite some time. 3 cash tables, a sit and go and 4 full tables left in the rake race comp at 7pm. And a line waiting to reg the evening one as well. Poker room at capacity, and not enough dealers to cover the tables.

Not quite as mental as last year when Day 2 of the £100 monthly and the regional pub poker final were both on at the same time, and we ended up with self dealt tables on the casino floor, but still very busy. Massive props to the cardroom staff, because it would have taken me a while to even realise they were short staffed as things ran as smoothly as they always do.

Because of the lack of dealers and tables, we got a 10 handed comp for a few hours until enough of the field were whittled down. 10 handed deep stacked poker with no antes - it's about as enjoyable as it sounds.

I figure I am just going to be a nit when it's 10 handed, and with no antes at all there is no need to be contesting for pots as aggressively as I usually would.

---

First hand of the comp we get  Jd Jh UTG. Open to 150.

3 callers. Flop  Js 8d 6c

Couldn't have asked for more. Continue for 450. One caller.

Turn   4h

Don't have the nuts anymore but I am still very happy. Bet 600 and quickly called.

River  7s

I'm intending to check call, which I do for 1100, and get shown a straight. Called down by  8h 5c. Thank god for the 2k early bird chips.

---

That hand sort of set the tone for the evening. Limping encourages limping, and when there is one Chinese kid who limp/calls 100% of hands, it starts a chain reaction that is impossible to stop it seems.

Chipped it up to about 55k at peak, and then as if by magic the blinds are 2000/4000 and I get it in with  Kd Qd vs  Kh Ks and lose. At this point I was willing to just flip up for a big stack or go and play cash games.

Cash waiting list was 25 people deep for .50/£1, about 10 deep for £1/£2 and £1/£1 PL DC or PLO. Some guys in suits came in for a private sit and go and had to play 13 handed. One made a royal flush and apparently got no freebies because it was a private game. Queue rub downs from the usual crowd of Luton pisstakers that I have grown fond of.

John who was running the cardroom at 1am seemed to be doing his absolute nuts trying to keep everyone happy and dealing with the groups so credit to him as I would have probably tilt flipped a table and ended up in the fetal position by the cash desk. Played some weird DC mix of 2-7 Triple Draw, Pineapple Chinese, 6/7 card Omaha, Lowball and SuperStud with Shane/UGotNuts with a Kalooki deck it took forever to turn into two normal decks. We left the table for literally 30 seconds to get chips and someone came along and shuffled both decks back together. Nobody saw who it was - some say the phantom deck shuffler is still on the loose. Pissed about on Blackjack and lost £80 because I couldn't get on the cash tables, rare for me to do that but in my mind I was going to play something if I couldn't play poker.

I'm at the point now where I need to stop pissing about and being so frivolous with money before Vegas. Two months away but two months goes quickly. I booked the trip in the first week of January, so that's two months that have disappeared already. I've sold 20% of my WSOP events to private investors (private investors meaning my dear old mother on the premise that it's better odds than the lottery tickets she's bought every week since 1995 and not won a bean), but being a nit for two months will make for a much better experience in the summer.

I've had lots of 'Good Luck' messages from friends back in Cornwall before the WSOP. I don't like the phrase 'Good Luck', even though it probably comes out of my mouth a dozen times when I'm at the G. I feel it implies that the time I've spent learning the game and all of it's nuances over the years is void because I am just going in blind hoping luck is on my side. Just taking money 14 hours over the Atlantic to flip coins in 35 degree heat. A little bit of luck is needed, but I am going to have to be 100% on form and ready to tear souls from bodies like Shao Khan from Mortal Kombat.

I've said it before - Luck is for losers. When the first week of June comes I am coming out swinging.

No more poker until then. So see you the G next Friday I guess. 

I had a dream about the Phantom Card shuffler last night, it was rather strange... the deck kept on splitting into two and then shuffling back in together, then some guy I have never seen before appeared on all the face cards...... Shouldn't of eaten that cheese sandwich before bed!

Your Luton G casino blog is brilliantly written.... I think G casino Luton should compensate you for raising the profile personally....

Evening Blonde!

I haven't updated this in around a month, because I may have had the most boring month of my 24 year existence. A real "blink and you'll miss it" type of month where I would have had more enjoyment in an induced coma.

Vegas and the WSOP is about a month away now, and the excitement has sort of subsided. I look at the date and even though 4 weeks will fly by as quick as the last month has, the 6 hour layover in Philadelphia I have now been given courtesy of American Airlines has killed my buzz a bit. I am potentially the most impatient man in the world, 6 hours in an airport terminal waiting to catch a 4 hour long connection with nothing to entertain me apart from seeing how many cigarettes I can smoke at once. I am thinking about stumping up the $50 for the business lounge at PHL airport just so I have the guarantee of some Wifi so I can at least watch a film or pass a couple of hours on Reddit.

I've taken a load of extra shifts over the next couple of weeks, because it's double time for bank holiday weekends and basically nothing happens then. The extra money will come in handy and I'm hoping that it will help the next couple of weeks just blend together in a blur like night shifts tend to do. Most of the time I couldn't tell you what day it is, so here's to cruising through the next 4 weeks with the voices of unhappy business travelers in my ear at night and dreams of big stacks during the day.

---

As far as poker goes - Ending April -£700 or so. Mainly due to the cocktail fueled .50/£1 game at the G one night that I goaded people into making a ton of £2/£4/£8 straddles in. Hey when 5 roulette punters decide to play poker, I say let them punt. I wonder how much of my money ended up down the chute at the end of the evening.

BTW Nirvana - I owe you £10, I couldn't play APAT because of a crippling hangover. I still have the 2x£5 chips at home which I will return next time I see you.

I keep trying to knock the weekday comps on the head, because because every 20k starting stack comp with no antes sort of chips away at my will to live. But being impatient and living 30 mins away from Luton means I always show up too early, find cash isn't going to start for 3 hours and jump in one. It's that or arrive too late and end up on a waiting list for ages. Both scenarios end with me chucking pints down my neck to amuse myself and feeling like dirt the next morning wishing I hadn't bothered.

---

The last comp I played was a £25 bounty on a Wednesday or Thursday night. There was a young kid at my table who clearly hadn't played live before, making the mistakes I'm sure we all did when we first started. String betting, using the wrong denomination chips, trying to shuffle chips and spazzing them everywhere, folding out of turn etc. It was a shame to see a couple of Luton regs on his case needling him at every opportunity. I'm fine with laughing at myself and taking a jab or six at the table, but this lad was nervous as hell when he sat down and the not so good natured banter flicked his way probably means he won't come back. It probably looked like a lion's den to him as opposed to the marshmallow pit it really is, disappointing to witness the 'old guard' rip into a new player.

I am guilty of stepping over the line with my big mouth once or twice, but I am quick to apologise and offer a drink in compensation, but it was just two hours of constant shit flinging. I wish I said something but confrontation is not something I actively seek out, so I just took to constantly 3 betting and check raising the offenders in every spot I could because the longer the usual nitregs spend in the tank, the less they could wind up the new kid.

---

Lots of cash action springing up within a short distance of home now. It's like the single .50/£1 game has mated with the newish £1-£2 game that's been running in the past couple of months to have a load of inbred cash game children that have been adopted by Casino MK and Gentings. The main thing that put me off grinding cash live for 4 nights a week is that I would probably have to just pass money between the same people night in, night out. Now there's loads of £1-£1/£1-£2 and even £2-£5 knocking about without having to take a day trip and a £25 train to London.

Cash games are my favourite thing in the world. I couldn't be a tourney grinder. I like just getting in and getting to work straight away, not pissing about with a seemingly endless starting stack for hours before anything interesting comes up, or busting 15 comps in a row before getting a 3rd and breaking even on the month on the 16th go.

If anyone is playing cash regularly in the Luton/MK area, let me know. Preferably if you're 6'5 and built like Brock Lesnar so you can back me up the next time someone starts trying to verbally maul someone for being new to the game. Or can at least drive me to the hospital to have my nose reset afterwards.

---

Let's get this month out of the way, get to Vegas and get back again with no dramas.

Vamos!



 

Ha , I'd never have known mate.

Can my tenner buy whatever fractional percentage it does of the first  tourney you play in Vegas ?  Could be worth loads imo

Well jel of your current trip plans, hopefully nearer the time you'll get excited again

Cheers

Ha, you can have a chunk of one of the $235 Rio dailys, I think that'll give you the best return.

You can have your potential winnings paid out in £1 chips. From Gentings.

Evening!

Well under a month now before the Vegas trip, and the excitement has returned. I am a self confessed America-phile (I think that's a thing, though I am careful to avoid words with the suffix -phile, as most of the '-phile's aren't good things), so I am looking forward to doing things I think Americans do. Like eating spoonfuls of high fructose corn syrup, waving a revolver about and riding around a Walmart in one of those scooters they reserve for the obese.

I have the following comps penciled in. I'm going to play mainly cash games, but I wanted to play at a good mix of venues with a good mix of game types. Plus I want some sort of trophy to take home, and I think my best shot at one is going to be one of the limit events in a smaller series. Plus the WSOP 2-7 Triple Draw gets about 300 runners on average, so I will take my bracelet shot at a game I am self admittedly pretty good at rather than try and get a seat on the run good bus in a 3000 runner holdem comp for the same price.

Aria $125 x 2 - $250 - Aria
Phamous Poker Series $200k GTD One Day Event - $400 - Planet Hollywood
$2 x Rio Deepstack $235 - $470 - Rio (May drop one of these if I can find a $200-$300 Omaha comp somewhere)
Grand Poker Series Stud Hi/Lo - $240 - Golden Nugget
Binions Poker Series H.O.R.S.E - $240 - Binions
WSOP $1500  2-7 Triple Draw - $1500 - Rio

Total - $3100-ish.

---

Work is starting to get on my nerves a bit now, mainly because our clients in Asia have decided to call instead of email now. Having commands barked at you in broken English gets old quickly. They don't mean to come across as rude, but it's like dealing with a child. I don't mind calls from the English folk as they want to get things over with as quickly as possible, but the guys in Singapore love to drag a 30 second call into 8 minutes worth of repeated sentences.

I don't really want to do it anymore, but summer is coming up and it's two months of quiet nights. So I'm going to sit back, collect my wages for doing almost no work and re-evaluate in September. I'm not doing another mental Christmas there, I just need to try and figure out the optimal time to leave. I think I'm one of the only employees not on a zero hour contract, and my notice period is a month as I would have to train my replacement.

When I am taking bookings for people younger than me who are going on business trips overseas with big clients, it's probably time to re-think the whole career thing. I've never believed in the whole deal where you find a job, work 45 hours a week until you're 65 and then retire. It doesn't make sense to me, that you'd sign most of your life away to swivel on an office chair for just enough money to get by on. But then I've never had a job I really liked.

Could take the money I have (or have left) after Vegas and move to Thailand to grind cash games online. Though my judgement is poor even when I am sober, and I can't tell a lady from a ladyboy. All cats are black in the dark though, right?

---

Lost chunks with KK vs AK this past week. Never mind.

When luck shuts the door, we go in through the window.


 

So I've managed to put my back out quite badly. Walking to the chippy. I was so excited to get some chips in me, that I moved too fast and done myself an injury. It feels like I've had one of the G Casino massages.

I think it's the most embarrassing way I've ever injured myself, and that's coming from someone who has fallen in every open drain they have come across. I seemed to be quite resilient when it came to getting injured in the past few years, which was nice as I think I spent more time in hospitals and the doctors than I did in school from 12-16. House is basically empty this week as my dear old mother and her other half are spending two weeks in Sorrento in Italy, and my sister is on a regular person's sleeping pattern so I can't send her out for strong pain killers and deep heat when I'm about at 3am. You know you read about people who've died but nobody has noticed, and they get found 3 weeks later stuck to their armchair with the TV still going? I always wondered how that can happen, but I sort of get it now.

Kind of leaves me without much to do until I can actually sit up without grimacing. I finally got around to buying Football Manager 15, and I have spent the better part of 3 days getting Watford into the Champions League by the skin of my teeth. Been meaning to watch the new series of Game Of Thrones too, but since they've deviated so far from the books now I don't think I can really be bothered anymore.

In between batches of Football Manager and the eternal struggle to obtain work permits for 17 year old Albanian midfielders, I've been trying to watch some films. I'm not really much of a film person anymore, but I am practicing for the long trip to Las Vegas in a couple of weeks. I watched California Split, which is now one of my favourite gambling films. I've been wanting to watch it for a while but it only had one run on DVD and is now out of print, so a copy is between £50-80 on Amazon. Managed to snag a download of it online though. I'm all for paying for music/films etc, but I couldn't justify £50 on 90 minutes worth of film. Though that might be the going rate in some shops in Soho, maybe one of the more 'cultured' readers could let us know.

---

The creepiest thing happened to me last night. I got a phone call at about 1am - which is not unusual really on a Friday night, but the number that called belonged to me about 2 years ago. I recognized it instantly. It rang for about 3 seconds and cut off. That number was my old one when I was contracted to EE, which I have (thankfully) been free of for a good while. It's probably been reassigned to someone else by now, but I am stumped as to how it could call my new number on my contract with O2.

The old sim card from that contract is still in my old iPhone, which has been turned off for the better part of 18 months and is rotting in a shoe box in the cabinet in the room downstairs. I wanted to go down and investigate, but I've seen enough horror films in the past to know that's how you get a machete in the neck. I am still unable to figure out how this could happen. Any ideas?

---

I am going to try and avoid anymore takeaway related injuries. I don't much believe in 'signs' or a higher being, but if something out there is telling me to lay off the takeaways and have a salad once in a while - I hear you.



 

Great writing. I bet you could make tikay's shopping list sound interesting.

Yep, sometimes forget to acknowledge, but I love reading these and often given me a genuine lol moment

Hi,

What date(s) are you playing that Golden Nugget Hi-Lo?

Be good to bump into each other, I'll be playing most of those, except the Limit affairs.

If you've not met me, I'm late forties, usually dressed in a rather suave manner.

The Stud 8/b is at 11am on the 12th June I believe. If you're about at that time, make a beeline for the youngest looking person in the comp - it'll probably be me. By all accounts it should be free of the hoodie wearing button clickers and you'll probably be able to hear me if you can't see me.

Venetian PLO8 on same day I think

I think that's the evening event on the Venetian Deepstack schedule that day for $600. Can't say I am going to be involved, but it's fairly likely I will be playing cash in the vicinity that evening if all goes pair shaped at the Golden Nugget that day.

Remember I'll have 5% of your package when you've got your final package sorted

Ahh, might bump into you at Nugget then, I'll be in hoodie and headphones just to confuse you :)

Yeah I will be playing the stud8 on the 12th too.  complete with hoodie and baseball cap :)   Going to be a danger this year.  finally got glasses so will be able to see the cards!!.

You going to be at the Venetian that day then Simon or slumming it at the Nugget?

Evening Blonde!

My back is pretty much back to normal. Had a few days dosed up on Paramol which was chucked through my letterbox by one of the many people I had been moaning to this week. Thank you magic painkiller fairy. Happy to be able to sit up again, I was fearing that if I couldn't then this blog would be less about my adventures on the felt and more like a Jeffrey Archer prison diary.

I'm now thinking it was a kidney thing playing up and masquerading as lower back pain, seeing as I have a severe energy drink addiction and I imagine if you chopped me open a bunch of caffeine syrup and rocks of sugar would fall out of my organs. Hadn't got the chance to get my three pints of Cherry flavored Relentless in me each morning, so I think laying off those and just drinking water all week might have sorted it out.

Up and about now, but with nowhere to go. I could do jumping jacks if I wanted, but I just want to sit down and watch Gypsy Weddings. The irony of the past few days isn't lost on me.

---

I am currently embroiled in a war at work with someone in Singapore. They do the same job as me, just on the other side of the world for a similar company. The person in Singapore cocked up and ended up and overcharging a client by about £500 on their personal card as they double booked a load of stuff and didn't cancel them, and they've decided to try and frame me for it. Even though all requests are automatically logged at the second they are made and connected to individual corporate accounts, they are adamant that I messed it up and they refuse to deal with it further. Thing is I wasn't even working when it happened!

It's some admin in Asia fearing for their job, and have decided to try and chuck me under the bus for no reason other than to save themselves. Shame the company I work for can be so bollockless at times that they will just give in and eat a £500 refund to this client for another companies mistake rather than risk losing an account. We had a guy yesterday "demand compensation" for a car from Austria to Slovakia because we couldn't sort him one on 30 minutes notice and he had to rent a car himself. Wouldn't surprise me if they just snap shipped him the £150, because heaven forbid this moron sends a strongly worded email to his manager about us.

Odds on tonights tactics/excuses from the guys in Singapore as to why they shouldn't cough up -

"The system glitched and made the error" - 1/3
Pretending not to understand English and writing gibberish emails on purpose to buy time, despite having phone conversations with me 15 minutes earlier - 4/1
Forwarding me fake emails from my colleagues again that admit to the fault being on our end, but are clearly not in the font/formatting/stupid corporate buzzwords we use in our emails - 2/1
"This is our fault, sorry for the trouble" - 1000/1

My god it's a grind sometimes. I think I'm developing tinnitus as well from the high pitched ringtone our phone software uses. Injured at work and not your fault? Maybe the National Accident Helpline will help bring me back to even for the year. More than willing to lose a finger or something if need be.

---

Does anyone have any experience of going to the Red Rock Canyon? I fancy heading up there for an afternoon, but I don't want to be one of those tourists that have to get rescued halfway up a mountain, all dehydrated with a snake bite on my leg.

Not adverse to hiring a mountain bike and doing a couple of trails if that's something they do. I figure if I don't go, I'll wish I had. If I am just constantly grinding it out, I'll feel like one of those old slot machine ladies. All insert coin, press button, repeat.

Also need to do my travel insurance. Do not need a repeat of last years fiasco in Crete where I drank myself into a private hospital.

---

My friends at Uni in London had a poker night last week. I didn't get an invite, but I did get sent pictures and asked "who wins this one" multiple times.

I imagine they didn't invite me because they didn't want to lose to someone who actually knows what hand beats what, and not because I would be constantly enforcing rules and taking it upon myself to be a TD when everyone just wants to flick in a fiver and get pissed.

Every time I have played a home game, it has evolved into some daft game of DC where we make up the rules on the spot. I've developed a knack for it.

- Superstud High only, second best hand wins and you can swap your card on 5th street for £2.
- "First to quads" - 4 card draw, cost is £1 a round to draw. First person to make quads wins. Shuffle discards back in as many times as necessary. Hilarious when two people are drawing to the same quads.
- Double deck holdem. 5 of a kind is the best hand.
- 5 Card triple draw high with Jokers Wild

And my favourite...

Get too drunk and end up calling someone up wild west style for heads up for rolls. Realise that you only have £50 on you, keep increasing the blinds before you start until they back out.

---

A long night of arguments and corporate newspeak ahead. I'd rather play limit holdem.

That home game seems tasty! Make sure I'm in the guest list next time!

Glad to hear your back on you feet! You should defiantly write a book or a script for a film. Doesn't matter what the plot is I'm sure the detail you describe would make it interesting!

Have you been writing Diray's/blogs for a while? On any other forums?

Nugget first V. very much as a back up if the wheels fall off :)

Good Morning - it's 12:03am at the time of writing. And I leave for Las Vegas tomorrow.

It feels like I've already missed out on about three quarters of the events after reading through everyone's diaries. Very much looking forward to arriving and just getting the journey out of the way.

- 5:30am tomorrow - Leave Bedford for the drive to Manchester Airport. It's about a three hour journey without stops. I could have flown from one of the London Airports for an extra £100, daft not to in hindsight.
- 9:00am - Arrive and shamble to the terminal, get into departures with the minimum of fuss and avoid buying any cigs/food/drink at silly markup. Hit Travelex and try and change up some hundreds.
- 11:00am - US735 to Philadelphia. 7 hour flight on average. Fidget like a mad man, watch the new Mad Max on my tablet and try and get my head down for a bit.
- 6:00pm GMT - Arrive, get frisked by customs/immigration - avoid rubber gloves and sail on through in a reasonable amount of time. Look for Wendy's and stuff my face with burgers.
- 10:00pm GMT - US676 to Las Vegas. Hope I've got enough battery on my tablet to watch the episodes of Game of Thrones I have missed.
- 2:00am GMT on the 12th - Arrive, meet my fancy executive car and chauffeur (work perks) to take me to the famously non fancy Circus Circus.

Could I have made this outbound trip any worse for myself? Added about five hours onto my journey for the sake of saving about £100. I'm sure it'll fly by though given I live in a perpetual haze between night and day where time means nothing like a Salvador Dali painting. All clocks will be melting into the walls by the time I catch my connection - though I am hoping on my arrival into Las Vegas it'll turn a bit more Bob Ross. Only with less "Happy Little Trees" and more "Angry Neon Lights".

I hope I can just get into bed and fall asleep. I can already picture myself dumping my bags in, having a shower and auto piloting into a taxi and just mumbling "Rio".

I've done similar before - got into bed after a long day, and as if by magic I'm reg'd for a comp at the Luton G with almost no recollection of actually getting there. It's almost as if the 18:25 train from Bedford leaves from Platform 9 and 3/4.

I'm feeling good about it though - let's see how good I feel on the next update. Which could be anything from me rubbing 10k bricks on my bare chest to dressing up as Buzz Lightyear and standing on Freemont Street trying to charge $5 for a photo because I did myself in playing Pineapple Chinese.

---

I have my life in a carry on suitcase, and I'm going to Las Vegas. It's the stuff dreams are made of.

Long time lurker , love your diary.  Have a fantastic trip. Be lucky.

Great stuff, good luck

Enjoy. Looking forward to updates.

I barely made it back to England. I hate planes, I hate flying and I hate waiting. I also now hate old German ladies, but we will come to that soon enough.

---

DAY ONE -

It's not such a bad drive from Bedford to Manchester at 5am. With each meter north of Birmingham, I was going further north in England than I had ever been in my life. I treated that as an adventure in itself, as preparation for a transatlantic mission to the bright lights of Las Vegas.

It took about 3 hours. When I got to arrivals, I had about three and a half hours to wait until boarding. I took this time to smoke as many cigarettes as my weak lungs could possibly handle, as there would be no more puffs until touchdown in Vegas. I set a new record. 14 in 80 minutes. Two more than I managed to do two in the same time in Bristol airport last year.

I spent about 30 minutes checking out the planes outside. Watching takeoffs and landings. I'm always amazed at how big they really are up close, and I spent a while thinking about what would happen to the guy working on one of the planes if he got sucked up into one of the engines. Would he go straight through the other end, or get all mangled up in the middle? A nice cheerful thought to have before boarding a big metal tube filled with highly explosive fuel that would be shooting me across the Atlantic Ocean at 500 miles an hour, with nowhere to go but 40,000 feet down into a watery abyss.

I also played 'Fat or American'. It's a fun game, where you have to guess if the person is fat, or just American. Exactly what it says on the tin. America won. 4-2.

We managed to get away on time, and I had the row all to myself. I got to lay down on the plane pretty much all the way there, and American Airlines are always kind enough to provide a pillow and blanket for everyone. I felt I was the envy of everyone else there who had to sit bolt upright for the next 7 hours.

We got into Philadelphia around 15 minutes early, and the first place I went to was a toilet with a good quarter inch of urine on the floor. That will now always be my first impression of America. That and the propaganda I was subjected to when waiting to clear customs. TV screen after TV screen showing what seemed to be highlights of America because of the army and their freedoms and eagles and burgers and Budweiser and the NFL and AMERICA. I literally felt that a big Star Spangled Banner was about to unfurl from the roof while fireworks went off and people sang God Bless the USA. It was almost a parody of itself.

The customs line cleared fairly quickly, but the guy who stamped my passport was the most miserable and awkward bugger ever. Had to just grin and bear it though, as this guy could literally just tell me to piss off and send me back home.

Philadelphia airport is a pretty grim place in need of some paint and some cheerful staff, but that all changes once you make it to the Market Street near gates B/C/D. It's all nicely polished in a clear attempt to get you to spend money in their overpriced shops. I went to Wendy's, and ordered a Baconator meal, because it sounded the most American and gluttonous. Essentially a bacon cheeseburger, but the name is what got me. Like the Terminator but made of meat and grease, as if it has the potential to kill you. $12 for a regular meal, but the drink it came with was enough to make me sick. A good litre of artificially sweetened Coca-Cola. I initially thought it was a joke the staff played on Non-Americans, but after inquiring if that really was a regular sized drink in America and getting a look from the cashier as if I was the stupid one for asking, I settled in to try and work through this $12 beef suicide.

A guy had eaten so much at Wendy's that he had fallen asleep in his motorised wheelchair in full recline mode. This seemed to be a common occurrence, as nobody batted an eyelid and just worked around him. Again, a parody of itself. And I had only been in America for about 45 minutes.

Killed an hour on my tablet before the 5 hour flight to Las Vegas. Watched Clerks 2 for the first 90 minutes, and slept for the rest. Had some hilarious flight attendants, they seemed to have a whole stand up comedy routine based around signing up for the American Airlines credit card and using it in Las Vegas. "Accepted by all casino cashiers, strip clubs and 'FEMALE COMPANIONS'" apparently.

Las Vegas Airport was empty when I arrived, which was quite spooky. It was only 7pm too, but there was barely anyone there. Caught the little tram from arrivals to the main hall, and it was equally quiet. I headed outside to have a much wanted cigarette and find a cab, and I was hit by two things. The heat, and the hundreds of people trying to do the same thing as me. You never get used to coming out of an air conditioned building, and being blasted in the face by the desert sun - even in the evenings where the sun is nowhere to be seen.

Found a cab, and headed to the luxury of Circus Circus. It was a 15 minute taxi, but that 15 minutes flashed by in a sea of neon lights and worries about this hotel I have booked for myself. It's no secret that the place is lacking in polish and is basically a 1970's timewarp, but I didn't find it all that bad. Until I was told my room was in the trailer park across the street called 'The Manor'. I started the whole check in process, but slipped the guy a $20 and he gave me a suite instead in the main casino building. It wasn't really a 'suite' at all, but compared to the original room it might as well have been The Ritz. Shower, shirt change, and we headed down to check out the casino.

I don't really do much gambling, but I'd heard about the "free" drinks you get if you plonk yourself down at a table and start degen'ing away. So I sat an empty Three Card Poker table for $150 and started playing $10 ante/$5 pair plus bets for a bit. I racked up quite the selection of cocktails in that hour and left about $200 up.

Sucked down a few Vodka and pineapples, and was ready to head to bed. On the walk back to the elevator, the song from the WSOP started playing on the tannoy. You know the one that goes "THIS IS GONNA BE THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFEEEE...". They'd been playing music all night, but this is the only song I noticed. At that point it finally clicked that I was about 5 minutes away from the Rio. 5 minutes away from the place I'd always wanted to play and the place that holds the key to my dreams.

I was wearing the only collared shirt I own, had the type of drinking buzz on that makes you think you can take on the world, and a pocket full of hundred dollar bills. So I turned right around, said "Fuck it", got into a cab, and said "Take me to...ARIA."

I don't know why the words ARIA came out of my mouth. I meant to say Rio, but I couldn't get myself to say it. I like to think that subconsciously I didn't want to go to the Rio in the state I was in. Jetlagged to hell and two drinks away from being a slurring moron. Maybe in a few years someone will ask about my first WSOP experience and I didn't want to say "I can't really remember it, because of all the cocktails I had in a budget hotel with it's own trapeze artists". To me the Rio was pure, and I didn't want to taint it. Like going to the Vatican and pissing up the walls.

As someone who is used to the Luton G casino, Aria was amazing to me. I made a beeline past the rows and rows of table games and slots and hot girls that are probably prostitutes to the poker room. Spoke to the guy on the podium who was super helpful and asked to be put on the list for 9/18 mix. He said there was a seat open and to just go straight ahead and through the door. He sent me to the mixed game, just the wrong mixed game. He'd sent me to the Ivey Room.

As soon as I realised where I was, I did an about turn so fast I almost did a full 360 that would make Michael Jackson rise from the dead and applaud. I told the guy what happened, and he apologised and laughed. Settled on a 1/3 game after that short burst of excitement. In for $300, and the first thing I noticed was people were actually making 3x raises and they were getting some sort of respect. I decided that I was there to rumble and took to throwing out a fair share of 3bets and "Triple Barrel Darrel" came out to play for a bit. Build up a $700 stack within an hour, chinned off some more Vodka and Pinapples and got super bored after a while. Racked it up and booked a $400 win.

There was probably some talk about the kid who showed up at Ivey Room, bricked it and left within 15 seconds that night. Honest mistake, but blame the podium guy. Spent a bit time exploring Aria, and thinking about how this entire place is built off people's losses. Cab back to the hotel, taxi driver thought I was Australian, when I was just pissed. Maybe that's the reason he thought I was an Aussie.

The good thing about Circus Circus is they had a 24hour shop downstairs from my room, so I went to stock up on Gatorade so I wouldn't want to blow my own head off in the morning. I ran into a farmer from Arlington, Texas called Del who convinced me to do some shots of Fireball with him. That stuff is vile, you could clean drains with it and a week later I think I still have a hole in my small intestine because of it.

I woke up in the same clothes I went to sleep in, and I had acquired two more $100 chips that I didn't realise I had.

It was a good start, but it gets worse. And then it gets much, much better.

Great post, intrigue much!

.YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5FsrNEeqd6Q

first time i have sat down and had a good nose at this blog. the way you write is really enjoyable  to read.

looking forward to the next installment of your vegas shennanigans.

Ha - been looking forward to this Vegas report.

I woke up feeling fine. Which probably goes to show how much Vodka was really in my Vodka and pineapple juice.

---

DAY TWO -

When you wake up after a night of drinking in a casino, the first feeling you have isn't usually a mouth as dry as Las Vegas itself and a need to call people and apoligise for anything you may have said the night previously. It's more of a sinking feeling that starts from your heart and burns right down into the pit of your stomach. You want to check your wallet and your bank balance, but you don't dare because ignorance is bliss.

I had a feeling I did well for someone playing pit games all night, and I resigned myself to being satisfied if I didn't use an ATM at all. If you haven't won, then create a situation that you did win in and be happy with it. If I hadn't used the cashpoint, then I'd won.

I flicked on the TV, to find that I had access to 3 TV channels. ESPN Boxing on repeat, A Mexican TV station called Telemundo and the Las Vegas channel which showed adverts for various goings on in Sin City. They show an awful lot of adverts for medicine.

"Ask your Doctor if Degen-amol is right for you. Side effects might include - playing craps with no idea of the rules, hammering slot machines and playing 6 Card Double Flop Omaha.

I felt a bit bad that I'd wasted my one nice collared shirt within 2 hours of arriving into Vegas, but I am a sucker for a special occasion. I needed to shower though, because hangover sweat is potent. You could tell what I had been drinking if you smelt me a mile away. A sickly sweet smell, like one of those Glade plug in air fresheners. A smell that might be passable for a girl's perfume if it was watered down by a factor of ten. My shower was prison-esque. It seemed to pump out hot water in bursts, as if it wanted me to move along as soon as possible so the next inmate of the Circus Circus asylum could have a go. Now looking and smelling reasonably respectable, I had enough confidence to check the wallet.

In the shower small parts of the previous evening came back to me. I couldn't really remember losing too much. I could remember telling someone that I thought basketball was shit, I could remember Del the Texan farmer pulling QQQ with $25 on the pair plus in Three Card Poker for a decent clip, and I could remember being told to stop bending the cards. But I can't remember losing chunks. We had $500 more than we came with in our wallet, plus two $100 chips. Two lovely ceramic black disks adorned with picture of a winking clown, as if it was saying "Good work son". Like a Christmas card from an old relative you don't speak to much but they've kindly stuck a tattered old fiver in it, it was that sort of surprise. Deep down I knew these would end up being in the rack of some other casino sooner or later. Exchanged to cash, back into chips, and then into the ether. But $700 up in a matter of hours is a win. And I was in need of wins. And one day of wins has saved me from a full week off losses right off the bat. Creating situations for yourself that you have won. It'll stop you going mad.

I told myself today would be free from degeneracy unless it involved two, four or seven cards. Technically this allowed me a loophole to play blackjack, but with 6/5 Blackjacks and $25 minimums, I wasn't all that interested. It was just a matter of where to go. And there was only one place to go. The Rio.

To more experienced Vegas goers, it may seem like I gave the place an idealistic view. Like I was expecting Phil Hellmuth himself to hold the door open for me and welcome me inside.  But man, after playing poker for the better part of 8 years, and finally making it to the World Series of Poker. It's quite a feeling.

I stopped by the 3bet clothing booth and bought a Run It Up hoodie, and the guy told me Jason Somerville was getting ready for the PokerNews podcast around the corner and that I should go say hi. But I have a habit of saying daft things when I first meet people, so I gave it a miss. I didn't want one of my poker idols thinking I was a clown, and I was sure our paths would cross sometime later at the Rio anyway.

I sat in for some $1/$3 and was pretty happy with how fast I got seated. Six handed table as well which I thought was a plus. My only real issue was the 70 year old man on the table who bought in for $100, and spent all his time telling the dealer how to do their job. It felt like he was paying $4 an orbit just to complain about the WSOP dealers this year. It was a limpy sort of table, so I decided to straddle every time he was in the BB just to piss him off and deny him his free flop. Every time someone would move away from the table, he would call the floor and demand reduced rake. Tilted me so much that I left after about 45 minutes, -$75. Most of it from Straddles, which I felt was a fair price to pay to frustrate this old guy.

Registered the 6pm $185 Deepstack. After playing in Luton, 10,000 starting chips seems kind of thin for a 'deepstack'. 30 minute levels and with a reasonable structure for the first 4 hours, it seemed like good value. I also got to deliver the biggest bad beat I have ever given.

Blinds are 150/300/25

I am in the SB with 55.
Folds around to the CO (hoodie wearing button clicker) who opens for 700.
I 3b to 1900.
He 4b to 4000.
I shove 12k total.
He calls with 99.

He flops top set. I go running quads.

(http://s12.postimg.org/jdzph2wm5/Running_Quads.png)

There was about $9,000 up top, but we bust two tables from the bubble, AK > AQ. GG.

Registered a $175 single table STT, but busted super quickly. T9 > AT on T93.

I went straight back to Circus Circus. I felt all poker'd out for the day, which was unusual because I can usually play until I physically can't stay awake any longer. But we decided that starting in the morning we were going on a full day cash game grind across all of Las Vegas.

I ordered a pizza to my hotel room from the pizza shop in the hotel, and fell asleep without even touching it. Drifted off with the dulcet tones of Mexican soap operas on my TV, and satisfied that I'd been to the WSOP. I'm sure it won't be the last time.

me too, wondered though was the strange flights worth the effort?  I tried indirect years ago and felt sh t first few days

In the future I would definitely stump up the extra couple of hundred quid and fly direct, but it was sort of nice to break the journey up into a couple of legs. If only to get up and have a walk around for a bit.

I would be spending the same amount for the flight direct from one of the London airports rather than paying £200 less to fly from Manchester but having to hire a car to get up there and spending £80 on a train ticket back home. I was trying to save some money when booking without really considering the extra costs involved for flying from an airport 200 miles away.

Love this.

Enjoy your trip Sir.

Circus Circus smells like a hospital. There's always a tangy scent of disinfectant lingering in the air. I initially thought it was from kids coming off the rollercoaster and being a bit sick. But given the average age of the punters in the casino area, I can only assume it was from cleaning up dead pensioners from under slot machines.

I always thought slot machines were stupid. 24 hours later, my mind would be changed.

---

DAY THREE -

Las Vegas is home to some of the world's fanciest restaurants, yet I was in bed at 8am eating day old cold pizza and trying to make half a bottle of Gatorade last until I had enough energy to venture out. Everything seems to have about 15 different flavours in America. Walls and walls of the same shit with slight modifications. I decided to try and sample all of the different flavours of Gatorade, turning hangover prevention into a fun little game for myself.

Today I was determined to grind cash games in as many casinos as I could. Problem was I didn't really know the exact location of most of the cardrooms, and I wanted to avoid taking cabs to and from them several times. I didn't have a set schedule, and I didn't even know where I was going until I got to the taxi line as was asked where I wanted to go. I just spluttered out "..Venetian?" when asked, with a strange inflection that made it sound like I didn't know if it was a real place or not. Like I just asked the guy to get me a taxi to Mordor.

My cab driver was a Japanese guy, who asked if I was English. I confirmed I was, and he spent the 5 minute drive doing terrible impressions of English accents.

"GEORDIE? GEORDIE? WAY AY MAN?"
"YOU FROM LANDAN BRUV?"
"SCOUSE? SCOUSE? EH? EH?"

I sort of admired his dedication to his job, because if I had to drive groups of pissed Englishmen about in Vegas, I'd have jacked it in within the first shift. I didn't admire his persistence though, because he only really had three accents in his little routine, and he burned through them really quickly - so he just started over again. Once more with feeling.

He opened the door for me, and pointed to the way in. Grabbed my hand to shake it and said - "HEY! NO FACKIN WORRIES MATE!" in this terrible Danny Dyer accent, which caught me off guard enough to make me burst into laughter. He earned his extra couple of dollars tip there. He saved the best till last. It was his Bohemian Rhapsody. You think it's all over and you're a bit underwhelmed, and then he comes back out with his greatest hit.

I only really settled on the Venetian because I was 100% certain they had a poker room, and I was about 60% certain it was in a fairly central strip location so I could walk to the other casinos without much trouble. I could ease into the day with some friendly $1/$2, before we tackle the more interesting games during the evening. Build up a decent cushion of wins to soften the blow of any potential losses later on in the day.

The Venetian is quite a casino. It's almost sickeningly grand, like a degenerate Buckingham Palace. It's like your Grandma's living room, if she had roulette tables in it.

(http://i57.tinypic.com/v6rihe.png)

Our $1/$2 table was fairly standard for 10am. Surly old men for the most part. Though they were content to double me up within 5 hands when I had two lovely red Aces. In England I'm lucky to squeak a fiver out of the earlybirds at The Vic, so it was a welcome change. There was a call for a Limit Omaha Hi/Lo starting, and I jumped at the chance to play seeing as Limit poker is virtually non-existent back home outside of the odd £150/£300 game in London.

Limit Omaha/8 has a reputation as an old person's game. I reserved judgement until I got to the table and saw the line up. That reputation is not built on lies, it seems. I can make the easy jokes about someone being in an Iron Lung and there being a strong smell of Werther's Originals, but this was the most enjoyable game of my whole trip. It was almost as if the early morning Limit O/8 at the Venetian was their little social club, but they were very accommodating of a young hoodie wearing European and they were genuinely interested in speaking to me and finding out about England and myself personally. They also love to gamble. 6 way capped pots were the norm. These games are played with $1 chips only, which makes for fun tower building. Get a good scoop in, and you win about 2 racks worth of chips.

We left the game about two hours in, but I would have stayed longer if I could because these guys were brilliant.

(http://i57.tinypic.com/2vkersz.png)

We ended our rumble at the Venetian about $500 up in around 3 hours. Had chicken and chips from the Venetian food court and ticked off a Gatorade flavour from the list. No real idea where to play next, so I decided to wander into whatever casino was next and play if they had a poker room. That's how I ended up in Harrah's.

I didn't know Harrah's even had a poker room, I only stopped in to get out of the heat, sink this enormous can of beer I got for $2 in CVS and smoke while pretending to play a video poker machine.

(http://i59.tinypic.com/wurotu.png)

Harrah's poker room is about 6 tables in a narrow corner near the entrance, though they were all full. Half tournament, half $1/$2 cash. All the atmosphere of a funeral. Which was apt because it seemed like half the players wanted to kill themselves. I get given a 7 seat, meaning I can't see the tiny cards because the dealer loves to spread a flop all the way down the other end of the table. I had to just guess if one of the paint cards gave me a pair and bet accordingly. Surprisingly we managed to book a small $30 win effectively playing blind.

Harrah's did have one perk though. The girl selling cigarettes. You can hear her singing her little jingle from across the casino in her high pitched California Valley Girl accent. Like a red haired siren calling me to my emphysema related grave.

"CIGARETTEEEEEEES, CIGARRRRRRRRRRRS, ROSES!"

I would have spent all my money on the little white chapel there and then if she said she'd marry me. I am a bollockless little prat though so instead of making a pass at her I just bought loads of Menthol Marlboro's instead. I went back and bought 4 or 5 packs off her over the course of the day. I'm still working my way through them now actually. I'm sure it'll all be a funny story when we get married next year.

The thing about Las Vegas for those who haven't been, is that all casinos seem to merge with each other. You walk out the back of one, and straight into another. So by virtue of simply wandering in as close of straight line as I could, I ended up in the Flamingo. It's sort of modern with a 1970's twist. Lots of pink and chrome, lots of older people that I imagine have been coming here for a long time. They also had a poker room, which meant I had to have a go. $1/$2 or $2/$4 limit. The $2/$4 limit was the most popular. You could sit in with $60 and waste all night knocking back the complementary cocktails. This Flamingo $1/$2 would be the best action I found all trip.

At first glance it didn't look like much. Everyone was still on their $200 buy in, so I assumed it was a new game. As soon as I got in though, it seemed to take on a life of it's own. $15 raises pre with 4 callers was normal. They were folding to a lot of 3bets though. I decided on just ripping it with 99+ and AQs+ any time this happened, and picked up a good few $50+ pots pre without any hassle.

We're about $450 deep and we straddle for $4. We're dealt Jh Jd.

Raise to $20. 3 callers. We decide to just call as at this point I am cruising nicely and I feel more than comfortable navigating post flop with this crowd.

Nice  Js in the door alongside a  7c and a  6h.

We check call $50.

7s on the turn, and we check raise this gentleman all in as he bets $100. He had about $70 left to call off, but he took a good 3 minutes to think about it. We show as soon as he calls, and he mucks before the river comes in. Nice to spin up 3 buy ins in the course of an hour.

I bleed down to about $700 after getting involved in some tiny pots, and then we cooler the shit out of someone.

I open  Qs Ks in the Hijack for $15, with both the SB and BB calling.
Flop is 66Q.
Continue for $35
BB calls.
Turn is a Q. Absolute gin.
We bet $70.
The chap I am in the pot with sighs and says "Well, might as well go all in". He sighs, and moves all in. Like he doesn't have it. Like he's pulling the world's worst bluff. If he had 66 I would have kicked myself for not seeing it.
I snap it off. Pot is well over $1k now.
He flips over  Qh Th.
River  Kc.

He was gone before I even had a chance to see the blood drain from his face.

(http://i59.tinypic.com/1sjv4i.png)

Ended the session at the Flamingo about $1250 up in the end. Which pushed us to about $1800 profit by 7pm.

I discovered a fun new game during my walks down the strip. It was called "Collect all the prostitute cards". Like seedy Pokemon cards, I wanted to catch them all. From Anya to Zara, I was determined to get as many as possible. I wanted to turn them into some sort of collage and frame them as a fun reminder of Las Vegas, but in the end I settled on collecting chips. Nobody is going to think less of me for collecting casino chips.

Had a little walk around Planet Hollywood, and sniffed out Bellagio as the next grind stop. It's basically across the road, but distance is so deceiving in Las Vegas. I was knackered by the time I got there, and the poker room was rammed. Lists as far as the eye can see for $1/$3 to $5/$10. I put myself on all of them and waited. Pulled up at the bar, and ordered a pint of Newcastle Brown. $13. If I wasn't up for the day I'd have sent it back. It's hardly one of your fancy artisan craft ales.

Nicely saddled up at the bar, I got talking to a young lady. Who seemed overly interested in a sweaty kid drinking what looked like a pint of warm drain water. She turned out to be a not so subtle lady of the night/early evening. She got away with one of my cigarettes and nothing else. I checked my collection of prostitute trading cards back at the hotel to see if she was on one of them. Still searching for the elusive Sadie card to complete the set.

We had $100 on the Blackjack and turned it into $300 in two hands. Broke the $2000 profit barrier and called it a night. Or tried to, as the Bellagio taxi line was longer than the line for the cash games.

It's a good feeling going to bed after a strong winning day. It's like it erases all the times you've gone to bed after being crushed.

Tomorrow it was time to forget all of our troubles and go downtown. Pizza is still good when it's close to two days old.

Awesome wordsmitherness, post more please.

Great write ups Ransom - really enjoying this.

Nice write ups.  If you are getting to the Bellagio cab line at a weekend, or at the same time that a show kicks out for example, lines are insane.  Some short cuts for this.  The first is just go to the front of the line, ask the guy if you can get a town car.  He will (assuming he has one available) sort that for you and get you straight in it.  ~ $50 for that, rather than ~$20 for a cab, so on a winning day, $30 to avoid a line (and you get a decent Lincoln Town Car rather than a battered Crown Victoria) The second route I haven't ever tried, but I have heard from people that have.   Basically just tipping one of the guys $10 with whatever cheesey line you want to come out with.  I'd prefer the first option.  The third option if it is really insane is to just walk over the bridge to Ballys and get a cab from there.

Very good Ransom.

Sounds like you had a great time, great fun reading these :-)

Do love your reports, colourful and detailed; definitely a great addition to blonde 👌

Thank you all for the nice comments, I enjoy writing these as much as people seem to enjoy reading them! I've been meaning to get another one up sooner, but I've spent the past week getting hammered at online cash.

---

"Did you know Jacks are the only hand on the flop that can't make the nuts?" - "What about if you just flop quads?" - "Yeah but someone might go running Royal Flush so it can't be the nuts". - Overhead at an Aria $1/$3 cash game, 18th June 2015. No money in hold'em, everyone's solid.

---

DAY FOUR

I get up as I have done the past three mornings. Bleary eyed, and with a face so dry from the arctic air con in my room that one fedora would have me looking a dead ringer for Freddy Kreuger. Shower, slice of now 54 hour old cold pizza, downstairs for Gatorade (Fruit Punch today, vile) and to post up at the first video poker machine with an ashtray to plan the day ahead. Cocktail waitress comes along, rude not to. 10am in Vegas is 3am in England so it was fine in my book.

We were heading downtown for Binion's $240 H.O.R.S.E event, that much was certain. Limit mixed games are my thing, and have been for the past 2 years. I've been a steady winner at them online for quite a while, so confidence was pretty high. Walk in, 3bets/4bets/cap all day, get a trophy. The plan was set, ready to rumble.

"I was born on fifth street, everyone else is just visiting"

I'd become well acquainted with the guy who calls cabs forward at Circus Circus, he'd ask me what I was playing today and wished me good luck each time which was nice. Funny thing is he never seemed to have any time off. He'd be out front with his whistle from 10am until I got back at 2am, and he'd be doing cabs again in the morning. I'd always tip him, because I still wasn't sure who to tip in Vegas. Everyone got one dollar bills just to be on the safe side.

We get Downtown far too early, because I thought it was a midday comp, when it actually started at 2pm. My first thoughts of Downtown is that the Freemont Street Experience is actually pretty tiny. Barring the wait at the crossing halfway down, you can get from one side to the other in about 3 minutes of walking. It also looks pretty depressing during the day with nobody about apart from old Vietnam war veterans begging on the street. Far cry from the glitter of the strip.

I wasn't in a particularly gamble-y mood, so my options to kill time felt fairly limited. I also couldn't drink in the street like a pissy old tramp because of some pathetic rules on Freemont so I felt totally lost as to what to do for the next two hours. They wouldn't let me reg the comp for another 60 minutes, so I went to The D because it was the only casino that didn't have wooden everything and a sense that Kenny Rodgers was going to post up next to me wearing a cowboy hat and tell me that I should know when to hold them, and when to fold them.

The D is my type of casino. Loud, brash and with 1980's rock music pumping out at max volume. They had a promotion outside where you could win the car from Knight Rider or something. It was pretty barren though, apart from the usual early morning pension burners. They also had a McDonald's, which satisfied my urge or eating nothing but fast food for the whole of my trip. They also seemed to have the highest concentration of cocktail waitresses to square meter of casino floor I've seen, which was a huge plus.

I choose to limit my gambling in here to $50, and find the best way to make it last for 45 minutes before I can register for the tourney at Binion's. I don't know how Pai Gow works so slots it was. I thought slot machines were for the criminally degenerate, and the people on lifetime downswings who were just one spin away from getting even - but this one had huge speakers in the headrest and lights in the floor. I thought it was too cool to pass up.

It was KISS themed, the glam rock band from the 1970s. And each time you'd win it would scream "OH YEAAAAAAAAAAAAH" into your ears at deafening volume and this strobe light would go off on the top making you pleased you didn't have epilepsy. I thought it was the greatest thing ever, and I had great fun just making loads of noise around the people who wanted to lose their money quietly. I was in for $50, I just pressed go and let it ride.

Max credits is $4 a spin. Which got me 12 goes, or around 90 seconds of slot play if I were to lose it all. I'd heard you should always play max credits, and not be a nit grinding it out for pennies. Within 4 spins we had activated the feature. All these little spotlights turned on and started flashing, and it started playing "I Was Made For Loving You" at a universe splitting volume. For all this fanfare, I was rewarded with 8 free spins. I felt the celebration was a bit excessive for what was essentially $32 worth of free play.

I didn't know what symbols paid what, I just hoped for the screen to show more than $50 at the end of it. Which it did. There was a gold Gene Simmonds symbol that was the holy grail of the machine. Get 5 in a row and win some decent money. We hit a long golden jackpot Gene Simmonds and then four full stacks of wilds across 10 lines on the final free spin.

(http://i61.tinypic.com/30wxk09.png)

It paid $3217. The machine starts shouting "ALLLLLLLLLRIGHTTTTTTTT HUUUUUUUGE WINNNNNNNNNNNNN" really bloody loud with the lights going mental and at that point I was being stared with envious eyes by everyone else pumping bills into these machines without winning a bean. Imagine it, you've been grinding slots for years with no success (obviously), then some arsehole kid who's never played one in his life smacks the most obnoxious slot machine in the world on his 3rd spin for $3200 and change. I took the money and legged it, before anyone could figure out which alley to drag me down and rob me. Probably should have turned the sound down a bit in hindsight.

I was happy with the bink. I was more happy to be freerolling this H.O.R.S.E comp. Priorities well in order, we are finally allowed to register at Binion's. It's hard to believe that this place used to hold the WSOP. The tournament area is flanked with rails of discount Las Vegas clothes and dealers wearing this odd yellow and brown attire which made them look like overripe bananas. In for $240, draw a 5 seat so I can see the flop. Which is pretty irrelevant because 3/5ths of the games are Stud games so I would be craning my neck to see boards for 3/5ths of the comp anyway.

Table Draw

Seat 1 - A woman from England that spoke like Mary Poppins who'd never played limit poker, Stud, Razz or Stud/8 in her life. She won almost every pot she was in through voodoo magic and super backdoor wheels. 
Seat 2 - A skinny mute gentleman. Can't give any more info because he never spoke.
Seat 3 - Old guy who looked like Santa Claus with a Vietnam Veteran hat that had dates on it like he got it made for Stag Do or something.
Seat 4 - Lovely old lady who obviously limp/call got there each time she made it two bets.
Seat 5 - Me, hero, and riding a two year mixed game heater.
Seat 6 - Chap who kindly told me a 30 minute history of Binion's without me asking him to.
Seat 7 - Last years winner, middle aged woman who works for Pokerstars who was hot in a lonely housewife sort of way.
Seat 8 - Internet kid, only person in the whole of Downtown rocking hoodie/headphones combo.

20,000 starting chips. 100/200 blinds with 200/400 bets in flop games. 25 ante, 100 bring in, 200 completion and 200/400 bets in Stud games. Good structure with a 30 minute clock.

We dispatch the internet kid at 600/1200 Stud/8 or better where I cap betting pre with (4s 5s) 6s with all spades live. Catch the  2s on 5th street and it gets capped again vs his (X-X) A-Q-Q. We make a 6 lo with the Ac on 6th street and the  Js on the river where he's all in for his last 3000 or so with three queens for a big scoop and 60,000 in chips heading into dinner break. I'd never made a dinner break before. We spent it drinking Vodka and Pineapple at the bar and preparing an acceptance speech for our trophy.

Then it all goes tits up. We leak chips, get quartered three times in Omaha/8 (twice with the high), brick mega draws vs pairs in Razz and we manage to pick up 99 with 16k behind in limit holdem at 3000/6000. We raise UTG, it folds around to the lovely old lady in the BB who makes it three bets. Awesome.

She has KK and we lose. I feel I played well though (with a cracking fold in Stud when I make a flush on 5th Street vs (X-X) A-6-6 who snap 4bets me with Aces full) so no harm done. We were also up $3k through that daft slot machine.

A free evening on Freemont Street, with bags under my eyes and bags in my pockets (quote credit: Jack Salter). We play another slot machine, hit a screen full of wilds for another $400. Then lose it playing blackjack 30 minutes later. I play blackjack with a girl from Canada who really wanted to go to England, so I gave her a £5 note as a souvenir. Her boyfriend comes over and gets all weird and for some reason plonks $1000 down at a $5 minimum table like he wanted to get into a dick swinging contest in front of his Mrs. Kind of ruins the illusion when you buy in for a bag and then keep changing your $25 chips for $5s to bet minimums. He loses some, we win some. Me and the girl talk about Bon Jovi and England while he sits and makes his $5 wagers. 

By 9am we had been in every casino at least three times, and felt we had exhausted Freemont Street this year. Cab back to the Hotel. See the taxi stand man still there doing his thing and tell him of our adventures. He asks when I'm going back to play at the Rio for the WSOP. I get a rush of blood to the head and snap say "now" and he chucks me in a cab to the field of dreams.

We play a $300 2-7 Sit and Go, and get 3rd when we run our pat 8-5-4-3-2 into a one card draw that makes number 4 for a gruesome 7-6-5-4-2.

We play $1/$3 No limit and get our Sng buy in back within 20 minutes when we get in AK vs QQ and flop trip Kings.

We play $1/$2 Big O and do in $250 when our AA22T double suited loses to AATT5 with a T on the flop.

We play $15 a point Open Face Chinese Pinapple and do in close to $1800 in 90 minutes against a Vietnamese guy who spent more time in Fantasyland than out of it.

All in good fun though, and we were still $1000 or so up for the day which gives us three winning days on the bounce. I go back to the hotel, and head to the bar. I meet this American teacher called Chad (I said this was the most American name ever, and spent the next two hours calling him Chad Eagle-Burger because of it), and this newly turned 21 year old kid from Sheffield who was here with his parents. We became this rowdy trio of misfit friends playing craps, chasing women around the casino and drinking tequila from 1am until 7am.

We taught Chad Eagle-Burger various English words and we told him that 'Nonce' was a term of affection and if you say it to someone in England then they'd love it. He goes to bed, and leaves us with "See you nonces soon!". I hope he forgot the word in the morning, because I don't want to be responsible for his potential death.

All in all, a fun day. I played a slot machine for the first time and won a bunch, played well in a comp, almost stole someone's girlfriend and maybe close to bankrupted someone in the process, partied in a dirty casino and played under the 'High Limit Cash Game' banner at the WSOP.

It's all downhill from here.

 

Gotta say- great writing.

More please. And don't leave it a week between posts! :)

Probably the best diary on here at the moment. GL v the slots

More, please. Stayed at the D , brought back some memories from two weeks ago! :)

I had passed hangovers in the morning at this point and now I just felt nothing. I didn't feel particularly normal mind, but there was no general grimy feeling that usually comes with waking up 3 hours after you went to bed annoyed that it's only three and a half hours since you fell asleep open mouthed and face down in hotel sheets that hadn't been changed for 5 days.

I felt I had to keep drinking, or the cumulative hangover might literally kill me.

---

DAY FIVE

I was a bit annoyed about how much money we managed to lose playing Open Face Pineapple at the Rio about 10 hours prior, especially when I freely admit I am not that good at it. I tried to remind myself that it was degenerate gambling money we lost doing degenerate gambling and it was all fair game, but it was eating away at me a bit. I could have sat $5/$10 and probably came out ahead, or at least had a fair run at the $20/$40 limit mixed game they had on three tables over, but I decided to spew. Then I remembered we were still up $1200 from yesterday and it could have been a touch worse I suppose. I was due a spew, and I found some solace in the fact we did it when we were comfortably up rather than doing it in a race to get even.

I didn't particularly want to do anything today though. Weird. All these opportunities to embrace my addictive tendencies with all sorts of nastiness and I planned to lay in my pizza sauce stained bed and watch Netflix all day. Plan ruined within 5 minutes because Circus Circus' free Wi-Fi wouldn't let me stream video. Paying resort fees for a place that has no amenities apart from a death trap rollercoaster which I assumed was powered that morning by my own sense of self loathing.

It's probably part of the problem when you head to Vegas on your own. You're left to your own devices a little too much. Nobody about to say "Let's go flick in some sports bets on games we know nothing about" or "Let's stop eating McDonald's and go for a decent meal". I just cabbed aimlessly to the middle of the trip and straight into the CVS near Harrahs to buy a comically oversized $2 beer to keep the hangover from kicking in and because 'Bollocks, nobody knows me here and I can look like a huge vagrant at 11am if I want to". If the liquor shop in Venetian is giving out free shots at this time, I can wander the streets of Vegas topping up the booze that was leaking out of my pores from the previous night. Got to keep the scales level, because I don't think my travel insurance covered "death by hangover".

I passed through Harrah's to buy cigarettes and I heard her calling. "CIGARETEEEESSSSSSS, CIGAAARRRRRRRRS, ROSES!". The red headed girl of my dreams selling her wares. I'd played out scenarios as to how I'd woo her, and we would live happily ever after with her selling fags and me playing poker and it would all be merry and nice. I mustered up my courage and went over.

I mumbled "Marlboro Menthols please", paid and walked straight out the back. Blew it the second I realised I had a huge sweat on from walking around in the heat, shaking like a junkie because of nerves/mild alcohol poisoning and a general shady nature about me that would get me turned away from a Las Vegas streetwalker. Never mind, she'll be there next year and I'll do it then.

I hadn't been in Caesars Palace yet, so I decided to go and see what was what. Hopped in the $125 tourney that had kicking off half an hour later as a time killer. Greeted by a table of misfits and generally miserable people, bar the flamboyantly gay gentleman decked out in diamonds. He had at least a main event buy in's worth on his left hand alone. I thought he might be a pimp or something, but he told me his husband owned a few Las Vegas pawn shops, which I can imagine do great business in the summer.

We get to the final table before 25 point chips are even raced off. Coolers from start to finish in the whole thing it seemed. 27 runners, with 10,000 starting chips a piece - down to 9 before the first break even showed signs of starting. We went in to the final table with about 35,000 in chips and everyone was reasonably stacked for 800/1600/200 blinds. We lose 2 players within 15 minutes and we end up as the short stack.

We get to around 60,000 when we flop a set of 5s and get it in vs JT on  Td 5s 7c and we just decide to shove pretty much every hand that folds to us now we were on the bubble, and ship every decent-ish hand if someone min raises. We work up to about 85,000 three handed and pick up  Ad 6d on the button. We ship it in, and get called.

"Why are you all in with  Ad 6d?" cried the American.
"Why did you call with QT?" Said the kid from Cornwall.

Ace high holds, and we go heads up with the heir to a pawn shop fortune. No talk of a deal, which was nice. I can imagine with the win here, this chap can buy another diamond in the watch he was wearing.

I'd like to say it was a ferocious battle for the ages, but it was mainly a bunch of raise/folding while he told me about the time he bet a table at Venetian $100 each that he could dance the whole routine to Single Ladies by Beyonce. He did it, they paid up. I almost wanted to bet him that I could still do the routines I learned for my school production of Bugsy Malone back in 1998. But this was Caesar's Palace, and not Fat Sam's Grand Slam Speakeasy.

We get it all in with KK vs AT. An ugly  Ahrt on the turn sends us out in 2nd place with $850 for our troubles and reasonable shot at five winning days on the bounce. Can never run like this in Luton.

I settled on the chicken shop in the Venetian again for my dinner, and had a massive scare when I thought I lost my passport. I'd misplaced my driving license in my hotel room the night before when I'd drunkenly slung everything from my pockets onto the floor, so I was using it for ID that day. Turned out I forgot I had a back pocket on my jeans. Probably not the safest place to put it in hindsight. After yet another healthy meal, I decided I was going to play Baccarat in the Venetian with my Caesar's Palace silver medal money.

I sat in between a couple of Chinese folks all violently scribbling down results of past hands onto a notepad with my $850. My Cantonese isn't that great, in fact I only know one phrase. "Aii Ya". Which roughly means "Oh no!" I think. I was going to take the liberty of shouting it every time I lost. I was sure they'd enjoy that. I didn't get much of a chance to, because we binked pretty much every hand for the next hour and span up to about $2500. Last night's Open Face Pinapple game was now a distant memory. I sat there chain smoking and making 9s vs 8s and every "MONKEY!" we shouted for came in. This was my Macau.

The Chinese guys spoke fair English and taught me another phrase. "Feng". When you get to squeeze the last card in Baccarat and you're looking for a 6, you say "Feng" apparently. "Feng" means wind, and you want to blow away the middle spot on the card that would give you a 7. If I'm ever in China, and it starts blowing a gale, I at least have a full phrase in me that would express my unhappiness at the situation. "Aii ya, feng!"

I got up after a couple of hours for a wander around, and got the first $1k chips of my life. I was already resigned to the fact I probably wasn't leaving with them, so these little yellow and black discs already felt like they were turning to ash in my hands. I was buying into Vegas again. $2k can be turned into $10k, right? I mean I'd done $850 into $2500 already, just a little cheeky double double up and we can punt the main event.

From 11pm until midnight it was all going pretty steady. Up $100, down $100. Up $200, down $200. Good amount of hands tying as well. Then we get the dealer from hell. Every 8 or 9 we got was followed by a 3 and a T/J/Q/K. We bled down to $500, and decided on shipping it all in, the winning streak riding on this one purple chip. We squeak out a win and get back to $1000, before calling it a night when we're back at our original $850 buy in.

I mean we didn't lose, and I imagine drank our way through $200 worth of complementary cocktails, but it was a depressing feeling. I honestly felt like one of those casino punters you see just doing their bollocks night and day despite being up around $800 for the day. There's a reason I rarely play table games back home, they're just so unfulfilling, win or lose.

I end up leaving the Venetian at 6am, count out the $850 we'd won and stick it in the safe. I check my pockets for any extra debris and realise I am one passport lighter.

Just too good.  ;tightend;

Only just read this, very good read :)

It's funny how minutes seem to feel like hours in bad situations. They seem to feel like days when you realise you might be well and truly fucked.

---

DAY SIX

We had been very lucky this trip. Everything seemed to come in for us in one way or another, so it's only fitting that the streak of good luck should crash and burn sooner or later. I'd have preferred it to happen when safely back in England, but even in the 42 degree heat of Las Vegas - when it rains, it pours.

I've lost my passport. I fly home tomorrow.

I retrace my steps in my head for the past two hours, and my heart nearly falls out of my arse when I realise that if I've left it in the back of a cab, it's a long shot I'd get it back. I had no idea what the taxi company was called, what the cab number was or even what the driver looked like. I figure it's kind of an unlikely scenario given I was wearing jeans so skinny that I was walking like I shat myself, so it shouldn't have just fallen out of my back pocket. The Venetian is my only hope, and the difference between going back to a fairly comfortable life in England with a funny story and becoming one of those people who live in the storm drains underneath Sin City.

We get a cab back to the Venetian, and for the first time in a week there is no taxi stand guy. The one person who could probably tell me the taxi company that brought me back to the hotel based on the colour and shape of the car isn't there. I hope you enjoyed your day off while I was suffering mate.

I go straight to the Baccarat table I was playing at a couple of hours prior and ask if I left a passport there. Kind of pointless because I don't speak Cantonese apart from "Aii Ya" and there's obviously a new dealer who doesn't speak English apart from "Player", "Banker" and "Push".

I try the Grazie desk, and they say they have three passports that have been left behind during the night. They pull them out and there are two UK passports, and and Australian one. They take my name, and hold one of the UK passports up to check my grizzled and anxious face against the picture. Then she slides it towards me. I've never been so happy to see my Crimewatch-esque passport photo in my life. The piercing gaze of a sex attacker now looked like a welcoming smile. I could go home now, but I didn't really want to. Funny that. All I wanted was to get my passport back so I could catch my flight, and now that I had it - I wanted to stay forever.

Cabbed back to Circus Circus, with my passport clutched tightly to my chest. I accidentally paid with a $100 instead of a $10 because all the bills look the same to me, and vanished before the driver could tell me. Not like he would anyway. I didn't really care at this point. Once we get back to the room, I find my driving license in the bedside drawer along with all of the prostitute cards I'd collected a few days previously. I'm glad I found it, because I didn't want my name and face connected with a bunch of hooker adverts.

It was about 7am or so, and I was wide awake now. I had to force myself to sleep so I could have one more night in Vegas, so I bought some sleeping pills from the shop on the casino floor. $3, chuck them down your neck and close your eyes. The thing with sleeping pills is that if you don't fall asleep straight away, you start dreaming when you're awake. It can be a very interesting experience. I laid on my bed, eyes closed for about 30 minutes, and we started to have the strangest visions. When you open your eyes, they stop. I laid on my bed trying to will myself into a chemical KO, tripping my balls off having vivid visions of casino dealers dealing blackjack on the beach, and that I was inside a slot machine and could see the inner workings of the reels and there was a rope to pull to ring the bells when a jackpot hit. All very strange. Then it was 5pm.

10 hours isn't a particularly long time to be asleep, but it felt like I'd been out for days. I'd never felt better, and I was very keen for one last rumble at the Rio. Cabbed there by 6pm, paid with the right money this time and registered the 6pm $135 Deepstack. I saw Elky steaming by at a very brisk pace looking quite unhappy on my way into the Pavillion room. The light bounced of his peroxide blonde hair like a hi vis jacket and it made him look like he was bald, pretty funny.

I had about three sugar free Red Bulls during the first hour. Apparently they use a different artificial sweetener in the USA that the Brits aren't used to, and it can make you pretty sick if you have too much too soon. I spend the next 4 hours not sure which end I was going to expel fluids from, back and forth to the toilets every 15 minutes. Today was pain, relief, pain. I hoped it would all come full circle and we would be back at relief soon - even if the relief came after chucking the contents of my stomach into the Rio toilets. On my final dash to the toilet, I bumped into Liv Boeree. I'm not particularly tall but I towered over the girl. She gave me this knowing look, like she was well aware of the issue I was facing. The relief came, thankfully out of the top end of me. I felt well and ready to go on a deep run, but we bust on the first hand back at the table. Pain-Relief-Pain-Relief-Pain.

At midnight we said goodbye to the Rio for the year. In my head I turned it into some over-romanticized moment, like I was Rocky Balboa and it was Apollo Creed and that I had lost the first fight. I stood outside looking at it for a good 15 minutes and just thought about how I am going forward with poker from now on. It's the only thing I want to succeed in, and I fantasised about coming back year after year and being the best in the world one day. I felt like a child who wants to be Superman, and how impossible it all seemed to be. All these people here who want the same thing. Young and old, male and female, every single race and religion meeting here to battle it out for glory and to go down in history. I was never a kid who was supposed to amount to much. I grew up in one of the most deprived areas in the UK, where schooling was terrible and jobs were non existent.  I remember being 8 years old and having to go to school in second hand school uniform because my family didn't have much money back then, eating free school meals and going back to a freezing cold house in the winter. Having to hide from people knocking at the door in case they wanted money, having to lie to friends when they asked why I didn't have a Playstation or a big TV or brand name football boots. Becoming someone here is my apology to 8 year old me, and only when I get it will I finally be content with myself. I finally understood what I am doing this for. It's not so I can show off and be on TV, it's not so I can make it rain and make people jealous. It's so that I can erase all of those bad memories, and be happy with myself. Funny way to try and do it.

We might not have won the first fight here, but Rocky wins in the end.

Gotta fly now.

---

EPILOGUE - DAY SEVEN

Midnight counts as a new day.

I was going to squeeze every last second I could out of this city. I had to be at the airport for 9:30am, to leave for Philadelphia at 11am. I went down to the casino floor for a cigarette, and I ran into my pal Chad Eagle-Burger from the night before. He was with his dad, who spent a good portion of the morning after our antics in hysterics after hearing tales of the night he spent parting with two mouthy Brits. They were leaving in the morning to fly back to one of those nameless boring flyover states, so we decided to have one more night drinking and gambling.

Turns out you really lose your stamina for getting wild and lairy once you hit 70, so me and Mr Eagle-Burger were left to our own devices after an hour. We load up the shots, and try and get comped for as many drinks as we can for the smallest outlay. We hit up some Baccarat and go in for $1000, because it was the most anyone was in for at the table and I wanted one night of feeling like a massive baller.

We sink 9 Vodka and pineapples, and smash the banker bet for $200 a go 13 times in a row at our peak for a $2000 win. The Chinese guys at the table were scribbling furiously on their notepads. I couldn't read Chinese, but I imagine it said "LUCKY PRICK" in jagged little symbols. We finally lose one, and get to say "Aii Ya". The Chinese contingent loved it, they accepted me as one of their own saying "You know Aii Ya! He knows Aii Ya!".

The pit boss offered me a couple of nights free stay off of this, which wasn't happening. I had $200 on my comp card and he upgraded me to the Platinum card. Which I imagine is a bit like being the tallest midget. It's hardly Five Diamond Elite Status. I span my comp points away at high limit slots for a bit, and hit the bar. I split a drink over the video poker machine, had to actually pay full price for a drink and scared two girls away after buying them shots. I took this as a clear sign that the Vegas magic had worn off, and nothing was going to bring it back. 4am. Game over.

Counted up the final result. +$7000 and change. It's not huge chunks to a lot of people here, but it was victory. And victory is priceless.

They board us for our flight to Philadelphia on time. Everyone is sat down, some more eager to depart than others. Then they tell us Air Traffic Control is striking in Philadelphia, and the flight is delayed indefinitely. I have two hours to make a connection to Manchester, so it looks like that is dead in the water. The plane is on the verge of mutiny, like someone is going to jump into the cockpit and fly it themselves. I have a German women who barely spoke English blissfully unaware of all of this trying to tell me that she is going to Frankfurt over and over. Like a broken record. I didn't have the energy in me to tell her it wasn't happening.

They shift us all out, and tell us to re-arrange flights with the customer service desk. A line 200 people long, and me at the back of it. After an hour of waiting, we get close to the front of the line and expect the worst.

"AMERICAN AIRWAYS FLIGHT TO PHILIADELPHIA IS NOW BOARDING". Strike is off, flight is back on. 100 people have transferred their flight and we still have our seat. One last sprinkle of Vegas magic and the English approach to queuing saves the day. We finally get back around from pain to relief.

5 hours to Philly, still sat next to the German woman who seems to need to get up and use the toilet every 15 minutes. We touch down and manage to make our connection the boarding gate for Manchester with 20 minutes to spare. The German woman had followed me to my gate, I guess when I was just nodding along and smiling when she was telling me about her flight to Frankfurt made her think I was going there too. I told her this was going to England, and she freaked out. "MR PLEASE SHOW ME HOW TO GET TO FRANKFURT!!" she shouts, and starts grabbing my arm to drag me down the terminal to show her the way. What happened to German efficiency?

I had to tell her in no short terms to piss off in the end, because it was bordering on assault with the way she was pulling be about. I hadn't been this abused by a woman since Mrs Phan slapped me in the face by accident at the Wednesday PLO/Holdem Comp at the Luton G.

Nicely settled in for the 6 hour flight to Manchester. Choose a film on the touchscreen monitor and tuck myself in with my complementary blanket. It's hard to find happiness on a plane, but for 5 minutes I had it. Until we get told we are delayed for two hours because the aircon is broken and we would boil alive/suffocate if we take off. Next time, I will get an Amtrak across the country and work on a Russian cargo ship for 3 weeks to get home. Would surely be less hassle.

I'd never been so happy to see England. Mainly because it was raining and I was no longer sweating gallons. On the train home, I wrote down most of this diary on my tablet and realised how much I like doing it. It's good to get thoughts out in the open, and you guys are the only ones that get to hear them. This is all from my brain, through the internet, to you. I hope one day to look back on this and see how far I've come, and I hope you guys continue to enjoy it as much as you say you have been.

It was a fun ride in Vegas, if only for a week. It all went so quickly, but it re-ignited my passion for the grind.

We're going to get there. I don't want to be another statistic, or an "if only" story. Hard work, long hours, and persistance. I owe it to myself.

Fight. 

(http://i59.tinypic.com/xmlutv.png)

Brilliant, brilliant read. I have read and enjoyed every word. 

Keep writing please but, whatever you do, don't erase the memory of your childhood however negative it was.

Listen, I know that most of the idle bastards on here haven't bothered to say so, but I guarantee that everyone who read that really enjoyed it.

 

Wonderful read - thank you for sharing :)

Absolutely great read. If Carling did blogs....

Absolutely brilliant and has had me in stitches.  Thank you for the posts.

I lolled at this too...best unintentional rub-down ever

This is fantastic.

Great stuff again Ransom.

+1

Any pics of Vegas?

Well done mate, been great reading. You know you have made it when u get a slap off Mrs Phan from Luton. Catch up soon.

I have a bunch on my phone I will try and get up soon, but I can't imagine they're very interesting or anything you haven't seen before.

Shaky shots of the strip, sly shots of the girls who parade up and down Freemont Street. The usual.

Top diary ransom, wp.

Thoroughly enjoyable.

haven't read it all yet, but agree with everyone else, the writing is top notch.

On the engine sucking thing, I think there have been several people sucked into engines and not surviving and the fella on the carrier was lucky as there was some sort of cover on the engine intake.  I used to share a house with somebody who worked at British Aerospace and sure he said they lost somebody that way.

Pffffffffffffffffftt.

Apart from that, nice read, and a profit's a profit, wp.

Keep it up ransom thoroughly enjoyable!

Brilliant read. Thanks so much for taking your time writing this up.

A fantastic read Ransom wish I could put words down like you and some of the other wordsmiths on here.

I've really enjoyed reading this.

Great writing - highly chucklesome.

I've been home from Vegas for exactly a month today, though it seems like forever. It also means it took me the better part of three weeks to write up 7 days worth of goings on in Vegas, which is super slack of me - the next time I go somewhere fun, I will try and put reports up in a more timely fashion.

I don't have any more excursions planned really, though I am feeling The Battle of Malta in November. Quite a way off though, and I will probably change my mind 6 times before making a decision. It seems like a good little festival to go to, and it's only a 3 hour flight from Luton.

---

I am looking into moving abroad now I am a little more flush with liquid cash thanks to a profitable trip to Vegas. I am currently still living at home, and while it's a comfortable arrangement for me - I'm going to be 25 in 6 weeks and it's annoying me mentally. Out of my tight knit group of friends I grew up with back in Cornwall, only one has his own place and he only moved out because he managed to knock his girlfriend up. He's convinced his Girlfriend looks like Cheryl Cole, I say she looks more like Joe Cole but whatever lifts your skirt I guess.

I can't really justify moving out on my own in Bedford/Luton though, it's not somewhere I would actively choose to live, and I consider myself a bit of a victim of circumstance that I've ended up here for the past 3 years. It's not the worst place in the world, but I wouldn't spend £500 a month for a box room above a chippy on the infamous Midland Road. Moving back to Cornwall is a out of the question too, as it's an hour and a half to the nearest casino and I can't get by on the monthly £7 freezeout in the old British Legion. £5 buy in with £2 juice. I don't care how many wars you fought in, even the Germans would scoff at 40% rake.

I've narrowed it down to Malta or Estonia and I have the following pros and cons for each.

Malta

PROS

- Closest to home - direct flights every other day or so for cheap
- Pretty much everyone speaks English
- Seems super chilled with a slow pace for everything.
- Cost of living is cheap
- Tons of poker players already there
- Several casinos
- Reasonable rent, even better if you can share an apartment
- Tiny island, can get from one side to the other in about an hour
- Nice weather

CONS

- Apparently almost every cheap-ish apartment listed online is bullshit and they're all pretty shabby in reality.
- Lots of opportunity to degen with 3 casinos within 30 mins and cheap booze.
- Pain in the arse to ship all my gear over, new electronics are pretty expensive.
- Locals can be unfriendly
- Mad amounts of bureaucracy, everything is paperwork that takes forever

Estonia

PROS

- Unique location
- Almost everyone speaks English
- Tallinn is a very technologically advanced city
- Cost of living is great, all apartments fully furnished
- Prefer cold weather to hot
- Estonian Tinder is amazing according to other people living there.
- Casino and Poker clubs in the City.


CONS

- Pain in the arse to get to, no direct flights from UK.
- Can't live anywhere other than Tallinn
- Mental for snow some of the year
- Can't read Estonian
- May be limited as to what poker sites are legally available (No Pokerstars.com, only .EU etc)


Malta is winning slightly, if only for the ability to fly back and forth to England for under £100 return. Moving away would really force me to commit myself as hard as I can, and not have the safety net of being able to live at home. Worst comes to worst, I can get a job working at Betfair or something I suppose.

---

Mini GPS is in Luton as I type. I was all set to go down and play a full schedule for it, but I haven't been. I haven't found the energy or the time to go down after being back on the night shifts for the past couple of weeks. I'm a bit disappointed as it looked like great value and more enjoyable than the 25/25 if only for the fact that a small venue like Luton Genting is holding a decent field event on the higher end of the 'small buyin' comps.

I played a couple of satellites to it on the Genting software, and after Misclick shoving into the nuts for the first bullet, and then doing my re-entry in vs a total punter (who was also engaged in the most obvious chip dumping I've ever seen) with my AK vs his 67 for 30bb all in pre, I just couldn't really be bothered to be in for £300 + expenses + potential extra bullet for a £200 comp. The iPoker software really is the nut low and I usually refuse to play on it, but it was a good value satellite for what it's worth. Plus Shane was going to take a chunk of the action, but seeing as he is on a hideous downswing at the moment I thought I'd save him the £140 or so.

I really wanted to play the DC event tonight seeing as my mixed game has come on leaps and bounds in the past few months, but I didn't wake up in time to get there before it started. I have a thing about late registering for live comps. It's just a weird superstition I have, and I feel uncomfortable for the first couple of levels if I do. Plus people love to knock in 300bb at 25/50 and I like to be there when it happens.

Out of the 6 DC comps I have played in Luton, I've won two with a second and a fourth to go with it. LOL sample size, but a lot of the field in these things just pot themselves to death in the first few levels like it's the only bet option available. A couple of the stronger DC cash game players like Jonny Vac are in Day 2 of the GPS Main as well, which would have made my life a lot easier if I played.

The only issue I have with DC at Genting is that they have a tiny amount of games to choose from. Irish - 4/5/6 - Courchevel - Superstud and Superlowball. Have we not passed the point where Irish is basically just taking up space and replace it with a game that's more popular these days like 2-7 or Badugi? You might get one hand of Irish in a DC comp from Terry who picks it for a laugh to throw everyone off, and it's almost never picked in cash games. Last week a few of us were messing about playing Badugi and Double Turn/Double River Omaha and that was more fun than playing the same old DC games. Just trying to emphasize the 'Choice' in the phrase 'Dealers' Choice'.

---

I played the first live comp back from Vegas at Genting last week. £20 unlimited rebuy with a £10 addon at the break. I didn't know it was unlimited rebuy or addon until they announced it, so I was being a total nitball for no reason and was very confused by everyone shipping it in like loons on the last level before cigarette time.

Had to take one rebuy after I butchered a hand vs a bit of a fun player and he got there on the river.

Raise  5c 5d  to 300 at 50/100 from the Cutoff and get one caller out of the BB.

The guy who called just calls every hand and has shown down  4d 8d,  7s Td and  Qh 8h in the past 3 hands, all called down the river with some marginal pair that is never good.

FLOP -  Aspades Qs 2h

He leads for 1000 as an overbet, which I think is far too weird so I raise him to 2300 and he just calls.

TURN -  4h

He checks and I bet 2700, and he shoves for 5200. This is where I screwed the hand up. I thought he had 2x black 5k chips and some change, but he actually had 1 black 5k chip and a black card protector on top of his chips which were on his cards. From my seat I can't see the slight difference in size between the two. It's not an intentional angle, just one of those things.

I have to sigh call it off with my 5 outs or whatever and he flips up  6h 7h. Somehow despite me turning this hand into a car crash, we are winning.

Until he spikes a  7d on the end. Who knows eh.

(http://40.media.tumblr.com/5e87ecc5e828010404a1e070315e9453/tumblr_inline_nrgv1lDoZn1r720iz_400.png)

---

On the second bullet we breeze through fairly well, get AA in vs K4 on 934r when we just get straight shoved into for like 40bb for a big double up. Sit on 120k for second break with 2 tables left and about 1.2mil in play.

Then I cock another hand up.

 Qd Jd on the button at 1500/3000/300.

I open for 7000.
Andy Lyew 3bets to 20,000
Some geezer cold calls out of the BB
I decide to peel the button getting a solid price now.

Flop is  2h 6h Js

Andy checks
Other guy just rips it all in for like 90k
I am stuck in no mans land and now think it's infinitely better to just 4b shove pre now because I am like 80% sure Andy is 3betting wide here.

I tank call it off because I figure that this guy has either just overcalled with 66-TT or some random Ax of hearts that he decided not to fold.  Sucks if he has a set, but if Andy is setting up a check raise after I bet like 23k in position with top pair, then he is gravy and gets it all. 

He has  Ahrt 4h, and binks the  Ad on the turn.

Yet again we do in decent chips by taking late stage flips we didn't really need to take.

---

Cash games were super sparse tonight on Skimpot road. Just me and this other kid waiting for people to come along. I tried reeling some victims willing contenders in, but nobody would take it. So we played heads up for a bit, then we figured we were just treading water so we did PLO flips instead running it twice. They didn't rake us during this which was nice. Managed to finally lose both runs and do in £120 while everyone else who busted seem to be winning chunks on the blackjack.

We had to adhere to the rules by pot/pot/pot/potting until we were all in, despite my requests to make the game £25/£50 PLO to get around this very minor annoyance. Apparently saying "yeah but you can tell people there was a £25/£50 game here!" came across a little patronizing for a small cardroom.

I'm starting to prefer Genting to the G now, and it seems other people are as well. Apparently there was some huge cock up at a late night cash game a few weeks ago where several people were all in and a couple just jammed stacks in so hard that Tom the dealer couldn't do a sidepot because all the chips went flying into the middle of the pot and nobody knew who had how much etc. So the he just said "fuck this", put the deck down and quit on the spot because everyone else went home and there was no floor to fix things. He works at Genting now, surprise to see him there but he is my favourite dealer and usually brings the run good.

Out of curiosity - if you were the floor, how would you fix this?

---

Online has been pretty deece this week as well. Went back to back in Pokerstars comps for double victory. Won the $27 No Limit 2-7 Single Draw and the a $2.20 2-7 Triple Draw the night after. A balling total win of $660. Which got us out of the close to 200 big bet downswing in the limit mixed games that week.

Just need that live win that has been avoiding me since November of last year. We've had a couple of silver medals, but really want to get hold of a live win just to get this monkey off my back.

Using my yearly one time for a £25 Luton comp. Seems like not much as changed in the last year after all!

I can not add anything of substance or experience to your decision apart from go with your heart.

Brilliant bit of writing, really enjoyed the Vegas blog. Hope you keep it going.

Excellent diary.

Did you ever find out how your old mobile number called your new number (or did I miss an answer to that).

glad to hear your happy with how your live mix game skills are improving but id have to say you need to reconsider who you think are strong players in the game if you wish to succeed

Meow Jim

Think u missed out on a massive opportunity in missing the Mini GPS, £220 buy in with a £22k first prize, 43 paid. Great value and a massive chance of a bink right on your doorstep, even the self proclaimed "sickest fish" Will Kassouf went straight from Vegas to Genting Luton to play.

Not playing was a bit naughty really, best option is to write out some lines, 100 of the following please

I promise I will play any event in future that I know Nivarna is playing in, even if I live in Malta.

Ryan air fly to Tallinn from stansted dunno about luton !
I was gonna go to the kings of Tallinn some Scandinavia poker festival in February this year - more for the strip clubs than poker my mate said they are good -the strip clubs that is as all the birds are really fit !!
Battle of Malta is a nightmare playing against loads of Italian players with more money than sense -can u imagine a £1 rebuy at luton ? The Italians play a €550 re entry just like it till they go skint !!  I've been the last 2 years running
 last year was better organised ,but still not good massive queues , not enough staff.  Ridiculous rake better to win a pkg side events didn't run as too many players for the main event
 pkgs can be won on 888 or unibet - I managed it
Malta is a nice place to live, there are regular festivals at portomaso casino ,eg Israeli poker champs , plus others I can't remember but not muchlocal  action with a small player pool unless there's a festival !
The weathers great n the locals love the English in Malta it's a nice place to live I would imagine ,there's plenty of apartments ,a very good bus service ,so you could live a bit further out - where rent may be a bit cheaper - plus there's quite a few strip clubs !!

 :)up ;applause;

enjoying this

do you not play at the G Luton, mostly the skimpot?

not a dig at all.certain players do create an image that makes you think they play a certain way, but when you actually spend time to evaluate what they really do in the game you come to realise that your original position was not a correct place to be.

in a lot of games tight is right, but then no invention or real understanding of the game can hurt how you play more then just if you play loose. being able to evolve and move with the game is very improtant

Do many Cash games run at Genting? All the comps are low guarantees which doesn't really do it for me. If they are taking business from the Grosvenor then maybe they can start to have like a 5K gaurnetee on a Friday night for example or a monthly 10-20K guarantee? Judging from the GPS they can pull in the numbers when something with a decent guarantee is on- Just my 2C

They play a lot of dc games Tuesday s Thursday's quite busy and run nlh or round of each more or less what Evers asked for if there's enough interest they will run it
They have £100 freezes with reasonable gtees and a monthly deepstack around the middle of the month
It's a nice place to play good staff well run for the smaller buy in punters
Eg last Tuesday 145 runners in a£35+£7 ? £2500 gte plus 5 mini GPS seats
Add James simon or genting luton card room on Facebook for what's on

Thanks for the Info. I plan on going down this weekend to have a look. They seem really busy doing the week which is good. Hope they are just as busy on the weekends!

They are a lot busier than you'd assume now, and the staff are more accommodating of things than the Grovesnor staff I have found. If 4 people wanted to play 4/5/6 cash, then they'd put it on for you rather than the straight no you'd probably get down at the G. But when a game breaks, there's not really enough people about to get it started again so you can find cash games ending at midnight quite often.

I guess you have the people from the Dunstable/Leagrave area who only go to Genting who make up the bulk of players in comps, and then a dozen or so G regs will bump the numbers up. There's people I see at Genting all the time that I have never seen at the G before.

They have 2 comps on the Sunday. The DC comp starts at 4pm, and then they have a holdem comp with one addon that starts at 8. The 8pm holdem is usually slow to start but once people drop out of the Grovesnor Sunday, they show up at Genting.

I play at both, with some Vic/Aspers mixed in from time to time.

Where I play mainly depends on what days off I have from work and where the best structured comp is in the evening. The G seems to have gone a bit mental with massive starting stacks in tourneys and no antes (or it was the last time I was there), so I haven't been into playing their comps for a while. 

Genting seems to have calmed down a bit and stopped giving out 30k starting stacks now, so I find their comps more enjoyable at the moment even it is a more expensive place to get to from the train station.

This sounds like a fair point honestly. There are probably players in these games that I think are better than they actually are. Sample size in the live DC is pretty low as I get into the DC game about an hour and a half before it breaks almost every time.

I'd love to get some more time in the DC, but it runs when it runs. I've seen it start at 9pm and break by midnight quite a few times, and I've missed a chance at it by being in a comp.

I think they do DC every Thursday at Genting, but I'm not sure. One of these days I'll just show up with the intention of playing a full DC session, and just hope it runs with a seat open.

Your thoughts on the Luton DC game in general would be appreciated though.

Yeah I feel a bit sick that I didn't play it now. I knew it was going to be solid value, but I never would have thought it was going to smash the guarantee as much as it did. Wouldn't surprise me if the next time we get a full £440 GPS.

Maybe they'll chuck us some more decent comps in Luton now off the back of this one. There's obviously interest for more £200-£500 buy in comps here, especially as we're half an hour outside of London.

I promise I will play any event in future that I know Nivarna is playing in, even if I live in Malta.

Just read this entire diary in one sitting on papadog's recommendation and I have enjoyed it immensely.
Your honest open style of writing is irresistible Ransom,
and I hope you remember keep on posting when you leave us for your adventures abroad.

Great things are around the corner kid, and I want to hear all about it!

True to form it's taken me over a week to get another write up going. I had a pretty fun Sunday though.

Early hours of Sunday morning I get a 4th place finish for $1.1k on Stars which is good for the confidence. Close to +$2k in 2 weeks playing Stars comps which I'm pleased with as I'm not much of a tourney player anymore apart from the odd live Luton punts. And I was like -$600 after a gross couple of days at the $2/$4 and $3/$6 2-7 Triple Draw tables, so it got me out of that hole and then some.

Sunday though! I was heading down to Genting for their monthly £100 tournament, which I affectionately call the Luton High Roller. I'd also not slept in close to 22 hours, but I can pass up sleep for a decent value comp.

It was billed as 'Super Slow', which could be problematic for someone who was going to be as sleep deprived as a prisoner of war by level 3. 30 minute clock though, which is 5 minutes longer than usual so I was curious to see where the Super Slow part comes in. Turns out they chucked in a few extra levels, so we got 150/300, 250/500, 500/1000 etc.

Massive turnout from the start meaning we had 10 handed tables for about 5 hours - maybe this is what they meant by Super Slow. 20000 chips and a dream. Or a secondary dream as I was fading into sleep before it was even time to shuffle up and deal. One Red Bull and dreams of a live win perked me up soon enough.

TABLE DRAW

Seat 1 - Me, hero who hasn't cashed a Luton comp since January and blames it on run bad.
Seat 2 - Friendly chatty guy I see all over the place, always orders too much food and ends up giving it away to the table. Herbal medicine enthusiast.
Seat 3 - Young guy, aggro and generally solid if not a bit vocal to played who make questionable decisions. 
Seat 4 - You know those 50-60 year old guys who play every comp but they all look and sound alike? One of those.
Seat 5 - See above.
Seat 6 - See above.
Seat 7 - Above once more. It's like they've been cloned for the purpose of playing local poker tournaments.
Seat 8 - Manic Turkish guy who plays every hand.
Seat 9 - Internet kid, played with him a bit at the G. Pretty decent from what I remember.
Seat 10 - Middle aged lady who apparently grinds the $109s/$162s on Stars so could be super sick for all I know.

We slowly take down some pots over the first couple of hours to get us to about 32,000 chips, and we get the following.

200/400/50 - We get  Ks Kc in the big blind.

Seat 1 limps.
Seat 2 limps.
Seat 3 folds.
Seat 4 limps...standard chain reaction that ends up with everyone else coming along for the ride. 8 limps to me, and I make it 2500.

Seat 1 calls.
Seat 2 calls.
Everyone calls. 20,000 in the pot already.

FLOP -  3d 8d Kh

Doing backflips in my mind now because I know this is going to end up with me getting it in vs someone with a flush draw.

I bet 10,000, get shoved on for like 8k more. Everyone else folds and I fistpump call it off vs  6d 7d.

TURN -  Js
RIVER -  Ad

Get knocked down to like 7000 chips and a bit of shrapnel. And get sent on break. 15 minutes to mentally recuperate.

We double up the first hand back from break with  Th Td vs the  9d 9c of seat 3, and then win the next pot after to put us back up to starting stack.

Chip back up to 25,000 and this little gem happened.

Blinds 400/800/100

I am in the BB with  5c 6c. Mr Aggro in the 3 seat opens to 2000. Seat 6 calls. I defend for the 1200 more.

Flop  3c 5d 6h

Seat 3 c-bets 3000. Seat 6 shoves for 18,000. I reshove for 23k or so.

All in vs 44 and we hold to peak at around 50,000.

---

Our table is one of the first to break, and I get moved to table 9 which has a few familiar faces on it. 

Blinds 600/1200/100

I have  Jh Jd in the big blind.
5 limps to me. I should be raising here like 100% of the time, but after the last time I just decided to check it rather than make it 8500 and get 4 calls with a Q high flop.

FLOP -  7d 3s 8d

I lead at it for 3500, and get one call from Yaz.
 
Turn -  Ks

I bet again for 4800 and get a call once more.

River  4d

I check, all draws got there and I felt I was a good shot to lose to some funky two pair. Yaz checks behind and rolls over  Ad Ahrt. How about that. Should have lost a lot more there.

---

Blinds 800/1600/200

I have  Jc Ac on the button. One call from the crazy Turkish guy (You should just assume in every hand I put up from this comp, this guy has limped in). I make it 4500, and the BB peels along with Mr I Play Every Hand Ever.

Flop  Jh Td 4d.

BB shoves for 16,000, crazy Turkish guy calls, I reshove 55,000, crazy Turkish guy tank folds.

We hold vs  Kd Qs after the  4h and Jd run out.

100k and peaking.  50 big blinds and a dream.

---

We win one decent pot preflop with AA, and then don't see a single playable hand from 9pm to about 11:30pm. I could feel my brain beginning to rot after no sleep and boredom. By now the blinds had crept up to 3000/6000/500 and we had bled down to about 60k. Twice more through the blinds after folding, and we are the short stack with 45,000 chips and 16 remaining from the total field of 120 or so. 12 places paid.

We get one small double up in with KK vs QQ which felt like I was being shocked back to life with one of those paddle things they zap you with after your heart conks out. For the next two orbits the first card we peeled was a deuce. I was exasperated each time I'd see that ugly little number peek at me from the corner of the card, and I was that short I was praying for one of it's prettier sisters to show up to give me a fighting chance with a pair.

Blinds 4000/8000/1000

We have  Td 8d in the big blind, with 40,000 chips total.

Get a shove from the guy who took chunks off me in the flush vs top set hand from earler.

I have a quarter of my chips in the middle already, and because we're nearing the bubble this guy isn't going to be super light I thought. But I felt I was live enough to get it in the mixer and hope for the best.

He has  Kc Js

FLOP -  Jd 9c Aspades

At least we had the draw. And I needed to draw like an HB pencil to get out of it.

TURN - 9h

RIVER -  5c

Busto in 15th. The live win still eludes us this year. It's an Urban Legend at this point, like Rumpelstiltskin. If I ever see a troll man under a bridge and he asks me to guess his name for three wishes, I will ask for infinite money, a hairline that doesn't recede and one decent shot at winning a £25 rebuy/addon in Luton.

---

It was like 1am at this point, and there was a party going down at the blackjack table. Some kids who work nights at McDonalds in St Albans were there and were each in for £10, and they smashed the perfect pairs over and over for about £600 each. They convinced me to try the same, and we span £25 into about £300. So we got our mincash in the end.

I sat the DC game for £200, and despite it being a £1/£1 the average stack was about £600 at this point in the night. Chopped one decent pot with I had a full house and a 3-2 low vs the bare nut low. Managed to sit for an hour before it broke for the night and come out -£12.

Back at it tonight though, found some chips in my wallet I didn't cash in. It's enough to buy in for whatever is happening this evening, but not enough to justify going all the way down there just to cash them out.

How close can we get tonight? Will I finally get this monkey off my back, or will I meekly sleek back to Bedford with my tail between my legs. Find out next time.

Oh and remember that crazy Turkish guy I mentioned? I think he won the whole comp in the end. 

^ another masterclass from Yaz

Hi,

Firstly can I take the opportunity to apologise profusely for my interjection upon your blog - but I can't help but feel that it provides the perfect sample size coupled with a multiplicity of varying characters that I am sure to derive some benefit from asking a few questions of you and your intrepid following.

As I am sure most of you are all aware, it is with great regret and sadness that Raj has departed the shores of Grosvenor Luton to move on to bigger and better things. That being the case, the boss of my bosses boss has sent me from the dizzying heights of the capital back to my most beloved of venues (and my hometown) - Luton.

There are a few issues that are foremost evident to me and in short order I'll provide a list of these. I am curious, and I hope with your help, that I could brainstorm for a greater understanding of perceived problems, shortcomings etc at the Grosvenor. I'm given to understand that Genting has created a more stalwart following in the last year than was the case when I worked in Luton, and as I have been tasked with trying to restore some glory and prestige unto the Grosvenor once more, I'll be needing some insight and feedback - to which I am hoping you'll all oblige me (in a constructive manner, I hope!)

It's Understaffed, undergoing a refurbishment and so disruption internally and to parking, there's a distinct lack of 'experience' within the team. The tournament numbers appear to be declining - certainly against the figures I analysed compared to 2013 and 2014. That said, the cash game league has certainly worked and the cash games have grown year on year. So, tell me, in your own opinions - what's going wrong?

Hi! I did hear about Raj leaving, I will be sad to see her go as she was always lovely to me - if a bit quick with the rubdowns.

Unfortunately the perceived issues in the cardroom at the G are a hot topic among the crowd who have now taken up residence at Genting. The first part of this will be concerns I have heard firsthand from conversations in Genting in the past fortnight, and then I'll give my two pence worth as well.

---

Some players have voiced their unhappiness to me about the changes to the Min-Max buyin for the 50p/£1 game. They feel the cardroom has given in to the request to change it from a £120 maximum to a £200 maximum by the £1/£2 regulars who have apparently struggled to fill a table recently. They feel it is driving the more recreational players away as the game is now artificially increased to what is effectively a £1/£2 when the game has a near constant £2 straddle on. 

When the people who like to sit with £50 realise their money isn't going as far as it used to or it's getting scooped by the same stronger £1/£2 players, they're going to drive the 30 minutes to Casino MK and play the 50p/50p there instead or feel they're going to have more fun on the roulette. As poker players, we want that money to stay in the Luton poker ecosystem.

There used to be a 25p/50p game with a £30 max on the casino floor a couple of years ago when I first started coming to the Grovesnor, and that was hilariously good fun. Probably unprofitable to run mind, but I don't think I saw any unhappy faces or people waving their handbags about on it. People could pull up for £30 at Midnight and not be faced with a game playing fairly deep as the others tend to do at the same time of night. It was good innocent fun, with a home game atmosphere that sent people home happy win or lose. 

Personally I would like to see that game come back, if only to start building a new group of players who in time will get involved in the tournaments and bigger cash games after a while. All these people coming into Luton for University soon, and a good amount will visit the Grovesnor with their student loans in hand. If they do chunks on the roulette within a week, they won't come back. If a dozen or so get into a small stakes game, they could turn into regulars that visit and play quite often. There's a poker society at the Uni Of Bedfordshire that plays small games in their student union each week. They can't justify £200-£300 for a cash game at the G but they could probably get involved for £30-£50.

---

The general operations of the cardroom have been causing concern as well. On occasions people have called for the floor and there's nobody around, it lead to quite a catastrophic issue which ended up with a dealer quitting (detailed a few posts back). At Genting there are at least two floor people to give rulings around even if there's only one game running.

There have been times where cash game lists have been 20 people deep, but no sign of new tables opening because there's nobody about to deal them. People have walked in to the cardroom, seen the list and just walked straight back out again. I don't know how much a single table of 50p/£1 generates in rake an hour on average, but I imagine it's substantial enough to cover the cost of keeping dealers around for another couple of hours on a Friday/Saturday night. If they can't play in the cardroom, they'll play in the pits and while it may make no odds to the Grovesnor bosses who might only care about profit/loss on the whole building - it probably reflects quite badly on the cardroom who could have pulled in an extra few hundred quid in rake but didn't because there were no staff about.

In short, people are quite displeased about how it has been run recently. One quote from someone I won't name sticks out in my mind - "They seem to have a team of people who don't like poker, so they have no interest in dealing with poker players"

---

Nobody really has anything bad to say about the rake race. It's something that just happens in the background and the requirements to get in aren't insane. There's no loyalty equivalent for tournaments though and I'd imagine the largest group of regulars at the tournament guys. There are some that I swear play every single one, but there's no loyalty rewards for them because they very rarely sit the cash games.

There used to be two tournament loyalty things I can remember -

The Card Protector thing, where you win a comp and get a coloured card protector. The more colours you collect, the bigger rewards you could cash them in for. There was an incentive to play the tournament out and not just chop it at the first whiff of a cash, and it had people playing the smaller field weekday comps to try and collect them (which in turn lead to an increase in runners during the week.) I personally went on a manic midweek grind for about a month as I only needed two more for the £1000 GUKPT seat (thin I know) and then it just stopped without warning rendering them all useless. They just sit on my shelf now, and because they stopped the promotion I couldn't cash them in for a smaller reward like the £100 monthly seat.

The 'Sponsored Pro' league, where the winner got free entry to all G comps for a month. It gives a huge advantage for the winner to retain month after month of course when they're freerolling every event, but Casino MK have adopted this and by all accounts it's very popular.

On the subject of rake race and loyalty, I was given information on good authority that Genting are planning to launch a cash game loyalty promotion with a prize that will ramp up their cash game volume.

---

Whatever happened to the festivals that used to run at the Grovesnor? When Genting ran the Mini GPS for £220, it was jammed all week (and it's only got like 10 tables). I look on Hendon Mob and you used to see all sorts of stuff from 2003-2008 that I was too young to play in. Summer Festivals, Winter Classic, festival this, festival that.

Genting proved the runners will come for a decent week of comps. I get GUKPT comes around for a £1000 buy in one week of the year, but it seemed like the glory days of the G were when there were festivals with a £300-£500 main event a few times a year. I was only about 15 at the time but those more storied veterans of the G might be able to chime in on this.

With a new 240 seat room being built, I imagine things might be in the works, but the only time I have seen the G cardroom stretched to it's limits is when the pub poker leagues have their regional final.

---

There will always be people around to play at the G, but at this moment in time Genting are doing the same things but just better run. There's not much difference in the buyins/guarantees so people are going to play at the venue they feel more valued in.

Genting staff know everyone by name, are more welcoming and generally happy to help you out. You feel like a valued customer in Genting, rather than you're just in everyone's way at the G.

There are good staff in the poker room at Grovesnor that make my experience fun, don't get me wrong. Stacey and Ben come to mind for sure, but everything is still rough around the edges.

I do look forward to seeing what you have planned, and returning to the G at some point soon when changes are made. I'm sure the rest of the former G-now Genting group are the same. 

Just to add a couple of things, I actually think the 25/50 game was bad for other cash games, it drove a lot of the 1/2 players away. And I'm not sure, but George can clarify, I think the 25/50 was profitable for the casino.

I haven't really been to the g regularly for a year, but from what I remember, and what I've heard since, I think the customers have to be held partly responsible for its demise.

Have thought about this for a while.

Have to agree with everything you say.  I played wednesday last week and it started off as 4 tables 10 handed, one of which was self deal!  (I think someone may have not turned up, but, the fact that all of the tables were 10 handed showed that more staff was needed).  Once more staffed turned up they were used for the tournament and as a result, the cash players had to wait longer!

I also played Tuesday just gone and there was an incident of missing chips after one of the breaks.  A camera check was performed, but, quite obviously, there was no camera over the table in question (due to the refurb).  There then seemed to be a difference of opinion between the staff as to how to deal with it (ie, what to tell the bloke who thought he got done over).  Doesn't give the best impression if the staff can not agree between themselves!

I also spoke to a mate of mine who goes in around once every 2 weeks, depends on his shifts at work.  I showed him this post and asked for his opinions.  He told me the following:

There is no incentive with the tournys players like there is cash, the cash has been doing good.  There was an attempt to start a tourny league, but, in my opinion no one tried to push it.  They only mentioned it to regulars.  The only reason I knew about it was because Raj told my mate about it when I went with him as he was "perceived" as a regular.

It isn't a friendly place for new players, very much thrown into the baptism of fire and belittled by regs when they make an honest mistake.  Some of the behavior of these regs if they get unlucky towards these new players doesn't make it very comforting to them.  Not surprised that people turn up and play and then wait a long time before they return, if ever.



He doesn't play cash (played once, lost around £200 and has left it since), but, he did say that part of that was because he isn't a cash player.  The only reason he played that night was because of me.  If the 25/50 table was still running he would probably play that to get used to the differences, then move on to the bigger tables.  As it stands, very unlikely to play a 50/1 or 1/2 table.

When I first started going I found that a lot of regulars seemed offish, when you get to know them you realise that it's only a few that are miserable old gits but they are like that with everyone and don't make exception for new faces. That being said nobody should be made to feel unwelcome and that is the responsibility of both regular customers and staff alike.

I think the staff need a lot more customer service training so that they are able to do a few things with confidence:

1) Control the table, far to often customers who think they know better (and sometimes they actually do!!) push the dealers around, much better if the dealers have a better understanding of the rules/ common sense and are able to control the table (without being like hitlers) as well as able to explain any situation to the floor when called over.

2) concentrate on their job, too often staff will not be following the action or be hold extensive conversations at the table. Of course we would like friendly dealers that will talk to us but there is a fine line and crossing the line can be quite lethal to the customer experience.

A few other things that spring to mind:

 Make sure any current promotions are fully advertised,at times some staff have not be able to explain what the current points system was for the cash rake race, there was also no formal POS detailing the rake race promotion so non regulars would not know it was on, great for regs as it's the same people getting in it every month but would be even better for everyone if more people were competing so advertise it better.

Have more staff available, cash games starting late and table starting 10 handed can be common, no good if you want customers to stick around. Of course it's not cost effective to have staff doing nothing so when it's quiet it could be a problem but I'm sure through numbers you can notice a pattern of when you will be busier and employ more part time staff for those times.

I'm sure there is plenty more that can be done and even though I have said the above I can also say that there are some fantastic staff that work in the poker room that do a really good job and should be rewarded well for it. Of course as well as this the customers have a job to do as well especially if they want people to visit the casino and being welcoming and friendly is a massive part of that.

Good luck on your return George, hopefully you will make a difference.

It might also be an idea to start your own thread for dedicated feedback on the poker room.

It's another late night/early morning for me. I'm actually working from 4pm on Saturday the 15th of August, through until 8am on Monday the 17th. I'm sure it's illegal, and it's not doing the already misfiring synapses in my brain any favours, but if I can pick up close to a few hundred quid sat about doing nothing apart from watching SuperCasino and eating Tesco Value biscuit selections - I'll take it.

Who even likes Malted Milk biscuits anyway?

---

I didn't win that comp in Luton last Monday. Nowhere near it to be quite frank. We were in and out just after the re-entry ended, so me and Chippie just ended up trying to see how long we could make £20 last trying to get lucky doing the side bets on the Blackjack and peaked at £80. Then we somehow ended up leaving stuck £70. Those young lads from the impromptu Blackjack party in the last update were back in as well, apparently I was hilariously entertaining that night and they were quite keen for me to carry on my drunk stand up routine. Shame I only have about 6 jokes in me. Still, Mickey Flanagan is still doing his "I'm going out, out" bit and people love it so I could have recycled a couple.

Chippie gave me a lift home though which was nice of him, even though it ended with us getting lost for ages. He has some great stories about old Blonde Bashes, and he says he'll show up on here again soon.

A few people have been quite willing to drive me the 25 minutes back to Bedford from Luton recently. Maybe they think I'm too meek and vulnerable to stand at the train station at 2am, or they're happy to make an easy £20 and get most of the money they spent on playing the comp back. It costs me about £16 in taxis to get home anyway, I consider the extra £4 a premium for not potentially being shot at.

---

I am becoming more enticed by pit games, which is something that needs to stop. It's Vegas that did it, binking slot machines and a big win on the Baccarat has given me the bug. When I first started playing at the G, I used to sort of stare mournfully at the people on the roulette as their chips got bulldozed down the chute and they pulled out more £50s. During the £100 monthly I found myself on the roulette with no idea what people were saying. I didn't know what 'neighbors' and 'Orpheliens' were. We did have 3 spins, and actually binked numbers on two of them to win about £60 total, but I just felt ashamed of myself afterwards. Despite winning a small amount, I felt like I was one of those people who queue up outside the bookies to chuck their money away playing cartoon roulette on those machines.

The other day I was thinking about going down to Genting with the purpose of playing blackjack. Not even entering a comp. Probably the fucking dumbest idea I have ever had, and I'm glad I realised that fairly soon.

I took to just trying to spin up off the free no deposit bonuses some online casinos give out, and in the past month I have hit BGO.com for £300, and 888 Casino for £425. Almost got Ladbrokes for £300 as well off a £20 150% bonus on a new account, but I gave most of that back and cashed off a £30 profit there. It's surprisingly easy (if not tedious) to release the bonus money if you build up around £50-£70 in bonus play and then play a certain slot machine with a bankroll for 70 spins and move up/down accordingly.

However as I have exhausted my no deposit bonuses on almost all reputable online casinos that offer them, my brief foray into pure degenerate gambling is over. I'm taking the money and running, to use an overused phrase. If you ever see me playing Blackjack or worse, roulette - quote this blog post and I will give you the chips in front of me. 100% guaranteed, no questions asked*. Poker already consumes my life, I don't need to more shit to the list.

*Las Vegas is excluded.

---

I'm going to be 25 in a month. Back when I was 18 I used to think about how I always wanted to be a professional footballer and being ridiculously envious of the 17 year olds playing in the Premier League. Now I am nearing the quarter century marker, I am thinking the same about poker. All these 20 year old sickos, and I feel about 5 years behind the curve. I did take an extended break from Poker from 17-21 years old, so I can probably take 3 years off my Poker age and claim I am 22 in poker years.

It's a strange age for me though. I think that nobody really grows up, we're just kids with adult shaped bodies. You just keep your head up and fake it until you make it. I'm closer to 30 than I am 18 now. That's scary to me.

I can still remember my 18th Birthday like it was yesterday. Down the British Legion because most of my friends were still underage and we could get served our £1.20 Snakebite and Black and then blagging our way into the local nightclub and feeling like proper adults, smoking fags and getting rounds in at the bar in our ill fitting collared shirts. Funny how on that night we were all so keen to be seen as grown up, but as I get older I want to be 18 again.

I'm sure the more 'seasoned' of you will tell me to stop moaning and that I am still basically a bloody kid, but it weighs on my mind quite a lot. Christ I hate to think what I am going to be like when I am 40.

I'll be celebrating my 25th as I've celebrated my 24th and 23rd. Dragging my long suffering best friend around town while I drink myself happy and guilt trip her into coming to Genting with me.

Buy the kid a drink if you see him propped up in the corner by a girl with ginger hair.

When's your birthday?

Friday the 18th.

I've been pretty reclusive recently. Every now and then I go through patches where I seem to vanish off the face of the earth only to re-appear at a random comp in Luton 2 months later. Hope all is well mate, been playing recently?

Not anything major, just a few bits on stars. If you want to go out for some drinks on Friday let me know.

perchance, I just did the same, & agree - an excellent read.

Chompy did me in tonight. And at the first time of meeting him.

Im not one to give the end of a diary entry away in the first sentence, but I feel it's a decent lead in to an otherwise standard entry.


I've not been around much other than the odd DC comp every now and then, but writing about Aces double both ways hi and lo with a 9 banana takes it out me a little.

The short story is we haven't won a bean since September,  and that bean has failed to sprout into a beanstalk of £50 notes and sunnier shores. It comes with the territory though playing live tournaments,  but I remain quietly confident that I will climb the beanstalk and slay the giant at the top of it. Optimism gets you through. Or sends you mental. But someone referred to me as "mad Harry"  earlier so maybe I am halfway there.

£50 comp at Genting tonight. The first of their 10th Anniversary events. I'd missed out on many smaller festival type things as they seemed to have happened back in 2006. Sadly I was both underage and dreaming of marrying my girlfriend at the time. She gained heaps of weight anyway and turned out to be a bit mental so we dodged that bullet.

I went down on the prospect of a trophy. I've always wanted a poker trophy and way back when they seemed to give them out like sweets. Sort of a prop to validate my entriped journey to the top of the mountain. And something to threaten smackheads with  in case they come for me at the station at 4am.

Nice to have Mrs Phan at your table early doors,  even if she and John The Pen are about to beat each others heads in over a hand at 25/50. She was in full swing. Utter gibberish for the most part but you can pick out the odd "yum yum" every few minutes.

I trundled along to 75k at 1500/3000/300. 

Chompy raises to 6200. Has raised the past 2 hands. I reraise to 14500 on the button with Ah Tc. Call. Kind of hate my spot already but 3 cards to come and change my fate.

Flop: A 2 4

I bet 9.5k. C-betting like 3 quarters of your initial 3b amount is standard now I guess, or so I learned from Rupert Elder. Call.

Turn: 5

Check. I jam. Which to be fair is pretty awful in my opinion. Snapped.

Chompy has the wheel. 35dd or something close to it. Down in flames. So it goes.

I hung about for it bit before my train home,  and with  14 left and 13 paid someone called for a bubble saver.

I heard Chompy call for a chop.

Tenderly I remain,  from platform 2 at Leagrave Station at 3.25am

Harry

Unlucky in comp, great read tho.

That is a Red-Dog-esque style tale - a really superb read.

Post more.

Yum yum lol - mr and Mrs phan are brilliant been around for ever or so it seems always great fun at a table with her on it
v good read as ever
Omaha tonight ??
We will be heading down via the bedford bypass if that's near you n u want a lift pm me

Hand review flatters me...

Can't argue with that. Actually felt quite bad putting a Lutonrofflemove on you, but had to be up and about early this morning, so was in crush or spew mode.

Tried for a 14-way chop but no takers, then tried to chop a seat six-handed, with only five on offer. Nothing doing again. Was fumming.

^^^^^^   no accounting for luton SquareHeads

6th again?

Interestingly elongated timeframes used here Scott to be able to use the word 'again' in this context.

Fifth. Sixth is for losers.

(http://www.chipex.co.uk/media/wysiwyg/manufacturer_pages/Seat/seat-touch-up-paint.jpg)

wouldnt know... i usually tidmof  :)

So it's been a month since the last update. And I will tell you why. In a very candid way, removed from the usual pints and 8 high jams and cheer.

I developed a gambling problem..

It didn't take long to materialise. One day it's a tenner on blackjack. Then it's £50. Then your bank balance goes from £17,000 to £36.

Its like smack. Or what you imagine smack feels like. A shot of pure poison into your brain. It grabs hold of your synapses and never let's go.

Thing is,  I've always looked down on addiction. My dad had an alcohol problem, and I always thought he could just stop. But addition isn't like that. You just need one more. Just to block out your troubles. One more and that's it. Just tonight and that's it. Just let me get even and that's it.

I woke up after doing £3000 on TV roulette, and I felt a dread in my stomach. £3000 is a lot of money for the average person, and I threw it down the drain. Just one more bet at the end of your remote. If I am being honest, I felt like hurting myself. But I couldn't.

I'm 25 years old and I shouldn't  be pissing about like this. Thought I am happy in a strange way. I have realised that I'll never reach the top of the mountain. And it's a tough realisation because for years all I wanted to do was to win and be respected. But my brain isn't wired like that. I can't grind pennies into dollars into bags. I get dollars and I want to spin them into bags. And that's OK. It means I'm a normal person. But normal people don't crush poker. You have to be worked up differently. Normal people want the quick fix. Poker players are happy with the grind.


It's time to stop. I feel my pursuit of the golden throne is in vain, because I don't have the make up for it. I grew up poor, which makes me want the quick cash. I can't help it.

I tried. I really did. I really wanted to win and be the best. But I couldn't do it.

And that's OK.

I'm just a normal person. And there's nothing wrong that.

GG.

PS : If I turn this around,  I am never going to be able to sell pieces ever.

Sorry to hear this mate, I'm not an expert in anything like this but I do know something and that's if you have a gambling addiction the right thing to do is to stop all activity related to it. It sounds like you already know this but I cannot stress it enough, going to the casino can be very sociable but is very often to tempting as conveniently we have to walk passed all the tables to get to the poker and even then we probably shouldn't be playing poker. Try and put some sort of block on your internet to all of gambling related sites (which would probably included blonde!), lose the remote control!!

A lot of this can be easier said than done but getting yourself on track with a career/education can help you keep a focus, rebuild your confidence/control/bank balance. One day you might be strong enough to revisit the poker arena but I wouldn't advise it anytime soon. You have admitted you have an issue and that's the first step of putting it right. Goodluck and if you need some support give me a shout and I'll lend you an ear.

Oh man, there but for the grace of God and all.

I totally understand addiction, I think most of us do whatever the varying degrees of intensity for the predilection is.

Only catch you very sporadically on here and at the G but if you ever just fancy a beer and a vape, give me a shout

Just seen this ransom.

Just to wish you all the best with everything.

Just spent the last few days reading the entire blog. As a 'sort of' reg at both Lutons, I've been desperately trying to put a face to your name, but never mind. Like so many others, I have found your blog hugely entertaining, particularly because it's so well written.

I did not see your final post coming, if I'm being honest. The £3k tv-casino spew suggests a drunken tilt reflex, and not necessarily a full-blown degenerate gambling problem. However, it's right to take is seriously, and the only advice I can offer is to get in touch with Eso Kral on blonde. He's been through the degen thing "in spades", and would be a good source of advice and support, I'm sure.

If this has been your "rock bottom", then take it as a positive, since it's usually the place you need to visit before you can start making a recovery. In any event, Ransom, I wish you all the very best with your journey through life - try to keep poker in it if you can, you certainly have ability.

Good post Mr Suited.

I appreciate the advice and kind words received over the past week or so. Sympathy was not my motive for the previous post, but it was a huge weight off my mind to write it.

After time to reflect on the nuclear warhead I have managed to detonate, I've realised that I became a victim of my own greed. It's not anyone elses fault, and I fell into a trap that I used to think was so easy to avoid. I'm not so annoyed about losing money anymore, it's more about the 18 months of progress I have essentially erased. Money is just a means to an end as far as me and poker go.

On the plus side - I don't have any debt, I have everything paid up bills wise and I still have a job that allows me to essentially sit on my arse and watch TV 8 hours a night. I'm probably more fortunate than most in that respect.

I've cashed out my various accounts and I am heading back to Cornwall for a bit, which will in all likelihood be terribly boring but there are no casinos for an hour and a half's drive and I get to see some friends I have pretty much neglected for the past couple of years. There are plenty of bookies, but I've never liked going in them so I honestly doubt I'll be banging my head off a FOBT anytime soon.

I think WSOP 2016 may have to be a miss, so sorry to everyone who was looking forward to another Vegas diary. I mean never say never, but I can pinpoint the day in Vegas that set me on this weird journey of self discovery/destruction, so it'd probably wise to leave it until 2017 unless I am supremely confident that I am able to focus on poker and poker only.

I am confident it will all be fine, as confidence is something I've never really lacked in regards to pursuits I've focused on. It's probably bordering on delusional hubris really, but apart from GG'ing about 80% of my liferoll I'm confident I can just start again at the $1/$2 8Game tables online in a couple of months.

Anyway year one of this diary has come to an interesting conclusion. I wonder how much fun and games year two will yield?

Love that.

Sometimes when we get in a hole, we blame anything & everything, all & sundry. It's best to start by looking in the mirror, that's where the problems began, or it is in my case.

You are a proper bloke.

Enjoy Cornwall, & life, & maybe see you again at some point.

Ladbrokes go 10/1 that you return within the year, & blonde is still alive when you do. 

Played two online comps this week on my sister's Stars account. 2nd place in a 2-7 and 1st in a H.O.R.S.E. About 150 runners in each, so not huge fields but it's nice to do a win I suppose. I let her keep the money so I can essentially freeroll her Christmas present, when I know she is going to use it to freeroll mine. Funny how I've gone from Roffling about in casinos in my own little bubble to being put into small buyin comps online by my own sister.

Always feel extremely confident in the limit mixed game comps. They're great fun to play, as long as you can navigate the Russian minefield for the first 90 minutes. They don't half love their 5 way Stud Hi/Lo pots.

It's such a shame that the only limit mix cash game is the £150/£300 that runs sporadically at the Vic. If there was a £4/£8 or £5/£10 that ran semi-regularly, I would sit in it all day.

--

Leaving for Cornwall on the 9th of December. Really looking forward to going back and having a bit of time away to reboot my brain. Heading down on a flight from Gatwick to Newquay airport on a tiny Flybe thing with propellers instead of full engines. Going to be feeling like Auntie Mable in her little spotted plane.

I used to get the Megabus to Cornwall for Christmas. 8 and a half hours on a coach from London, arriving at 1am. Gave up on them when they decided they had to give up at Exeter leaving a bunch of us stranded in the snow at 11pm. I suppose that's what you get for £9 a ticket.  Turns out it's about £130 to get the train from Bedford to Cornwall, or £140 to get a train to Gatwick and fly instead. Two hours total travel time though is pretty fantastic. Will be having breakfast at home at 9am, and then lunch in Cornwall by 1pm. It'll be less of a beach-side fish and chips and more burger in Wetherspoons, but still.

--

Current plan is to start playing the online mixed games again in the new year. I've sent in my casino memberships so I am out of there for 6 months, that should put a stop to the general punting on pit games at 4am.

Will start with about $2000 at the $1/$2 fixed limit and $1/$2-25c/50c 8game. Will have a 30 Big Bet stoploss each day for the limit games, and will mix in some $2/$4-50c/$1 if there are any funplayers knocking about. I have tags and paragraphs of notes on pretty much all the mixed game players on Stars so I don't feel like it's going to be too much of a job to rebuild from this level. Will keep some of the daily $27 comps for various limit games in as well.

I'll do regular updates on here, because for year long diary, it's been pretty devoid of any online poker content. It's all rigged anyway right?

Like the Six Million Dollar man, we can rebuild. We have the technology.

My Cornish excursion is over, and I am back to reality.

My best friend has a new girlfriend, and the first thing she says to me after being told I play poker is "My brother plays poker, he won $40,000 the other week". Turns out he did a one off bink on a Sunday. One tourney for a laugh, ran like god. Now everyone down there thinks it's easy game. EPT Newquay incoming.

---

Got myself on one of those Bombardier Dash planes to Newquay airport from Gatwick. £115 return, which is a steal compared to a 6 hour train which costs £150. Takeoff at 12:55, in Newquay for 1:40. Those planes don't half make some noise. I was seated directly to the side of one of the propellers, and every few minutes they'd let out an almighty crunch. All I could think about while watching them spin was that if one of those come loose, it's going to come straight at my head.

Newquay airport is awfully tiny. So much so that you have to play them a fiver when you depart as a fee so they can generate some revenue to keep the place running.

I was due to be picked up by said best friend and a couple of others. Nice of them to call me and let me know that they would be a bit late. I assumed it was because they were struggling to find this minuscule airport, but it was because they took a detour to a pub in a place called Roche. Which is almost on the other side of the county. You can't end up there by mistake. I should have known, because these chaps cannot be trusted to pick me up from the train station in the middle of the town without ringing me and telling me to walk to the other side of town.

---

Only one of my friends has managed to move out at the age of 25, and he has only got his own place because his Dad owns it. Which means everyone has taken it upon themselves to move in as well. One sleeps behind the sofa in a sleeping bag. He affectionately calls this "The Bit". He has a perfectly good house that he shares with his parents, but would much rather live in "The Bit". I was due to stay at said friend's house for the week, but I was relegated to "The Bit". Cornwall is weird. It's just how I left it.

We went out to our usual pub called The Spice on the first night. They used to do 2-4-1 drinks, but I put a stop to that when we won some money on an accumy and spent it all on drinks. Long story short I ended up in hospital with hypothermia. Oh to be 21 again.

Finished off in The Miners - asked to leave because "If (the owner) sees you lot in this state he will smash your heads in". The owner is a notorious "scrap metal dealer". Which I think is *nudge nudge" for 'murderous psychopath".

Woke up in the "The Bit" at 9am, feeling surprisingly perky and we all went for a breakfast in this awful little cafe. It used to be nice when I lived down there, but for whatever reason it is awful now. A real job for the health inspector. Managed to fade food poisoning like fading a wrap/flush draw and we went back to get some glad rags on because we were doing one of our Truro pub crawls.

---

We have had a system for the pub crawl around Cornwall's capital since we turned 18.

Meet in the Red Lion - A obscenely Cornish pub. The sign above the door reads "WELCOME TO THE RED LION DINLO MUSH".  - Dinlo meaning "daft" and Mush meaning "person".

Train to Truro.

The Swan - A pub that's changed owners each time we've went in. It's been a music pub, sports bar, posh restaurant, pool hall and wine bar in the space of a year.

Bunter's Bar - Big open plan pub with a pool hall and roulette machines for some reason.

The William - Overpriced pub, middle class types love it.

The Wig and Pen - Posho wine bar. Famous for serving us 12 bottles of wine between 15 of us, going to get us the glasses and coming back to find the bottles empty and the money on the bar.

Wetherspoons for some food. Spend more on quiz machines than we do the actual meal.

The Olde Ale House - All about the ale here. No clue about it myself, but the dreadlocked hippy manager will force half pints of warm, jet black artisan gunk on you for a fiver a go. The kind of stuff that's made by blind Siberian monks and strained through an old nun's tights.

Zafiros - doesn't know if it wants to be a bar or a club. Overpriced nonsense, local for people with loads of tribal tattoos. 

The Riverfront - Someone brought a greenhouse and stuck a bar in it. Full of surfy types called Ollie, Johnny and Charlie. Radical. 

Train back home, then to the world famous Zone club. Famous for winning Best Club South West England 1999 and for having a young kid kicked to death outside it in October.

---

Halfway through our excursion, my friend pipes up and says he will get a tattoo for a laugh. I said if I pay for it, I get to pick it. He'd spouted off too much that he couldn't back out. So I forked out £35 for this.

(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CV-U-r9W4AI4ic2.jpg:large)

---

We saw all the sights, including two people having a Celtic/Rangers row in the street in Cornwall. Someone got called a "Fenian Bastard", and then ended up almost going through a window. I have no idea either.

Went to the club, met a young lady! She came back to "The Bit", was not impressed so no funny business. Can't imagine being invited into a fort made of sleeping bags gets many girl's engines revving, but I was working with what I had.

Turns out in the morning we couldn't stand each other. Turns out she was also off her face on Ecstasy. Could not get out of the car quick enough. Cue me being the butt of jokes for the next 24 hours. Will not be the first, and will not be the last I'm sure.

---

We all stumped up for the boxing and the UFC on the Saturday. Just a great night in with my oldest friends, which was really what I needed after this last couple of months. Something to bring me down to earth and make me appreciate what you can have without chasing a near impossible dream every waking hour of your life.

I'd love to move back, but the second I moved in there would be a queue of people behind me trying to make a "Bit" behind my sofa.

For the time I spent in Cornwall, I didn't think about poker once. I just felt nothing but appreciation and love for the people I have spent most of my life with. Sometimes that's all you need.

Christ I sound like I've been on the Benny Hills now.

"Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law. Love is the law, love under will."

---

Have a fantastic Christmas.

This time next year Rodders, We'll be millionaires.

 

Good to hear from you, cracking write up.

"Fenian bastard".

In the context of Old Firm football rivalry, it's an incendiary term.


https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fenian

Great stuff Ransom. Best dairy on Blonde, bar none.

This ^^^

Great write-up Ransom. You do realise that you have a gift?

Meanwhile, I really hope that 2016 brings you joy in many forms.

ATB, 4K

You write too well to just be writing biweekly updates on here. Write more and for more people

About 3 weeks ago, I played a tourney in Casino MK. My mother was heading there to do some Christmas shopping, so I tagged along with her and my sister with the intention of getting my sister to actually play live poker for the first time in her life.

She's consistently taking $20 up to about $500 playing $1.50 SnGs and then cashing it off, and starting again from $20. I figured a £30 bounty would be a fine way to ease her into it, given that she watches enough of the Twitch streamers who play the PSKO comps on Stars and has a decent grasp on bounty tournaments because of it.

She looked around the casino with this childlike wonder, like a toddler who's just seen some overweight pensioner dressed as Santa in a shopping centre. I warned her that now she's in, there's no going back. She didn't seem to care. We did a lap and I showed her all the games, and she said "Is there usually this many Chinese people here?". "Pretty much" was my response. They gave her a free £5 bet for signing up for a membership. True to form she managed to ride this into about £50 doing £5 a time on Red/Black on the roulette. In a casino for the first time and on a pure freeroll within 15 minutes. She had to really try to lose the free £5 bet chip. Nice life.

They had a Christmas promotion on where if your name was called, you got to spin this wheel of fortune to win some money. Prizes were from £25 to £1000. They called out about six people who weren't even there, then they called me up. Butchered my name mind, took me 30 seconds to be sure it was me and than I didn't shoot up there like a greyhound to find someone else on it with a similar name. I had to do a full 360 degree spin of the wheel for it to count, and it was a pretty big wheel. So I span it as hard as I could, and it took a full two minutes for it to stop. Tapped into my inner Geoff Capes and almost ripped it off it's plinth. A sort of awkward silence developed, as this geezer on the mic ran out of things to say. When he was calling out the names he was full of jokes, get him on the spot and he's suddenly forgotten how to speak. Brag - won £100. Beat - two spots earlier was the £1000. Not bad considering about 80% of the spots were for £25. Variance - dusted it off within about 5 minutes.

Casino MK has this section on the casino floor under a banner that says "LOW STAKES CASH GAMES". There were 5 people seated for a 25p/50p game with a £25 max buyin, so me and my sister decided to join to get a game going. It felt like I was being put into one of those special groups in school, the ones for the slower kids. Which is a bit of a dumb thing to say because I usually play £1/£1 or £1/£2 anyway which is hardly advanced wizard GTO whatever, but with a 10% £5 max rake it was probably unbeatable. They don't half take that game seriously though, mostly by a couple of arsey nit regs. My usual assault on these types is to just straddle beyond their comfort zone whenever I get the chance. I was able to get a £2 straddle on quite a lot, but my other motive was so my hyper turbo whizkid sister could play in situations she was more comfortable in being 10-15bb effective so she could hopefully win some pots and not think live poker was 80% boredom.

"Put your chips in, close your eyes and pray to John Nash."

We both made out with about £40 from poker primary school and went to play this tournament. There's not much atmosphere in Casino MK's poker room. Genting Luton is really tightly packed together so it has a bit of a boiler room feel which I like, but all the sound seemed to seep out and take the vibe with it in MK. Kind of soulless really.

We both got seated at the same table, which was a bonus. We also had this guy who was clearly three sheets to the wind, half deaf and playing his first ever live comp as well. I make some fairly normal call with 44 when he check/check/massive overbet relative to the pot on a brick river and he goes off on me. Just moaning for a bit and they call the floor on him to settle him down. Nice as pie to me after that.

The same guy tries to call a 3x raise but is so pissed he fumbles his chips and ends up making it about 6000 off a 600 raise. I have to pass, but my sister just comes straight in with the cold 4bet shove. Obviously picked up on this epic misclick, fold fold and she shows the 9 high. Level of pride I felt was off the chain, I imagine it's akin to your child's first day at school or something. Naturally the guy moans at me again.

I bust sometime after the break with 88 to AJ chasing bounties. Sister final tables and gets 5th. Now all I hear is "When can we go again?". She wants to go play the DC in Luton, she's looking at sats to live events on Pokerstars and she's sorting out her passport because she wants to come to WSOP.

I did tell her that once she's in, there's no going back.

---


Thanks mate, all the best to you too!

Truth be told I really enjoy writing this, and I look forward to playing live even more when I think there's a chance I might get a blog entry out of it. I'll keep this going as long as people still want to read it. Maybe I can parlay this diary into something bigger, who knows!


I plan on updating a lot more in the new year, though I will be cutting back the live stuff because of the casino self-exclusion due to the massive degenerate gambling orgy I went on.

I would love to write for more people, might send in a sample to some poker websites/magazines and see what they think of it. Worst comes to worst I might get some pointers at least. How are you getting on? Still playing?

Excellent report as always,though i think it could be improved with pictures.Perhaps one of your sister to start with.   ;)

Couldn't agree more.

Excellent updates as ever mate :-)

Great stuff

+1 for pic of ur sister Ransom.
+1 for investigating writing opportunities (If travel is feasible, tourney updating for GukPT, APAT etc may be an entry point; if not, a link to this blog should suffice for all the poker publications - both on&off line)

Happy New Year!

I didn't go out on New Year's Eve. I never do, instead I was in bed by 9pm. Obviously rudely awoken at 12:01 by enough fireworks to trigger an alert at the army base in Chicksands. If I were 90 years old I'd be having flashbacks to the Blitz. 

Up a 6am, straight onto Pokerstars. Cash games were dead (or at least the ones I wanted to play), so I chucked in a $2.20 6 max to click through over breakfast, and won it. 243 runners for a $133 win. Not a large bink, but the confidence boost was immense and a great little way to start the year.

(http://i66.tinypic.com/2ii9185.png)

Went into heads up even with about 400k each. The guy I was playing would lead every flop for pot out of position almost every time, and then pot a large majority of the turns as well. I just let him punt off when I had a hand, and that was that.

Final hand I min raise  Td 6d and he flats.

FLOP :   Tc Kh 8h - He pots as expected for 22k. I call.
TURN :  4c - He jams 206k. I call. He'd never overjammed before, but would often size less than pot with value hands. Just felt it was FOS. He has  Jh 9h.
RIVER:  2c - Big fade, little win, happy days.

So we are one for one in tournaments in 2016. It's not going to last past this afternoon I imagine, but for the last 6 I have played online, I have final tabled 5 and won 2 with an average field of about 250. So that's nice. Maybe something I should press on with and ride this little heater a bit more instead of playing the 5 Card Omaha Hilo cash games which have turned into the nittiest games on Stars this past month.

I know there's a sit-out on to protest Amaya and their murdering of the VIP program, but nowhere else has the traffic for the cash games I like and hardly any other sites spread the mixed games so I am kind of stuck. It feels a bit like that scene in Billy Elliot where all the miners are on strike and they start kicking off at the people who have turned up to work. I'm breaking through the picket line to try and make a few quid.

Denying all requests for pictures of my sister, you degenerates. You'll know who she is when you see a female under the age of 40 playing £30 tourneys in Luton, checkraising fools and turning down deals because "no gamble, no future".

Might stop now and have a profitable year. Just lock it up.

 

Evening all.

I know I made a promise to post more, but apart from the extremely mini win as detailed in the post above, January was pretty dry on the poker front. Didn't have the energy to play much at all. On the degeneracy front things have been dry as well, minus one slip up when I went to MK and ran into Chippy and we had a couple of spins. That went tits up as expected, but another lesson learned and it was far, far less costly than the previous ones. Given that MK is such a pain in the arse to get to from Bedford without a car, I can't see myself doing that very often if at all. I spent some time a while ago registering for all the bookies online, and then self excluding from them for the maximum amount of time.

February has been pretty good. Cashing off approx £2k profit from PartyPoker this past week which I am very happy about. A combo of 50NL/100NL and a couple of completely underrolled shots at 200NL that worked out. Little bit of PLO chucked in for variety. Combine a bit of a heater with a fairly soft playerpool on Party and you get a nice winning week. I'm not one to go and 'tap the glass', but there are some players on Party that make some truly baffling decisions.

I can't say I was ever a huge fan of PartyPoker. The software was always really buggy for me, but when there are people playing 65/6/0 at 100NL/200NL I can live with it. Won a few $109 tickets from the $22 feeders as well for various things at DTD but was unable to convert them sadly. I wouldn't go to DTD for anything less than a £530 seeing as I would need to get a hotel for a couple of days, so I would have liked to get in to the UKPC but so it goes. Got close to winning a WPT package as well for one of the side events, but managed to Bonnie Tyler it 3 handed with a nice chip lead (because every now and then it falls apart). Would have liked a nice excursion to Vienna in March.

In other news, Grovesnor Casinos have deemed it unsuitable to allow me back on to the premises for "my own best interests". I sent an email regarding reinstatement as I have a chip on my shoulder about winning a GUKPT. I think mentally I want to follow the progression of a lot of UK pros. Win a GUKPT, then something on the EPT, then the WSOP. But then "my own best interests" dictate that I probably shouldn't be hanging about in casinos and getting carried away when people I know want to throw a bit of money down the roulette chute. I'd liken it to that girl who can't keep her knickers on after a few drinks. Not saying I'm being preyed on by degens because they know I'll 'put out' and come over for a 0, 28 by £5 neighbors after  a couple of pints, but it's what it can feel like. 

But then I am going to Vegas this year. Is it strange that my first thought was about looking forward to writing another Vegas diary rather than how much LOLpunting I can do in comps? That's probably a good sign for both myself and everyone who reads this.

My plan for March is to play a solid schedule, put some runs together by summer and have some fun. Rebuild my reputation and be as much of a consummate professional type as I can be and do away with being tagged as a volatile punter waiting to explode. Also get back to a point where I can leave my job because right now I am wondering how much rotational force it would take for me to spin around in my chair and have this headset cable pop my head off like a champagne cork.

GL GL.


 

Ha, beautifully written.

Post more please.

Thanks for the update Ransom. Probably like most of the other readers here, I regularly check to see whether Luton Calling has shot up to the top of the Blog page... Wait, most of the others prob have some kind of sexy tekky alert.

Anyways, I specially like the Bonnie Tyler teaser. I spent at least a whole 30 seconds wondering if the reference was "It's a Heartache".

Do you ever just do things on autopilot without thinking?

I do it pretty frequently. I arrive at places with a big blank gap between leaving my house and showing up often. Like the static you used to get on your old TV when you accidentally put it on Channel 6. A sharp gray and black blizzard of pure white noise. I seem to have autopilot-ed my way into booking Vegas for June. Last year I booked it in January, and faced 6 months of torturous wait before I could descend on the desert, knock about among the neon and punt in the Palms (I didn't go to the Palms, but rule of three for comedy/alliteration and that).

Direct flight from Manchester, and 10 nights for £1006. I would have saved £50 by going back to Circus Circus, but I think I was supposed to pay them a resort fee which 'accidentally' slipped my mind. Would hate to show up and have them pull a couple of heavies out to have a word with me in the back room over $200. Stratosphere this time, mainly because it was cheap and they have a 50s diner apparently and I've always liked them.

Could have stayed at The D downtown for about £920, but I'd spend that £80 difference and more on taxis to the Rio anyway so I couldn't see much point in it. Plus I binked on that machine there last year, and I'd hate to spend half my trip trying to do it again on the same terminal like that old lady from the Louis Theroux documentary.

Flight wise, it's with Thomas Cook. I'm not one for luxury, so as long as they bring me a lemonade every hour and give me a sandwich halfway through I'm away. Never flown Thomas Cook, and right now I am picturing a flight half full of retirees and half full of lairy stag parties.

Flying from Heathrow for the same price was an option, but I would have had to stop in Salt Lake City. Home of the Mormons. Really stretching to fit in a Chris Moorman joke here but I have nothing. I did a stop last year, and while it was interesting to share a bench and chat to a army veteran who looked like Hulk Hogan - I'd much rather daydream about big scores for 10 hours than cart a suitcase around searching for my gate before they close it.

Now while writing this I have looked at the WSOP events for the time I am there (you think I'd have done this before). And I am there for the $1k tag team event. Anyone looking for a partner? We will have to dress in matching gear, the more we look like wrestlers the better. Sorry but that is 100% a dealbreaker.

It's funny how much things brighten up with you have something to look forward to. Plus I brought about $15 in chips home last year as souvenirs, with the way the exchange rate has gone I am taking them back because I've made about £1.87 on them. FOREX punter as well now. Baby steps.

L F G

I should really research things before I do them.

It's a particularly big leak, and I think if you go back about 6 pages before I went to Vegas last summer I probably say the exact same thing word for word.

I get carried away with looking at reviews, pictures and trawling Google street view as soon as I've booked something. Then when I see all the one and two star reviews I get a sinking feeling. Like I've just paid a bag to develop an aggressive infection from whatever part of the room might come into contact with my bare skin. Still, Stratosphere has a poker room and I can't imagine the competition would be too stiff in there so it should be nice for a primer before I head out to the better card rooms.

From doing a customer service related job for the past two and a half years, I get that people are much more likely to take the time to write a complaint than a complement so I can't give much weight to the bad reviews really. Especially when you should really know what you're getting into when you pay $30 a night for a room so far at the top of the Las Vegas strip you're basically halfway to Reno. Shouldn't be so bad though, remember I was pretty impressed by Circus Circus so you could probably stick me in a tent on a bit of wasteground and I'd probably describe it as "adequate with interesting scenery".

The area behind Stratosphere is a 'no-go' apparently, and it says online that taxis won't even stop there. The 'Naked City as it's apparently called by locals.  I don't foresee myself wandering about there but it's interesting to think about being in a casino and being 2 minutes walk away from crack dealers, enough weaponry to take on ISIS and disease riddled prostitutes. But then, you could probably find that around the Luton G if you looked hard enough.

Thomas Cook kindly charged me £20 to choose my seat as well. It's a small price to pay overall to avoid drawing the short straw and getting the middle seat in the middle aisle, but this is a £700 flight and not a Ryanair job. I think I read somewhere that they charge another £5 to use the in flight entertainment thing too. Still, I have to have a window seat to rattle my head off and for that 2 minutes of excitement after take off where you look out of the window and think "If these engines give out now, we're all going to die".

I'm going to be there for the tail end of the Colossus, which if it is anything like last year will mean that cash game lists have a waiting list as big as the population of a small island nation. So there is likely to be some very fun 2/5 games filled with people scrambling to get their $565 buy in back before they fly home.

On the online poker front, it's been pretty breakeven to slightly losing after cashing in some Starscoins this month. Mainly playing 8game $2/$4 and losing the most at Omaha Hi Lo. Usually do well in that round, but it's been pretty savage this month. Losing something like 80 big bets in one session of 8Game was unfortunate but I find that the vast majority of the 8game pool at $2/$4 really struggle with Stud Hi Lo, so it tends to be my most profitable game in the rotation. Shame the straight up Stud Hi Lo games have such a big collusion problem or I'd play that more than anything else.

I think they run live Stud Hi Lo in the Orleans or one of those off strip casinos. I know they have a mental $4/$8 limit Omaha Hi Lo there that is almost always 6 ways capped to a flop and people capping until the river with 67TJ (two cards for hi, two for lo innit) , so I might get myself over there seeing as Uber is in Vegas now and it'll cost me like $10 each way.

PartyPoker have a Grand Prix mini in Milton Keynes which might be worth a look, probably do the day 1 online and try and see what happens. Maybe it'll put a bit of atmosphere into the place, because the last couple of times I've played there it's been people sweating their football bets on the telly and maybe playing a hand during half time.

Until the next one,

GL GL





 

''for that 2 minutes of excitement after take off where you look out of the window and think "If these engines give out now, we're all going to die".

Nice to know I'm not the only one who does this :)

I think the seat back entertainment is free on Thomas Cook, but they charge for earphones if you need a pair. It was on a loop and very limited when I flew with them back from Vegas 2 years ago, but I think its on demand these days after a refurb of their long haul fleet.

Looking forward to more Sin city reports, always a great read.

There was 7CS 8/b running at Bellagio and the Sun Coast (in Summerlin!) but the Orleans one hasn't run much for ages. Strat card room is awful but they used to have a decent comp the last Saturday of the month last time I was there.

Will certainly be in the 4/8 and 8/16 O8 at Orleans as several tables run at peak times and always very loose.

FYP.

I stayed at the Strat several years ago for a few days. They offered a large suite for peanuts, so I took it.  I'd recommend at check-in blagging/greasing/paying your way into a 'Select' room.  When I was walking along the corridor to my room, I could often see maids cleaning these rooms and they looked pretty decent tbf, more than an improvement on a medicore hotel mid-strip. 

Not sure if you can drive or not, but renting a car is going to be useful, particularly if you are playing @ Orleans a lot.  $10 ew in Uber is great, but you can rent a car for about the same.  All around the strat really is a cr@ppy area, don't be tempted to walk over the road for middle of the night Carls Jr etc.  At the point where you have a big piss patch on your shorts and a little bit of sick in your shirt, the menu in Roxys Diner is 24hr and will do the job for pennies. 

Great blog mate...

New to Blonde myself but I am based just outside of Luton in Milton Keynes and can be classed as a 'semi reg' up G and Genting...

My name is Adam, sure we must of crossed paths at the felt before but can't be the name to the description you previously gave...


I am also flying from Manchester with Thomas Cook for 10days in June.... What date are you flying? Im leaving 8th June till 18th June.

Welcome Adam, finally, you need to get all the other Cats to sign up! You would recognise Ransom if your saw him, although he still might be self barred from G. You playing the monthly at Luton this weekend? If I'm not working I might make it over.

Hi!

We have probably crossed paths at least once, would have been hard not to as I was putting in a decent shift in Genting a while back.

Leaving on the 5th from Manchester until the 15th. Same flight, just 3 days apart. Will probably be playing mixed game comps as there are heaps on during the time I'm there.

My G exclusion is up, but they won't let me back in regardless so I guess it's technically still on at the request of management. Genting one expires in about 2 weeks, but I'm not in any rush to get it back. Will probably go in and re-apply for it after Vegas, don't want to seem overly eager to get back in the casino. 

Is this your first time going to Vegas/WSOP? Def come and say hey at some point, I did it solo last year which was fun but being left to your own devices for a week in Vegas can send you a bit mad.

Did you do what I do and just buy the cheapest package you can find online and end up with a decent flight but a 3/10 hotel?

Palazzo/Venetian prices are very good at the moment as part of flight+hotel packages.

Decent, I think Im only focusing on the deepstacks that are coming up at Luton G or Genting, the mid week evenings are taken up by me playing online.

Will definitely say hello if come across each other out in Vegas, although Im not sure what you look like..... Either way, I'll be the lad stumbling out a strip club with his breakfast waffle mess still around his mouth looking what tourney to play that very day........ Then again, Im sure there are many that will live like that in Vegas.

I got the cheap flight as my accomodation is already sorted, Im in a stable of players and they have an apartment out there so least that is all sorted! It's 15mins from the strip but I hear Uber Cabs are smashing it out in Vegas now?

Only played ~20 tournaments online in March, won 4 of them. Two 6max, one PLO8, one NLO8.

I have such a love/hate relationship with tournaments. Love/hate in the sense that I love winning them, and I hate losing.

I've decided I hate regular speed tourneys, and I love turbos now. I hate full ring and I love 6max. And I especially love it when the stars align and there's a 6max turbo NLO8 progressive knockout.

Love and hate has started to become a common theme in this diary. Bipolar game selection.

---

Less than two months to go until Vegas now. Two months is both ages away, and pretty bloody soon at the same time.

I suppose it's relative to the event that's happening at the end of those two months really.

"It's my birthday in two months" - ages away.
"I'm being executed for treason in two months time" - quite a sense of urgency.

I'm pretty much all prepared. I'm very low maintenance, I don't plan ahead. I will just bung a load of clothes in a suitcase and go to the airport on June 5th at 4am. Cannot see how this will backfire seeing as my wardrobe is basically 85% hoodies, jeans and jumpers.

All the tourney schedules are up now for June, and there is a ton of mixed games on. Last year I managed to get into one $320 HORSE, but this year there's Razz, 2-7, HORSE, 8game, Big O all within a 5 day period. What a time to be alive eh.

---

Thinking back to last year, I remember that I missed out about half the casinos on the strip. I only crossed over the road to Cosmopolitan/Bellagio once and didn't venture past Planet Hollywood. I would always reach PH and then just turn back around. Can't imagine there's much that I'm missing out on in Luxor or Mandalay Bay considering I'm not into fancy restaurants and I'm not going to be into seeing any shows, but at some point I want to make an effort and do a tour of all the casinos.

I was thinking of doing the roulette tour as seen on TwoPlusTwo. $5 on 4 numbers on roulette in 10 different casinos. If you win one you're freerolling. But then seeing as I've managed to turn a page regarding general degeneracy and pit games it might not be totally wise. I did a cash game variant last year where I played cash in as many casinos as possible in a day, but if you find a good game there's no point leaving it to go play $1/$2 in Excalibur.

I much prefer shit casinos anyway.

---

I've played at Casino MK a bit, maybe 3 sessions in the past 3 months. And Christ are the regs there miserable. I was wondering how it's the same 10 people there every time, and it's because the regular players drive everyone away.

Last cash session I played, there were a couple of suit wearers at the table. I imagine they were on some sort of business in the area or in after work. Casual players anyway. Bought in short, limped a lot, questionable decisions all around but they seemed to be entertained and were both picking up pots here and there. Didn't take long for a couple of hoodie wearers to sit down and start berating them from the off.

My standard behavior when this happens is to act like the most clueless know-it-all in poker and give absurdly bad advice on hands that nobody in their right mind would take, misuse poker terms and make outrageous claims.

"I'm folding kings there pre, it's GTO"
"I'm getting 3.742/1 there, snap call all day, it's auto profit"
"I mainly play online, PLO on untracked Russian sites because Stars rake is unbeatable".

It usually takes the heat off the casual player, and I don't care if I look like a fool so some people can play poker for a couple of hours in the evening without feeling like they're going to be attacked.

Not all heroes wear capes, but sometimes they will tell that you should raise 8x big blind and 2x pot flop every time at a £1/£1 game and that the only pure game left is Full Ring holdem on Adjarabet.

GG

Yeah Uber/Lyft is in Vegas now, and is probably half the price of what regular cabs would cost you.

As far as strip clubs go, not particularly my thing, but there is one across the road from my hotel that is apparently reasonable. If I have a good run I could be tempted to make it rain, cross it off the bucket list.

You could bowl out of a strip club at 6am with the dregs of a bottle of Grey Goose in your hand, drink it with your breakfast and then play a $60 12 man tournament with a terrible structure in the Rio at 7am. The dream. 

Heaven for you @ Binions, if you like mixed games & shitholes.


(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpf1/v/t1.0-9/r270/12974414_10153605302483063_3971733976773835973_n.jpg?oh=9fc2c3727784c30a2a0de1c6720f5830&oe=5772E12A)


Unfortunately I arrive just after you leave, so my dead money won't be in any of the prizepools ;D



At least the uber/cab will be cheap, if you're at the Strat.

It might be a sad state of affairs when I am very excited to play multiple Binions tournaments on that mustard yellow felt. 

The 6max on the 5th looks fun, but I arrive at 12pm, then customs and then check in at the hotel will put me just outside of the late reg time I'd imagine. Even if I was fortunate enough to get checked in and ready by 1:30pm I'd be too shattered to even think straight.

I will be in the HORSE, and then either the 2-7 or Razz depending on what time I am up and about that day.

Quite fancy my chances there. Either in poker or with a 75 year old cocktail waitress.

I love playing at Binions, even though it's obviously super old etc.

Most of the cocktail waitresses are great, and drink service is always good, in my experience. They love it when Tikay bowls into town, and makes them feel young again.

Walk down Fremont Street after 9pm, and you'll pick up multiple suitors, of various ages ;D

I shall be heading to Genting tomorrow to play Day1a of the £17k GTD Comp...

Anyone playing?

We might have to change the name of this diary soon.

A whirlwind of a month really. My family are up and away to move to North Wales, as my grandparents are ill/really old and need looking after. Me and my sister have declined to go, so the Euro dream is now reality. Got about 2 months to get everything together and get away.

We've got a prospective apartment lined up in Tallinn, Estonia. All furnished, high speed internet and it looks like the inside of a spaceship. TVs built into the walls, voice activated this, phone controlled that. And it comes with a Sauna. 15 minutes by tram into the Old Town. You can also get a train to Moscow for like £25 if you fancy a weekend adventure. Seems really nice, though I suppose if pictures on the internet told the truth, we'd all be shacked up with 10/10s from Tinder.

I'm not very politically minded, but if it's decided to leave the EU, then the Baltic adventures would be off the agenda as I would have to go through the VISA process and I have little to no redeeming qualities that would see me get a big green YES stamp on my application. So as insurance we're also lining up one in St Paul's Bay in Malta as it's part of the British Commonwealth and it won't be affected (I think).

---

It's a slight spanner in the works as far as Vegas goes in a month's time. If I could get a refund on the holiday, I would have done it and then sorted out this apartment but no changes, no refunds, that's what you get for being tight and booking with the cheapest site on a whim.

It sort of adds a bit of a narrative to it I suppose, which will be good for the Vegas diary. Does Harry live out the rest of his days in the Sun/Snow, or does he end up living with the sewer people selling bottled water outside Harrah's. Never been shy of a bit of drama, me.

The Vegas roll is now limited to $5000 down from the planned $8000. Which is fine to play $300 comps, $1/2, $1/3 and $2/5 for 10 days.

Loose schedule as follows -

Razz, HORSE, 2-7, 6 Max at Binions and Nugget - 4 x $240
Big O and DC at Planet Hollywood - 1x $240, 1 x $130
WSOP Daily - $235 x 2
WSOP Satellites to whatever is on that way, max buyin $300

That's like $2400 in estimated buy ins. Will fluctuate as some comps clash, but that seems alright to me.

My kingdom for a trophy. My life for a min cash. All on the line this summer. Better win.

"Glory follows virtue as if it were it's shadow"

The heat is well and truly on.

The whole house move is causing untold stress. Family have decided to just up and move as soon as possible. Me and my sister were told that everything was paid up until the end of July, which was fine as we had plenty of time to get sorted. Come down one morning to find almost everything I don't own that's not nailed down packed up and being shifted off to a storage place. My mother is notorious for not telling you anything, and would rather climb a tree and bullshit you than stay on the ground and tell the truth. Finally get told yesterday that they're off in 2 weeks "for a month to see how they get on", which means "we're off at the start of June".

I wouldn't usually be bothered, but I can't help but feel they are trying to make this as difficult as possible for me. Me and my mother's husband (saying stepdad at 25 sounds too weird) very nearly ended up in the garden for a square go the other night when he decided to get drunk, let my dog run free and then have a pop at my sister at 1am while she was in tears after running around the town all night looking for him. 12 hours and a £50 reward later we get him back, though we had to walk 2 miles to this house where he came out smelling of Superkings. Some night that dog must have had.

My mum's husband has always been a passive aggressive little arsehole really, but we've got on by staying out of each other's way. Now he's taken his micro-aggression to a new level. Saw him the other afternoon scraping a shovel against the wall for a good half an hour right underneath my bedroom window when he thought I was asleep before work at night. We are engaged in this odd little war where I think he is trying to get me to blow up in front of everyone, but I soul read it months ago. Plus he's like 60 and would crumble like a man made of Weetabix if laid a finger on him.

The estate agent in Malta is 100% on us being able to move in as soon as we pick somewhere, and he claims he knows one of the managers at one of the internet providers who can get internet up and running same day. But if they leave like I think they will, then we are stuck with our dog who was going to go with them. He can't go to Malta, but my sister won't let him be re homed. We've looked at places in Manchester because the rent is reasonable and it's a decent location but it'd cost twice as much to move there because of the fees for everything. Months deposit, month in advance, agency fees, admin fees, reference fees, guarantor fees, reservation fees. I wouldn't mind living in Manchester, but it surely doesn't cost £200 per person to do a credit check. 

Now my family were going to drive me to the airport in two weeks for Vegas (mainly because I was going to pay for the hire car for a few days), but I refuse now because it wouldn't surprise me if the car had a "problem" 20 minutes before we had to leave now. So I'm catching the train up to arrive at 9pm the night before my 9am flight and I'm going to live in the airport like a tramp. I figure I can at least get into a lounge for a couple of hours from 4am.

I could get a hotel, but I'm not paying £130-£200 for one around the airport. AirBnb doesn't sit right with me. It feels too awkward staying in a total stranger's house. I wouldn't know what to do with myself. Do I just sit in my room? Am I allowed to move about the place? What if they make me watch telly with them and all they want to watch is property shows constantly reminding me of the shit I'm going to Vegas to get away from?

Down about £1.1k in poker in the past 3 weeks. Note to self - stop trying to bluff old ladies. They always have a flush. As certain as night turns into day and back again. They have the flush.

The prologue to the second Las Vegas diary starts with me sleeping on the floor of Manchester Airport.

The heat is on. Let's bring the rain.

This diary is really good reading.

Sorry the last update had to be about stressful times.

What date are you going Vegas again mate? Are you flying with Thomas Cook? If so, let me know how the on board entertainment/flight is please!

Prob best not to know. See your GP and ask for knock-out tablets.  /:-|

Marvellous!!!

I'm away on June 5th, so not long now.

I imagine the on board entertainment will be standard for economy flights to the USA. A couple of films you're slightly interested in, a bunch of single episodes of TV series' and you'll spend more time just looking at the map and seeing how far you've got to go.

I have a feeling you're going to be bouncing off the walls on that plane.

Not from turbulence I hope.... But yeah your right man!

Won the Dealer's Choice tournament in Genting Luton the other night.

Probably the last tournament I will ever play there, so it seems fitting to go out in a blaze of glory. Financially it wasn't a blaze - more of a smoldering ember like coals on a BBQ, but it's nice to put a full stop on the Luton part of the with a win.

Yeah it was listed as a 'beginners tournament', but I think there was one beginner there. Same Luton regulars with a shameless attitude with regards to value. If someone dropped a pound, we'd all claim it was ours.

---

The trick to dealer's choice is not to pick the game you're the best at, but to pick the game you think everyone else is the worst at. I'm almost always playing Super Lowball, because I find a lot of people are just far too happy to call a pot sized raise with any three cards under an 8. In a game where straights are bad, far too many (7-6)-4 starting hands about. Plus Super Lowball is the game to play when you need to YOLO some chips in the middle when you're short stacked. If you have a strong starting hand, it's not too uncommon to get a quadruple up from people who start (4-5)-3 who have to see 4th street.

6 Card Omaha is always fun when you have the best hand on the turn all in, but almost every card on the river loses the pot for you. Which is what happened one hand before break. I can't remember the 18 cards in play but we all had a combination of straight and flush draws and I lose.

Did manage a real 'get out of jail' situation at 1000/2000 when I had about 7bb and could pot all in in Super Lowball with (7-2)-A. Get two callers, and catch a J vs (x-x)A-4. One fold, and we catch perfect perfect perfect vs our unhappy opponent's straight, pair, picture.

Scoop a couple of big pots in Superstud and Omaha Hi Lo. Superstud we get it all in on 4th street with  (3d 4d) 6d  7d vs what looked like just a random low hand, and we catch  2d on 5th for a the lot.

Take a short stack out in 6PLO8 with  Aspades 2s 7c 7d 4c Qs and somehow a pair of 7s scoops.

Heads up with Terry in the end and we flipped for the league points. Truthfully I could have just given them to him as they're meaningless to me as I don't play there enough to qualify, but I wanted to be listed in first place on the little bit of paper they put up on the wall so it was a matter of pride really.

Championes, Championes, la la la la la la.

Could that be you on the FT of the Luton G monthly special?

If so, GLGL Harry!

The Vegas fund's looking better every day  :)up

It's not sadly. They still won't let me back in!

Save your GLGLs because in two weeks there will be much binkage.

Send me a pm if your looking to return to the G

Las Vegas - 2016 - Prologue

American Dream / American Nightmare

Start spreading the news. I'm leaving today. And I don't care for the most part. There's not an atom in my body that wants to get out of bed.

I love poker, I love Las Vegas and I love that in a short amount of time I will be at the World Series for a second year in a row. But I have this crippling flu that has had me in fever dreams for most of the morning. I spend the better half of the early hours eyes wide and drooling having visions of being on Wheel of Fortune. Of all things to hallucinate about, it's Micheal Barrymore. It's part of the reason I couldn't muster enough energy to get in the bath, lest he show up with a table leg and attempt to violate me with it. Yeah, this year's diary kicks off with references to a serious sexual assault.

TWO WORDS - COMMON PHRASE - 10 LETTERS

"Can I solve it?"

EARLY GRAVE

---

I'm typing this in a state of wobbly headed delirium. Partly to keep my mind off how utterly terrible I feel, and partly because I still haven't packed and I'm trying to put it off as much as possible. Each time I look at my empty suitcase, it seems to get smaller and smaller in a surreal Alice Through The Looking Glass way.

I booked a hotel in the end, because it was reduced to £100 and the thought of a night on the airport's doorstep with this virus attached to every node in my body would have left me in tears. If I'm going to suffer, I'm going to do it in modest comfort with the dulcet tones of the ITV Nightscreen to put me out for the night.

I'm confident I will at least feel a little better when I get up. I feel like this flu thing has peaked and it's on the way out. There's a cocktail of over the counter drugs on my table to help. Sudafed, Lemsip, Strepsils, Anadin, Covonia. All the hits. One happy little chemical family.

Anyway that's the moan out of the way.

---

I've booked this all backwards. For someone who works with flights and travel arrangements, you'd think I'd know what I was doing. I have to get the train from Milton Keynes this evening, change at Manchester Picadilly for the airport and arrive at midnight. Get 6 hours of hopefully Michael Barrymore-less sleep and then jet off to the neon jungle.

I have a bad feeling about this flight. I don't suffer boredom well. Last year my in flight entertainment thing wasn't working and I almost had a panic attack. Turns out they don't switch them on until they're in the air high enough. I can see Thomas Cook having the most dire selection of films to watch. Like the time I took a train from London to Cornwall, 6 hours and the only thing to watch on the headrest TV was episodes of Jamie Oliver doing some sort of Caribbean BBQ. I still have flashbacks about that turkey twizzler stealing twat.

---

My first plan as soon as I check in is to sleep for a hundred hours.

My mind is spent.
My body is broken.
Lead me to my throne.

You can only run better when you finally get to the city of lights.

Have a great trip

Superb posting, as always :D

Best of luck in Vegas!

There's always the luton dealers choice tourney tomorrow !!

How was the flight bro?! I'm flying out with Thomas Cook in 2days..... Any Jamie Oliver TV on flight?!

Credit where credit is due - the new economy seats are pretty comfortable.

No complementary drinks, prison food for your lunch and you get 2 films on the in flight entertainment unless you pay £4 for an upgrade. This week it's Captain Phillips (7/10, nice and suspenseful for the first hour, drops a bit in the second), and some romantic comedy with Adam Sandler (8/10, because I'd been awake for 28 hours when I watched it and I found it quite funny because I was so tired)

It's basically a 10 hour easyjet flight, it is what it is. Though if it's your first time In Vegas you won't care all that much and will just be counting down the minutes until you arrive.

42 degrees when I got off the plane yesterday. You're never prepared for that much heat.

Sounds alright to be fair! If you wanna meet up for a beer or two and a bite to eat out there, gimme a shout mate.

I guess you'll be here in 5 hours. That view over Greenland is something right?

Diary spoilers - I chopped the 6-Max event at the Grand Poker Series in Golden Nugget last night for a good few bags so beers are a sure thing.

Give me a shout when you can.

Oioi!!

Congrats on the pickup, and gl in the next one.

Congrats ransom.

Plenty of updates please.

Well done mate

Great news Ransom.

+ what Vinny says - more updates if you can find some time.