[Recently a man had to go to the hospital to have his wedding ring cut off from his penis after his mistress found the ring in his pants pocket and got so mad at him she stuck it on him while he was asleep. I don't know what's more embarrassing: 1. Having your mistress finding out you're married 2. Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your penis or:3. Finding out your penis fits through your wedding ring?]

Recently a man had to go to the hospital to have his wedding ring cut off from his penis after his mistress found the ring in his pants pocket and got so mad at him she stuck it on him while he was asleep.

I don't know what's more embarrassing:

1. Having your mistress finding out you're married
2. Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your penis or:
3. Finding out your penis fits through your wedding ring?


The swelling is gradually easing.......

Geo

Well done Flops and Tighty, extreme patience shown tonight.

Great job, thanks

Geo

still with ya guys - good work

Geo

It's a bum steer if you ask me!!

Geo

Unfortunately these type of atrocities are too common an occurence, especially in some of the poorest areas of the world.

it is only with the making of such great films, Hotel Rwanda, shooting dogs, The killing fields etc. does Joe public get any idea of the real butchery and savagery that happens between fellow humans.

I, unfortunately have seen this first hand, having formerly been an Infantryman. What has changed in the recent years is the media coverage of some of these conflicts, the last Iraq war (though technically a few of us would say the war is still ongoing) is a good example.

Joe public sat in their sitting rooms as the real horror of these campaigns was beamed live to their TV sets. This, IMHO, helped create the huge anit-war response within UK and USA simply because everyday Joe could see and be appalled by the destruction they were witnessing.

Prior to this you would only have the voices of the groups who had been campaigning against wars, nuclear weapons etc and Joe went about his business as usual with the usual daily news update (and that with only the info the governments wanted to release.)

It is only through the hard work of war correspondents and TV stations that the true reality of war has been brought to so many now, and long may it continue. the more that these images can be shown throughout the world, the more people will voice their opinions against wars and the more the governments will have to listen.

I believe we were just short of forcing Mr Blair from going to war in Iraq this time, however, going forward and with the increased ability for the media to be "on the spot" It will be harder for future PM's to cede to the powers of the USA and say,"No, my people think it's wrong, I think it's wrong and therefore I will not join you this time."

I know that there are other considerations that the PM has such as trade andkeeping he US on our side, however I do believe that the greater the media coverage, the more the public will speak out and force government's to re-think their strategies.

One thing I would always ask though, is that we support our troops whenever they are given these tasks. They are only following orders (and this does not condone those servicemen/women who stray outside the rules of conflict.) A lot of these guys and gals are as opposed to some of the things we get involved in and on occasion refuse to serve, at great cost to themselves and their families.

Recognise that a poker forum may not be the best place to post these views, however the more pressure we put on our "leaders" the better.


Geo.


 

“If language is not correct, then what is said is not what is meant;
if what is said is not what is meant, then what ought to be done remains undone.”
                                                                                                                                                                           Confucius

A great big thanks to Jen & Snoopy for outstanding work throughout  the last 3 days.

Much appreciated team.

Geo

..And this years gotcha!!! goes to kinboshi...

good one snoops

Geo

Incontinence Knickers!! just what you require:

As demonstrated by Billy Connolly.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c-t6_n6BR2U



Good luck

Geo

It is said he got the idea for cats eyes, whilst driving at night and the car headlights lit up the eyes of a cat .

Imagine if the cat was going in the same direction, he would have invented the pencil sharpener!!

Sorry, couldn't help myself

Geo

Great work team,

Being a new member I was totally engrossed throughout. Very impressed.

Appreciated

Geo.

Dundonian,

You are an absolute star!!!

Quote:

"It's very close to a village called Wank"..........................."I'll never forget coming across the place"

Apologies for any offence caused Blondites, but IMHO, this must be the NO.1 accidental pun ever (if it was accidental)

Would be obliged id someone can pass me details on how to copy quotes.

Ever so laughing my head off....

Geo

LOL,

 You did post correctly RED, it was the tank that confused us by saying 5-7

Thanks anyway.

Geo

'And in a darkened underpass I thought 'Oh God, my chance has come at last'

3 lines from same tune:

"And if a double decker bus, crashes into us, to die by your side is such a wonderful way to die"

"And if a ten ton truck, kills the both of us, to die by your side, well the pleasure, the privilege is mine"

Great choice of tune Nirvana

Geo

A stab in the dark - ol Homer Simpson?

Geo.



“If language is not correct, then what is said is not what is meant;
if what is said is not what is meant, then what ought to be done remains undone.”
                                                                                                                                                                           Confucius

So many great songs out there with such great Lyrics. Anyone got any great one -liners which stand out? One line that conjours up an immense picture in the mind.

Here are a few of my favourites:

Everybody needs a boosom for a pillow - Cornershop

I'm pushing an elephant up the stairs - REM

A cop knelt and kissed the feet of the priest and the gay threw up at the sight of that - Bowie (five years)

They smelt of pubs and wormwood scrubs and too many right wing meetings - Jam/Weller (down in the tube station) There are so many great lines in this one song that the whole story is great.

Wasn't sure if I should have started a new thread for this, but enjoyed this one so much thought I'd like to see it keep going.

Geo



“If language is not correct, then what is said is not what is meant;
if what is said is not what is meant, then what ought to be done remains undone.”
                                                                                                                                                                           Confucius