Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary

[TRIP5]

p.s. Is he actually called Bear??

nah, edward. teddy bear

LOL! Thanks Gatso...It would have been pretty unique to have been named Bear and then grow up to be a superstar mountaineer

I wish i'd have been named pokerstar superstar..I might have stood more of a chance, sigh.

xx

[RED-DOG]

14st 5¼lb

[boldie]

14st 5¼lb

Nice going ,sir.

[tikay]

Well done on the Diet Tom - you are on course to lose a Stone in about 3 weeks. Proper dieting, that.

You feeling better - mentally, physically?

Target weight decided yet, or just see how it goes?

 

[GreekStein]

Good stuff with the diet Tom - I'm useless in comparison. Lost like 2kg in 2 weeks.

[kinboshi]

Good stuff with the diet Tom - I'm useless in comparison. Lost like 2kg in 2 weeks.

Did you have a shave?

[GreekStein]

Good stuff with the diet Tom - I'm useless in comparison. Lost like 2kg in 2 weeks.

Did you have a shave?

Yeah, just not my back, shoulders arms or bottom of my feet and palms.

[the sicilian]

Good stuff with the diet Tom - I'm useless in comparison. Lost like 2kg in 2 weeks.

Picked nose imo

[GreekStein]

Good stuff with the diet Tom - I'm useless in comparison. Lost like 2kg in 2 weeks.

Picked nose imo

ROFL.

The nose jokes have been done to death but that one was incred. wp.

[RED-DOG]

Sorry I haven't replied to the questions, been a bit busy. I went to a funeral today, which meant we were "Sitting up" last night.

It's traditional for the womenfolk to sit indoors, and the men to sit outside around the fire. They always get to storytelling, and one particular tale stuck in my mind.

The police roll up at the home of a well known Gypsy man. "Hello Mr X. It is alleged that you racially abused the owner of the corner shop".

Mr X, not the sharpest tool in the box, replies, "You're kidding...  I would never do such a thing. I can't believe that Pakki bastard accused me......"

[RED-DOG]

Well perhaps you had to be there...

I hope no one found this offensive BTW.

[RED-DOG]

So I strolled into the reception area of the Limes Medical Centre and was immediately underwhelmed. It was a real smoke and mirrors type establishment with big adverts for Botox, wrinkle cream and hair growth products festooning the walls.

My "Consultant" was a a sort of cross between a doctor, a used car salesman, and a bunco-booth performer. 100 years ago, he would have been wearing a stove-pipe hat and selling snake oil.

He diagnosed my problem in about 15 seconds, a feat made all the more impressive by the fact that he did it without listening to my description of the symptoms, preferring instead to stare vacantly at the screen-saver in his monitor and mumble "Uh hu uh hu" in a way that really meant "Hurry up, I have to be at my tennis club in 20 minutes"

He said I had bursitis, (No, I had never heard of it either)

http://orthopedics.about.com/cs/sportsmedicine/a/blbursitis.htm


He told me a Cortisone injection would ease the pain....  He lied. It hasn't maid a whit of difference.

He also told me the Cortisone injection wouldn't hurt.... He lied again. It hurt like you wouldn't believe. I screamed blue murder. I offered to stick the needle in his arse so that he could review the evidence and re-consider his statement, but he declined my kind offer.

[Karabiner]

So I strolled into the reception area of the Limes Medical Centre and was immediately underwhelmed. It was a real smoke and mirrors type establishment with big adverts for Botox, wrinkle cream and hair growth products festooning the walls.

My "Consultant" was a a sort of cross between a doctor, a used car salesman, and a bunco-booth performer. 100 years ago, he would have been wearing a stove-pipe hat and selling snake oil.

He diagnosed my problem in about 15 seconds, a feat made all the more impressive by the fact that he did it without listening to my description of the symptoms, preferring instead to stare vacantly at the screen-saver in his monitor and mumble "Uh hu uh hu" in a way that really meant "Hurry up, I have to be at my tennis club in 20 minutes"

He said I had bursitis, (No, I had never heard of it either)

http://orthopedics.about.com/cs/sportsmedicine/a/blbursitis.htm


He told me a Cortisone injection would ease the pain....  He lied. It hasn't maid a whit of difference.

He also told me the Cortisone injection wouldn't hurt.... He lied again. It hurt like you wouldn't believe. I screamed blue murder. I offered to stick the needle in his arse so that he could review the evidence and re-consider his statement, but he declined my kind offer.

LOL

[RED-DOG]

Just saw a great question next door Tom, so I've nicked it!

why is it that if you blow in a dogs face it goes mad, yet when you take him on a car ride he sticks his head straight out the window?

Right. First of all, you're comparing apples and oranges. You wouldn't equate going out in the rain to someone spitting in your face would you? Of course not. So why would you compare a dog stitching his head out of a window to someone blowing in his face?.

We've already talked about the incredibly delicate membranes, and finely tuned scent organs that are housed in a dog's nose, well if you are going to put your face that close, he wants to use those finely tuned receptors to analyse the dozens, perhaps even hundreds of different aromas that you are giving off. He doesn't want you blasting that info at gale force, it's a bit like shouting down the doctors stethoscope.  

But that's only part of it. dogs are incredibly aware of body language, and when you stick your face right up close to his, he is already trying to work out what it means. Do you want him to do something? Do you want to play? He doesn't know, but it's exciting all the same.

After a few goes, he knows what's coming, and he's even more excited.

People think the dog absolutely hates having them blow in his face, but that's not really true. while he might not find it particularly pleasant, he probably interprets it as an attempt at some kind of game, (Which is quite astute really, because that's what it is)

Think about it, if he really hated it, why would he let you do it more than once? or when he gets used to the "Game" why would he react almost exactly the same when you blow in his direction even if he's 10 feet away and can't possibly feel it?

I think the effect it has on the dog equates to something like tickling in humans. If it's self inflicted, it doesn't work the same.

Hmmm... It still looks like drivel.

[RED-DOG]

Well done on the Diet Tom - you are on course to lose a Stone in about 3 weeks. Proper dieting, that.

You feeling better - mentally, physically?

Target weight decided yet, or just see how it goes?

 

I feel wonderful. I could bite a tiger.

I'm surprised that the diet is going so well. I think it's down to two basic reasons.

1: I was ready. I mean really ready. I was fed up with stuffing my face with crap whether I wanted it or not. I was sick of feeling bloated and listless.

1: Weighing myself every day and posting the result every day. It's a real motivation to do well. when I'm tempted to eat something I shouldn't, I think about my weigh in the next morning and how much I will hate to post a gain, whereas if I weigh once a week, I can eat and kid myself that I will have time to work it off before the next weigh in.

Initially, I want to get below 14st and then re-evaluate.

I think I will probably decide on around 13st 7lb and then try to work out a good maintenance diet.