Knock knock knock.
Me 'Hello, can I help you?'
Him (young spotty dressed in ill fitting suit) "Hello madam, I was just calling to make sure you have received your discount on your telephone bill, it should have been done last Tuesday for you"
Me "Should it?" my voice full of irony/sarcasm
Him (oblivious to sarcasm) "Yes it should, so you're saying it hasn't happened?"
Me "No it hasn't"
Him "Ah, we wondered if you had been missed out which is why I'm here."
Me "So you work for BT then do you?"
Him "No, I work for Talktalk"
Me "So how would you have been able to make my bills smaller if I haven't got a service with you?"
Him "That's what I'm calling for, your bills would have been smaller had you changed supplier" (nothing to say)
Me (on a roll) "So if you were giving me this discount last week you would have my name wouldn't you? So what is my name?"
Him " " " " " " (nothing to say)
Me (sensing fear) "So you don't know my name, you think I should have got a discount on my telephone service last week with a company I'm not registered with is that correct?"
Him (weakly) "Yes"
Me "And I haven't had this discount yet?"
Him "No"
Me "Right, so you have not fulfilled your promise so I want compensation, I should have got this reduction last week, you have called round and admitted it should have happened but I was missed out, my phone calls have been more expensive and your company hasn't delivered what it was supposed to do last week.Under trades description I am entitled to compensation and interest on the money I haven't saved"
Me (turning away from the door and shouting to non existent assistant) "Nikki, get me the number of the trades description peple in Northampton, this chap here says I've got a claim against his company, while you're at it get out the phone bills and see how much it is"
Him - not there any more, last seen scuttling down the path nearly tripping over his trousers which were too long for him...
Cold callers - gotta love them but had they called on an old person like TJ it may have been different....
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