Joke!!

[rex008]

For sad geeks only:

The barman said "We don't serve neutrinos here"
A neutrino walked into a bar


Well, I LOLd

[AndrewT]

Neutrino jokes are so last week.

Which is odd because they didn't start until next week.

[kinboshi]

I know a joke about time-travelling neutrinos...

[millidonk]

I know a joke about time-travelling neutrinos...

I don't know whats worse the fact i get it, the fact i laughed or the fact you bothered to put in this thread.

[zerofive]

A young blind girl is being tucked into bed by her mom. The mom says, "I've been saving up all my extra cash for some time now, to pay for this lotion to bring your sight back." Her mom applies the lotion to a wet cloth and covers her daughter's eyes with it. "Now go to sleep and come and see me in the morning," she says. The daughter replies, "okay mommy. Thank you," and goes to sleep. The next morning, she wakes up crying, "Mommy, mommy, that lotion didn't work! I'm still blind!" Her mom answered, "Haha! April Fools!"

[boldie]

What do we want?

Bigger placards.

When do we want them?

No

[Woodsey]

Research from the Mayo Clinic...

Did you know that in the human body there is a nerve
that connects the eyeball to the anus? It's called the
Anal Optic Nerve, and it is responsible for giving
people a shitty outlook on life.

If you don't believe it, pull a hair from your ass and
see if it doesn't bring a tear to your eyes.

[ManuelsMum]

.

[FUN4FRASER]

Two Male Monkeys in a zoo...One says to the other... " Im absolutely dieing for a shag"...the other replies " well dont look at me Im a heterosexual monkey and certainly not interested in any gay love...however I may just have a solution if youre interested ?"...."  the horny monkey now getting a bit desperate replies " yes please do"...." well you see that lion over there ?... he is a very sound sleeper so all you have to do is sneak up behind him , lift his tail ,do the deed and then sneak back here and the lion will be none the wiser "..."are you sure ?"... " Absolutely Ive done it myself a few times without a hitch "....So that night....the monkey tip toes up to the lions cage ,quietly opens the door with the lion snoring away..slowly he lifts the lions tails and starts going at it like a steam train.The monkey is having the time of his life until the Lion suddenly turns round and gives out a mighty roar .Like lightning the monkey is off and  running at 100 miles an hour through the zoo with the lion in hot pursuit. sweat is dripping as he can hear the lion getting nearer and nearer , so in sheer desperation he quickly sits on a bench picks up a copy of the local newspaper  and starts to read  it hoping the chasing lion will just run past .His heart is beating but is unable to see what is happening with his head buried deep in the broadsheet...And then he hears a voice..Its the Lion  "Excuse me mate .. Have you happened to see a monkey running past here ? " the monkey takes a deep gulp and replies shaking nervously " Would it be that monkey that shagged the Lion ?"...  The lion replies  "  Yes thats correct..... Jesus Its not in the papers already is it ? "

[geordieneil]

I got home very late last night from a poker evening with my mates. The wife was of course waiting up, ready to moan as usual.

"Stop!" I said. "Don't even bother getting pissed off. Pack your bags. I lost you in the poker game. You're moving in with Bob."

"How could you do such a terrible thing?" she whined.

"Wasn't easy," I said. "You don't normally fold with four aces."

[boldie]

What do you get if you mix Dulux colours Blue Jive and Yellow Groove together?

Cee Lo Green.

[MANTIS01]

A young couple are in the honeymoon suite after just getting married. The husband thinks it would be a good time to teach his new wife who's the boss in their relationship, so he takes off his trousers and throws them in her face saying "put them on". His wife somewhat surprised says "I can't get into your trousers honey". "Exactly" he says, "So just you remember who wears the trousers in this relationship". The wife thinks it's a good time for her own lesson so takes off her knickers and throws them in his face saying "put them on". The husband somewhat surprised says "I can't get into your knickers honey". "Exactly" she says "And that's how it stays until you learn who the boss is"

[gatso]

I don't get it. she can't get into his trousers so presumably she's fatter than him. but then he can't get in her knickers?

[celtic]

Is it mike Reid joke month?

Oh, and bolder, that was you worst effort by a long way.

[jakally]

Oh, and bolder, that was you worst effort by a long way.

Think that's a very unfair comment....................... if you go back through the thread there are at least 20 as bad as that one...