I posted this on the Internet poker board on the Hogmanay comps thread, but thought it was worth sharing
If you are prepared to have a proper gamble ... try this comp ...
£10 entry (to a pub which you have spent money in numerous times over the course of the year)
Level 1 .. You queue outside in the pissing down rain/freezing cold, while the Ape on the door looks you up and down as if you are made entirely of shit.
Level 2 .. You get shoehorned into a thronging mass of people who you have never seen before and get nudged/bumped/elbowed incessantly.
Level 3 .. You Join what you think is the queue for the bar, only to find out that you are in fact queuingfor the luxury of having a slash.
Level 4 .. You Finally get to the bar and order a few pints, then spill 90% of them on the quest to find somewhere with enough space to lift your arm high enough to get a swallow.
Level 5 .. (if you are still in) You finish your pint and find yourself humming along to "1999" by prince ... Even though you hate the weird purple ponce.
Level 6 .. You think F**k this for a game of soldiers, and walk out vowing never to go out on new years eve ever again.
Level 7 .. You have the irresistable urge to cause physical damage on the next pissed up tosser who wishes you a "Happy New Year" as you walk home ( cant get a fkin cab, its new years eve FFS)
FINALLLLLLLLL .. You get home at 11.30 ...Just in time to put the telly on and see what your license fee has provided you for new years eve... and low and behold .. 11.30 BBC1 New Year Live ...Natasia Kaplinsky(you know, the shaggable one from strictly come dancing) hosts an end of year party live from the heart of london...with performances by Jamelia (WHO ??) Sophie Ellis Bextor (Moon face) Connie Fisher (WHO ?) and the cast of sound of music (WHY ?)...but hold on this is just a big build up to the main event.. NICK KNOWLES counts down to the stunning fireworks display over the river thames to herald in 2007 !!!
Oh Good Lord .... Just KILL ME NOW !!!
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