blonde poker forum

I'm not sure if this is an acceptable thread topic on blonde so apologies in advance if it's not. This was a phone in topic I heard on my local radio station while I was driving home tonight and it did amuse me.

As soon as I heard it Russell Brand's name came to mind almost immediately, not entirely sure of why, there's no main reason just lots of little things adding up to one extremely irritating individual.

Would be interested in hearing everyone's answer on this one.   

edith bowman

Matt Dawson

SNAP

They must have been trawling blonde for radio station ideas ...

some great nominations here .. and most have stood the test of time ;)

http://blondepoker.com/forum/index.php?topic=7748.0

wonder what Mr F is up to?

Sara Cox

Indeed a good thread that I somehow missed. A quick point though. Gary Newbon can't be thumped as otherwise you would be taking on my whole family. Dad's second cousin.

Alan Green - Tosser - Why do they keep him?????
Victoria Derbyshire - Never had a positive word to say about anything.

Jeremy Vine and many, many others..but mainly him.

That ring announcer on cage rage. I fucking hate that little chav scrag.

This, also torch his rented suit, and pull his glass ear ring out.......

Jeremy Clarkson

Will Mellor
Robbie Williams
Kevin Costner

Because I think they are talentless and cocky pricks

Any footballer who is a multi milionaire, yet still manages to disgrace themselves by doing something childish, vile and chavish
Any famous person who moans about being rich and famous
Any famous person who carries on like they are the only person in the world who is a parent

Ulrika Johnson, shes a skank

The fat one from Horne and Corden, I dont hate him, I just want to smack him repeatadley while saying "you are not a talented comedy writer, all your jokes are just swearing, stick to acting the part of the fat mate in other peoples comedies'

Anyone who is barely famous, who goes on one of those shows where they slag off actual famous people.

Think thats it for now, Im off to get a copy of heat magazine to add to the list

Fuck me, I did that big list and missed off the one I would like to thump more than anything.

Arrogant wanker, has no place to insult all the people he does, hate him hate him hate him.

I dont mind the other two.

Oh and that 'Grimmy' guy from radio 1

and the bloke from the ronseal adverts, sarky twat

Didn't he co-devise/write Gavin and Stacey?

and my window cleaner, does he count?

Robbie Williams - what a great shout. Absolute cock! 2 punches pls.

I don't know if I'd like to punch Kerry Katona but I definitely like to slap her across the face with the back of my hand. I would punch her husband in a second thou.

I assume you are posting that as an argument against why I hate him?

Oh yeah, Andy Cole

nah, just thought the 'fat mate.....' bit at the end of your argument was referring to G&S.

ahaaaa I see. Yeah good point, I dont like G&S but dont hate it either. But he has been in loads of stuff as the token fat mate.l

Dont hate him anyway, seems a good bloke, just think his sketch show (and I presume that movie of his) was an insult to comedy.

Jenny McCarthy

Why?  http://www.jennymccarthybodycount.com/Jenny_McCarthy_Body_Count/Home.html and http://childrenofthenewearth.com/free.php?page=articles_free/mccarthy_jenny/article1

certainly harsh to slap him for not being a talented comedy writer when he co wrote one of the best comedies ever. by all means though slap him and tell him never to write another episode of that awful horne and corden prog

Jodie Marsh, and don't even get me started on those nasty tattoos she had acquired recently.........

Football: El Hadji Diouf

Music: Robbie Williams. Chris Brown, Miley Cyrus

Actors: Miley Cyrus

Politicians: 90%

Other: Pretty much anyone from Big Brother

Forgot about him, yep, whack him too

Shouldn't this thread be changed to which celebrity is most annoying? Does anybody actually genuinely want to punch anybody they have listed? Punching Jenny McCarthy because she has reacted in an irrational, foolish and harmful way to her child's disability is not the best idea. I know people will say it's only a bit of fun but is it really a good idea to have a load of men saying they want to punch women who they don't even know even if it is in jest?

Bad idea for a radio phone in, equally bad idea for a thread on blonde imo.

Id like to proper slug that Kelly Osborne as well now you reminded me

Yes

Jenny McCarthy needs a punch.  What she actively promotes actually kills children.

She needs to be made to see reason. (  ) A punch will obv achieve this.

lighten Up!

Are you Mad, im totally in love with her, there is defo something about it that makes me want to F*** her brains out!

Mine would need to be:

Football - Rio Ferdinand

Music - The wee Dick with the Hat from the band 'N-Dubz'

Celeb - Peir Morgan / Gordon Ramsey / Jordan / Jeremy Kyle

How did I forget Morgan and Kyle?

Edith Bowmen is lovely, very pretty, seems nice and she can sing a bit too.

michael jackson

jeremy kyle

gazza

james beatie

Nonsense, just imagine how good you would feel if you got a good swing at Cliff Richard ... then Michael Ball stepped in to protect him, and you got to smack him too.

You can't punch Michael Jackson because he passed away recently

You can.

Your mum can

Oh yes, spot on. Great shout.

[  ] She responds well to reason, evidence, science, rational thought and enquiry.

Maybe a punch will knock some sense into her?

Vinnie Jones.

She supports Rangers Dave, does that change your view? (although I suppose that means less brains to f*** out).

fern cotton, several times.

you are right of course.

I don't want to punch Jeremy Vine, really.






















I want him to die...really!

I lol'd

Steven Pienaar

donald trump

not really stars but all the people on young dumb and living off mum on bbc3

Any/all of the Friends cast...

des lynam

Yep, I nearly threw my TV out of the window after watching that

eamon holmes

lol Priceless Rod, Just Priceless.

David Icke.

Alan Carr

june brown tilts me hard

Paul o'Grady

Any of the loose women, especially Sherrie Hewson or Chris Evans' ex.

Joe Kinnear

Andy Townsend

Nicky Campbell

The One Show. Anyone on it

Esther Rantzen

Harriet Harman

John Bercow

Deborah Meehan, Dragons Den

Alan Titchmarsh

Mitch Benn

Lord Mandelson

Arlene Phillips

Duffy (the singer, not the Des)

Stuart Rose of M and S

Lord Sugar

The Fratellis, for the song "Chelsea Dagger"

 







I resisted long enough

 ;applause; ;applause; ;applause;

genuinely interested to know why so many blokes on here have such a dislike of the 'loose women'?

Person goes on Dragon's Den.....

'I would like to propose a guaranteed offer. If you give me £100,000 I'll return you £500,000 in the first year, £2,000,000 in the second year and £10,000,000 by the end of the third year'.

Deborah Meaden: 'Hmm, I'll take half'

That Sherree woman is stupid as fuck.

Chris Evans ex is a moaning old goat.

Kerry Katona is just a disgrace to humankind.

Cus they are silly whinging mooses, with stupid irritating opinions the majority of the time. I exempt Jackie Brambles from that statement.

nasty presenters. really bitter stuff

this superb article in the Grauniad sums it up



When Jodie Prenger appeared on Loose Women on Tuesday - having just won the BBC talent show I'd Do Anything - it felt less like watching a lap of honour around the media circuit and more like a premonition: it was just so easy to imagine her as a future panellist on the the ITV daytime show. As she chatted with the four regular presenters - who include a former soap star, a Nolan sister and Chris Evans' ex-wife - I wondered how Prenger's public image would shift if she was onscreen every day. If she was heard referring to her weight as often as the current panellist Carol McGiffin refers to her drinking and sex life, could her popularity withstand the pressure? Unlikely.

Loose Women is, in many ways, hateful. And that prompts a question. How can a lively, long-running programme with an all-female presenting roster get it so completely wrong? It is particularly disappointing when you consider the central conceit of the show, which is that it features a group of sassy, liberated female panellists, able to speak their minds on any subject from politics to celebrity to family life.

The schedule each day runs like this.

First, the panellists are generally introduced in a semi-insulting way; just think of some twisted terminology regarding female appearance, misbehaviour or the ravages of old age and it seems you could well be a writer for Loose Women. There follows a brief focus on a current news item, which commonly devolves into discussion of McGiffin's alcohol intake, Coleen Nolan's weight issues, or simply a barrage of tiresome sexual innuendo. Then comes a celebrity interview, in which the panellists attempt to cut against the usual tone and inject some gravity into the proceedings. However hard they try, unruliness tends to break through, and, once again, everything the panellists say sends the audience into peals of rapturous, inexplicable laughter.

Confused but still intrigued by what you have been missing? The first thing that will strike a first-time viewer of Loose Women is the objectification and/or denigration of any man who happens to drift into the panellists' orbit. The show has a cult following of ironic student viewers and gay guys, likely lured by the recognition that no man - from the most aesthetically pleasing pop star to the longest-suffering husband - can escape the scrutiny of the hormone-crazed panellists. I'll admit it: I have been lured by this too. There is something terrifying about the prospect of, say, former Coronation Street star Sherrie Hewson asking a member of a Christian boy band about relationships - but it also promises to be strangely compelling.

Male viewers embarrassed at the lechery on Loose Women could well complain that this is a case of feminism "going too far". There could never be an all-male equivalent to the show called Talking Balls, where a crew of laddish reality-TV rejects and failed boybanders leered at the female soap stars brought on to sate them. Not only would it obviously be sexist, but the idea would never be floated in the first place. The schedulers would naturally expect the core demographic for such a non-politically correct, hyper-masculine show to be at work by then.

If Loose Women tells us anything, it is that, as far as schedulers are concerned, daytime television is just for silly women.

But even if this is what they think, even if most cheaply made daytime television is aimed at those apparently "undiscerning" viewers - housewives, students and the unemployed - surely it would help to add a little substance to the downmarket glitz? You would think so, but the trajectory of Loose Women since it started in 1999 suggests that, when it comes to viewer approval, probably not. For the first seven years, the panel was anchored by the talismanic "voice of reason", journalist Kaye Adams, who did her best to keep the show's panellists on track. Since she left, replacement hosts Jackie Brambles and Andrea McLean have attempted to do the same, but have been fighting a losing battle. Despite this, the programme recently won its first major award, voted Best Daytime Show by viewers at the TV Quick and TV Choice awards. It's obviously doing something right.

For those of us who long for some content, there are occasional glimmers of hope.

Earlier this week, for instance, the panel interviewed Green Wing actor Michelle Gomez, who is doing promotion for her current starring role in the RSC's Taming of the Shrew. The show's usual mood was derailed as Gomez went off into an unexpected, somewhat feminist tangent about how the themes of the Shakespearean comedy reflect the misogyny in today's society. After that, the subject quickly turned to cosmetic procedures, but the interview offered a tantalising glimpse of what daytime television "for women" should be like.

In that regard, the US seems to do a little better - its ABC channel features the American predecessor to Loose Women, The View, which is anchored by the pioneering female broadcaster Barbara Walters. Although The View is often overshadowed by media coverage of its panellists (when the comedian and TV presenter Rosie O'Donnell was a regular, she was repeatedly criticised for her appearance, sexuality and conspiracy theories), it does at least have some formidable and very funny contributors. Last year, for instance, Oscar-winning actor Whoopi Goldberg joined the programme.

Essentially, it is the lack of genuinely interesting panellists that I find most offensive about Loose Women. The camaraderie among the panel can be endearing, and I respect all those involved for having succeeded in the worlds of media and showbusiness, which are typically tough, male-dominated arenas. Ideally, though, a show such as Loose Women should really live up to its promise by casting the most intelligent, funny and diverse female personalities around; instead it resorts to former soap stars and reality-show contestants sitting around discussing their worst habits - and those of their husbands. Do women really need to be patronised like this?

In case you missed them ... Four top moments from Loose Women

Russell Brand hangs around the studio like a bad smell

The four presenters talk about the etiquette of flatulence, including whether Carol McGiffin, who declares that she "quite likes doing it . . . the louder the better", would feel comfortable "pumping" in front of her "dream man", Russell Brand. As McGiffin weighs this up, to her huge surprise, Brand appears, and they proceed to discuss her earlier admission that she would pay him for sex. Later the host, former Corrie star Denise Welch, gives him an eyeful of her cleavage, he is grilled about his sex life, and is involved in a discussion of the "suede crotch" of McGiffin's jodhpurs. Excellent.

Puppy love

All the presenters get dressed up in their wedding finery to watch Charlie, a dog owned by presenter Sherrie Hewson, get married to a canine called Dolly. Yes, really. As if that wasn't bad enough, the dogs are dressed in wedding outfits and Torchwood star John Barrowman presides over the ceremony with countless bad puns (the nuptials are termed, "puptials", for instance) . The long-suffering host, Kaye Adams, says "I can't believe we're doing this." Nor can we.

Drooling over Enrique Iglesias

Host Jackie Brambles sets the tone for an interview with the singer, introducing him with the observation, "Boy, could he be my hero baby." Another presenter tells Iglesias, "We don't want to ask you anything, we just want to look at you," and regular panellist Nolan says, "You look fabulous." He tells Nolan that she's "cute", at which point she cups her breasts and pushes them towards him. More flirtation follows, before Iglesias yelps "You're embarrassing me." The audience knows exactly how he feels.

What Katie did

As glamour model Katie Price comes on to be interviewed, Nolan admits that she has been worried. "I thought, 'I'm going to look flat-chested today,'" she says. "Yours actually look bigger than mine," says Price. "Exactly! I'm quite proud of myself," says Nolan, scooting her chair even closer to Price's. More breast talk ensues.

I've never watched Loose Women.  Am I missing much?

:dontask:

john barrowman and graham norton please gtf off my tv

Are they in the way of you trying to watch Countdown?

John Barrowman on Torchwood. OK, good acting. Decent character

John Barrowman doing his BBC Light Entertainment song and dance stuff. Bleeeeeeeeeeuuurgghhhhhhhhhh.

WTF are all these men doing watching enough of Loose Women to get tilted by them?

loooooool, me too - he's certainly no Buffer.

Jo Wiley for me, she pisses me off something rotten.

Jade Goody's mum. I'd like to pull that hand out of her pocket and use it to multiple slap her own face with it. Also Danny Dyer. That hardest football firms programme tilts me. All he does is pull up his collar, toke on a fag, & bounce from foot to foot tellin us it's about to kick off when clearly it isn't. I would prefer to bat him in the face rather than punch him thou.

such a great thread although first 3 pages are all about who Daveshoelace wants to give a good whack to, i think its just about anyone he has ever laid eyes on is in line for a punch...

Anyone on big brother, the auditions must say Wankers only need apply

Norman Chad from the WSOP and WSOPE how many times can you make the same wife joke ?  I gave up counting

David Cameron. - he is the left overs from whatever they made tony Blair from and it shows

Katie Price ( Jordan )

Kelvin McKenzie !!!!!   I'd kneel on his belly button and wallop him with a hammer for a fortnight if i could.

Almost everyone thats ever gone on to the apprentice

Jeremy Kyle and ALL of his guests, lock the doors to the studio and suck out all of the air imho

Wayne Rooney and his Ugly, useless, talentless sourfaced Girlfriend!

Tom Cruise

Gary Glitter

I dont get it.

You don't like many people do you - you will get punch drunk fter that lot!



  :dontask:

Most men don't like it because the ladies on Loose Women speak the truth on what they think and feel.  I doubt if many men actually watch the programme!

It is meant to be a light hearted programme, and much better than a lot of rubbish on the telly!

Danny Dyer was a good shout from someone - incredibly irritating and un hard

Antonio Esfandiari needs a little punch on the arm imo

Andy Gray - I don't think I could tire of giving him repeated little cuffs everytime he spoke


Oh, and Jonathon Ross - a severe slap to the back of his legs

1 punch for Miley Cirus and another punch for hanna montanna. Lol!

bob crow

Contradiction?

It may be meant to be a light hearted programme, however it is not. It's merely a tool for these women to spout there feminist bile. Do you think a "Loose men" equivalent would ever reach the screen with a group of men spouting their chauvinistic bile?

Geo

Agree with your views on Kerry Katona but she is not on Loose Women

because it's a steaming pile of crap hosted by bitter, frustrated, crap women talking crap about crap that no-one gives a crap about

matthew wright gets a punch for much the same reason and then another one for his smug face

While were on the subject Jeremy Kyle as well.

This, I dont actually mind the fella, but he has one smackable face

I ment Daveshoelace

Bono 1000000x

Six pages and not a single mention of Davina McCall. Surely a shambles.

Willie Carson and Hazel Blears, both irritating and smaller than me.

Jeremy Kyle
Mariah Carey
Jodie Marsh
Woody Allen
That guy in me myself and Irene, the typecast actor, same stupid faces in every film, grrrrrrrr
Carol Vorderman
The man married to Judy Finnegan
Tom Cruise
Bea from BB

Billy, good shout with Kelvin McKenzie.  Not so much of a celeb, he's more of a piece of shit.

Could you not even bring yourself to say his 1st name, +1 on him btw

What is it about Madeley and Carrey that makes you loath saying their name? Compared to the others that is

lol, nothing, I just didn't know them and couldn't be arsed to google it.  I have the worst memory for names .... I go through a list before i get to the right one, I end up calling everyone hun, chick, petal, mate, or fella ......

Will have to google now to get these fellas first names or it'll bug me

Am i thinking of the wrong person in Judy finnigan,as in Richard & Judy ??? I'm confused

ty ty   Richard, that's the fella.      Yep, you got the right one

Woody Allen ??

Why ?

The personal side of him - brings up my hackles - might just be unfounded allegations but everytime i look at him I think fecking twisted pervert

lol quite hard

How did I forget Jeremy Kyle, such an obvious choice. Danny Dyer is a decent shout too.

From the sporting world Joey Barton and Craig Bellamy would be well up there too.

How can it just be allegations aren't they openly in a relationship,now

I don't want to punch anyone. considering pretending I do just so I can join in ;D

Namma Mouskouri?

I don't mean the adopted daughter that he is with now, tbh I had forgotten about that one.  There were also allegations about a different daughter who was only 7 or 8 at the time (will go and google in a min).  I just remember at the time the case eventually was dropped but the judge made some comments about Allen's behaviour being inappropriate.

 rotflmfao rotflmfao rotflmfao


I spurt my tea out when I read that - proper LOL'd

lol - but no :)

bono geldof kyle lederer   face of a team  raf benitez  j street porter  grier 

Jo fkn Wiley.

Fk off with your changing tracks pish

Alan Carr

cant last very long before i cringe and have to switch over

Danny Dyer is a total Legend!

Was sitting two rows behind him when he was in the celtic end at Ibrox three years ago, Legend!

One of the things on my wish list is to go to an old firm match.

I must get around to it.

Plan one for this season (in the celtic end as you'll want to celebrate a Victory), and we'll get you a ticket!

I think you have this thread mixed up with the Fittest women on TV thread!

Why on earth would anyone want to punch her!!!!!!!

I did Dave and for such a huge error I nominate myself to be punched by a giant hand representing man.

She was actually in my gym last night and is absolutely incredible but seeing as this is a thread about punching I won't sidetrack it any further and I won't make any jokes about her and fists.

lol new thread?   "girls who are really sexy but you wanna punch in the face because they got you banned from the gym for indecent behaviour"

But why does he have to bops down the street like he's got a ferret down his trousers? His ott cockney mannerisms are ridic. And why does he think he's hard? What is that based on?

the films he's been in

Danny Dyer is a comedy legend, he is about as hard as a 4 year old girl. I am expecting Greekstein to be on "Britian's hardest men" anyday soon, Danny will be in the car shitting it about going to some gaff called DTD, which he has heard is proper naughty.

I am hard though, probably amongst the hardest privately educated Greeks I know.

Big Baz was quaking in his boots this weekend and I have Kev, Tikay and the Clown as proof!

;tightend;

Yes, I see what you mean...


(http://www.thehollywoodnews.com/artman2/uploads/1/DannyDyer.jpg)

2 hands needed ... that's impressive in my book ;)

zane lowe

Oh My God, that is So you without the moustache!!!

OK forget Danny Dyer. What about Clive Anderson? I'm not sure I really want to punch him, but repeatedly hammering him on the head with that Mallett's Mallet would be fun, just to see if you could drive his ridic head any further into his shoulders. I would happily punch Timmy Mallet though.

 ;snoopy'sguns; Jan de Mol ;grr;

Anyone who has ever been on Big Brother, presented a Big Brother show, or thought about being on Big Brother
Danny Dyer defo a good shout
Lily Allen
Keith Allen
Nacho Novo
Chris Moyles and sidekicks
Most MPs
The lead singer from The Script

not a celeb but someone on tv I would like to punch before anyone else on this thread

the 'comedian' who tells 'jokes' about google or  myspace photos or weather reports having wind directions in them before channel 4 programmes sponsored by 3

While I have no desire to punch Clive Anderson I would like to slap him repeatedly in a similar fashion to what the little bald guy on Benny Hill used to get.

I thought he's quite funny

you can stop with the pointless one liners now you've reached 300 posts

lol gl

Shannon Elizabeth - cos she owes me 30k!

ricky ponting

Really ? She used to run around the primary school playground with us and then became a Fergie/Aberdeen fan as they stayed at The Craws Nest when Aberdeen had been to Hampden.

Sandy

Jeremy Clarkson
Jeremy Kyle
Jeremy (forgotten his surname at moment but the long nosed miserable bloke who does University Challenge)


It must be the name Jeremy!


There was another thread like this before and think I put this in there!

How do you feel about Ron Jeremy?

Paxman:

(http://blog.productionwizard.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/conservativehomeblogscomjpeg.jpeg)


Pure Twat, he interviews people and totally insults them than adds "Now, this is not necessarily my opinion" at the end of the sentence to get away with it.

I love Paxman..Excellent interviewer.

My problem is with Paxman wannabees, who think they have to keep grilling no matter what someone says.

lol never heard of him so looked up on google and recognised the face, not from his films but remember seeing a documentary about him and his (interesting) life!

He definately has a bit of Jeremy in him though even if it isn't his real name.

again not celebs but peeps on my tv.

the birds on the natwest saturday opening ads who pretend that they're really happy and excited now that they get to work weekends as well

yeah, ok. I bet that was the reaction of all natwest staff when they were told they too no longer had to have the whole weekend off. parties all over the place

LOL - those adverts are tilt-inducing.

FYP  ;whistle;

Guy died over the weekend. RIP.

how did he die?

heart problems

Note to self; Be nicer to Cos.

lol Boldie

My dislike of Matt Dawson just got too much for me and I became a hermit for three years to deal with it.

Still dislike him though.

level?