blonde poker forum

Myself and Gavin (pIzzled) have decided to attack fortress USA on a different front...

Turning our degeneracy east from Vegas we zero in on Tunica Tennesea deep in America's south.

The gold strike has a festival on with a mix of tourneys that include a 6 max and a Omaha . Add to this some random tourist things that should include a visit to Gracelands.. Not a huge Elvis fan but it's a minor tick box and an NBA game at local team Memphis grizzlies.

As I speak we are in Boston awaiting our connecting flight .  So far gav has only managed to block one airline toilet..we hope to increase the score before touchdown in Memphis... I have managed to score two separate security pull ups...my inability to get through airport security is legendary...

In Memphis we have ordered a dodge charger for true Luke and Bo japes but have a deep seated feeling we may get the alternative vehicle... Prob a smart car knowing our luck..stay posted for tales of poker, dice, roulette and trying to shout ' hey buddy ! ' in a loud American voice captured on video at selected points of the trip

Awesome title, Gl.

Good chance no more than 2 of 3 the titled items return...

Was hoping you two would do this.....I want lots of CRAPS stories, minimal Pai Gow and next to no poker

GL Gents..

Have a ball.

ROFL


Pocorn in hand waiting!!

subscribed

GL finding Tunica in Tennessee!!?

could be an epic trip report

Yup, looking forward to this nonsense. Will read tales of Tunica (Mississippi) until such time as you refer to your hire car as 'General Lee' or 'The General'.

Regards to Cletus and that old fella what missed all my awesome speech play coz he was deaf in his left ear.

Ok despite my best efforts with renaming American states we landed in Memphis...as expected hire car had morphed from Dodge Charger into some square abomination that was called something beginning with P...all I heard was square box piece of Shyte in an off colour gold...

Obv offered upgrade to mustang convertible...sold !...... Lol epic journey from Memphis to Tunica..luckily nearly all interstate... Verdict on mustang pride and joy of the Americagn car industry..... Sigh...terrible..think it has something like a 6 litre v8.... No wonder the roads are so wide over here..floor it and it needs all 3 lanes as it roars doesn't go anywhere and slews across the road like a slaloming drunk... Handles like Celtic with wheels on..all wobbly and floaty...

Looks ok for a yank motor I suppose... Pics to follow...

Staying at the gold strike...looks like a Vegas casino..nice and plush and plenty of floor space...still a few notches under Vegas finest but more than acceptable..checked in shower..food...and degenerate time ...wiiiiiiiiii!!!!!!!!

hahaha  brilliant stuff cannot wait for more!

Handles like Celtic with wheels on..all wobbly and floaty...

awesome, gl lads!

loving it already. This should make my commutes to work a little more bearable. Oh and if you will insist on keeping your guns stuffed up your skinny fit then im not suprised you keep getting pulled up by security lol

Loving it.

Think this is very farst going to become a must read (if dean or gav can rember to keep posting). Gl out there boys may the tables be nice to you and the tight fitting tops be very flashy

What's the time difference..... - 6 hrs ish? I expect the boys to be up at c6pm UK time with tales of Gav manaiging to fade the 7 at craps for 42 mins and a HUGE morale boosting up swing, while Dean has knocked it in at Pai Gow

OK where were we..oh yeah... degen time...

well it had been a long day so we only had 3 hours degenning... blackjack was first .... i like BJack and can play the basics OK
but i generally run like death at it..and this was no different... even the ever run good Gav got roasted as the dealer pulled up no less than 4 Black Jacks from the same shoe.. we switched to craps and fared a little better and run 100 to 400 each which then got mulled on the double zero wheel...some study needs to take place as the numbers are in different places to the euro wheel and we have a specific part of the wheel we bet..and you thought we didn't know what we are doing....

So first full day..skipped the midday 200 holdem in favour of the 100 one rb 1 addon plo omaha.... Gav loves omaha and is more than compatent at it so he was looking forward to it..as was i.

As expected it was mainly fish playing omaha like  holdem and we both dodged some bullets..i got felted mid way through with aces v kings where he held a 7 and a 2 os kickers... obv 10 7 2 rbow flop ..i had a pot bet left and got the bad news quickly

Gav went last 2 tables and his suited AA fell to A 567..wp sir...

played the evening comp50 runners went out about 15th..QQ v AK aipf..standard K on flop and a table bang from Wung Hung Low the Vietnamese refugee who had to say 'all in ' 4 times before the dealer understood him.. standard was beyond woeful with a limp fold from 5 bb the highlight....

So £360 6 max tmmr..looking forward to that as the majority of the fields so far look like retired farmers in dungarees and baseball caps called Cletus...

Obv back to the tables and Craps was our weapon of choice and we soon had a few good shooters and $100 became $800 with some mild pressing....

Gav decided to spread the love to Bjack and magic wheel whilst i stayed with the craps... Mr Galloway had advised that pressing at craps was the way forward..so thats what i decided to do..was a bit see saw for a while and soon +800 was -1000...i got stubborn and dug my heels in..just me and an old guy the other end of the tub remained..we both had been shooting well and i decided to press hard..he shot a 9 point and i had $96 on the 6 & 8 each and $40 on the 10& 5 each..he started to roll good and i pressed the roll hard..watching gav go a little white as i ordered the dealer to keep pressing as the numbers rolled in winding up at one point with $800 on the 8 $400 on the 6 $200 on the 10 & 5... the old dude rolled like a hero..i offered to adopt him as he spun me to $4500 and craps heaven...by the time he rolled out i estimated i had 2 grand on the table LOL..if he'd rolled for 10 more minutes i might be buying a new house.....

So a good start and will only encourage us to further the deggening to new levels of heroness and Busto city....

Seeing as we are in sort of cowboy country me and the Gavidar have agreed if enough of you shout it we will get some big stetson hats to wear at the tables...yeeeee ha !!!..shout it and pics will follow...oh must check the car park some time and make sure the cars still there....

so much love for that!

Keep the spin going!

Top roll by the old boy - good start

The 6 and the 8 pay out 7:6 (so bets of $800 are cumbersome, as well as costing you a smidge of round-down)

Once your bets are $60+ on them, you shouldn't really be using singles for $96... $90 pays $105, if it hits, go to $120 or $150 or $180... (i.e. multiples of $30 are easy [your 6 red chips pays 7 red chips]) by time you get to $600, you can jump to $750 or $900 or something.

OR... just ask the dealer to press "about half your winnings" or whatever and leave it to him....  Once he realises how you play and that you aren't going to complain, you just want action, he can pretty much save you having to work any of it out.

Now get back in there and have a proper bet...

Are these odds bets Simon? Do you need an unlimited odds table to get to these amounts?

I think I need to stay away from you this summer Simon or it could cause me problems :D

Not sure if I understand the question Stuart.  These are "placed bets" see pic below

(https://encrypted-tbn3.google.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRPS_FsExbfoBBbJBy9MQwnW0RL6d6i1dO-HaW2YOmI88jEkRk)

Bets placed here are paid at various odds.  The 5 and the 9 are easiest, they pay 7:5 so as long as you bet in $5 multiples your payout will always be in $7 multiples.  So if you bet $40, you have bet 8  x $5 and your payout will be 8 x $7

The 4 and the 10 are next easiest.  Simple in that you can again bet in multiples of $5 and not go wrong.  More complicated in that the odds change slightly around the globe, and in some places they allow you to "buy" the number for a 5% tax (vegas they then pay 2:1 on the bet and tax you 5% of the bet, atlantic city its the same odds but they make you pay tax at the time of placing, so further variation..)

The 6 and the 8 and universally paid out 7:6 (true odds should be 6:5)  But people get in the most amount of mess with this as they have no idea how much to bet, and if it hits, not idea what it pays, or how much to press to.

Your bets should be in multiples of $6 so that the dealer can pay out in multiples of $7.  Say you decide to bet $18.  You have bet 3 x $6 and the bet will pay out 3 x $7.  So you will have an $18 bet and $21 winnings. 

You could press that to $24 (dealer would increase your bet and give you $15 change)
Or you could press it to $30 (dealer would increase your bet to $30 and give you $9 change, for speed if you throw $1 in whilst asking for the press, dealer gives you $10, but maybe thats week 2..)

As to what the dealer will do for you as an automaton, depends largely on the attitude of the dealer and/or how well you tip and/or how drunken and abnoxious you are being (think L'il dave fell foul of this one :D)

In short, the dealer will very quickly understand your (lack of ) familiarity based on your speed and accuracy of instruction, ability to co-operate with helpful amounts of change etc)  Once he knows that you are a good guy, tipping him ok, not going to try and pull a stroke by claiming he pressed too much for you etc, he will pretty much just play for you, pressing amounts similar to what you have previously been looking to do.  When you see a guy playing solo that knows what he is doing, it looks good as a crazy amount of bets can take place without a single word being uttered, just by everyone being on the same wavelength.

So what the hell am I doing when I bet the come line then when it gets moved on to the numbers I bet behind it!?!

Think of the come bet as a "game within a game"

e.g. the shooter has a point of 10.  You place a come bet.  At that time, the come bet is like starting  anew game.  It wins on a 7 or 11, loses on a 2,3,12.  Any other number becomes the point for that particular come bet.

e.g. the shooter rolls an 8.  The dealer moves your come bet to the 8 box.  But he doesn't place it around the edge (placed bets paying 7:6) he places it in the centre of the box so that he knows it is a come bet and it will pay even money.  However, now you have the opportunity to take further odds (the 3x4x5x signs you see) and for the 8, you can have up to 5x odds.  This is exactly the same as taking odds behind the pass line, and is paid @ 6:5 (i.e. true odds) the dealer will take your odds bet and place it on top of your original come bet, but offset it, so he can see how much to pay @ Evs and how much to pay @ 6/5.

This now leaves the come are empty so you can place another come bet if you  want..  rinse and repeat.  You can end up with several bets with odds on several numbers.  The dealer has them in the corresponding box in fron t of him tho, if all those bets were all left in the come area, he'd have no idea by this time what was what.

So what your trying to say is that rather than waste my time trying to fill up all the numbers after come bets and then betting on them I could just bet on all the numbers at the start, they remain on the numbers till a 7 comes just the same, and I can press up each number as it hits?

I feel like I have wasted my time at the craps table so far!

You can certainly do that :)

DTD need to get a dice table. There isn't one in Nottingham any more.

There would be some amazing scenes if they did, one time in time for UKIPT :)

No better way to do your bollocks than playing dice.

Wait until you know what you are doing. 

Then you can do your bollocks even more.

More fun not knowing  ;whistle;

Omg a dice table at DTD would be soooooo cool but then again a let it ride table would be good as well

God let it ride is absolutely awful.

A dice table anywhere would be amazing, but you need experienced dealers and due to a dearth of craps in the UK I doubt there is enough talent floating around Nottingham right now to be able to staff it acceptably

Yep..throw money at table, throw dice, wins lots, leave table

The Bat Mobile...

Gav  with his new friend Cletus....

OMG you are driving a right fanny magnet.

Sure will help us...anyway most of the spare fanny round here weighs more than me and Gav together...

 ;tightend; ;tightend;

FYP.

your best bets (in terms of edge)  are to bet the come and then place max odds behind after the point is made ( well apart from darkside bets which won't make you popular )

Have a great time guys, looking forward to more updates.

darkside won't make you unpopular in the States, haven't seen many that seem to notice or care (unlike other places where it definitely would)

The main difference is in terms of mindset.  Betting the don't all the time is like waiting for death... and then not being able to celebrate when it happens.  All the bets that you have laid can only lose one at a time (and when the 7 hits, all your bets win)

Betting with the shooter, far more drunken whooping an hollering can take place; and if you have the stones, what can be a small initial outlay can quickly be pressed up into substantial action, giving a decent rush and an outside shot at a proper payday.

agree, it's the camaradarie that make craps so betting darkside is no fun really

well unless you're an evil ****er ;)

So onto the 6 max...... Errrr... Fortunately for you all neither of us lasted more than 2 hours...So no tourney reort you lucky people. We woke up late after Deggening the night before and stumbled bleary eyed deep into level 1... Both played horribly and finished with a flourish by both being bad beated out for good measure.

We decided to go exploring so into the mustang mobile roof down on a beautiful day and off we went.... To..... Some other casinos...wiiiiiii !!!!

We embarked on an epic roulette crawl that took in 4 casinos... Scores on the doors..

3 ID checks

1 refusal of entry

1 pit boss pissed off

And 1 all you can eat Buffett for 12 quid ( where's vince and redog when you need them..we want value here people.


The  jobs worth not accepting our photo I D driving license and refusing to let us in...ffs mate I'm 43 and with the best will in the world I don't look under 21....

The roulette spin up was awesome... Get in the hole.. Hit a big number and press for the world..lol the locals were playing 30 dollars each total and all nearly feinted as our hero chinaman moved towers of chips into the Vincinity of 20 & 23... I backed up the main man to take in 45% of the wheel and we were on like donkey kong....when the smoke cleared we exited left with a couple of bags and the locals shaking their heads at those two crazy boys with the funny accents.

In ballys we spun down a bag before before mounting a 2nd front..not being a big casino their only wheel had a max of $25 on a number..the Pizz and I pool resources but have two different colours... As we hit pay dirt a call came down from upstairs and the boss accused us of playing together and we counldnt double up on our fave numbers... No prob we smiled and scooped their money and fucked off..lol good luck getting your money back budee...

Back in home base a quick freshen up in the room..money dump..reload.. And back into the fray for the boys.. More roulette and craps ftw..early doors was good Up about 800 each.... Usher in the epic press....we unloaded all the tub could eat pressed hard and ... 7 became the face number and  the press came unstuck and we ended the day after a solid 10 hours of degen still well up on the day...

Let the Pizz drive the car today...ffs he was like a kid..can I have a go now please oh go on....please..please...please...he didn't stop smiling for an hour..apart from the one time he forgot what side to drive on...asked a dealer what car was better..dodge charger or mustang ...mustang it was..so we got that bit right although I think we have managed to make the car less appealing some how....

Supposed to play the 500 tmmr but it may get a swerve..both a bit meh about poker at the moment and def not firing on all cylinders although that prob wouldn't make a difference... May do grace lands tmmr and some girlie shopping..still wanna Stetson especially for the Gav..a chinaman in a Stetson is almost worth paying to see.... I for see huge degen sessions on the horizon..man I wanna go play some craps...

You two remind me of thelma and Louise.

Gonna use my one time for the same ending.

lolz u may get ur wish if i let the chinaman drive anymore !

Why did I somehow immediately think of the car park scene....

Photo of Gavski in Stetson pls.
Good luck u fkn degens!
:)

Photo of Cletus spreading Gav on the bonnet pls

Sound like a HILARIOUS TRIP!

Good work on the craps! The secret to craps really is high morale, dice are very spiritual and can instantly detect negative energy, so it's imprtant you, and your "table-mates" are keeping positive morale HIGH!

I included some scientifically tested more-boosting measures in a blog post once, about half way down, defo try implementing these measures and I'm sure results will improve!

http://lildaveslife.blogspot.co.uk/2011/11/missing-in-action.html

Good Luck!

Enjoying the thread.

gl boys - get the lot.

this whilst in or driving the car. Make it a proper thelma moment lol

Are you really 43 Dean  ;hide;

Great little thread......keep it up til the end

Something funky going on with the link...and your blog in general.  When I click on either link (the one above and the one in your sig), a box pops up with this message...

Hero Degen Alert

Just woke up to discover the Gavidar was back in the casino at 6 am playing blackjack... ' I couldn't sleep '.  Sure Bud u keep telling yourself that lol....

Pass Pizzled the keyboard at some point? Ta

Really enjoying this, absolute must read.

:D

Swerved pokerz today and went over to gracelands . It's about 30miles from where we are staying and was ones of the boxes we aimed to tick on the trip . The sun was shining and the roof was down and we had a lovely drive over. Mississippi seems to consist of massive wide open spaces intersected by endless straight as an arrow roads.

As we drew into a more built up area co pilot Pizz spots a KFC .. Being the food connoisseur he is he insists we pull in.. No prob I could eat.  The sign on the door insisted that no guns should be brought into the store did t instil confidence and our jolly accents drew sceptical stares from the all African American clientele.. The fact they were mostly women didn't make us feel an safer. We ordered what we thought was a chicken burger but was actually a slice of cheese and bacon slapped between two chicken breasts... No bun no nothing just like that.. Lolz.. Obv it was lovely.

We managed to get out without being gunned down by Ma Baker and her boys and made it to Elvis land. Gracelands was good some nice exhibits and a good insight into the king. For a fan it would be nirvana.. I like elvis obv and I got quite a bit out of it so good all round .

Back at base now gonna play a satay and then we r moving onto prob dice ... Degen report here Soon

You had one of these.

(http://www.everymantri.com/.a/6a00d83451b18a69e20134856e6169970c-600wi)

It looked like there was bread in the photo, I should have worn my glasses

That's the one... I let gav order I was too busy watching our back for a quick drawing momma.

So Pizz played a ME satty ... We decided not to play in the same one as we wernt  sure how many seats it would produce. It fetched 3 and poor gav went out 10th to A 4 with AK on a J 7 4 flop.. Old dude called the lot off instantly..soul read chinaman was not happy.. I fared little better played a STT as they are pretty soft..genius limp called with Q d 10 H op...donk led a 3 diamond ace high brd into my AK ...I couldnt flat for 60% of my stack so shipped him in he got there on the river obv...

Played the evening comp..owned a yokel who tried to triple barrel a ridic bluff past me which made no sense... I talked to myself out loud the hand and he thought I was critiquing his play..Lol...

Then a straggler from the viet cong sat in the 10 seat and proceeded to tell everyone how brilliant he was..my fave line of his was ' if this was a ten thousand dollar event you wouldnt have a chance'.... Lol... He then showed off his mad skills by twice limp calling tug with shit op.. Then to a 300 limp from utg he raised to four and a half thousand..lol awesome... I wanted him bad but he got his arse handed to him overplaying 9 5 os........ Wp sir... Anyway I managed to get it in ahead twice and get run runnered both times flush first straight second time.... Sigh

Took the fuming puzzled for a lovely steak and on to more pressing matters at the craps table.... It was horrible..the dice were colder than a witches tit..so bad we had to go back to the room for a reload..gav abandoned me in favour of blackjack and was soon reporting success whilst I continued to run like death.

The 2nd not insubstantial clip was almost spent.. The dice could roll nothing but sevens...tears stained the felt..heads were hung in solemn defeat...it was all over...then we got stubborn dug in and began to roll and press..press and roll..Pizz rejoined the action and from the ashes we rose...barking orders to the dealers to press hard and often and their hands danced feverishly with chips aplenty.... The table super heated and we were even..then stepped forward an angel..a rookie who had refused to roll three times in a row...finally she picked up the dice urged on by the dealer...she timidly tossed the dice, barely reaching the back of the tub..she set her point and we halved our bets .... She rolled a number..we pressed some of the profit back..she rolled a point..set another rolled it again..rolled a loaded number...and again...we gave her an encouraging clap...closed our eyes and thought of the two most loaded numbers we had... Bang she bulls eyed them in turn... Time to hit and hit hard... She smiled sweetly as we vocally celebrated each number and point....a stream of fist pumps followed until the inevitable roll out.... She'd rolled us from Evans into double money in ten minutes..gawd bless beginners luck..

Another good shift ends...tomorrow we must try and play some poker.....or perhaps not...

Man, sounds so class. Video camera plz.

Won't let u video table action I'm afraid... If they did it would be epic

Wiiiiiiii- spangles on ft of 200$..... Gogogo my 10%...I'm gonna stick it all on black if he wins :)

OMG - he lasted 5 hrs in a comp and not got it in against a clown who played terribly and got there ;-)

Glgl - win it all and spin it up Gav - loving the diary

Good read guys good luck enjoy it it sounds great

Seriously awesome read!!

Love the degeneracy ITT, can't wait to go viva las vegassssssssssss, all I need now is to learn craps - glglglgl for rest of trip!

Im tired..so quick report...played the 150 runner $200  chopped it four ways for 5 grand each..played pretty well and saw some awesome hands..one in particular i will report later because its so unbelievable...

We spun Gavs 10% up + more on the craps ...and oooops dunno about gone in sixty seconds bit closer to five minutes...thats how you blow nearly a grand people and then walk away laughing..awesome...

4am and we are doing our football bets..$1000 main event in just 8 hours... sure making the start of that....

LOL..we need help 4.30am and i just had to virtually wake Gav up to tell me the name of Eso's horse so i can get a bet on wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

Sirius Degeneracy

Nice binkage sir. Knew you had a four-way chop with three Cletus's in you. How's it feel to get a US flag?

wiiiiiiiiiii wp wp gogogo 4 the rest of the trip!

great read gratz on the bink

wp fellas.

All u need is a couple of strip clubs

Afraid not too much to report on the degen front as we have finally got into poker mode. After yesterdays 14 hours I wasn't too keen on another long day..but we came for poker and it was the main event... We rolled in at level 2... Fantastic comp $1000 buyin  and structure 12k and an hour clock... 190 runners half of which were gone by the end of 100-200 25.... I kid you not..the yanks know how to spangle it off in style....

Some sort of tourney report may follow...suffice to say me and Pizz ended up on the same table which turned out to be the toughest in the tournament. Both playing well and grinder it out... Just bagged up for day two.. Pizz just above average me just below and have now been moved to different tables... 43 left 60 grand up top.. Would be nice if one or both of us could make it through...so one time us for more money and japes...

Glglglgl. Stories would take a whole new level of degenness if one of you does a bink.

Glgl Pizz

Please Win the Fucking Lot...

Last update on facebook looked promising....

So happy I found this thread... amazing degen behaviour. Top stuff.

A massive GL to both in the ME, keep us updated!

I went early had whizz kid next to me I made a move and he 5 bet shoved me lol.. Then ran 12 bb shove with A 8 in the co straight into kings.. Wanker even asked for a count sigh ... On bubble pizz in good shape one time for the boy he deserves it ... Oh and my 10 % wiiiiiii

Wiiiiii. Pizz in the money u go son !

Go, go, go Gav.

Just when you thought this trip couldnt get any more epic the Pizz man just chopped the Main event for over  30 grand !!!  see here 

 http://blondepoker.com/forum/index.php?topic=57302.0

its beena whirlwind 36 hours...will try to write it up tmmr but...oh my !

NICE, go on the pizzzzzzzz :)!!!

Great results lads

Stand by kids... We r locked and loaded... Shops first and then a tour of the casinos... Could get ugly real quickly :)

Ha, deffo Bob this thread.

pics pls

Roffle @ silence! How's the hangover?

Ok ..this gambling lark is hard work and haven't had much chance to write up...will prob do the poker bit when we get back..some of the bits are quite good... but c'mon you just wanna hear about spangling right?..ok you got it..

We were both bouncing a bit after Pizz won the money... i suppose to some its not huge huge..but as degen and mad as we are its still a big score... especially for Gav and will really help him in his daily life..and hand on heart i'm really pleased for the fella..his as nice a bloke as you could wish to meet and iv'e had some epic times with him already in Vegas..Prague and now Tunica.

We came down from the poker room and plotted up at the bar to have a drink and catch our breath.. it was 5 am and some action was still going on but we were pretty beat so we got past the craps table and roulette but fell at the fruities for a quick spin..well cmon we couldnt just go to bed... as a side note the woman by us won two and a half bags on a fruitie and then proceeded to play the same machine afterwards... i mean go figure..how stoopid you gotta be..ffs love it just paid out a lump its not gonna do it again..oh well...

we got up to the room and did the happy dance..Gav had a little roll around on the bed covered in his loot and we crashed.

Next morning we decided to go girlie shopping and then go on a casino crawl again..


On the Casino website it listed places to go..and said great shopping could be had at Peabody Place Mall in Memphis..ok lets go..got there and it was derilict..in fact this whole part of downtown Memphis was rundown and tbh didnt look that safe.

Across the road was a Hooters and seeing as we were peckish and that this chain of restaurents is reknowned for their food we decided to eat and ask one of the waitresses where the nearest mall was.

two dirty chicken burgers,buffalo wings and two dr peppers later we have learned of a mall not to far away.
The food wasn't great and the thing Gav had looked like throw up in a bun..however one of the perky blonde waitresses was an absolute stunner...i was thirty seconds away from offering her all my worldly goods when Gav hauled me back to the batmobile and shopping.

 Seeing as we hired a car i downloaded a cheap sat nav on my i phone and it has served us well and been declared bargain of the trip for £6.99l... however it had a bit of a mental on the way to the mall and we got lost in rush hour...fook it was a nightmare and for all their good ideas..Americans seem to have an aversion to signs..i mean lakeside is signed about 15 miles out ffs.

We finally found it and it was pretty crap...Gav was desperate to treat himself and his daughter to new ipad 3's and we found out there was an apple store in nearby GermanTown..yes thats what its called..so we got lost again and asked a woman for directions..now all she had to say was go across the lights and turn right..thats it..one fucking sentance..it took her five minutes whilst her brat screamed for attention..she just went on and on explaining the intricacies our journey would take..ffs love give it a rest... anyway it ended well and Gav finally managed to use his money on something other than degenning..and there will be one happy girl come thursday back in blighty....

So Girlie stuff over...let the action begin...

Cracking thread Dewi.

We got back on the road and headed for some of the other casino's as we had earlier in the week..We headed for a place called fitzgeralds..its themed like a little castle..and Irish I think..well its greeny looking so it must be..right?

we'd spun well there before so we ploughed straight onto the magic wheel which is the first thing you see as you enter the floor..lol they must have known we were coming and moved it last week..

anyway first number out is one of our key numbers..20 Black ..this is Gav's fave number.. mine is 23 ..as given to me by a Latvian waitress in Nottingham when pressed for a random number..well i gotta have a number haven't i ?

Now spinning one of the key numbers first out is not as good as it may seem..first we are not fully loaded on it as we are later in the spin..and secondly everytine this happens we do our nuts..

This didnt change....after getting a bit of a kicking Gaav decided blackjack would be his better option..and left me to marshal our shared troops..( we actually pool our money on roulette..but are solo on everything else. don't ask me why lol )

Anyway he could see me from the black jack table and he looked concerned as everytime he looked up I was waiving $100 notes at him as i changed them up...obv half the action is his and he now owes me this half as i proceed to knock it in double quick..a young guy with his girlfriend muttered 'hardcore ' under his breath as i covered 45% of the wheel for around 200 a spin and miss the bloody lot several times in a row...we spin a section of the wheel and this dealer decided it was allergic to it...Gav raped the blackjack for a lump and dashed back just before i emptied around a 1500 clip into the wheel...well i dont drink really and 2 quick corona's had got me bringing out the big guns....Gav helped me finish off the clip and made me go and play Bjack..we were gonna rip up there 3 dollar crap table but gunned in the full clip of 2 bags abd a bag of Gav's previous Bjack winnings...oooops..time to go back to base for a full reload and a little talking to....

Back at base we reloaded and went gunning for craps next door at the HorseShoe. Im not too keen on this casino..it feels unlucky as first night we got it handed to us...rinse repeat...almost another full clip was hosed in quick style as the dice were fixed to 7 for continuous roll outs.... we retreated to home casino turf...and fired at the craps there..slowly but surely we began to claw it back..Gav mooched off for more blackjack and i played on.

Then a black guy who had been in the middle of a good roll when i arrived took centre stage again..he rolled like a fricking hero...soon i had the 6 8 9 10 loaded up...and he just kept hitting..the dude rolled me even on the day.....redbulls sarted flowing and time passed..Gav came to see me periodcally and reported varying success...he was about 11 beers in and was lolling about..lol...drunk chinaman ftw....he finally had to surrender and went back to the room.

My hero had soon wisely departed with his stash leaving me and one other guy at the table...back and forth we went and then finally i got in the zone and things felt right..i chided the dice into cooperation and come 6.45 am i rolled out my final 7..stumbling back to the room a snoring chinaman and a pocketfull of cash to add to the ever bulging safe...phew...rollercoaster over..epic...

 ;topman;

Brilliant!!

Thanks Ralph, my best yet ;)

So we can safely say a winning trip and youre boarding the plane tomorrow?

Pleased for you both....always feel a bit guilty when you knock it in at craps ;)

Obv if you want to get rid of any $$$$ at spot I'll be at front of queue

Safe trip back boys

one more session to report no great damage and one farewell to come so hopefully not too much damage...

Anyone wanting dollars at spot let us know...obv brag..wiiiiiii

Proud to be able to call you two friends.

Great thread.

How much do you need?

Was it that obvious? ;)

Prob have to thank you Mr C... Have a great time on the dice and we r big boys.. We know the pitfalls and are always a mile inside roll.. So all good... Now if I could find the bastard who got me on roulette.. Oh wait his sitting  next to me .. Sigh at degen chinMan buddies...

One more degen to relate as Sicilian gets loud and goes up against Head of casino security... Can u pick a winner ? Results later...

Hi Guys,

looking for some $$$ if you have any available?

Great read btw. Really enjoyed it.

Many Thanks

Cotter.

Just awesome reading, thank you

Great great great read.

Nice one!

Hi guys,

Brill read, i did 2 weeks there a couple of years ago, took my MIL for the whole Elvis thing for her 70th, ( long story).  It really is a cool place and your tales gave some lovely flashbacks to my visiit.

Cheers


Steve

OK....

So the last night we had booked to see the Memphis Grizzilies NBA basketball team at the superb Fedex Forum Arena... a fantastic Cauldron of multi entertainment. I have got quite into NBA the last 6 months..betting a fair amount..which is a leak at the moment but getting better..lolz..NBA is a fickle mistress and no result is ever guarenteed.

Iv'e also managed to get the Pizz interested so we were both looking forward to something non casino based.

We were not disappointed as the Americans know how to put on a show..the game was a good close one against Golden State and with the home team behind in the 4th Quarter the giant Hexagon shaped tv screens suspended over the court began showing scenes from Gladiator, 300 and Braveheart to gee up the team..the Arena went crazy..

The Americans are total mentalists and were on their feet screaming..The Sound System is something out of a Clubbers dream and was booming out Bass driven beats everytime the home team had the ball  WOW! what an atmosphere !

Also at every time out ( theres between 10 & 12 a game in BasketBall ) there was a little show or competition..it was awesome as a myriad of people scampered across the court to enable whatever was happening to occur in the short time frame...they ranged from

Cheerleaders ( OBV ) here just for you..

YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=18MI0AQefPY

and things like the flying Elvis's...loved this

YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6spweP0YPIo

Funniest one was the Brain freeze contest where two big americans tried to drink the most Giant Slushy in a minute..Hilarious as they encountered the much vaunted Brain Freeze..LOL only in America

YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DE-7qaGiD_I


So BasketBall done it was straight back to base for more degenning.... A see-saw session ended at 4AM in a small profit. We were now veteran Crapsters throwing in the change for the dealer on a winning bet before even asked..we were now on $200 starting roll on a crapless table where any number can be point..its awesome as we pressed every roll ... swings can be brutal but so can the profits..its the only way to play dice..full press the first hit then semi press thereafter..press hard the 6 & 8..often having $2-400 on those numbers alone wiiiiiiiii...... LOL one time a large Black Lady who I think was also a dealer was playing at the table and there was a big roll in progress..I had the 8 pressed to 180 and it rolled in ...i didnt press and scooped the money..she turned her head slowly and gave me a stare that could wither heroes hearts..210..i said meekly... and she nodded and smiled as the dealer pressed the 8 up to 210...lolz ...obv no room for feint heart at craps Baby !..

So the final morning dawned all was good..we rushed to get checked out..obv Pizz and his suitcase for half a man was packed and ready to go the night before whilst the Sicilians coffin sized baggage was but half done and there was bit of melee as housekeeping knocked 3 times to see if we were checking out....

Got downstairs checked in the bags so they were safe so we could have lunch and one last session...

Now as reported earlier we had got id checked in a previous hotel and got turned away and Pizz kept getting ID checked so he carried his passport all the time. He has offered me his Oil of Ulay but so far I have declined.

As we strolled towards the floor the lady security stopped us and asked Pizz for ID.. I laughingly said 'I suppose you want to see mine too ?'...'

'yes please'

I looked at her in disbelief..seriously I must have walked past this same woman a dozen times during the week and not once had she asked for ID.  Personally I find it insulting to be asked for ID..I mean i'm 43 years old FFS and if you think i look under 21 you need your eyes checked... so the short conversation went like this..

'You asking me for ID because you think I look under 21?'

'Yes sir'

'Your joking right?'

With that she goes for her lapel mike...

'central we have a refusal on an ID check'

Next thing I know this huge Black dude come waltzing up..lol he must have been 6'7 and about 25 stone..sigh ffs..but undettered we go for it..

'Are you saying I have to proove i'm over 21?'

'No sir over 35'

'What!!.. you just made that up..show me where thats written down'

'I don't have to, I just said it'

LOL at this point i realise im on a loser and leave muttering quietly GTFO..just loud enough so he cant hear..lol

We amble next door to the Horseshoe..different casino, different company.. I take 6 steps onto the floor and im stopped by security asking for ID...LOL lesson learnt..don't fuck with Casino security.
So back to my luggage I have to go and get my passport...sigh.

We have dinner and a last session..Its obvious we have had enough..Pizz spins a 23 for 2 bags and barely raises a smile..im throwing dice not caring whether they hit a 7 or 103...its time for home...

We fill up the Mustang..16 Gallons..cost about 35 Quid..unreal..this countrys government should be ashamed of themselves the amount they rape us for in petrol taxes...

We connect at Atlanta and get delayed for 2 hours but finally touch down at Heathrow 2PM...richer by far and a curtain to one of our most epic trips ever...Viva Las Tunica I say !!!!

Get the next one booked pls, need more !

Next stop Vegas.

So funny, sigh at me not being there for it.

This is a MUST for BoB please.....

Incred trip report and roll on the summerrrrrrrrr!!

Seconded!

Brilliant thread.

Readable. At a push.