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GlasgowBandit
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« Reply #15 on: December 12, 2007, 10:13:16 PM » |
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Celtic apologise for qualification
Over the last few days, many Rangers supporters have kindly pointed out that Celtic's qualification for the last 16 is not in fact valid because a number of fundamental football principles were ignored. Among these infractions, the most serious ones were: -
1. SOME OF CELTIC'S OPPONENTS MADE DEFENSIVE MISTAKES OR GOALKEEPING ERRORS WHICH CELTIC EXPLOITED TO SCORE GOALS.
Celtic FC now accepts that it is unsporting to apply pressure on their opponents in the hope of capitalising on mistakes at some point in the course of a 90-minute match. The club had previously regarded this as a valid approach to creating scoring opportunities. Celtic FC apologises for this tactic and will never again try to benefit from their opponents' inability to handle this pressure.
2. CELTIC'S HAUL OF NINE POINTS FROM THREE MATCHES IS NULL AND VOID BECAUSE ALL THE POINTS WERE SECURED FROM HOME WINS.
Celtic FC had previously been unaware of this rule and begs forgiveness for only recently discovering that seven points is better than nine if some of the seven points were won away from home. Celtic FC regrets this oversight.
3. LATE GOALS DO NOT COUNT.
Celtic FC is at fault for believing that a goal scored towards the end of the game is worth the same as a goal scored at any other time. Had the club realised this, there would have been no need to feel any dismay after conceding a late goal to Benfica in Lisbon and Celtic FC now apologise for an inappropriate reaction to what has turned out to be a 0-0 draw.
4. GOALS DO NOT COUNT IF THE BALL IS DEFLECTED INTO THE NET.
It can now be admitted that some of the club's employees are in the habit of shooting towards goal before the opposing defenders have had a chance to get out of the way and this unsporting practice can make it difficult for the goalkeeper to read the flight of the ball. This is a reprehensible tactic and Celtic FC undertakes to forbid its application forthwith. Henceforth, no Celtic player will be allowed to direct the ball goalwards if there is any danger of a goal resulting from a deflection.
5. CELTIC HAD SOME LUCKY BREAKS IN QUALIFYING.
Admittedly, Celtic were very fortunate that Shaktar didn't take more advantage of their special dispensation to be allowed to control the ball with their hands, as Brandao did when he opened the scoring for Shaktar at Celtic Park. It was also fortuitous that AC Milan weren't awarded a soft penalty more than once when their forwards fell down dramatically in the penalty area. Luckier still was the fact that rival teams were not skillful enough to score more goals in the face of determined defending and goalkeeping by the Celtic players.
Celtic FC can only apologise to the faithful supporters of Rangers for the anguish and disappointment that they have endured in the wake of these violations of the Spirit of the Game.
Celtic FC hopes that this apology will save them from the tedium of mindlessly repeating the same posts on every thread, day after day.
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brad.strider
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« Reply #16 on: December 12, 2007, 10:16:54 PM » |
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more dignity, brilliant!
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| Click to see full-size image. |
 when the going gets weird, the weird turn pro |
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Benny Brox
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« Reply #17 on: December 12, 2007, 10:22:27 PM » |
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The thing is though, Celtic ain't gonna go far in the Champy League and Rangers will progress further than them in Europe but neither will do anything significant, like reach a final for at least 50 years. Whoever wins the league this year or next year or however many years Scottish football and Rangers & Celtic aren't going to improve until the Old Firm join the English League. Nobody likes the Old Firm in Scotland so we should just get the fuck out.
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Suited_Jock
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« Reply #18 on: December 12, 2007, 10:31:50 PM » |
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we'll just keep racking up the cash though until we can break free... £6 MILLION !>!?!!?!?!  muahhahaha |
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GlasgowBandit
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« Reply #19 on: December 12, 2007, 10:46:36 PM » |
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Its a good job that the SPL aided Rangers by cancelling that crucial game against Gretna at the weekend otherwise it could have been 6  |
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Teacake
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« Reply #20 on: December 12, 2007, 11:03:58 PM » |
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Its a good job that the SPL aided Rangers by cancelling that crucial game against Gretna at the weekend otherwise it could have been 6 Postponementaments LOL |
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AndrewT
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« Reply #21 on: December 12, 2007, 11:18:31 PM » |
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Its a good job that the SPL aided Rangers by cancelling that crucial game against Gretna at the weekend otherwise it could have been 6 I think they could have done with the shooting practice. |
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Scottish Dave
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« Reply #22 on: December 12, 2007, 11:19:25 PM » |
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we'll just keep racking up the cash though until we can break free... £6 MILLION !>!?!!?!?! muahhahaha Priceless! |
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BigTomatoes
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« Reply #23 on: December 13, 2007, 07:43:09 PM » |
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The thing is though, Celtic ain't gonna go far in the Champy League and Rangers will progress further than them in Europe lol , class. is that the thing ? the ' thing ' is Celtic have already went far in the Champions League. and another ' thing ' is Celtic have already went further than Rangers in the Champions league oh and one more ' thing ' , the only way Rangers can progress ' further ' in Europe this year than Celtic is if you consider reaching the latter stages of the UEFA cup after failing in the Champions League progress. thats the ' thing ' good post though |
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is it cold in his shadow ?
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GlasgowBandit
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« Reply #24 on: December 13, 2007, 07:58:16 PM » |
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The thing is though, Celtic ain't gonna go far in the Champy League and Rangers will progress further than them in Europe lol , class. is that the thing ? the ' thing ' is Celtic have already went far in the Champions League. and another ' thing ' is Celtic have already went further than Rangers in the Champions league oh and one more ' thing ' , the only way Rangers can progress ' further ' in Europe this year than Celtic is if you consider reaching the latter stages of the UEFA cup after failing in the Champions League progress. thats the ' thing ' good post though Another "thing" is this . . . . . . . . . . . Tell all the H**s you know we're in the champions league and they're know! |
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Teacake
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« Reply #25 on: December 13, 2007, 09:00:51 PM » |
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The thing is though, Celtic ain't gonna go far in the Champy League and Rangers will progress further than them in Europe lol , class. is that the thing ? the ' thing ' is Celtic have already went far in the Champions League. and another ' thing ' is Celtic have already went further than Rangers in the Champions league oh and one more ' thing ' , the only way Rangers can progress ' further ' in Europe this year than Celtic is if you consider reaching the latter stages of the UEFA cup after failing in the Champions League progress. thats the ' thing ' good post though Another "thing" is this . . . . . . . . . . . Tell all the H**s you know we're in the champions league and they're know! Well we would tell them if they came out of hiding, must be really hurting! |
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Teacake
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« Reply #26 on: December 19, 2007, 06:14:27 PM » |
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TightEnd
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« Reply #27 on: December 19, 2007, 06:16:36 PM » |
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Mr Donnelly sir, is this really you posting.? V V Out of character to be so confrontational!
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My eyes are open wide
By the way,I made it through the day
I watch the world outside
By the way, I'm leaving out today
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Teacake
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« Reply #28 on: December 19, 2007, 06:29:32 PM » |
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Mr Donnelly sir, is this really you posting.? V V Out of character to be so confrontational!
LOL Its only Glasgow banter mate, I'll get it back in spades soon enough  |
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