right im going to answer these with complete honesty and just hope the do gooders amongst you dont condemn me to easily!
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1 Did you ever lose time from work/school due to gambling?
yes used to bunk college to attend friday afternoon meetings at romford dogs2 Has gambling ever made your home life unhappy?
yes caused many rows during my married life and eventually it was a major contributor to my marriage ending.3 Did gambling affect your reputation?
no didnt have one in the first place4. Have you ever felt remorse after gambling?
yes many many times after a bad losing session5. Did you ever gamblle to win money to pay back debts?
yes often gambled to try to clear debts usually unsuccessfully6. Did gambling cause a decrease in your ambition/efficiency?
no have always been ambitious 7. After losing did you feel you must return asap to win it back?
no used to spend time feeling sorry for myself trying to convince myself i had give up.8. After a win do you have a strong urge to return and win more?
no usually slow my gambling down after a win to enjoy the fruits of my labour.9 Did you gamble until your last dollar was gone?
yes many times i have gone skint and had to walk home from the dogtrack10 Did you ever borrow to finance your gambling?
yes usually to pay off debts incurred by gambling11 Have you ever sold anytihng to finance your gambling?
yes once sold my car to pay off a gambling debt12 Were you reluctant to use gambling money for everyday purchases?
no my family have never gone without13 Did gambling make you care of your/your family's welfare?
no same answer as above14 Did you gamble often longer than you had planned?
yes often popped to the bookies for an hour and end up being thrown out at closing time 6 hours later15 Have you ever gambled to escape worry or trouble?
yes i used to use gambling as an escape from everyday troubles.at times the only enviroment i felt comfortable in16 Have you ever committed an illegal act to finance gambling?
yes made a mistake 20 yrs ago payed my dues.17 Has gambling caused you difficulty sleeping?
yes plenty of times over the years18 Do arguments and disappointments create within you the urge to gamble?
yes again a gambler will run to the enviroment hes comfortable in19 Did you ever celebrate good fortune by gambling?
yes had to think here but sure i must have at some point over the years20 Has gambling ever led you to contemplate suicide?
yes im afraid many years ago i contemplated it a few times.thats 14/20
as i said i have been completely honest here something i can do know after many years of being in denail.
i am a compulsive gambler and have done 2 short stints at GA which i failed to get on with.it helps for some people but i found dealing with the problem myself much more successful.
GA has very religious undertones and being a non religious person i struggled to accept or feel comfortable with this.
as i say i am a compulsive gambler and like any other addiction it will always be in me.
but like others i find poker has helped me in my recovery ( actually only form of gambling ive ever shown a profit on in the long term) and i spend less time gambling in other ways.
i still enjoy a bet and a night at the dogs but gamble more for fun now and my stakes are alot lower than they were in the dark days.
im still prone to the odd tilt in the bookies as well as the poker table but thats my make up,
im an impulsive and compulsive person but i can honestly say that today im more in control than ive ever been and tomorrow il be more in control than i am today.
like all problems and addictions one day at a time.
cant believe i wrote all this down for public display to people i hardly know to read but if feels good.
thanks for reading but i gotta go my yankees just starting on tonights sky dogs at walthamstow
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