The Road To Recovery

[sovietsong]

quick fixes for you sovietsong

Avoid small talk staples like...

'how are you doing today'
'what've you been up to at the weekend'

as the real answers are probs 'shit' and 'fuck all - I bought some mince to make bolognaise but I et crisps instead of cooking spaghetti coz who can be assed and although I could cook the mince tonight I'm more likely to get a take away and it'll go out of date and I'll chuck it away. I have no worth, woe woe is me'
but the answers you'll get will be 'fine' and 'not much, how about yourself'

don't talk about the weather either, not so much because of sensitivity to mental illness, more becauase it's a boring thing to talk about

bitch about colleagues, wots been on the telly, crazy shit in the news or wacky youtube videos. Don't compliment her for the sake of it, she's no an idiot and she'll feel patronised. Low self esteem, she won't believe you half the time even if you're genuine. If she's done owt decent then crack on and mention it
 though. While it won't get through half the time, the other half it will. (or it might)

you can't fix things but you can increase the probability that she will bypass your office the day she comes to work armed to the teeth and shoots people seemingly at random before Gazza turns up to end things one way or another.

You don't need a book, I'll see you right
amongst the above toungue in cheek stream of conciousness that is completely inappropriate for the tone of the thread there may or may not be hidden some good advice.

thanks mate.  PM sent

[StuartHopkin]

Just received the following anonymous email

"What the fuck is wrong with you, have you no pride? give it a rest with the poor little me act and either kill your self or just crawl off back to the asylum where you obviously belong"

Seems like not everyone thinks it is an issue worth highlighting.

Whoever sent this is in just as bad a place if not worse than you are Kev.
Ridiculous.

The only asylum we would like to see you crawling back into is DTD for a Jack & Ginger at somepoint.

Got a big gay hug saved up for you at somepoint.

[Woodsey]

Just received the following anonymous email

"What the fuck is wrong with you, have you no pride? give it a rest with the poor little me act and either kill your self or just crawl off back to the asylum where you obviously belong"

Seems like not everyone thinks it is an issue worth highlighting.

WTF is wrong with some people?

[AndrewT]

Just received the following anonymous email

"What the fuck is wrong with you, have you no pride? give it a rest with the poor little me act and either kill your self or just crawl off back to the asylum where you obviously belong"

Seems like not everyone thinks it is an issue worth highlighting.

FML - I left the last line off.

'Lots of love   AndrewT xxx'

[TightPaulFolds]

could i ask for some advice please, a girl I work with suffers from depression.  She has treatment etc and is comfortable talking to some people about it, i find it hard not to give advice etc even though I dont have a clue about the in's and outs of these things, what kind of things can i do to 'help' without isolating her or making things worse.

any tips are much appreciated as i think i upset her the other day... sigh...

Do you get the feeling that no matter what you say, it is interpreted in a generally negative way? There may be a defect in her thinking style that causes this. Very little of worth that you can say will escape a global, general, negative schema.
Good advice from Kev, just listen.

[thetank]

The e-mail is pretty low. Who anonymously tells someone who has recently been suicidal to go kill themselves ffs.

Good example of when all that 'understanding those that don't understand' piss that I was banging on about a couple of pages ago goes out the window. This is the sort of person that needs putting into a box (either 'complete tosser', 'keyboard warrior', 'life fail' or 'total moron' box is good) and then not thinking more about it in any kind of serious capacity.

On happy note, AndrewT gag is good and needs love. Would quote it and put in smileys but on phone so that's a pain.

[Bainn]

Surely no email is truly "Anonymous" these days ?

The path the email took will be in the headers and background code of the email, maybe Bongo can confirm this ?

Kev, pass the email onto Bongo to see if he can find any information & then maybe contact the police ?

[thetank]

The po po?

Yo yo is that the po po. I got this e-mail, someone on the internet said something mean to me and... click... hello? Hello?

If you can find out who it is then happy days, you know who the douschebag was but the po po?

[Longines]

Surely no email is truly "Anonymous" these days ?

If you're the NSA then probably not. For everyone else, anonymous remailers are pretty much untraceable. Someone still emails me occasional news cuttings on Marcus Bebb-Jones because I posted on the thread that discussed his case. The sender is clever enough to use an anonymous remailer.

[Mango99]

I read the whole of the blog last night. Although I've not seen Kev for at least a couple of years, I think he's a top bloke who always seems cheerful and is forever cracking jokes/taking the piss. I had no idea that anything was wrong.

I think it's very brave to post up your experiences for all to read, but also very worthwhile, especially given the fact that it has already helped someone think twice about killing themselves.

Good luck for the future. It sounds like you are doing all the right things to get back on track

As for the email, that's a ridiculously mean and incredibly cowardly thing to do. In fact, I think it's possibly the most cowardly thing I've ever read. I highly doubt someone with those views would possess the limited intelligence required to send an untraceable email. Pass it on to a computer bod imo.

Your ex threatening to sue you seems a bit mean-spirited. Obviously I don't know her side of the story, but from what I've read you haven't (until that point in the blog, at least) said anything negative about her.

[Dingdell]

Kev - if someone is depressed should you continue to treat them as you normally would or should you act differently? For example if they have done something wrong should you tell them/discuss it with them or is it better to let it go? Does treating them differently than you normally would help or hinder? Thanks.

[Claw75]

Not quite sure what you mean by:

When you think what it involves, that's like 

?

I mean when you consider the often devastating impact on the individua/their family, and the resultant cost to society in treating them/and often sadly putting them through the criminal justice system;  x 1/100 ish of the population lifetime risk, that is a very high overall cost to the nation.

From what I can find, the likelyhood of someone with schizophrenia committing a crime is approximately 3 times that of someone without the condition, with approximately 8% of schizophrenics having been charged with a violent offence.  To put that into perspective, if we're talking about 1% of the population suffering with this disorder, then the additional cost to the nation of putting people with schizophrenia through the criminal justice system is a tiny proportion of the overall cost of dealing with criminals.  Same goes for the cost of medical treatment.

the fact is, the vast majority of people with schizophrenia are not criminals, are not dangerous, and can live normal lives with the right treatment but highlighting those facts doesn't sell newspapers as well as the headlines that 'yet another schizo freak has been left free to commit murder', further fuelling the negative stereotype.

Really good article in today's Independent from a journalist who has suffered with paranoid psychosis

http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/features/living-with-psychosis-im-mad-but-not-bad-2025012.html

What kind of job was it that stated that they didn't want people that have suffered from manic depression or schizophrenia?

it was a blanket exclusion for all applications to work in that particular department including admin posts etc

How is some that is truly depressed able to put on such a happy front? And what makes them want to do that?

General question obv.

Just to add to Kev's reply on this, the other thing to bear in mind is that just because someone suffers from depression and may be clinically depressed, they won't always be feeling at rock bottom and will want to try to fight it.  What makes people want to put on a happy front?  Well, who wants to be seen as a miserable git all the time?  Depression and low self-esteem often go hand-in-hand. When you've got low self-esteem then you want people to like you.  Thinking of my circle of friends and acquaintances, the people I know who suffer with depression are among the most outwardly outgoing and happy-go-lucky.

[Jon MW]

...

What kind of job was it that stated that they didn't want people that have suffered from manic depression or schizophrenia?

it was a blanket exclusion for all applications to work in that particular department including admin posts etc
...

Aren't the only reasons legally allowed for discrimination if you can reasonably demonstrate that it will interfere with the job?

And with the Disability Discrimination Act enforcing 'reasonably adjustments', even that's a bit hazy.

Obviously there may be specific exemptions for various mental illness - but it definitely doesn't sound legal.

[Claw75]

...

What kind of job was it that stated that they didn't want people that have suffered from manic depression or schizophrenia?

it was a blanket exclusion for all applications to work in that particular department including admin posts etc
...

Aren't the only reasons legally allowed for discrimination if you can reasonably demonstrate that it will interfere with the job?

And with the Disability Discrimination Act enforcing 'reasonably adjustments', even that's a bit hazy.

Obviously there may be specific exemptions for various mental illness - but it definitely doesn't sound legal.

it's a bit of a grey area - I'm sure to be allowed to have put that on the website they must have sought some kind of advice on the legality of it as far as associated risks with those conditions are concerned.  It's being investigated by the people at Time to Change and Mind anyway, but would be interesting to see what justification they would come up with if subjected to a legal challenge.

[GreekStein]

Whenever I see 'anonymous' I insta put them into the 'coward' category and listen to approx 0 of what they say.