A joke I heard today:
A single man was cleaning the attic in his bachelor pad whe he stumbled upon a small gold lamp.
A firm believer in the paranormal, he quickly gave it a rub and crossed his fingers.
To his joy, out popped a genie.
"I AM THE GENIE OF THE LAMP!" he boomed, "AND I GRANT YOU ONE, AND ONE ONLY, WISH"
The bachelor mulled it over for a moment before saying, "I'd love to see some of these wars come to an end."
"WHICH WAR?" exclaims the genie.
The bachelor unwravels a map and points out Palestine and Israel.
"Please could you put a stop to the Arab-Israeli conflict? I'm sick of hearing about folk over there being killed."
Slightly bemused, the genie leans down towards the bachelor and says, "Look mate, I know I'm a genie an all, but I can't work bloomin miracles. Isn't their something simpler you'd like. Something for you. Besides, my map reading skills are shoddy."
"Well", he replies, "I've been single for ages now. I'd love to meet a young beautiful girl who loves me for my personality. Cooks, cleans, and doesn't nag. It's not much to ask for."
The genie pauses for a moment before saying, "Give us that bloomin map."
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