A few good men --- "Can you Handle the Truth?"

[matt674]

Men strike back! ! ! ! ! ! !

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be open when she brings it.
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Why is a Laundry a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts the sentence with "A man once told me..."
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you open the door.
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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told.
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
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Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
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Send this to a few good men who need a laugh and to the select few women who can handle the truth.

[M3boy]

If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you open the door


Neally chocked on my coffee!!! 

[TightEnd]

We need a female mod.

About time someone said so.

[matt674]

We need a female mod.

funnily enough the thought did cross my mind when i read the original email at work and i thought about posting it on here!!

[ariston]

theres 3 million of these

i like the how many women does it take to change a lightbulb. 2- one to put thew kettle on and one to go get that nice man from next door.

or

why do women have legs?
a) to get them from the kitchen to the bedroom or b) youve seen what a mess slugs leave

[charmaine]

 

[Trace]

Simple things......................

[charmaine]

Simple things......................

So true Trace , was a laugh seeing Paul choke on his coffee though  ............ justice 

[ripple11]

Simple things......................

So true Trace , was a laugh seeing Paul choke on his coffee though  ............ justice 

...lucky he let you in..........

[charmaine]

Simple things......................

So true Trace , was a laugh seeing Paul choke on his coffee though  ............ justice 

...lucky he let you in..........

He wouldnt dare let the dog in first !! 

[kinboshi]

[charmaine]

Pauls gone to play poker in Luton tonight , might be a good idea to lock him out 

[tantrum]

A woman needs only four animals in her life: a mink on her back, a jaguar in her garage, a tiger in her bed, and a jackass to pay for it all.




Feminism: A socialist, anti-family political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians. - Pat Robertson