What would u do? (lending $$$ to a poker friend)

[wsopin07]

I am looking for some advice!

During the 2005 WSOP (yeah 2 years ago) my hotel room was robbed and I lost $20K plus. A "friend of mine" loaned me $10K because I only had about $3k left. I ended up w/ a big cash, paid him back w/ a $1K thank you bonus and life went on.

A few weeks later we were playing blackjack and I could not lose, and he could not win as he was sitting right next to me. He "borrowed $50K of my winnings and told me I would have it back w/in days!!!!!!

I was very understanding when the repayment process began to drag out. I did not bug him much as I was sure when he hit a "big" comp that I would be paid. ( I later found put that he won $52K on party poker and did not pay me a dime)

About 4 months ago I get a call from my "friend" and he tell me that he is in treatment for a gambling problem and he does not have the money he owes me

If you were me what would u do?

[Ironside]

if you can afford to forget about it as a bad debt you never know one day it might arrive

and never load money in a casino enviorment again

if you cant afford to lose the money let him know you cant right it off

[Newmanseye]

well for a $50k debt i would enlist the help from some "professional" money collectors, they may offer him some treatment that will inspire him to repay what he owes.

Been in a similar position Brian and it was my best mate and he owes me £12k hasdone for 5 years now, he faded from existence once he decided not to repay the money, Dont let your "friend" get away with it IMHO.

[byronkincaid]

either write the money off in your head and one day you may be surprised and he'll pay you back

set up a standing order from his bank account to yours for something like $500 a month. will take forever but at least you get it back eventually.

sell the debt to the biggest nastiest bastard you can find to get him back for not paying you when he won the online tourney.

[iceman]

forget about it and have better judgement not to speak publicly about it again

[Ginger]

forget about it and have better judgement not to speak publicly about it again

Surely speaking publicly about the issue has nothing to do with it. A fair few people in this predicament would feel quite happy to name and shame, Brain hasn't done that....

[iceman]

forget about it and have better judgement not to speak publicly about it again

Surely speaking publicly about the issue has nothing to do with it. A fair few people in this predicament would feel quite happy to name and shame, Brain hasn't done that....

[iceman]

no he hasnt named the guy and i wasnt referring in anyway that he had or would. i should have expanded my reply by saying hes not the 1st and wont be the last guy to get knocked by someone he considered/s a pal. in my experience and upbringing your far better off by taking some situations however hurtful and keeping them private. this is one such and i fail to see what can be achieved by broadcasting this sorry situation on a public forum.

[wsopin07]

1) I could hire someone to take care of it!
2) I could cause trouble for my "friend"
3) I could just forget about it!

The reason I posted the question is that this "friend" had duped  me and I thought I could get some simple advice and start a discussion about loaning money to friends !

If someone learns from my mistake I would be happy to know that I helped someone else avoid something that really sucks. Its not just about the $$$$ either, it sucks that he would win $52K and not even think of paying me back!

[wsopin07]

forget about it and have better judgement not to speak publicly about it again

you could be right, I dont know

[fearisthekey]

no he hasnt named the guy and i wasnt referring in anyway that he had or would. i should have expanded my reply by saying hes not the 1st and wont be the last guy to get knocked by someone he considered/s a pal. in my experience and upbringing your far better off by taking some situations however hurtful and keeping them private. this is one such and i fail to see what can be achieved by broadcasting this sorry situation on a public forum.

He would be broadcasting it if he mentioned the guy by name, he didn't. He was his friend, he was in need, his friend borrowed under the pretext of paying back, he didn't, it's similar to theft if he shows no intention of repaying. Very valid material for a forum discussion, in my opinion.
Best not lend. Lesson learnt.

[iceman]

no he hasnt named the guy and i wasnt referring in anyway that he had or would. i should have expanded my reply by saying hes not the 1st and wont be the last guy to get knocked by someone he considered/s a pal. in my experience and upbringing your far better off by taking some situations however hurtful and keeping them private. this is one such and i fail to see what can be achieved by broadcasting this sorry situation on a public forum.

He would be broadcasting it if he mentioned the guy by name, he didn't. He was his friend, he was in need, his friend borrowed under the pretext of paying back, he didn't, it's similar to theft if he shows no intention of repaying. Very valid material for a forum discussion, in my opinion.
Best not lend. Lesson learnt.

what does brian gain from this announcement apart from warning others which i doubt has any effect as i believe you have to experience this behaviour before you can prepare against it.

[byronkincaid]

no he hasnt named the guy and i wasnt referring in anyway that he had or would. i should have expanded my reply by saying hes not the 1st and wont be the last guy to get knocked by someone he considered/s a pal. in my experience and upbringing your far better off by taking some situations however hurtful and keeping them private. this is one such and i fail to see what can be achieved by broadcasting this sorry situation on a public forum.

He would be broadcasting it if he mentioned the guy by name, he didn't. He was his friend, he was in need, his friend borrowed under the pretext of paying back, he didn't, it's similar to theft if he shows no intention of repaying. Very valid material for a forum discussion, in my opinion.
Best not lend. Lesson learnt.

what does brian gain from this announcement apart from warning others which i doubt has any effect as i believe you have to experience this behaviour before you can prepare against it.

why does he have to have something to gain? a lot of blonde is just people having a chat like you'd do having a pint with your mates.

as to whether or not you can learn from internet posts about this sort of thing, i certainly wouldn't lend T.J. Cloutier any money because of what I've read, yet lot's of people still seem to do so...

[iceman]

really byron the questions retorical. if you think brian can help himself in the long term with this sort of discuussion i disagree. and your analogy of this being a pub type chat with friends i think youre mistaken,this forum is reported and commented on far and wide and does not recieve the type of confidentiality youd expect from such.

[fearisthekey]

really byron the questions retorical. if you think brian can help himself in the long term with this sort of discuussion i disagree. and your analogy of this being a pub type chat with friends i think youre mistaken,this forum is reported and commented on far and wide and does not recieve the type of confidentiality youd expect from such.

ok i think you're right this is a very public wide read forum.
I think if I lent someone 50 grand I'd be pretty pissed off if he was clearly making no effort to get it back to me. But if this was a friend I'd be hurt as well, it seems to demonstrate that he has more to gain by running off with the money than he sought to gain from the friendship. So pissed off and hurt, I'd want to share it in a community, softens the blow.
I'd be worried about confidentiality if he was mentioning names, but he was wise enough not to.
It happened to me, wsop07, for a much smaller amount, it's not a nice experience.