free cash for kids or should they earn it?

[celtic]

Kids are Kids, and the greatest thing  that can happen to someone. Give them what they want.(within reason) £100 pm is not excessive imo. U only have one life. TOO MUCH EMPHASIS ON MONEY. Making them earn it doesnt get you respect. You get that from them in other ways.

[Laxie]

If I were you, i really wouldn't show your wife the thread.  You know her best of course, but it might not go down too well if it looks like you've been airing your disagreements on a public forum and basically intend to show her the views of people she doesn't know to back up your argument.  I'd probably just say 'i've been doing a bit of research on the internet, and it seems most people with teenage kids expect them to help round the house', or something.

Your right not worth a rolliking yet will wait til i get more response then shower them down on her

 If you even hint that you've made this post she will have your nuts in a vice..it's the way of the woman. Pretend all the arguements are your own..never tell her you posted it on your poker forum

OMG...if you insist on showing her the posts, I'd LOVE to be a fly on the wall during the errrrrrrm...chat.   

Do yourself a favour and follow their advice.  Pretend you've thought this out all on your own.  Otherwise, you'll be back here relaying the tale of your own undoing.   

[boldie]

Kids are Kids, and the greatest thing  that can happen to someone. Give them what they want.(within reason) £100 pm is not excessive imo. U only have one life. TOO MUCH EMPHASIS ON MONEY. Making them earn it doesnt get you respect. You get that from them in other ways.

your post contradicts itsself in soo many ways. "Too much emphasis on money"..so you give kids 100£ a month..does that teach them that money isn't everything? "Give them what they want" "making them earn it doesn't get you respect"?


This thread is not about getting respect from your kids..You're right, if you can't get that another way money (or withholding it) isn't going to help.
What it is about is giving them some semblance of what the real world is like and it sure as hell isn't a free for all where everyone does feck all and gets loads of free money. 100£ a month in spending money is WAY too much for a 13 YO..I would almost argue that it's a perverted to give a 13 YO that much. And the kid also does nothing in the house?
Before you know it you will be on some shitty reality TV show asking why your kids are soo out of control.

[celtic]

Why should children have to earn money? As a parent it is my responsibilty to provide for what my daughter wants (within reason) And if that £5 per month or £200 per month. Who decides what the right figure should be? I want my daughter to have the best I can give her. Theres nothing wrong with that surely? So if CIA's missus feels the same then what is she doing wrong?

[Colchester Kev]

I will tell you why, give a 13 year old girl 100 quid a month for doing naff all ... she already expects it , now when she reaches 14, 15 years old what incentive does she have to get a saturday job or a paper round etc etc .. NONE, she can get 100 quid a month for just doing nothing why would she want to get out of bed and actually go and work for it .. where do kids learn a work ethic from ? 

[celtic]

ANd why should they be forced to go out and earn before they are 16? When you stick in and wiggle it about you know that if you produce a child then you are responsible for them until they become adults. Since when did that responsibilty stop when they are 14? Don't see what's wrong with 'funding' them within reason. My daughter has just turned 10. She understands the concept of where & how money comes from. If i say i'm skint, then thats the end of it, if i can afford to buy her something that she wants, she is grateful. What's wrong with that?

[Colchester Kev]

ANd why should they be forced to go out and earn before they are 16? When you stick in and wiggle it about you know that if you produce a child then you are responsible for them until they become adults. Since when did that responsibilty stop when they are 14? Don't see what's wrong with 'funding' them within reason. My daughter has just turned 10. She understands the concept of where & how money comes from. If i say i'm skint, then thats the end of it, if i can afford to buy her something that she wants, she is grateful. What's wrong with that?

Nothing wrong with that, you have stated that she understands the concept of where and how money comes from ... thats the important thing IMO.

there is no right and perfect way to bring up kids, everyone has different opinions, all we as parents can do is raise our kids to the best of our ability and prepare them for their futures ... IMO one of the most important things to pass on is the fact that no one gives money away for nothing, you want money you have to earn it.

[celtic]

Earn it from 13?

[Colchester Kev]

Earn it from 13?

Not earn it in the sense where she has to put in shifts down a bloody coal mine. but yes I personally think 13 is plenty old enough to start learning that life isnt a freeroll.

[cia260895]

I will tell you why, give a 13 year old girl 100 quid a month for doing naff all ... she already expects it , now when she reaches 14, 15 years old what incentive does she have to get a saturday job or a paper round etc etc .. NONE, she can get 100 quid a month for just doing nothing why would she want to get out of bed and actually go and work for it .. where do kids learn a work ethic from ? 

your forgetting about inflation m8 when she is 14 it'll have to go up an so on ,this is the kid who got rewarded for stealing and lying bout the fags!!!

[celtic]

I will tell you why, give a 13 year old girl 100 quid a month for doing naff all ... she already expects it , now when she reaches 14, 15 years old what incentive does she have to get a saturday job or a paper round etc etc .. NONE, she can get 100 quid a month for just doing nothing why would she want to get out of bed and actually go and work for it .. where do kids learn a work ethic from ? 

your forgetting about inflation m8 when she is 14 it'll have to go up an so on ,this is the kid who got rewarded for stealing and lying bout the fags!!!

Sounds like the british criminal justice system


 

[cia260895]

money isn't the issue here as me and the wife are both in well paid jobs maybe thats part of the problem too,its easy for the wife to shell out all the time, and just a small development she now has her own bank card so she can be responsible for her money??? and what happens when the youngest reaches that age does she get £100 pm as well?? oh and also the family allowance doesn't go into the household funds it goes into the girls savings accounts for when they are 18 or 21

[cia260895]

I will tell you why, give a 13 year old girl 100 quid a month for doing naff all ... she already expects it , now when she reaches 14, 15 years old what incentive does she have to get a saturday job or a paper round etc etc .. NONE, she can get 100 quid a month for just doing nothing why would she want to get out of bed and actually go and work for it .. where do kids learn a work ethic from ? 

here here well said m8

[ericstoner]

Only cihild Celtic !

[celtic]

Yeah, good point i suppose.

Don't think i would treat the future ones different tho. Kev summed it up well, we all bring them up different and try and be the best parent etc...