the funniest thing you have said on a poker table .

[vinni]

what is yours ?.

  Heres one that happened to me in newcastle a few years ago .
I'm on the button and put in a raise (with a bag of spanners).
big blind comes along for the ride ,i hit a full house on the flop .
10 10 3 flop .
i bet out ,he calls  ,he has 66 .turn is a 2 ,i bet he calls ,river another 2 .i bet he calls .
when i am scooping the pot in he calls me under his breath a fat c..t ,
i ask him if i heard him correctly ,he says i did .
i then say ,do you know why I'm fat ,because every time i give your missus one she gives me a biscuit.
with in the next ten minutes i have all his chips ,he had steam coming out of his ears .

[byronkincaid]

I'm Byron from Surbiton. Who the fuck are you?

[Bongo]

I think I once said I could deal.

[Girgy85]

what is yours ?.

  Heres one that happened to me in newcastle a few years ago .
I'm on the button and put in a raise (with a bag of spanners).
big blind comes along for the ride ,i hit a full house on the flop .
10 10 3 flop .
i bet out ,he calls  ,he has 66 .turn is a 2 ,i bet he calls ,river another 2 .i bet he calls .
when i am scooping the pot in he calls me under his breath a fat c..t ,
i ask him if i heard him correctly ,he says i did .
i then say ,do you know why I'm fat ,because every time i give your missus one she gives me a biscuit.
with in the next ten minutes i have all his chips ,he had steam coming out of his ears .

 

[ripple11]

 Famous Cricket Sledges......


Glenn McGrath & Eddo Brandes: After Brandes played & missed at a
McGrath delivery, the Aussie bowler politely enquired: "Oi, Brandes, why
are you so fat?" Brandes retorted, "Cos every time I ***** your wife she
gives me a biscuit".

[GreekStein]

what is yours ?.

  Heres one that happened to me in newcastle a few years ago .
I'm on the button and put in a raise (with a bag of spanners).
big blind comes along for the ride ,i hit a full house on the flop .
10 10 3 flop .
i bet out ,he calls  ,he has 66 .turn is a 2 ,i bet he calls ,river another 2 .i bet he calls .
when i am scooping the pot in he calls me under his breath a fat c..t ,
i ask him if i heard him correctly ,he says i did .
i then say ,do you know why I'm fat ,because every time i give your missus one she gives me a biscuit.
with in the next ten minutes i have all his chips ,he had steam coming out of his ears .

I think that quote was made famous by a west Indian cricketer who repeated it to either Glen McGrath or Brett Lee when the was being given shit about being fat.

It's on youtube I think.

[GreekStein]

Famous Cricket Sledges......


Glenn McGrath & Eddo Brandes: After Brandes played & missed at a
McGrath delivery, the Aussie bowler politely enquired: "Oi, Brandes, why
are you so fat?" Brandes retorted, "Cos every time I ***** your wife she
gives me a biscuit".

Not only quicker than me but you were more accurate too!

If I remember rightly, McGrath went abs mad. I think it got to him so much because his wife had cancer at the time.

[vinni]

so come on then what is yours ?

[TheChipPrince]

Famous Cricket Sledges......


Glenn McGrath & Eddo Brandes: After Brandes played & missed at a
McGrath delivery, the Aussie bowler politely enquired: "Oi, Brandes, why
are you so fat?" Brandes retorted, "Cos every time I ***** your wife she
gives me a biscuit".

Not only quicker than me but you were more accurate too!

If I remember rightly, McGrath went abs mad. I think it got to him so much because his wife had cancer at the time.

and died last year, hence all the pink clothes the current side wear...

[Eck]

Don't say much myself, but once heard Kinboshi say raise....



He was joking obviously

[Colchester Kev]

The Vinni Vinh one was funnier Barry

[WarBwastard]

In Vegas last year I'm heads-up in a pot with a young miss sat right opposite me.  The action is on me, but first I take a long look at her and she sees my eyes going up and down and side to side and thinks I'm counting her chips.  She tells she has about 15,000 chips.  I says to her, I says deadpan, I says, "I'm not counting your chips, I'm looking at your tits."  The guy next to me though is her husband and elbows me in the face...the floor man wearing cowboy boots starts kicking me in the kidneys when I'm on the floor and the guy in the 8 seat who's the girls father jabs me in the throat with his walking stick and throws his coffee in my eyes.  Hilarious it was.

Or did you want real stories?

[Longy]

I once said "gg" at the end of a sng but i think the other guy had left already.

You should have been there, it was amazing.

[thetank]

I once said "gg" at the end of a sng but i think the other guy had left already.

You should have been there, it was amazing.

I once said "ty u2" at the start of a sit n go after someone had said "good luck everybody"
It was a long time ago, I didn't even think about it beforehand, it just came out.

Have blocked chat ever since that day. I had to decide whether to concentrate on being an online poker player or a modern day Oscar Wilde.

[maccol]

I once said "gg" at the end of a sng but i think the other guy had left already.

You should have been there, it was amazing.

Nasty rubdown imo.Just as well the other guy had left or there could have been trouble.