the funniest thing you have said on a poker table .

[GreekStein]

If he's the same one, plays reg. £1/£2 at DTD.

Tighter than a very tight thing.

sounds like him! legend though

[Newmanseye]

For me the funniest thing at a poker table was still this after so many years on. Blonde bash 2


Sue HM after being asked "what will you do if you make the money"  nearly floored Teacake and I  when she replied "We get money!!!!  Ooohh I might buy a new outfit". What a classy lady

[lazaroonie]

playing at an incredibly dull cash game at the horseshoe in tunica, i was sitting across the table from a mate of mine, we got involved in a pretty meaty pot headsup, where i was playing with air, trying to setup a bluff on the river which never happened, and he scooped the pot.  couple of minutes later he said, 'oh i nearly forgot, i;ve still got your carkeys', and handed them to me.

an old timer looked in astonishment and said in his southern drawl 'you two are freinds ? hell buddy with friends like that you dont need no enemies'.


i remember first sitting down at a poker table over there (cash) and on the small blind. it was folded all the way round, and i raised it, guy in the bb laughed and said 'no, over here we generally just take back the blinds if there is no action. but since your new i will play along with you.' and called the bet.

flop came A A x. i bet out, him still laughing, called.

turn came a 2 i bet out , he called, laughing (as if i was some dumb schmuck he was just playing along with)

river came and i bet again. this time the laughing stopped, and he re-raised it for all his stack (about 500 bucks).

i called in a heartbeat, flipped over my a 2. i dont know if he laughed anymore, since he was gone from the table in about 5 seconds, his a k looking decidely second best.

caused much hilarity at the table for the next few hours.

 

[Snatiramas]

I don't generally like too much chatting at the table and laughing is definitely a no no. I think on occassion I may have made the occassional remark but in honesty they were all time and place specific in a sort of " you had to be there"  way.

Only one event stays fresh in the memory.

In 2006 I managed by a string of fortuitous circumstances to find myself playing in Vegas. It had been a good trip and I was a little up having played a few sit n gos and managing a cash in one tournament. It was towards the end of the trip and I was playing at the Mirage in a sit n go. I liked the Mirage as it reminded me of the old Grosvenor Luton. Very cramped but a good atmosphere. Also the Carnegie Deli was a very short trundle away. Having just packed away one of their sandwiches, and I recommend you try one to understand the true meaning of the word waste, I am sitting at the table burping quietly away to myself. The gentle waft of saltbeef being dragged up from the depths of my stomach is best done with a closed mouth so as not to upset anybody nearby.

For some reason the good Lord has placed me next to one of Americas finest. A young man called Rick, or prick, or something. Anyway all through the first three levels all I can hear is this guy telling all around him how good he is, how crap we are etc. etc. I live to meet this type of person. I lull them into a false sense of security, do my I am a very weak player act (of course you all know it is not an act but you have to promise not to tell anybody else) and let him walk into my full house for 100% of my chip stack and about 75% of his.

He sits down for the first time keeping very quiet. A tinge of red on the cheeks and neck show his embarrasment at the way he played the hand which involved no skill from me. Having stacked his chips in front of me. I sat back in my chair, gave him a diffident look and issued the ultimate put down, I said


Sorry.

Never used it before or since

[Robert HM]

For me the funniest thing at a poker table was still this after so many years on. Blonde bash 2


Sue HM after being asked "what will you do if you make the money"  nearly floored Teacake and I  when she replied "We get money!!!!  Ooohh I might buy a new outfit". What a classy lady

sigh

[bobAlike]

Sitting at a table with Matt Tyler a couple of years ago in the Broadway festival ME.
Matt commented that a player "played a good game."
I piped up "Pity it's Monopoly."

I was a sore loser that day.

[Ironside]

I don't generally like too much chatting at the table and laughing is definitely a no no. I think on occassion I may have made the occassional remark but in honesty they were all time and place specific in a sort of " you had to be there"  way.

Only one event stays fresh in the memory.

In 2006 I managed by a string of fortuitous circumstances to find myself playing in Vegas. It had been a good trip and I was a little up having played a few sit n gos and managing a cash in one tournament. It was towards the end of the trip and I was playing at the Mirage in a sit n go. I liked the Mirage as it reminded me of the old Grosvenor Luton. Very cramped but a good atmosphere. Also the Carnegie Deli was a very short trundle away. Having just packed away one of their sandwiches, and I recommend you try one to understand the true meaning of the word waste, I am sitting at the table burping quietly away to myself. The gentle waft of saltbeef being dragged up from the depths of my stomach is best done with a closed mouth so as not to upset anybody nearby.

For some reason the good Lord has placed me next to one of Americas finest. A young man called Rick, or prick, or something. Anyway all through the first three levels all I can hear is this guy telling all around him how good he is, how crap we are etc. etc. I live to meet this type of person. I lull them into a false sense of security, do my I am a very weak player act (of course you all know it is not an act but you have to promise not to tell anybody else) and let him walk into my full house for 100% of my chip stack and about 75% of his.

He sits down for the first time keeping very quiet. A tinge of red on the cheeks and neck show his embarrasment at the way he played the hand which involved no skill from me. Having stacked his chips in front of me. I sat back in my chair, gave him a diffident look and issued the ultimate put down, I said


Sorry.

Never used it before or since

you used it in wallsall bb

[Snatiramas]

I don't generally like too much chatting at the table and laughing is definitely a no no. I think on occassion I may have made the occassional remark but in honesty they were all time and place specific in a sort of " you had to be there"  way.

Only one event stays fresh in the memory.

In 2006 I managed by a string of fortuitous circumstances to find myself playing in Vegas. It had been a good trip and I was a little up having played a few sit n gos and managing a cash in one tournament. It was towards the end of the trip and I was playing at the Mirage in a sit n go. I liked the Mirage as it reminded me of the old Grosvenor Luton. Very cramped but a good atmosphere. Also the Carnegie Deli was a very short trundle away. Having just packed away one of their sandwiches, and I recommend you try one to understand the true meaning of the word waste, I am sitting at the table burping quietly away to myself. The gentle waft of saltbeef being dragged up from the depths of my stomach is best done with a closed mouth so as not to upset anybody nearby.

For some reason the good Lord has placed me next to one of Americas finest. A young man called Rick, or prick, or something. Anyway all through the first three levels all I can hear is this guy telling all around him how good he is, how crap we are etc. etc. I live to meet this type of person. I lull them into a false sense of security, do my I am a very weak player act (of course you all know it is not an act but you have to promise not to tell anybody else) and let him walk into my full house for 100% of my chip stack and about 75% of his.

He sits down for the first time keeping very quiet. A tinge of red on the cheeks and neck show his embarrasment at the way he played the hand which involved no skill from me. Having stacked his chips in front of me. I sat back in my chair, gave him a diffident look and issued the ultimate put down, I said


Sorry.

Never used it before or since

you used it in wallsall bb

and you said you were pissed

[vinni]

I once sent a woman on tilt and she wasn't even playing .
me and colchester was sitting down having a drink with john raab in luton .
he told us his missus was coming in a bit ,when she walked in she had a eastern looking women with her ,
any way john got the drinks in (theres a first time for everything ), so we all got chatting .
after about an hour and the Brandy's going down well ,i asked the women how long she had had her lip pierced .
her reply had me and colchester rolling all over the place ,she said it was not a piercing but a mole .

[smileriraq]

sitting at a table with a real know it all  hes been talking a good game all night but really annoying people

flop comes out 7 K 4 spades  and the first small stack first to act goes all in after an age of pondering he folds "im folding a jack  flush draw here"

small stack takes the pot however my cards while folded are still in front of me

I ask "you folded J flush draw on the small stack" thats a good fold

he says "yeah but good players make disciplined folds like that"

I then flip over my mucked cards (mucked preflop) showing the table J 8 spades

he went out shortly after that

[Ironside]

I don't generally like too much chatting at the table and laughing is definitely a no no. I think on occassion I may have made the occassional remark but in honesty they were all time and place specific in a sort of " you had to be there"  way.

Only one event stays fresh in the memory.

In 2006 I managed by a string of fortuitous circumstances to find myself playing in Vegas. It had been a good trip and I was a little up having played a few sit n gos and managing a cash in one tournament. It was towards the end of the trip and I was playing at the Mirage in a sit n go. I liked the Mirage as it reminded me of the old Grosvenor Luton. Very cramped but a good atmosphere. Also the Carnegie Deli was a very short trundle away. Having just packed away one of their sandwiches, and I recommend you try one to understand the true meaning of the word waste, I am sitting at the table burping quietly away to myself. The gentle waft of saltbeef being dragged up from the depths of my stomach is best done with a closed mouth so as not to upset anybody nearby.

For some reason the good Lord has placed me next to one of Americas finest. A young man called Rick, or prick, or something. Anyway all through the first three levels all I can hear is this guy telling all around him how good he is, how crap we are etc. etc. I live to meet this type of person. I lull them into a false sense of security, do my I am a very weak player act (of course you all know it is not an act but you have to promise not to tell anybody else) and let him walk into my full house for 100% of my chip stack and about 75% of his.

He sits down for the first time keeping very quiet. A tinge of red on the cheeks and neck show his embarrasment at the way he played the hand which involved no skill from me. Having stacked his chips in front of me. I sat back in my chair, gave him a diffident look and issued the ultimate put down, I said


Sorry.

Never used it before or since

you used it in wallsall bb

and you said you were pissed

i got a near perfect memory i can still remember the cards