bobAlike
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« on: December 25, 2012, 12:00:18 PM » |
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This thread is dedicated to all the Christmas Cracker Joker writers from around the world who horrify us each and every year.
Here's a couple I had the displeasure of hearing/reading today.
Q. What happened when the wizard turned a naughty boy into a hare? A. He's still rabibiting on about it.
Q. Why did the man with the pony tail go to the doctors? A. He was feeling a little hoarse
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Ah! The element of surprise
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Tal
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« Reply #1 on: December 25, 2012, 01:41:01 PM » |
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I went to the local market and got a job lot for about 10p each.
First one says...
What lies at the bottom of the sea and quivers? A woolly jumper
Bloody discount crackers...
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"You must take your opponent into a deep, dark forest, where 2+2=5, and the path leading out is only wide enough for one"
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pokerfan
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« Reply #2 on: December 25, 2012, 03:22:21 PM » |
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Q. Who conquered half the world, laying eggs along the way ?
A. Attila the hen.
Q. What did the tie say to the hat ?
A. You go on ahead and I'll hang around.
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rfgqqabc
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« Reply #3 on: December 25, 2012, 04:25:30 PM » |
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What wobbles and flies?
A jellycopter!
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[21:05:17] Andrew W: you wasted a non spelling mistakepost? [21:11:08] Patrick Leonard: oll
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Tal
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« Reply #4 on: December 25, 2012, 04:55:37 PM » |
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Actual one:
What time is it when an elephant sits on your TV?
Time to get a new TV
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"You must take your opponent into a deep, dark forest, where 2+2=5, and the path leading out is only wide enough for one"
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Waz1892
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« Reply #5 on: December 25, 2012, 05:36:04 PM » |
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What did Father Christmas say to Mrs Christmas as he stared out of the window....
"Looks like reindeer"
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Carpe Diem
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bobAlike
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« Reply #6 on: December 25, 2012, 05:42:53 PM » |
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Doctor, doctor, I fell like a Christmas bell.
Well take these pills and if they don't work give me a ring.
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Ah! The element of surprise
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pokerfan
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« Reply #7 on: December 25, 2012, 05:49:43 PM » |
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What do you get if you cross a pig and a centipede ?
Bacon and legs.
That might just be the greatest, saw it posted on twitter.
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bobAlike
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« Reply #8 on: December 25, 2012, 05:59:07 PM » |
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That has no place here. Too good.
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Ah! The element of surprise
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Tal
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« Reply #9 on: December 25, 2012, 06:09:50 PM » |
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What did Cinderella say when her photos didn’t arrive on time?
One day my prints will come.
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"You must take your opponent into a deep, dark forest, where 2+2=5, and the path leading out is only wide enough for one"
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smashedagain
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« Reply #10 on: December 25, 2012, 06:24:44 PM » |
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Which of the Christmas foods can't you trust?
The min spies
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[ ] ept title [ ] wpt title [ ] wsop braclet [X] mickey mouse hoodies
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david3103
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« Reply #11 on: December 25, 2012, 07:55:33 PM » |
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Why does an elephant have four feet?
He'd look really silly with four inches
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It's more about the winning than the winnings
5 November 2012 - Kinboshi says "Best post ever on blonde thumbs up"
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smashedagain
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« Reply #12 on: December 25, 2012, 08:11:24 PM » |
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Why does an elephant have four feet?
He'd look really silly with four inches
lol. That's never come out of a cracker
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[ ] ept title [ ] wpt title [ ] wsop braclet [X] mickey mouse hoodies
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bobAlike
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« Reply #13 on: December 25, 2012, 08:55:27 PM » |
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Did you hear about the cross-eyed head master?
He couldn't control his pupils.
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Ah! The element of surprise
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david3103
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« Reply #14 on: December 25, 2012, 09:13:39 PM » |
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Why does an elephant have four feet?
He'd look really silly with four inches
lol. That's never come out of a cracker No, but on my Mother's life I read it first on an ice-lolly stick.
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It's more about the winning than the winnings
5 November 2012 - Kinboshi says "Best post ever on blonde thumbs up"
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