Im still alive

[Colchester Kev]

Hello everyone, just a quick one to let you know that im not deserting my post lol.... Ironside all i can say is GET A PASSPORT!! the women out here wear hardly any clothes 

I will post a lengthy report later not just about poker , but about all the other stuff going on here   im off to the palms now with grumpy bollox ...chubbs is staying in bed cos we overdid the Jack Daniels last night...allthough i refuse to admit that it is possible to overdo JD.

See ya soon
Kev.

[ifm]

Hello mate, hope your behaving.
Good luck tonight and i look forward to reading your reports,
Ian

[tikay]

This we MUST read. Come on Kev, fill us in.

[ariston]

Details kev details. Apparantley john wasnt happy with winning the bellagio event so off they all trotted to the palms where he precided to chop the event there with his life partner chubbs!! Anyone who is travelling out this week who would see fit to take a big box of tetley teabags (round not posh drawstrings or anything) over with them will get a huge drink from john- poor lads desperate for a brew and forgot teabags. I know some forumite will be going in next day or 2 so come on guys help "the daddy" (sorry tikay your the grandfather) of the forum out. Anyone willing to take these with them please email me and I will get him to meet you somewhere out there.

[tikay]

Will they never leave me alone.....?

But John & Chubby chopping a comp - the Yanks have never seen such a duo!

[DTD-Nick.W]

Get all the gosip Kev,
Chubbs in bed OD on JD Nice
About those clothes how much exactly? where you guys staying?
Are you gonna play the blonde tourn on thurs ? it would be good to see you there!

If John aint got any T by next thurs i will oblige.

[Colchester Kev]

Greetings from a bedroom on the 17th floor of the Orleans hotel, we have just got back from Palms casino where john played the $200 (1 rebuy) comp and AGAIN made a final table appearance...eventually going out in 8th when with a relatively small stack his Ace 10 ran into KK and flop brought an ace and a king so team Burnley exit with another visit to the cashier to collect a bit of american folding

Now to the interesting stuff lol....... No Names will be mentioned in this thread as i am a firm believer in the old addage "what happens on tour stays on tour (although i am open to bribery !!!

Firstly, it is hard to explain just how amazing this place is, I could describe in great detail all aspects of Vegas ExCEPT the sheer bloody size of the place, awesome, just awesome ..but what is probably of more interest to you lot is the fact that I have undertaken , at great personal risk to my health, and purely as research for future Blondite visitors to this heavenly place, a survey of all the cocktail waitresses,together with a detailed description of what they are (or in most cases NOT) wearing .....I hope to take pics, but wont be able to post them til i gt home as i dont have my card reader here.
Starting with the Orleans, the girls here wear a sort of leotard effort which is a velvetty type of material...(well it felt like velvet to me ) which leaves very little to the imagination....NICE ...7/10
Next comes the Bellagio...where the girls wear cheerleader type outfits, and although the skirts are short, i cant help feeling that the jumper type tops they wear detract from what could be quite appealing, nice looking girls though 6/10
,The Rio, which is staging the WSOP has its girls dressed in typically short flimsy attire which seems to be worn back to front as you can clearly see their knicers aqt the front but the bum is covered..and i dont say that like it is a bad thing,generally very sexy ladies and they geta 7/10
finally (for now) The Palms ...absolutely stunning, the girls are stunning, and the uniform it consists of knee high pvc very very shiny boots and a skirt made fron pvc that is so short its almost obscene (again, please dont assume that i say thast like its a bad thing ) and a corset type bodice MMmmmmm9/10

I will continue my quest (purely for research purposes later in the week)

I am meeting some fantastic people over here, Ysterday i saw Chris "jesus" Ferguson..phil ivey..and negreanu.
all the hendon mob, devilfish,Simon Trumper, roy the boy brindley, padraig parkinson and jesse may, dave colclough, mickey wernick, he arrived today at 5pm and was sat at a poker table by 7pm..now thats dedication and devotion to the sport. richard gryko. paul maxfield and john law (what a smashing fella)..in fact the only dipsticks i have seen are the young yanks who have been to the Helmuth school of poker , having a big tantrum when they go all in and get outdrawn .. tossers !!

I woul do the lap dancing review, but i am so tired im gonna have to go....so please accept my apologies for the spelling and punctuation etc  but rest assured report will be forthcoming .

Take care all
Kev

[RED-DOG]

Kev, glad to see your ok, was beginning to worry. I didnt realise just how tough life was out there, but you seem to be making the best of it (not one to complain our Kev)

We miss your sparkling wit and repartee on the fourm, you will be glad to hear that we have had a flood  of new members signing up since youve been gone

Try to soldier on as best you can under those conditions, post often, keep yourself pure, and change your underwear every three days, weather you need to or not.

Remember, if your not in bed by 1am...go back to your hotel

Look forward to hearing from you soon

Your jealous mate

RED

 

[redsimon]

,,,,A bit different to the cocktail waitresses at Binions who were all at least 65

(I know what you mean about the Orleans though, very nice!)

[I KNOW IT]

Why is life so unfair, Im not flying out till tomorrow.
Suppose ill have to grin an bear it for another 24hrs though.

What I noticed last year ,was there seems to be a lot of single girls out there, hanging around the bars
just waiting to talk to someone.Ahh
Well I bet it beats listening to the WORMS badbeat stories.
.

[londonpokergirl]

Good luck out there chaps

If you want a good cup of tea, go to Excalibur (sherwood cafe)   i had a marvellous cup of tea there

Mel

[Colchester Kev]

do they sell tea here ? Burnley john is gagging for a good brew... personally i think it would be rude to drink tea out here because of the abundance of gorgeous women wanting to bring me Jack daniels

Red Dog, I am trying my best to cope, but i am a bit depressed today, we were watching a bit of the yanks coverage of wimbledon today, and it looked sunny...we all wanted it to be cold and raining while we are ssuffering 100 degree heat

saw vicky coren and neil channing today the brit contingent is ever growing, cant wait til more of the blondites get here.

Tomorrows plans are to watch John and Simon and all in the 2500 no limit game ....hopefully i wont be able to watch the proffessional boxing that is on in our hotel because the lads will still be in the comp, but if not thats the plan...well you cant go to the titty bar every night can you ...that would just be greedy

Best wishes from Vegas
Kev.
ps. are all these new members jocks ? surely every sweaty with enough brains to use a pc has registered by now

[Colchester Kev]

just another quick ps ..... if any of you guys are coming over and want to meet up, come to the poker room at the palms for the 7pm tourneys i will be there sweating john, simon and rob ..its on every night and we are usually there, i will be the fat bloke with a wonky eye and cropped hair with the penalty spot at the back , i will be also be easily recognised by the fact that i will be drinking JD or eating a large ben and jerrys ice cream, or more probably both  

[Yogi-Bear]

I thought they did a Jack Daniels Ice Cream.

Or was that just another of those brilliant ideas i have just before it's released to the general public.

Yogi

[Colchester Kev]

what would work is a Jack daniels ice cream, served in a cup covered in pictures of the waitresses at the palms ....hmmmmm  whats the number for the patents office

I played in a $100 freezeout at the palms tonight, busted out 22nd, button raised my big blind so i pushed all in with AJ suited, he counted his chips and if he calls me it leaves him with 400 chips..blinds were 200 400, he dwells up then announces "I WILL STILL HAVE CHIPS IF I CALL...SO I WILL"  then procedes to turn over Q7 off  , needless to say he hits a 7 and i wish everybody good luck and make a dignified exit from the table ...it isnt hard to walk away with a bit of dignity and good manners, even though you are really pissed off inside...SO WHY CANT EVERYONE !!!!  I cant stand the whingers and table bangers, ok so you might get a bad beat or get outdrawn, but why cant these tossers just remember the times when they have outdrawn or inflicted a bad beat on someone else....i wish it would stop. 

Anyway during the comp, i was left rather red faced when i was awoken from my daydream by the female dealer saying to me ...."sir its on you, or would you rather we all wait until the waitress is completely through the doors and out of view"  this lead to much laughter and debate on the waitresses , and i have been given a few tips by some of the guys on my table , as to which casino's to go to in order to extend my research into the "uniforms of the cocktail waitresses" book.