I love the fact that we now have 24 hour supermarkets in this country, no more going shopping with the masses for me ...no sirreeee !! I absolutely detest going shopping, I really do... but it is quite relaxing to wander around at silly O'clock in the morning without being ankle bashed by 3 tonnes of laden down shopping trolley, not having to listen to screaming kids , and not having to queue for an eternity to pay for your purchases ...
Dont get me started on queueing in supermarkets ... 497 tills and only 4 ever in use ... It really knobs me off to have to queue for the privelidge of handing over cash... and then there is the queue at the ciggy/lotto counter ... 1 till and one assistant who clearly hates her job and looks at you like you have just asked if you could pop round her house and crap in her pillowcase when you ask for a couple of cartons of ciggy's that are not within reach, and she has to get off her fat arse and walk two paces to fetch them off the shelf.
Anyway, I digress ... whilst wandering around in the early hours of this morning, i notice a shelf full of DVD's at the rather tempting price of 97p ... it was the usual fodder of naff cartoons and obscure never heard of movies.. Then i catch a glimpse of the cover of one called "The last bet"...the tag line was (remember, you have to read this in a really deep voice ) "when all you know is gambling, would you lay your life on the line ? It could very well be ... The last bet" hmmm never heard of it, but that fella from LA Law is in it, you know the quite good looking mexican chap, and John Turturro (The big Lebowski,quiz show) ....
In the trolley it goes along with a single duvet (at £4.97, its cheaper to buy new ones than get them cleaned
) ... usual junk food, 12 cans of diet coke and lime ...they have stopped doing the diet coke and lemon now.. bloody typical, i liked that better. And off i pop to the till quite looking forward to getting home, unpacking the shopping, pouring myself a rather generously sized Jack Daniels and Ginger ale (Tall glass lots of ice) and settle down to watch my newly purchased bargain DVD.
Well you cant go wrong for 97p can you ?? YES YOU CAN .... what a friggin waste of 97 pence, It has to be the worst film ever made, Now i wasnt expecting Oscar winning material, after all i had never heard of the film ... I now realise why!! absolutely shocking .. avoid avoid avoid .... put 3p towards the 97p and buy a scratch card, a lotto ticket, or the big bloody issue... Just dont buy this film.
PS......... If you do decide to spend the quid on a scratch card or a lotto ticket, dont go to Tesco at Hythe Quay in Colchester ... to get at the scratch cards Big Bertha has to shift her lardy arse off her chair, and one of her looks could lead to a lifetime of nightmares and counselling ...
Happy shopping
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