Football Jokes

[Horneris]

Manchester City manager Stuart Pearce gets a letter from a teenage Iraqi boy begging for a trial. He invites him over from bomb blitzed Baghdad, and gives him a run out for the reserves against the first team. The young Iraqi runs rings round the first team defence on his way to a superb hat-trick and Pearce decides to sign him.

The boy asks if he can speak to his parents first, and the manager hands him his mobile.

"Mamma, i've just scored a hat trick in my trial and Manchester City want to sign me" he says, hardly able to contain his excitement. He then realises his mother is crying. "Whats the matter Mamma?" he asks. "Why are you crying?"

"Today has been the worst day of our lives" she says.
"Even worse than when Bush was raining his bombs down on us. You're father has been shot, you'rs sister kidnapped, and the house ransacked and burned!"

"Im so sorry Mamma, i should never have left you. I just so wanted to do well in this trial in Manchester"

"I know son", she replies. "But why did you have to bring us with you?"

[Colchester Kev]

The Post Office have announced that they have had to recall the new Arsenal comemorative stamps ...... People were confused over which side to spit on.

[77dave]

michael jackson has just signed for liverpool

the prospect of being spanked by 11 kids every week was to much to turn down

[LeKnave]

The Post Office have announced that they have had to recall the new Arsenal comemorative stamps ...... People were confused over which side to spit on.

 

[ChipRich]

haha comedy, Horneris i like it

Love the Michael Jackson one tho

[Tinsel Town]

What's the difference between a Black Cab and Liverpool??


A Black Cab only lets in Five!!!

 

[pokerram]

A very old man with a terminal illness who was a Rams fan for 80 yrs called me to his bed. Steve son go and get me a red scum shirt(forest).I started crying but yuve been a rams all these yrs why change now. To which he replied better one of the red scum go than one of us stevie lad.