Vegas & The Aftermath - Diary

[tikay]

Is there any left for the WSOP stake?

I'll take 2% if available.

Ooh, lovely job, we have Mr Camel on board, thanks Keith.

More follows shortly, been an interesting few days, it's kinda tough pushing string uphill.

Do I get coaching from you as part of the deal, Mr H?

I hear young Jake was sort of Guest of Honour at Brighton recently. Got any photos of the proud lad and Dad?

Couldn't work out how to put photos on here, so added some pics on FB

He was the "captain's escort" no less :-)

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10153412809527041&set=pcb.10153412810837041&type=3

Thanks Keith, but I cannot see those photos, as I don't have Facebook.

If someone could copy them & upload here, I'd be most grateful.

[tikay]

My train is currently in a non-moving mode, we have been stationary at a place called Corby Glen for some time.  Note "stationary" not "stationery", which is a vey different thing. How on earth do newcomers to the UK from non-English speaking countries ever learn these things?

Anyway, a PA announcement informs us......

Apologies for the current delay. The train in front is stopped, & is blocking the line, & it cannot move until it's train alarm has been reset. It's alarm was set off when it collided at high speed with a pheasant.


No word on the condition of the pheasant.

[redsimon]

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[tikay]

More breaking news.

The train in front is damaged, Mr Guard informs us, such that it will be forced to limp slowly into Grantham where it will terminate.

Think we can assume the pheasant was also terminated. Score draw seems fair.

[tikay]

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Nice work Simon, thank you.

Oh my Keith, how he has grown. Presumably he is walking now. Last time I saw him I'm pretty sure he had yet to master locomotion. That would have either been in Deauville or Las Vegas, I cannot quite recall.   

Bet you are one of those incredibly proud Dads.

During Leicester's game with West Ham, with that fine West Ham team 2-1 ahead, & looking likely to win, the Sky Sports cameras picked out a young boy in the stands, sat next to his Mum. The boy would have been about Jake's ago, perhaps a touch older.

And he was in floods of tears, sobbing. I'd say that was a little ott, & he may need to learn a little about perspective as he grows up, but fair enough in a kid I suppose.

But here's the thing.

The boy had his head on his Mum's lap, & his Mum was stroking his head. You know, like we stroke a dog. 

I must be careful what I say to proud parents about how they treat their children, so I'd best not ask if you stroke Jake when QPR lose.  (Or is he now a Brighton fan?).

It was, to me, a sickening image. God knows how the boy will turn out, but maybe he'll be OK despite his Mum.

[tikay]

I rather enjoyed this photo which appeared earlier this week as part of a Promo for new Postage Stamps.

It's very reassuring that our Monarchy is in good hands, & so we can rest easy at nights & not have to worry. That especially applies to our Scottish subsidiary.

[The Camel]

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Nice work Simon, thank you.

Oh my Keith, how he has grown. Presumably he is walking now. Last time I saw him I'm pretty sure he had yet to master locomotion. That would have either been in Deauville or Las Vegas, I cannot quite recall.   

Bet you are one of those incredibly proud Dads.

During Leicester's game with West Ham, with that fine West Ham team 2-1 ahead, & looking likely to win, the Sky Sports cameras picked out a young boy in the stands, sat next to his Mum. The boy would have been about Jake's ago, perhaps a touch older.

And he was in floods of tears, sobbing. I'd say that was a little ott, & he may need to learn a little about perspective as he grows up, but fair enough in a kid I suppose.

But here's the thing.

The boy had his head on his Mum's lap, & his Mum was stroking his head. You know, like we stroke a dog. 

I must be careful what I say to proud parents about how they treat their children, so I'd best not ask if you stroke Jake when QPR lose.  (Or is he now a Brighton fan?).

It was, to me, a sickening image. God knows how the boy will turn out, but maybe he'll be OK despite his Mum.

I did see that image you refer to, I think "sickening" is a little over the top, but I did wonder how the kid would react if, God forbid, something really bad happened in his life.

Immediately I thought of this poem (sorry for dragging the dark arts into your diary)

'This be the verse'

They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another's throats.

Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don't have any kids yourself.

Philip Larkin

I think after the experience he had at the Amex, Jake is very likely to become a Brighton fan. For the best really, I predict a much brighter 50 years hence for the Seagulls than for QPR.

[tikay]

I spent a working evening with David May, the retired footballer, on Tuesday.

He was a member of one of he very good Man U sides in the 90's, & had previously been at Blackburn Rovers just prior to them winning the League.

I suppose, relatively, he's not exactly an A-list Celeb, but I really enjoy meeting these guys, I get a bit starstruck.

The best time is in the so-called Green Room, before the Show, where we gather to help settle their nerves, & get to know them a little better, break the ice.

He was immensely interesting, & we got to hear some delish but unrepeatable stories about Sir Alex Ferguson, Beckham, Giggs, Cantona, & so on. 

Of course, in the manner of all footballers, he used the "y" rule. Giggsy, Brucey, Incey, etc. So we fell in line & addressed him as Maysy all evening.

I was helpfully reminded in advance by Mr Tal that Maysy had scored the Man U goal on that fateful night at Crystal Palace when Eric Cantona delivered the kung-fu kick to a spectator, so that was a wonderful discussion topic. It seems that Sir Alex gave favourable treatment to Cantona in most matters, & after the game, Sir Alex just said to Eric, "you can't really be doing that sort of thing Eric." Quite so. Eric ended up with a 6 month ban, of course.

Maysy really was a fun guest. We were a little worried in the Green Room, as he was swearing like a good 'un, effing & blinding every other word, but he was fine when we went on air. Loves a bet, too - he had a 5 match Acca on Tuesday, & was constantly checking the scores throughout the Show.

Maybe we'll get a bigger budget soon, & we can get some modern day greats on - Arsene Wenger, Alan Pardew, etc., - but I really enjoyed meeting David.




 

[Marky147]

'Can't really be doing that sort of thing'

Made me chuckle

[tikay]

There was one rather awkward moment during the Live Show on Sky Sports.

We discussed, in the Green Room, his falling out with Man U after he criticised David Moyes on MUTV, & said he deserved the sack. He works for MUTV, & has various club roles & duties - Man U tend to look after ex players, treat them as family, but they did not like that one bit & he was off the roster. After some healing time, he was reinstated, & was more circumspect subsequently.

Mid-Show, Richard Orford, bless him, suddenly says to Maysy.....

So what about Louis van Gall, he's got to go, right, he's not anything like good enough, is he?

And Maysy sort of spluttered, & ummed & arred...

Well, you know, it's not an easy role....Club in transition.....but, umm, well, err yes, tough job that.

We hear you Brian.

 

 

[tikay]

'Can't really be doing that sort of thing'

Made me chuckle

I thought that was incred. So understated.

Maysy told another Cantona/SAF tale.

There was a club function, big charity do somewhere, & one player, I forgot who, turned up in a flowery shirt, & no tie, instead of the regulation lounge suit, shirt & tie. And SAF bellowed across the room.....

"...who the fu** do you think you are, turning up dressed like that? - we are Manchester United Football Club, we set standards. Don't EVER turn up like that again. Now go home & get changed".

Minutes later, in strolls Cantona. Baseball cap on backwards, random shirt with the collar turned up, track suit bottoms & trainers.

Hi Eric, glad you could make it, lets go get a drink mate..... 


And that was the constant theme - Cantona was managed on a long rein.

Amazing really, to think they paid just £1 milly (?) for him from Leeds. 

[Marky147]

Like it or not, I think that's par for the course in most walks of life.

He certainly has to be up there with the greatest bargains in football.

[hhyftrftdr]

Tonight, ITV, 9pm.....Flying Scotsman With Robson Green. Riveting stuff I'm sure.

Keep him away from the wife to be though.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/04/17/robson-green-runs-off-with-vicars-wife-as-clergyman-says-he-has/

[tikay]

Tonight, ITV, 9pm.....Flying Scotsman With Robson Green. Riveting stuff I'm sure.

Keep him away from the wife to be though.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/04/17/robson-green-runs-off-with-vicars-wife-as-clergyman-says-he-has/

Thanks Hhy, though I'm not a huge "Flying Scotsman" fan. Lot of hype, there.

I do hope you caught the Show a few nights earlier on the crucial role that the diesel engine plays in modern life, how it was invented & developed?

Breath taking TV, it really was, kept me awake half the night just thinking about it.

That's the sort of stuff TV was invented for. God knows where Mrs Brown's Boys & all that shite fits into the equation.

[tikay]

Quite like to admire, often with some envy, at the homes, mansions & estates of the super-rich celebs.

As such, I was a little taken aback to see the home of "Prince" (as in TAFKAP at one time), where, sadly, he died this week.

Most odd looking, as these things go, & not in the least bit attractive.