Ok so here we go hold tight for certain points of the following are not for the poker squeamish...
Evening $180 and we have our usual mix of characters old man America, internet shades boy and middle age mum from some god awful backwater that still drink from ditches...
Anyway I decide im going to play tight and not get involved or bluff the unbluffable..i.e any one remotely American.I dont play a hand for 2 rounds and pick up 8 8 in the middle unraised...I jack it up to 350 ( Blinds 50-100 ) and big up internet boy in the SB and the BB...flop is 9 3 2 rainbow and quick, as a flash internet boy shoves his remaining 1700 into the pot...its an over bet and so fast the felt has burn marks...BB folds and im looking at internet boy who looks like his trapped his doo da in his zip.
Im just totally confused ..it looks like a big ace panic shove or 5 5 6 6? the flop is good for 88 but what the hell is going on here...anyway i duly call and wonder boy flips over 9 10 o/s....sigh...another great pre flop call out of position and then shove when u hit a piece.Ok i think thats fine ive still got half a stack.Then this old guy goes on a raising rampage 4times in a row and nobody standing up to him.his stereo typical american any ace and on his 5th raise i find A J in the SB...ok time to stop this guy..blinds are still 50-100 and he keeps jacking it up 500...i make it 1500 to go and the 1200 behind it is following no matter what. I suppose i shouldnt be surprised when he instacalls and the flop comes 632 rainbow..thats good enough for me and i move in on him...he instacalls..christ! dont tell me i found him with a hand..yep he flips over the mighty A 6 o/s and my jaw drops.. Was it my imagination but had he really called a big re raise from a guy who had played 2 hands with A 6 o/s ?? MY night was at an end and wylie coyote thinks his a genius.
At this point my Poker in Las Vegas is at an end tmmr is wednesday and we fly home Thursday so no point in playing the deepstacker tmmr..Ive had a bellyful so shopping and sun tmmr for me...........or so i thought ...Celtic drags me to the satellite tables and convinces me to have one more shot..ok just for old times sake.
I duly win said satellite and were off to the races tmmr....
Wednesday dawns and I check my email...I have an email from my solicitor regarding my ongoing and messy divorce.She informs me my ex wife still wants more court action and its going to cost me £9,000 in costs.....Ding super fecking tilt i'm rampaging round the room waking a confused Celtic with a barrage of expletives that would break a bleep machines heart.
Im still steaming when we sit down for the deep stacker and im going out with all guns blazing and im going to take a few dodgy card playing yanks with me...im in every pot and catch a guy playing a set of Jacks slowly and my Q 9 hearts flushes up on the river and he cant let go...
Then I have a hand you dont need when steaming..Old Tight American guy raises in late position and I know his gotta a hand but im on the button with 6 7 o/s and im going to outplay this sucker no matter what.
The flop comes A J 3 rainbow and he meekly checks it to me...thats a green light and i fire out a big bet..and he calls....ok...the turn is a blank and he checks again..another shell from me....he flats calls..now even in my clouded mind alarm bells are ringing as aces or AK become probable holdings for this guy.
The rivers another Jack and he checks again..now i know its not good play on the info i have received but the devil is within me and another howitzer flys across the felt..the old guy sighs..this is either a slow roll or finally the salvo has suceeded...he then calls and my 7 high is dust..nice hand sir i announce you got me..and i'm keen to see the monster..
He turns overs K K.........fucking HELL!!!! I almost go into orbit..did this guy flat call 3 shells on an Ace high flop with KK...I start ranting at the table about what it would take you people to lay a fucking hand down..it was so funny...the old boy just sat there impassivley as I vented....needless to say this guy wasn't going deep although some lunatic tried to bluff him 3 hands later after seeing this crazyiness.
Anyway im now im on supertilt and i limp mid pack with 10 7 clubs...the guy next to me is gibralter incarnate and raises..he picks up one of the blinds and its back on me...im out of postion with a raggy connector to a rock..so of course i call..the flop is 9 7 3 two clubs...perfecto..i check to the rock who leads at it. SB jumps out of the way and I stick it to the rock with a big reraise....he instantly moves in and I know what his got..unfortunatly for him 14 outs and a head of steam means his getting called...K K is the hand and i club up immediatly for 35K....
I make no apologies and my anger subsides as I suddenly realise i actually have a stack.
I move tables and am one of the big stacks and I begin to focus..i chip up to nearly 50 k and im flying.
Unfortunatley accidents are always just around the corner in no limit and I played a big pot with a youngster floating him on the flop not taking my chance to take the pot to a weak check and letting him hit his card before paying him off..i then had 10 10 when some looney moved in with A 8..Ace at the door..8 8 v AK..king on the turn and finally 9 9 finding aces waiting for me and quick as that it was over..
My final bash was that night but wasnt in the mood by now and my AK found KK waiting....however i did manage to witness possibly the worst call ever..Greasy quiffy American limps under the gun..BB raises quiffy reraises and quick as a flash BB moves in for the Farm, surrounding buildings and 3 acres of prime pasture...Quiffy thinks although i think this is an exaggeration for a couple of seconds and calls...wow i think aces and kings..had to be to call the third raise mega push...BB duly turns over KK...oh oh i think here comes the early limper with aces..yep there was one ace..here it comes an off suit 6 !!!!!!!
Are u Kidding ME!!!!!! Was this guy on some kind psychotic mental health drug?? did he just call a third reraise allin with A 6 o/s
The Ace in the door was sick..I was too busy vomiting to see the Kings not trip up...The guy with the Kings was visibly in shock and I had seen it all.....LOL
And that my friends was that...mucho poker played some of it excellent and some very deep finishes..but no mullah...which was very disappointing as deep stack suits me down to the ground but not winning any races and Americans who clearly have no idea what they are doing done for me but I have enjoyed every single minute and I leave these hallowed shores with battle scars aplenty and new and wonderful stories of characters and play that would make your hair curl....
So I will wrap up on the Poker front with some pictures and summary to follow....
Author