blonde poker forum
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
August 15, 2025, 04:19:40 PM

Login with username, password and session length
Search:     Advanced search
Order through Amazon and help blonde Poker
2262916 Posts in 66616 Topics by 16993 Members
Latest Member: jobinkhosla
* Home Help Arcade Search Calendar Guidelines Login Register
+  blonde poker forum
|-+  Community Forums
| |-+  The Lounge
| | |-+  Sovietsongs 'Tip of the Day'		 0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic. « previous next »
Pages: 1 [2] 3 Go Down Print
Author Topic: Sovietsongs 'Tip of the Day'  (Read 3607 times)
sofa----king
sofa----king
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 3627



View Profile
« Reply #15 on: December 31, 2008, 01:47:35 PM »
dont eat yellow snow.,.,.,
and dont sit down with a lightbulb in your back pocket
Logged
one two buckle my shoe,three four,i wish i had velcro
sovietsong
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 8479



View Profile
« Reply #16 on: December 31, 2008, 01:49:19 PM »
Quote from: Robert HM on December 31, 2008, 12:47:53 PM
Quote from: sovietsong on December 31, 2008, 12:04:57 AM
***when having guests round for tea, ensure the largest of the group does not sit on the weakest chair***

A mistake I made this evening...


my mums ok btw.

Should I feel bad for laughing out loud?

I laughed whilst the rest of my family looked in horror!  It was quite a sight!
Logged
In the category of Funniest Poster I nominate sovietsong. - mantis 21/12/2012
Colchester Kev
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 34178



View Profile
« Reply #17 on: December 31, 2008, 04:27:04 PM »
when queueing at the fag counter with 10 items and the sign says 5 items only at this till ... say to the cashier "I am a psychopathic schizophrenic, 5 items are mine and the other 5 are for my homicidal maniac split personality, I can get him to pay for his own if you like" then grin like Jack Nicholson in "the shining"

You will get served immediately.
Logged
Sleep don't visit, so I choke on sun
And the days blur into one
And the backs of my eyes hum with things I've never done

http://colchesterkev.wordpress.com/


kevshep2010@hotmail.co.uk
Colchester Kev
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 34178



View Profile
« Reply #18 on: December 31, 2008, 04:30:37 PM »
@rsenal fans. Save money on expensive new kits by simply strapping a large fake penis to your forehead. It is now clear to all who you support.
Logged
Sleep don't visit, so I choke on sun
And the days blur into one
And the backs of my eyes hum with things I've never done

http://colchesterkev.wordpress.com/


kevshep2010@hotmail.co.uk
Colchester Kev
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 34178



View Profile
« Reply #19 on: December 31, 2008, 04:31:22 PM »
DON'T INVITE DRUG ADDICTS round for a meal on New Years Day, They may find the offer of cold turkey embarrassing or offensive.
Logged
Sleep don't visit, so I choke on sun
And the days blur into one
And the backs of my eyes hum with things I've never done

http://colchesterkev.wordpress.com/


kevshep2010@hotmail.co.uk
TheChipPrince
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 8664



View Profile
« Reply #20 on: December 31, 2008, 05:08:57 PM »
Quote from: Colchester Kev on December 31, 2008, 04:31:22 PM
DON'T INVITE DRUG ADDICTS round for a meal on New Years Day, They may find the offer of cold turkey embarrassing or offensive.

lol @ Kev even beginning to offer out slices of his £37 turkey, he be forcing down their throat, ''eat that, do you know how much it f*cking cost''!!
Logged
The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph.

RIP- TheChipPrince - $17,165
thetank
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 19278



View Profile
« Reply #21 on: January 03, 2009, 12:01:40 PM »
***If you weigh yourself before and after a shite, you can work out how heavy the shite was***

A good tip if you want to know how heavy your shites are, other methods can be messy.
Logged
For super fun to exist, well defined parameters must exist for the super fun to exist within.
sovietsong
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 8479



View Profile
« Reply #22 on: January 03, 2009, 12:07:31 PM »
Quote from: thetank on January 03, 2009, 12:01:40 PM
***If you weigh yourself before and after a shite, you can work out how heavy the shite was***

A good tip if you want to know how heavy your shites are, other methods can be messy.

what about taking into account the weight of the urine?
Logged
In the category of Funniest Poster I nominate sovietsong. - mantis 21/12/2012
thetank
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 19278



View Profile
« Reply #23 on: January 03, 2009, 12:42:44 PM »
Include that in the weight of your shite. makes you feel better.
Logged
For super fun to exist, well defined parameters must exist for the super fun to exist within.
Joobie538
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 1417


..


View Profile
« Reply #24 on: January 04, 2009, 08:51:21 PM »
Tip for anyone feeling a bit down:

Quality street wrappers make great rose tinted covers for glasses.
Logged


The_nun
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 8478


http://www.organdonation.nhs.uk


View Profile
« Reply #25 on: January 04, 2009, 08:55:21 PM »
An empty aluminum cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an inexpensive vibrator.
Logged
http://www.organdonation.nhs.uk
The_nun
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 8478


http://www.organdonation.nhs.uk


View Profile
« Reply #26 on: January 04, 2009, 09:14:53 PM »
Whilst cooking pizza there is no need to turn it over.
« Last Edit: January 04, 2009, 09:22:03 PM by The_nun » Logged
http://www.organdonation.nhs.uk
Joobie538
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 1417


..


View Profile
« Reply #27 on: January 04, 2009, 09:24:32 PM »
Quote from: The_nun on January 04, 2009, 08:55:21 PM
An empty aluminum cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an inexpensive vibrator.


you forgot to add * make sure the lid is secure before using.

could be a rather embarrassing trip to casualty!
Logged


The_nun
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 8478


http://www.organdonation.nhs.uk


View Profile
« Reply #28 on: January 04, 2009, 09:26:05 PM »
Nah, live dangerously for once.  Wink
Logged
http://www.organdonation.nhs.uk
Joobie538
Hero Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 1417


..


View Profile
« Reply #29 on: February 03, 2009, 11:51:13 PM »

Always.....I mean ALWAYS, remember to tie your hair back when epilating your legs!!! 

Logged


Pages: 1 [2] 3 Go Up Print 
« previous next »
Jump to:  

Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2015, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!
Page created in 0.071 seconds with 20 queries.