what an idiot

[byronkincaid]

OAP's who troll the internet need a good slap imo

Click to see full-size image.

[trafficjam]

What a terrible tale.

1) Shoot the teacher.

hell yeah

2) Hope the kid gets better - & behaves properly in futuure.

let's hope so

3) Shoot the kids parents. They probz gave him whatever he wanted because "well, he wanted it". Which is apparently what parents do these days, totally oblivious to the irony, & not knowing the difference between two simple 4 letter words - "want" & "need".

now you're just getting trigger happy

Make no mistake - the problem begins with piss-poor Parenting. Kids need a good slap now & then, from their Parents, & saying "no" now & then helps, which seems to be a difficult word for many Parents. It's sheer child cruelty to spoil kids by giving them what they want, "because they want it", it just stores up problems for when the kid grows up.

You have to solve the root of the problem, & bad parenting is the root cause of poorly-behaved kids. Since when were kids so precious they could not be given a slap, or told "no, you can't"? Since the Country went soft, that's when.

 

   

A parent can be firm without smacking though.  My mother was a WWW2 widow and left with four of us under the  age of 8.  She never ever took her hand to us, her face and control of us were enough.  We grew up without a father figure and we were all well behaved kids at school and out.

I agree it is the parenting

[barhell]

I wish my daughter would listen to reason she still has inquisitive fingers at 10 years old and has to touch everything and anything,

Would giving her a smack stop that though?  When I was around the same age I remember sitting in my bedroom sucking on a live electrical lead because I liked the buzzy feeling on my tongue. Once it took hold and I got an electric shock, I didn't do it again.  

Bolt, in your examples you've highlighted where potentialy dangerous situations existed.  Surely the best way to deal with those situations would have been to make the window secure and remove the dangerous cabinet, or otherwise make it safe?

Of course we can't wrap our kids in cotton wool and accidents will happen, but if we see a potential danger where a child could get hurt, surely removing it is the way forward, not smacking them as some kind of punisment for their natural inquisitiveness.

This has gone off tangent a bit again because I believe Tikay's earlier comments about children needing a good slap were not really aimed at toddlers needing to keep out of danger anyway.

I wasn't questioning wether a smack would stop her it was more just pointing out that explaining things reasonably to some children just isn't going to work i have 2 girls 13 and 10 in age and they are chalk and cheese and whats worked for one in the past misses the younger one totally, beautiful girl she is and loving but my god she knows how to push all the wrong buttons.
 

[ScottMGee]

of course it's difficult, you cant keep your eye on a 2/3 year old 24/7,

+ 1

Aged 4, I took my Dad's spare car keys from his bedroom drawer and started reversing his Daf 55 automatic out of the drive - luckily my parents heard the car start up and managed to stop me before I got onto the road.

[cia260895]

What makes:

a) a good parent

b) a bad parent

?

[Cf]

Of course we can't wrap our kids in cotton wool and accidents will happen, but if we see a potential danger where a child could get hurt, surely removing it is the way forward, not smacking them as some kind of punisment for their natural inquisitiveness.

A child walks up to a fire and decides it would be fun to put its hand in it. One burn later, and a lot of pain, and we can now be quite happy that the child is never going to do that again. The child now realises that fire + hand in it = pain.

Smacking children is a natural extension to this, where the situation is bad, but has no natural pain mechanism, or a bigger danger we wish to avoid.

My parents smacked me when I misbehaved. The result is you don't want to misbehave because you know you'll get a smack and this hurts. This isn't living in fear of my parents or anything daft like that, it's simply a natural defence mechanism.

Just checked the wikipedia definition of pain, and in the opening section it has: "Pain is part of the body's defense system, triggering a reflex reaction to retract from a painful stimulus, and helps adjust behavior to increase avoidance of that particular harmful situation in the future."

Obviously there's a line to how far parents should be able to go. A hard smack that hurts for a while is fine. Being hit with the poker and having a lasting scar like my uncle is obviously going too far.

[steeveg]

nothing wrong in a little smack as long as it is used sparingly,  kids will feel emotionally hurt as well as feel a little pain but they will also realize for their own good they have done something far worse than just being a little naughty, the more you smack and scream at a child the more they will think its you not them, there is a big difference between slapping kids to make them stop doing things that annoy you and a little slap to make them understand they have done somthing which is very wrong

[roscopiko]

Interesting thread this one and as a newish parent quite enlightening.

Imo the biggest impact on social behaviour over the last 60 years is the massive trend towards having 2 working parents in every family and the reduction that has on quality family time received from by kids for a young age.  Kids are palmed off to nurserys or other places for their care where, while it can of a good standard, they are by law simply not allowed to instil any level of discipline.

Surely this then changes the whole trust/respect relationship which declines as the parents are no longer the main care givers or role models to their own children and parents overcompensate on the reward side through the personal guilt of not providing the care.

Solved

[steeveg]

Interesting thread this one and as a newish parent quite enlightening.

Imo the biggest impact on social behaviour over the last 60 years is the massive trend towards having 2 working parents in every family and the reduction that has on quality family time received from by kids for a young age.  Kids are palmed off to nurserys or other places for their care where, while it can of a good standard, they are by law simply not allowed to instil any level of discipline.

Surely this then changes the whole trust/respect relationship which declines as the parents are no longer the main care givers or role models to their own children and parents overcompensate on the reward side through the personal guilt of not providing the care.

Solved

yes i think this accepted by most people as fact but having 1 parent at home all day wouldnt solve the problem what do you do to a child when he has done something dangerous to himself or others and how do you teach a child very bad behaviour to others wont be tollerated.

[roscopiko]

yes i think this accepted by most people as fact but having 1 parent at home all day wouldnt solve the problem what do you do to a child when he has done something dangerous to himself or others.

Well in a lot of way I think it does.

If you as a parent know your child then you know to a greater extent what action you need to take.  Ideally I would see smacking as the absolute last resort once all other avenues have been tried but am definitely not anti smacking as its probably the most effective method of disciplining imo.

[steeveg]

If you as a parent know your child then you know to a greater extent what action you need to take.

I wish i could agree the world would be a far better place to live

[Cf]

yes i think this accepted by most people as fact but having 1 parent at home all day wouldnt solve the problem what do you do to a child when he has done something dangerous to himself or others.

Well in a lot of way I think it does.

If you as a parent know your child then you know to a greater extent what action you need to take.  Ideally I would see smacking as the absolute last resort once all other avenues have been tried but am definitely not anti smacking as its probably the most effective method of disciplining imo.

If it's the most effective method of disiplining then why leave it as a last resort?

[tikay]

OAP's who troll the internet need a good slap imo

Click to see full-size image.

lool.

God Bless byron!

[G1BTW]

yes i think this accepted by most people as fact but having 1 parent at home all day wouldnt solve the problem what do you do to a child when he has done something dangerous to himself or others.

Well in a lot of way I think it does.

If you as a parent know your child then you know to a greater extent what action you need to take.  Ideally I would see smacking as the absolute last resort once all other avenues have been tried but am definitely not anti smacking as its probably the most effective method of disciplining imo.

If it's the most effective method of disiplining then why leave it as a last resort?

+1. Get in quick with a left hook, shuts them right the **** up.

[byronkincaid]

OAP's who troll the internet need a good slap imo

Click to see full-size image.

lool.

God Bless byron!

tut tut, bringing god into it now. you know that's like a



to