O/T Favourite Lyrics

[Colchester Kev]

Just lightening up the thread mug.

Cant whack a bit of Ken Dodd

[Pelham Boy]

Hello Ken etc etc

I went out with a mongol sister's Lesbian friend
I was on Crackerjack at the age of 10
And I saw the Sex Pistols play at the 100 Club
And I spent New Year's Eve at Sensible's den

Preposterous Tales - Now then now then
Preposterous Tales - Now then now then
Preposterous Tales in the life of Ken Mackenzie

I lost a £1,000 playing brag last night
I flew to Amsterdam to start a riot
And I once saw the Palace score 4 goals away from home
and I've won every game of Trivial Pursuit I've ever played

Preposterous Tales - Now then now then
Preposterous Tales - Now then now then
Preposterous Tales in the life of Ken Mackenzie

I once ate 6 mars bar in half an hour - Oh did you Ken
And whilst working on a site I unearthed a bomb - Oh did you Ken
And I once had a shower with two American girls
at the same time Ken?
Naw that's preposterous

Preposterous Tales - Now then now then
Preposterous Tales - Now then now then
Preposterous Tales in the life of Ken Mackenzie

[Pelham Boy]

Welcome to the Den, South-East 14
Do not believe all you see or read
We are not animals, we are human beings
Whose fans only resort to violence
in the face of immense provocation
Nearest station is New Cross Gate
£3.50 to get in and the beer is good

Burndon Park - home of 'Trotters'
The ground stands surrounded by industrial dereliction.
For Bolton is feeling the pinch.
Still the fans have kept their sense of humour.
Despite a recent run of poor results.
Nearest station is Trinity Street.
£3 to get in (because it's 'up north')
and the beer is cold

Craven Cottage, in one corner stands the cottage.
Unique, a reminder of an earlier age,
an age before the violence, before the air was filled with vile oaths
Opposite sits the brash new stand.
Overlooking the Thames, smug, expensive and empty.
There's an electronic scoreboard to gaze at when the play gets dull
which isn't often as Fulham play an attractive brand of football
£4 to get in and the beer is mediocre

Three English Football Grounds

[Pelham Boy]

Tell the viewers at home and tell the kids on the street
And if you've just got in from work, now you're in for a treat
The half-times are up on the screen
There's too many words and too many teams
I can't be bothered to read them all out
So pick your favourites and give them a shout
Incredible, Remarkable, Quite Extraordinary,

There's too many songs about sex these days
Let's get back to familier ways
Let's talk politics and sex but first of all Emlyn
What happened next?

Frank Bough's doing well these days
Since he left Grandstand for higher pay
Breakfast Time, Holiday '88
Paid to party, yeah Frank's doing great
Meanwhile I'm stuck in this rut
Same routine year in year out
It's predictable every summer
Mispronouncing the Kenyan runners
It gets worse in the winter
with the god-damn videprinter
That's Stenhousemuir's 13th game without a scoring draw
Incredible, Remarkable, Quite Extraordinary

Ask any man on any street
and he'll tell you
Maradona's a cheat
His goal had the whole world enticed
If that's the hand of god then I'm Jesus Christ
Incredible, Remarkable, Quite Extraordinary

[booder]

Far from the crazy pavements
...the taste of silver spoons
A clinical arrangement
...on a dirty afternoon
Where the fecal germs of Mr Freud
...are rendered obsolete
The legal term is null and void
in the case of ... Beasley street

In the cheap seats where murder breeds
somebody is out of breath
Sleep is a luxury they don't need
... a sneak preview of death
Belladonna is your flower
Manslaughter is your meat
Spend a year in a couple of hours
on the edge of Beasley street

Where the action isn't
That's where it is
State your position
Vacancies exist
In an X-certificate exercise
Ex-servicemen excrete
Keith Joseph smiles and a baby dies
in a box on Beasley street

From the boarding houses and bedsits full of
...accidents and fleas
Somebody gets it
Where the missing persons freeze
wearing dead men's overcoats
You can't see their feet
A Riff joint shuts - opens up
right down on Beasley street

Cars collide, colours clash
Disaster movie stuff
For the man with the Fu Manchu moustache
revenge is not enough
There's a dead canery on a swivel seat
there's a rainbow on the road
Meanwhile on Beasley Street
silence is the code

Hot beneath the collar
...an inspector call
Where the perishing stink of squalor
...impregnates the walls
The rats have all got rickets
They spit through broken teeth
The name of the game is not cricket
Caught out on ...Beasley Street

The hipster and his hired hat
drive a borrowed car
yellow socks and a pink crevat
nothing la-di-dah
O-A-P
Mother-to-be
Watch the three-piece suite
When shitstopper drains
and crocodile skis
are seen on ...Beasley Street

The kingdom of the blind
...a one-eyed man is king
Beauty problems are redefined
...The doorbells do not ring
A light bulb bursts like a blister
the only form of heat
Where a fellow sells his sister
...down the river on Beasley Street

The boys are on the wagon
The girls are on the shelf
Their commom problem is
...that they're not someone else
The dirt blows out
The dust blows in
You can't keep it neat
It's a fully furnished dustbin
...sixteen Beasley Street

Vince the ageing savage
Betrays no kind of life
...but the smell of yesterday's cabbage
and the ghost of last year's wife
Through a constant haze
of deodorant sprays
He says ...retreat
Alsatians dog the dirty days
Down the middle of Beasley street

People turn to poison
Quick as lager turns to piss
Sweethearts are physically sick
Every time they kiss
It's a sociologist's paradise
Each day repeats
Uneasy, cheasy, greasy, queasy
...beastly, Beasley Street

Eyes dead as vicious fish
Look around for laughs
If I could have just one wish
I would be a photograph
On a permanent monday morning
Get lost or fall asleep
When the yellow cats are yawning
Around the back of Beasley Street

[PocketLady]

There's a chair in my head on which I used to sit
Took a pencil and I wrote the following on it

Now there's a key where my wonderful mouth used to be
Dig it up, throw it at me
Dig it up, throw it at me

Where can I run to, where can I hide
Who will I turn to now I'm in a virgin state of mind

Got a knife to disengage the voids that I can't bear
To cut out words I've got written on my chair

Like do you think I'm sexy
Do you think I really care

Can I burn the mazes I grow
Can I, I don't think so

Can I burn the mazes I grow
Can I, I don't think so

Where can I run to, where can I hide
Who will I turn to now I'm in a virgin state of mind

[action man]

it is only a paper moon
Sailing over a cardboard sea,
But it wouldnt be make believe
If you believed in me.

Say it is only a canvas sky
Hanging over a muslin tree,
But it wouldnt be make believe
If you believed in me.

Without your love,
Its a honky-tonk parade.
Without your love,
Its a melody played in a penny arcade.

Its a barnum and bailey world,
Just as phony as it can be,
But it wouldnt be make believe
If you believed in me.

~interlude~

Without your love,
Its a honky-tonk parade.
Without your love,
Its a melody played in a penny arcade.

Its a barnum and bailey world
Just as phony as it can be,
But it wouldnt be make believe
If you believed in me.

[action man]

Give me a kiss to build a dream on
And my imagination will thrive upon that kiss
Sweetheart, I ask no more than this
A kiss to build a dream on

Give me a kiss before you leave me
And my imagination will feed my hungry heart
Leave me one thing before we part
A kiss to build a dream on

When Im alone with my fancies...Ill be with you
Weaving romances...making believe theyre true

Give me your lips for just a moment
And my imagination will make that moment live
Give me what you alone can give
A kiss to build a dream on

(instrumental break)

When Im alone with my fancies...Ill be with you
Weaving romances...making believe theyre true

Give me a kiss to build a dream on
And my imagination will thrive upon that kiss
Ah sweetheart, I ask no more than this
A kiss to build a dream on

[PocketLady]

Don't write a letter when you want to leave
Don't call me at 3 a.m. from a friend's apartment
I'd like to choose how I hear the news
Take me to a park that's covered with trees
Tell me on a sunday please

Let me down easy
No big song and dance
No long faces, no long looks
No deep conversation
I know the way we should spend that day
Take me to a zoo that's got chimpanzees
Tell me on a sunday please

Don't want to know who's to blame
It won't help knowing
Don't want to fight day and night
Bad enough you're going

Don't leave in silence with no word at all
Don't get drunk and slam the door
That's no way to end this
I know how I want you to say goodbye
Find a circus ring with a flying trapeze
Tell me on a sunday please

Don't want to fight day and night
Bad enough you're going
Don't leave in silence with no word at all
Don't get drunk and slam the door
That's no way to end this
I know how I want you to say goodbye

Don't run off in the pouring rain
Don't call me as they call your plane
Take the hurt out of all the pain
Take me to a park that's covered with trees
Tell me on a sunday please

[PocketLady]

The words have been drained from this pencil
Sweet words that I want to give you
And I can't sleep
I need to tell you
Goodnight

When we're together, I feel perfect
When I'm pulled away from you, I fall apart
All you say is sacred to me
Your eyes are so blue
I can't look away
As we lay in the stillness
You whisper to me

Amy, marry me
Promise you'll stay with me
Oh you don't have to ask me
You know you're all that I live for
You know I'd die just to hold you
Stay with you
Somehow I'll show you
That you are my night sky
I've always been right behind you
Now I'll always be right beside you

So many nights I cried myself to sleep
Now that you love me, I love myself
I never thought I would say this
I never thought there'd be
You

[lazaroonie]

for lyrics ye cannae beat this guy :

http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=yoMLDxl01qk

[Colchester Kev]

for lyrics ye cannae beat this guy :

http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=yoMLDxl01qk

Wow ... Tikay gets about doesnt he !

[Maxriddles]

for lyrics ye cannae beat this guy :

http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=yoMLDxl01qk

   Matt McGinn was awesome. I will point out I'm not old enough to remember him but my parent's record collection certainly was. A lot of Matt's work is on You Tube and it's well worth a listen, he was a very prolific writer whose work could be very profound and/or very funny.

[Pelham Boy]

How you are my hero
how your never here though
remember times when you put me on your shoulders
how i wish it was forever you would hold us
right now im too young to know
how in the future it will affect me when you go
you could have had it all
you, me, and mum y`know
anything was possible

i wont be the lonley one
sitting on my own and sad
a fifty year old
reminiscing what i had

i wont be the lonley one
sitting on my own and sad
forget your dad, he's gone

all i wanted was a kick-a-bout in the park
for you to race me home when it was nearly getting dark
how i could've been yours, and you be mine
it could've been me and you until the end of time
do what you want, when you want
be as fuckin' insincere as you can
what kind of way is that to treat your wife
to see your son on saturdays
what way is that to live your life?

i wont be the lonley one
sitting on my own and sad
a fifty year old
reminiscing what i had

i wont be the lonley one
sitting on my own and sad
forget your dad, he's gone

[nirvana]

Tra la la, la la la la.
Tra la la, la la la la.
Tra la la, la la la la.
Tra la la, la la la la.

One banana, two banana, three banana, four.
Four bananas make a bunch and so do many more.
Over hill and highway the banana buggies go
Comin' on to bring you The Banana Splits Show.

Makin up a mess of fun
Makin up a mess of fun
Lot's of fun for everyone.

Tra la la, la la la la.
Tra la la, la la la la.
Tra la la, la la la la.
Tra la la, la la la la.

Four banana, three banana, two banana, one.
All bananas playing in the bright warm sun.
Flippin like a pancake, poppin like a cork
Fleagle, Bingo, Drooper and Snork.

Tra la la, la la la la.
Tra la la, la la la la.
Tra la la, la la la la.
Tra la la, la la la la.