china mug has left the building

Hello Tom,

I’ve found my way back to this subject after 14 years, and I’ve come to settle a wrong that has been outstanding for far too long - now that I am no longer bound to contractual clauses restricting my right of (further) reply on the subject.

Before I get to the important part - I want to preface my response by getting biographical and just sharing a bit of my experience.

* I joined Grosvenor Luton at 18.
* I did a year or two on the Tables, and then decided I’d agree to learn Poker as well because they needed help and hey, it was the height of the Poker boom and it was the place to be. (So I thought).
* From a career perspective, it was not a great prospect to be in Poker - your trajectory basically stops at running the Poker Room. The management couldn’t really care less about it, and most of them wished it wasn’t there.
* After a succession of failed Card Room Managers/Supervisors - I went to the GM, a 23 year old guy with hardly any experience in anything with a business plan I’d written up on word and said, “I honestly think I can make this work, here’s how I’ll do it and I want you to let me try.”
* Curse him. He gave me the job.

So that roughly gets us to 2011. I can’t remember exactly, I am sad to say, and even the incident in question is extremely hazy to mind. I definitely recall that whatever you said made me snap, and that’s an achievement in and of itself - but there’s not much else there recollection wise.

* Running G Luton was by far the hardest job that I have done, up until this point in my life. Not because it was the most difficult, or taxing - but because of the toxicity.
* In and amongst the group of people that we refer to as “Poker players” are some of the most vitriolic, abusive, unpleasant individuals you could hope to meet.
* This is not reflective of everyone. I met a lot of wonderful people through that journey - and I don’t regret a second of it. It was extremely effective in making me the resilient person that I am today.
* You are treated with contempt by the organisation. You are the least valued, least important people in the building. You get treated the same way by, a sadly significant portion, of the players.
* The hours are extremely long - and I, and others, were working 80+ hour weeks to try and ensure that games were kept open and people could rely on us to never close a game on them.
* I’ve never endured as much abuse, and I’m still working in Casinos, as I did in that job.
* We had a direct competitor that was able to operate in ways that we were prohibited from, and could pay dealers a far better salary - and it was really damn hard trying to keep that place manned for £6 per hour.
* The competitor was also pretty vicious and backhanded in social media - and we were never allowed the right of reply for corporate reasons. I still get annoyed, thinking back on it, that one of the regulars jumped on me at the one opportunity that I made a passive swipe back at them; even though he was probably right that I shouldn’t have stooped to doing it - the inconsistent treatment and expectations were somewhat stifling at times.Players expected the absolute world from you, and crucified you for every single thing that they could.
* Even some of the more reasonable people ended up being extremely horrible by the time that I had enough, and I begged Russell Tamplin to let me move into London because I had reached my limit.

So - I’ve said enough about that. I have a lot of fond memories, and I look back on the good times with a good deal of nostalgia. The bad, well, it was character building at least.

I don’t remember what you did, Tom. I remember that you were capable of boiling my blood with your endless barrage of criticisms, complaints and rude remarks. Not that you were unique in that respect - and it is a common theme for poker players to exploit those that they know cannot retaliate for fear of a repercussion.

People often say that the customer is always right, and it should never happen that a staff member behaves that way to a customer.

What I’ve practiced in my years in this industry since then is that I never allow those kind of customers to become right, because I show them the exit and I have no remorse about it. Albeit without the commentary.

Staff members don’t deserve to be insulted and when the line is clearer and the team members are protected from that kind of abuse - it is much less of a problem.

That being said - it was very much a part of the culture and it would be unfair to say that you were behaving that way because of your inherent character. Honestly, I can’t remember enough to be sure. I recollect that the whole room clapped at your exit - which probably gives some indication of what the collective opinion was.

I was wrong to say what I did, irrespective of whatever the trigger point was. Not because you didn’t deserve it - because quite frankly if you are able to make me snap, then you really must have deserved it - I am the calmest person I know. I was wrong to call you anything because I should have held myself to a higher standard. I should have just asked for the management to ask you to leave (they would have told me to fuck off).

The real reason that I am sorry is because you were not the worst offender, not by a long stretch, and you did not deserve to be embarrassed by me in front of the entire poker room.

And when I think back and try to remember exactly what I remember about Mr. T. M. is that I recall a man who was patient and instructional with me when I was brand new to poker, and was to all other new dealers that joined. A man that would always encourage us to do charity events - and be there to support them. A man that would put his hand in his pocket every time, whenever he heard someone was sick, or was leaving.
And that was a rare thing in that community, and your behaviour otherwise was just typical of the normal culture in that time - if perhaps a bit more effective at getting under my skin than most others.

So yes, I am sorry for what I did, Tom. I do hope you can forgive me.