Adverts you shout at

[Tal]

I had a - conservative estimate - five minute rant while at a poker table at the weekend when this advert came up on a nearby telly:



Was it the annoying music? No

Was it the twee comparison between the people driving to be free and the fish doing the same? No. Well, maybe. But no.

How does a fish go from fresh water to fresh water to fresh water to the flipping sea??!

I love adverts. When done well. This, unless there's some fish I don't know about that can do water with or without salt, is not one of those.

I mean why not have them driving to a big lake and the fish swimming about happily there? Easy.

Anyone else?

[Woodsey]

You're thinking about shit way too hard mate 

[Doobs]

You were OK with the fish jumping those distances?  Or the fact it is clearly a tropical fish, so wouldn't handle the temperature outisde the tank?

[arbboy]

The two ladbrokes adverts have always tilted me into shouting at the tv at them.  I must have seen them combined over 1000 times i reckon.  The first one 'free betttttttttttttttttt!' always made me shout 'layyyyyyyyyyyyyyy a bet you spineless fucks' and the 2nd lolbrokes life advert with the 5 jokers on it just makes me hum the theme tune to the ad.  One of the characters 'Gut Thruster' is the spitting image of Carl Spicer (pro gambler/poker player). 

[Marky147]

ROFL thread!

[Tal]

You were OK with the fish jumping those distances?  Or the fact it is clearly a tropical fish, so wouldn't handle the temperature outisde the tank?

Correct. That would be overthinking.

The fundamental concept of the advert is the fish escapes from its bowl to the sea in order to be free. That is necessarily flawed.

[MintTrav]

How do you reconcile your theory that freshwater fish can't live in the sea with the fact that they survived the Flood?

[teddybloat]

C+P from next door:

i'm not one for tilting usually, but adverts constantly annoy me.

Being patronised must really work on some people, but i just feel like boycotting products on principle. non more so than pepsi max, coke zero and lynx adverts

pepsi max was conceived as men had stopped buying diet coke. now in the late nineties we had two competing male archetypes:

the new lad who swilled beer, sh-gged birds and wore expensive jumpers recommended by sartorial style-bibles like, er, nuts magazine and FHM

 and the new man - a bookish type who can quote byron, cook lasagne and understand feminist issues all while wearing knitware and brogues.

women it was said appreciated the later archetype, while the former was said not to care, being more interested in seeing what trabs tim lovejoy was rocking on soccer am.well the diet coke adverts cut right through those archetypes. here were successful city-women, far from being passive manhood vessels for burberry-sheathed meat-heads,  making a sexual object out of a man. and not a bookish, new age man who whips up a mean risotto and can 'emptathise' and 'listen'. they were ogling a ripped alpha-male who was doing manual labour for them. the type who may struggle to quote nursery rhymes [much less 'sonnets for the portugues'] but who can fix things innit.

New lads had the rug pulled from them as men became object and not the objectifier. and new-men realised that no matter how many deliah smith recipies and chicken soup for the soul self help gurus they brushed up on, they could not complete with raw masculinity. men stopped buying diet coke. i guess it made them feel like drips compared to the Diet Coke Man

.then we have pepsi max and cokr zero, strange adverts. one involved a man resorting to an elaborate set up where he had to convince a woman that an asteroid was about to hit the earth in order for him to get a chance with her - he had to con her into sex. another featured drippy, emasculated men protesting. not just protesting but marching. not just marching, but marching up city streets. the same city streets where the successful and objectifying diet coke women work. a column of maleness marching up an alley of femininity. the semiotics are clear. this was a metaphorical gang-rape of the diet coke women by these drippy non diet coke drinking men.

and what were they protesting for? well men have traditionally marched against oppressive governments, illegal wars and unfair taxation, they have marched for jobs, rights and notions of truth and justice. what do the men in this advert march for?

we want holidays without the packing, yeah... YEAH!

we want bras without the fumbling, yeah.... YEAH!

we want the right to drink sugar free coke without feeling insignificant and castrated, yeah... YEAH

pathetic. dont buy pepsi-max, innit.

lynx is another brand that comes up with adverts that patronise and disturb in equal measure. their adverts feature similarly  pallid men spraying lynx on themselves and then having women flock to them. but what happens to the women when they smell this lynx saturated man? they lose their rationality and become either docile or feral. their humanity dissappears and they cannot resist, cannot deny consent and then fall for a man they would otherwise pass-by. they call it the lynx effect;  they may as well call it Lynx-Rohypnol and be done with it.

also smell is the most ephemeral and evocative of the senses. it can instantly transport you back to a time or place long before you consciously work out what the smell is. it can conjure emotion, recognition and memory. with that in mind why then would you slather yourself in lynx and be instantly associated with every bad 90's lacoste swathed scally going?

pathetic. dont buy lynx, innit.

[RED-DOG]

[Woodsey]

You were OK with the fish jumping those distances?  Or the fact it is clearly a tropical fish, so wouldn't handle the temperature outisde the tank?

Correct. That would be overthinking.

The fundamental concept of the advert is the fish escapes from its bowl to the sea in order to be free. That is necessarily flawed.

Don't watch finding Nemo then, that will tilt the shit out of you, all two hours of it! 

[david3103]

I had a - conservative estimate - five minute rant while at a poker table at the weekend when this advert came up on a nearby telly:



Was it the annoying music? No

Was it the twee comparison between the people driving to be free and the fish doing the same? No. Well, maybe. But no.

How does a fish go from fresh water to fresh water to fresh water to the flipping sea??!

I love adverts. When done well. This, unless there's some fish I don't know about that can do water with or without salt, is not one of those.

I mean why not have them driving to a big lake and the fish swimming about happily there? Easy.

Anyone else?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fish_migration

The featured fish are probably Catadromous, like Salmon. You have heard of salmon? Big fish, often found in tins in  Lidl, or smoked in Waitrose.
Can be really big. I mean really really big, like big as a big 10yr old. 97lb 4oz big.

Yeah, that big.
Hard to miss really.

[Tal]

They only change water type to breed, before returning to their salinated or non-salinated water.

The chap in our advert isn't getting back to his bowl any time soon.

[bobAlike]

Agreed. This advert actually stopped me from using their comparison services.

[BigAdz]

Agreed. This advert actually stopped me from using their comparison services.

Funny for the first few views, I thought, now annoying, like many of the best ones are.

[DungBeetle]

The two ladbrokes adverts have always tilted me into shouting at the tv at them.  I must have seen them combined over 1000 times i reckon.  The first one 'free betttttttttttttttttt!' always made me shout 'layyyyyyyyyyyyyyy a bet you spineless fucks' and the 2nd lolbrokes life advert with the 5 jokers on it just makes me hum the theme tune to the ad.  One of the characters 'Gut Thruster' is the spitting image of Carl Spicer (pro gambler/poker player). 

Haha - the bearded "professor" tilts me.  At least the 10 team aca overhead kick broken shoulder man knows he is punting for a laugh but the professor thinks he can beat the house edge and still get on.