Vegas & The Aftermath - Diary

[tikay]

Anyway, he came up with this idea to save all that time, & driving. Use a helicopter. Yay!

Seemed simple enough, but for 2 things. First, you need take off & landing spots, not as easy as you think. Then you need someone to organise it, sort it all out.

I was that man. I was JNK's sort of super-gofer, if he needed something weird sorting, send for Kendall. And he did not like excuses. If you had a moan, "it's a bit awkward John", he'd simply say, "forget it, I'll get someone who can". Clever sod, him, used psychology SO well.   

I could not find a suitable landing-pad though. JNK was not buying that. As it happened, he owned thousands of acres of land in Derbyshire, usually surrounding his business properties or private estate, to stop anyone buying it & encroaching. He'd rent this land to local farmers (having purchased it off them in the first place) for a peppercorn rent, £1 a year or somesuch. And for £1 a year, he felt he "owned" those farmers.....

And right next door to the Heage of B & K was this farm he owned, with used cow-pasture.

"Why can't we land in the cow-field?" he said.

I told him that I'd already asked the farmer, & he said it would scare the shit of of his cows, can't be doing that.

To which John replied, "that is my land, tell the cows to *** off if they don't like it". 

Yeah, no problem John.....

[tikay]

Anyway, he would not take no for an answer, so I chartered a helicopter. I'm actually shit-scared of the damn things, but no matter, gotta be done.

The helicopter is booked for 6.30am, but we awake to leaden skies & tipping rain.

JNK & me are stood in a muddy cow-field, ruminating cows staring at us, up to our ankles in cow slurry, waiting for this damn helicopter, & I'm also crapping myself.

6.30, 6.45, 7.00, 7.15, still no whirly flying machine. JNK hates lack of punctuality & is chuntering like billyo, & I'm in bum-clench mode as I'm fit to crap myself with helicopter fear.

Eventually, we traipse back to the office, wet through, feet sodden, & miserable. JNK still chuntering away. And my office Answerphone (remember them) has a flashing lighto to signify a message.

It was the helicop people. "Flight cancelled, can't fly in this weather".

JNK went BARMY. My fault, obv.

I took my bollocking like a man, just nodded, said nothing. So he said his usual "and STOP SULKING, take it like a man you big daft bugger".

But he'd almost impercetibly nod his head & wink as he said it. He owned me, abso owned me. Loved him.

Anyway, trip cancelled? No chance. "Fetch the car, & my boxes, let's go". And off we went.

I'm rambling, sorry Adzy, I'll get there eventually. Weird times for me right now, so excuse me. You don't have to read it.

tbc.....

[horseplayer]

Love these Tikay

More please

[Tal]

A former work colleague, when he was asked a question he couldn't answer would go on the most rambly of rambles, covering everything from aardvark to zygote and back twice more, before stopping at a seemingly random point and asking, with an engaging smile:

Does that answer your question?

As you went to say "Not really", he would stop you with a baffled expression, as though it was completely beyond the boundaries of logical comprehension that anyone could be left unsatisfied by the response he'd just given.

Nine times out of ten, all he got back was a resigned "Yes, thank you".

[tikay]

A former work colleague, when he was asked a question he couldn't answer would go on the most rambly of rambles, covering everything from aardvark to zygote and back twice more, before stopping at a seemingly random point and asking, with an engaging smile:

Does that answer your question?

As you went to say "Not really", he would stop you with a baffled expression, as though it was completely beyond the boundaries of logical comprehension that anyone could be left unsatisfied by the response he'd just given.

Nine times out of ten, all he got back was a resigned "Yes, thank you".

Rumbled.

The answer was simple, but it just took me back & got me thinking. I'm a playwright in the Ernie Wise class, don't you know? Context dear boy, context.

Soon we'll get to the Concrete Exhibition, & the somewhat unfortunate postscript to it.

[Tal]

 

[bookiebasher]

Love these Tikay

More please

And hurry up about it.

[Knottikay]

Great stories Tikay. I once had a boss like that....would not take NO for an answer. If he could do it, so could everybody else in his book. He would also give you one hell of a rollicking one moment, then be your mate straight after. I had proper respect for him for it too. Sadly no longer with us but remembered fondly by all who did know him.

[BigAdz]

Wonderful stuff Tony.

Sat with my Boss in hotel in Madrid watching Spain toil in their game and read the tales to the boss who is v keen to watch this interesting character on a poker show when we get back.

Earned yourself a new viewer.


Looking forward to the next installment.

[Junior Senior]

The Bowmer & Kirkland place on Nottingham Road A60 is now a Sainsbury's. Iconic building that when it was a B&K

[sonour]

Hi Tikay,

Is John Kirkland still around and are you still in contact with him ?

Really enjoying your stories.

[JamesHartigan]

Hi tikay,

Long time no speak.

Recently saw 'Locke' on a flight back from the US...and thought of you.

I know you don't watch many films, but I think you'd give this one a big thumbs up. Tom Hardy plays the title character - a construction site manager - who spends a decent percentage of the movie talking about concrete. Not cement. Concrete!

In addition, it's an excellent drama, and well worth checking out. (Apologies if the film's already been mentioned/discussed/reviewed in this thread.)

James.

[celtic]

 (Apologies if the film's already been mentioned/discussed/reviewed in this thread.)

James.

Sick 'I hardly read tikay's diary' brag

[tikay]

Sorry for the delay in finishing that story (can't even remember where I was going with it now....), & in replying to others, (even Hartigan itt), will get caught up shortly & reply to everyone.

Saw the question about the Scottish IndyRef thing & the BBC. Jeez, did you ever see or hear a worse debate? I know one thing, if some bloke, as in the blonde thread, wants to shout & swear at me all day to persuade me to see his side of the debate, gg him, he's got no chance, none at all. You don't win hearts & minds EVER by shouting @ folk & describing them as twats. Surely we learn that as 5 year olds, it's not even O-Level psychology? 

Been a weird few days, did the Show on Tuesday night, then left home @ 4am yesterday to drive up to Leeds. Stopped at Kempton Park M & S @ 4.15am for coffee & Nurofen, only to find I had left home without any cash or plastic, so had to go back home & start over. Lovely job. 

Eventually got back home at 2am this morning, so a long, long, 2 days, & I'm on office & general catch up today.

I also have to get my monthly Bluff article in by Noon tomorrow. They give me the deadline date a month in advance, but I just can't seem to get myself organised to do it early. And now I'm staring, as hard as hard can be, at a blank screen, trying to find some inspiration. Not so much writers block as thinking block.

Had an amazing day yesterday in some ways. The google home page had a special message dedicated to me. Yes it did. It did. It was in that little clickable picture they have some days above the search box. Blew me away. A message to ME, personally, from Mr google. Amazeballs.

Anyway, will get up to date with the replies & try to finish the story shortly-ish.   

[celtic]

Shouting and swearing = cooey wooey in Glasgow 😀