I'm breathless. Have been twitting all day as, for a change, Master has played for longer than two hours in a poker tournament. As I write, he is still in but the HTC desire battery is flatter than the breasts of the transvestite I unfortunately encountered at close quarters in Peppermints last night. Live and learn.
So I have come back to the suite to escape the tension in the Venetian and update on another busy day.
I was not on Twitter duty first thing today. My instructions were clear
"Jeeves, not sure what to write on my Sky Poker (analysis by fish for the pre-teens) blog today. Any ideas?"
I cogitated
"How about the sights and sounds of Vegas sir? Isn't the blog aimed at those who have never been to Vegas? How about a travelogue type post. All Alan Whicker, or Anneka Rice?"
"Good idea Jeeves, a bit less of the Anneka Rice though, Orford is the new Anneka Rice. I like the idea of Alan Whicker though. Or Michael Palin"
He wistfully looked into the distance until the light bulb in his cranium appeared to switch on
"Tell you what Jeeves, while I play you do Vegas. Take the camera, take some photos, bring them back and I will write my blog"
"Yes sir, of course sir."
So, armed with nothing more than the camera, a floppy hat and my espadrilles I set off, determined to take the images that Master would take. Trains, bridges, aqueducts, ducks, Muntjacs, perhaps a lonely heron looking imperious on a yonder pond. Couldn't be too hard to find on the Vegas strip surely?
Several hours later, I was stumped, and back at the Rio. Panicking slightly and fearing my Master's reaction, I got snapping.
This was my first attempt
Room for improvement, perhaps. Or perhaps not
Newly emboldened by my success, and knowing his eyesight wouldn't allow him to notice the smudges, I fortunately turned round just in time to see something
I wasn't quite sure what it was, and needed to find out. I turned to my neighbour, a lady from Oregon, who told me that it was the "Volcano Eruption" at Mirage. Of course it is madam, thanks. Fortunately Master might just be gullible enough to buy it.
I headed back to the suite, uploaded the photos and went down to the card-room.
In the dinner break I followed my Master back to the suite and looked on proudly as he opened the phot file
"JEEVES?!! WHAT THE FUCK ARE THESE?!!"
I was momentarily nonplussed and managed only a stutter
"p-p-p-p-phots sir, like you asked"
"OF A CAR PARK?"
"y-y-y-yes sir. Nice cars. Shiny. large. Oh and a volcano erupting"
"A VOLCANO IN VEGAS?"
His temper was not abating, and I feared my role was soon to come to an end
Silence for several minutes
"Jeeves, I simply don't have the time to do anything about this, I have to file to Mother Hen in twenty minutes. I'll write something up."
The result appeared on his daily blog under an hour later. Ever the Pro, he had resuced the situation, and no one noticed the potential problem.
Snatching the camera back off me, and putting it in the suite safe, I was left in no doubt that further mistakes were unlikely to be tolerated.
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