OK, this took about 30 minutes from start to finish, I've edited it down to 9 minutes, followed by a 3 minute review. I really couldn't cut anything else lol. Something to build on anyway, and a good practice run before the big day. Lots of room for improvement, some things require drastic attention in fact. Oh well, it tasted OK and was funny
What I didn't like.
Alex's cooking technique. He seems to touch his face and run his fingers through his hair a lot. God only knows what he was touching in the bits he edited out.
Eggs: Burned on the bottom, raw on top. You need to baste or flip them to avoid cold or snotty yolk. Aesthetics are also important, your eggs look like an abscess waiting to be lanced.
Sausages / bacon. Did you attempt to grill them? It's supposed to be a fry up for Christ's sake! The clue is in the thread title.
Come to think of it. did you actually cook them at all? I'm willing to bet that the hottest that meat has ever been is 39.5ºC when it was part of a live pig.
Beans. I mean come on. How can you not know how to cook beans? They're already cooked FFS. All you have to do is empty them out of the tin and, Oh wait...
Sausage / bean barrier: Yes, you paid lip service to this, but you used the sausages to separate the beans and the bacon, leaving the eggs totally unprotected. You also chose to compleatly ignored the duck shitting sauce bottle rule.
Portion sizes: One bloke gets half a gallon of beans, another gets a teaspoon full. Try that oop north and tha'll get thee 'ead smashed in.
Obv still plenty to diss but I'm a big believer is stick and carrot, so let's move on to...
What I liked.
The whole concept of attempting something you have obviously never done before 'live' on camera.
Four blokes in a house and no one used swear words to vent frustration, express surprise, or as a replacement for adjectives & nouns. So refreshing.
The pasta bake.
Alex's ability to put his hand on the cooker knobs whilst keeping his head 9ft away from the flame.
Statto's face. He's the only person I've ever seen who deserves to look that smug.
All things considered, 5.7/10
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