Back in November 2005, I quit my office job to take up online poker full time, not quite knowing where my life was going or whether I could survive in what is undoubtedly a tough industry. ‘A Dog’s Life’ was the title of my diary, and perhaps apt here as I have come full circle, back in the same position and wondering whether I’ll be able to cut it without a regular income.
A number of people seem to think I have money coming in from all angles, but that isn’t true. Several weeks ago I was tied in to cover all EPTs for PokerNews and hopefully the subsequent season of EPTs, but suddenly, and out of blue, this was all put into jeopardy by what I would imagine was a combination of backstage politics and budget cuts. A quick email, and thousands worth of income that I thought was cemented in and would act as my safety net simply turned to dust. No Bahamas, no Deauville, maybe not even WSOP! On, off, on, off – it seems to be the nature of being a self-employed journalist in poker. Even as I write, PokerNews are trying to broker a deal to update EPTs in some form, so, after being released by blonde, I can only clasp my hands in prayer and hope that an email comes in saying “We’re 100% going to Copenhagen and want you to work this and all future EPTs,” but nothing seems definite within the current economic climate, and understandably so.
Similarly, cutbacks are being witnessed in the magazine industry. PokerNews has temporarily vanished, Cardplayer cut Floppy’s monthly column and WPT have parted from Future Publishing. I regularly try to get work at magazines, for a commission here and there, but it’s not easy as many are focusing more on ‘name’ players for content or, even worse, doing everything internally. I get the odd reply (Jon Young is a good guy), but most of the time my emails are simply ignored. Even if I do obtain a commission, there’s never a guarantee of when that cheque will arrive, or whether I will have to chase it up in a few months time, over a year, in one case.
So, no, being released from blonde at the moment isn’t the best news I’ve had, but if the finances aren’t there to pay my wages, then there is little I can do but “agree totally” to the decision. I’ve worked my ass off for the company for the last few years, overworked myself on many occasions, yet, three years and three months on, I’m still pretty much in the same position, short-stacked and depending on my suspect online skills to pay the rent. With the online scene being ten times tougher than it was in 2005, I sincerely hope that I miraculously become a good poker player overnight and allow myself to have a life beyond grinding online all day and scraping money for the bills. I have the work ethic to become a good player, but I’m slowly wondering if hard work really is the key to success as I’m 27 now and in seemingly no stronger position than when I left Uni.
I was told on Wednesday that there was a chance I could come back in six months time if the company was fairing better, but I’m not sure that is going to happen. If I am desperate for money, then obviously I will have no choice but to accept, but do I want to return to be the ‘dead weight’ of the company again? What’s the point in me returning to send the company back into survival mode and doing a job that management sees as not directly bringing revenue to the company? If I were to return, I would want to see some financial assistance in the areas that I was working, otherwise I would simply be back to tread water and bring down the combined income for everyone else. I’m not sure I really want to play that role, and there’s a sense of pride involved that remains important to me.
Tikay said that the homepage was “excellent”. I’m sure he was just trying to be nice in a time of woe, but this is incorrect beyond belief. I’ve done everything I can with the main site, but poor design both aesthetically and technically as well as a severe lack of IT support (the WSOP link in the menu still goes to the wrong year), outside contribution and SEO have made it an impossibility to drive sufficient traffic towards the site, never mind make it a section deemed “excellent”. I still believe today that with an injection of funds (sadly not available), I could add all those features and ideas I have in mind, pay for outside contributions for articles, blogs, strategy tips, and so on and make the homepage a place that people want to visit. But, it’s simply not a one man job, especially when I live update too, and without money, I can only do so much. When I starting doing the results, there were around five card rooms involved, now there are God knows how many. I could have accrued more, but I had to draw the line somewhere and wonder why I would create more and more work for myself for no financial benefit. It made no sense, and as such, I found myself unable to take the main site any further.
One of my biggest errors was creating blondepedia. I consumed months of my life trawling through every page of every update looking to download every photo blonde had ever taken and then inputting them into a database that I designed. Add 500 bios, 3,000 entry/player thumbnails, images from all the updates, liaising with our IT department, checking mistakes, etc, etc and you have the most arduous, lengthy task imaginable. And for what? Well, nothing really. I initially considered taking my idea elsewhere and trying to sell it, but my loyalty lay with blonde, and I whole-heartedly wanted to increase the value of the company and give people a feature they might not find elsewhere. Sadly, a lack of money again meant no additional features could be added to the database, and it has thus remained the same as it did two years ago, despite what I consider to be endless possibilities. I have never been paid anything for blondepedia (I never asked or expected), it was all voluntary, and now I feel like I invested too much time when I could have applied myself better in other ways, and perhaps to more financial gain. Of course, it’s completely my own fault.
What I can take out of my time with blonde, however, is enjoyment. I may have disagreed with some of the decisions made and directions taken, but I still enjoyed my three years with the company. At a time when I was stuck indoors grinding out a living, blonde opened a window and gave me the opportunity to do something more proactive. Without blonde, I probably wouldn’t be working for PokerNews or anyone else for that matter, so for that I am grateful. Updating may be hard work, but it can be fun, and being out and about, at the very centre of the game and meeting the people who make it all tick is certainly something I wouldn’t want to trade.
I’d like to wish tikay, Kev and TightEnd the very best of luck with blonde. I sincerely hope that they can make a success out of a company that has been a very important part of my life. 30,000 plus posts should suggest how much I like this place, and it will continue to gut me that I am no longer such an active member in its maintenance, but I have accepted the decision made, hopefully gracefully and with a little dignity. As for everyone else, many thanks to those who helped me with Natwest, my back problems or whatever complaint/moan I have made. I am very grateful for the free help that was given and I very much look forward to seeing a number of you at the upcoming APAT event.
Finishing on a light note, Floppy sent me a message saying “bet you a fiver it’s me who goes” prior to Wednesday’s ‘meeting’ in Luton and I replied in similar vain. Seeing as it was a double KO, we’ve both remained even (we didn’t bother exchanging fivers), but I feel as though I’ve had the last laugh. I was meant to go to my parents’ house today (Friday) in Birmingham, but I shrewdly came up two days earlier to ensure that my journey to Luton was on route to another destination. It costs £20 in petrol to and from Luton, and I was determined not to pay to get the boot!
Over and out.
Snoops
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