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Claw75
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« Reply #330 on: September 03, 2010, 09:23:24 AM » |
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according to my little black book it's deffo eng/ire/sco. insignificant sample size tho.
Wow, you have your black book in order of nationality? continents, sub-divided into nationality and cities |
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"Arguing with idiots is like playing chess with a pigeon....no matter how good you are the bird is going to shit on the board and strut around like it won anyway"
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boldie
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« Reply #331 on: September 03, 2010, 09:49:13 AM » |
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I was eating my tea last night when I suddenly thought to myself,
"This milk must be seriously out of date."
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Give a man a gun and he can rob a bank, give a man a bank and he can rob the world.
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boldie
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« Reply #332 on: September 03, 2010, 09:53:33 AM » |
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I have decided to write all my jokes in capitals from now on.
This one was written in Edinburgh.
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Give a man a gun and he can rob a bank, give a man a bank and he can rob the world.
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Claw75
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« Reply #333 on: September 03, 2010, 10:28:24 AM » |
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I was eating my tea last night when I suddenly thought to myself,
"This milk must be seriously out of date."
I really tried not to giggle..... |
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"Arguing with idiots is like playing chess with a pigeon....no matter how good you are the bird is going to shit on the board and strut around like it won anyway"
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bobAlike
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« Reply #334 on: September 05, 2010, 05:26:24 PM » |
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There's something I need to tell you but it's really hard to say...
...Ken Dodd's Dad's dog's dead.
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Ah! The element of surprise
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boldie
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« Reply #335 on: September 06, 2010, 01:03:00 PM » |
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I love that new BUPA advert
"One day Mary felt a bump... It was cancer.
The doctor put her in a nice room and she felt better"
She still had cancer though.
They don't tell you that.
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Give a man a gun and he can rob a bank, give a man a bank and he can rob the world.
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RED-DOG
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« Reply #336 on: September 06, 2010, 01:36:07 PM » |
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I love that new BUPA advert
"One day Mary felt a bump... It was cancer.
The doctor put her in a nice room and she felt better"
She still had cancer though.
They don't tell you that.
Er, it's Emma actually. And you're making brown cow in Scottish field assumptions. So there. |
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The older I get, the better I was.
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sovietsong
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« Reply #337 on: September 06, 2010, 10:56:29 PM » |
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I love that new BUPA advert
"One day Mary felt a bump... It was cancer.
The doctor put her in a nice room and she felt better"
She still had cancer though.
They don't tell you that.
wheres the joke? |
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In the category of Funniest Poster I nominate sovietsong. - mantis 21/12/2012
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mondatoo
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« Reply #338 on: September 06, 2010, 11:21:15 PM » |
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I love that new BUPA advert
"One day Mary felt a bump... It was cancer.
The doctor put her in a nice room and she felt better"
She still had cancer though.
They don't tell you that.
wheres the joke? Haha wp |
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boldie
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« Reply #339 on: September 08, 2010, 08:07:59 AM » |
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News: 'Boy George's reptile bites 5 people in one day.'
He needs a calmer chameleon
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Give a man a gun and he can rob a bank, give a man a bank and he can rob the world.
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Laxie
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« Reply #340 on: September 08, 2010, 08:29:59 AM » |
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News: 'Boy George's reptile bites 5 people in one day.'
He needs a calmer chameleon
Is it wrong that the groan was followed up by a giggle? |
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I bet when Hugh Hefner dies, you won't hear anyone say, "He's in a better place."
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lazaroonie
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« Reply #341 on: September 08, 2010, 11:52:08 AM » |
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guy in bed with his missus. getting a bit frisky and he tells her he wants a 'chilean miner'
'what the fk is a chilean miner? she asks
'well, work your way down to the bottom of the shaft, and dont come back up til christmas'
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MANTIS01
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« Reply #342 on: September 08, 2010, 05:22:41 PM » |
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I'm thoroughly hacked off with people constantly knocking on my door asking for charitable donations. Last night a woman came round collecting for the local sperm bank. I gave her a right mouthful.
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Tikay - "He has a proven track record in business, he is articulate, intelligent, & presents his cases well"
Claw75 - "Mantis is not only a blonde legend he's also very easy on the eye"
Outragous76 - "a really nice certainly intelligent guy"
taximan007 & Girgy85 & Celtic & Laxie - <3 Mantis
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boldie
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« Reply #343 on: September 09, 2010, 11:11:35 AM » |
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In a protest against radical vegetarians, on September 11th I will be burning some Quorn.
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Give a man a gun and he can rob a bank, give a man a bank and he can rob the world.
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boldie
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« Reply #344 on: September 09, 2010, 11:31:03 AM » |
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I cant believe it! I was going to get up and fly the plane...
But I was still stuck to my fucking seat
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Give a man a gun and he can rob a bank, give a man a bank and he can rob the world.
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