Joke!!

[Robert HM]

Oh boldie how could you!

[coolhand lew]

i bought a giant bottle of tip-ex yesterday ------- BIG MISTAKE !!!!!!!!

[coolhand lew]

why was the avon lady chuffed ---- cause max factor !!!!!!!

[coolhand lew]

a toilets been stolen from our local police station------ police have nothing to go on !!!!!!!!!!

[pokerfan]

According to researchers (in the Sport),vegetarians' sperm tastes better than anyone else's.I nearly choked on my MUNGBEAN SALAD when I read that!

[pokerfan]

I love wine so much,I often get a Semìllon.

[Waz1892]

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Latvian, a Turk, an Aussie, a Yank, an Egyptian, a Jap, a Mexican, a Spaniard, a Greek, a Russian, an Estonian, a German, an Italian, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Swede, a Finn, an Israeli, a Romanian, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Czech, and a Swiss man walk into a pub.

The landlord says, "I can't let you in without a Thai."

Laughed out very loud!!

[Graham C]

Dubai have banned the Flintstones cartoon, apprently they don't get the humour, but it's ok because Abu Dhabi Do

[sweet potata!]

So apparently Snoop Dogg is carrying a brolly with him these days ...fo drizzle.

[Girgy85]

I went to a fancy dress party last night as a loaf of bread.

The fucking birds were all over me!

[RED-DOG]

1st Circumlocutionist: I have in my possession an animal belonging to
                       the family Canidae, and it appears that he does
                       not possess any extra-facial olfactory organs.

2nd Circumlocutionist: Could you therefore impart to me, such
                       knowledge as may be necessary, to describe how
                       that animal circumvents the problem of
                       satisfying his olfactory senses?

1st Circumlocutionist: Unfortunately, the non-ambiguity of your
                       enquiry does not easily permit me to provide a
                       clever answer, but I am in fact thinking of
                       referring the animal to an olfactologist.
                       However, the animal does have a fairly
                       unpleasant body odour, should you be
                       interested.

[moonandback]

I went to a fancy dress party last night as a loaf of bread.

The fucking birds were all over me!

aaah but did you get a duck?

[RED-DOG]

Q. What's pink and hard?
A. A pig with a flick knife.

[RED-DOG]

Q. What has 4 legs and 1 arm?
A. A happy pit bull.

[boldie]

1st Circumlocutionist: I have in my possession an animal belonging to
                       the family Canidae, and it appears that he does
                       not possess any extra-facial olfactory organs.

2nd Circumlocutionist: Could you therefore impart to me, such
                       knowledge as may be necessary, to describe how
                       that animal circumvents the problem of
                       satisfying his olfactory senses?

1st Circumlocutionist: Unfortunately, the non-ambiguity of your
                       enquiry does not easily permit me to provide a
                       clever answer, but I am in fact thinking of
                       referring the animal to an olfactologist.
                       However, the animal does have a fairly
                       unpleasant body odour, should you be
                       interested.

Oh dear, I actually sniggered at that.