china mug on china mug by china mug for china mug courtsy of china mug...a diary

[china mug]

our man starts to get a run of bad form every bet he makes is baised on absulute faith and impeccable analisation off all revaliant infomation but every bet is comeing in just outside the money,its midday and hes 350 quid down,the warden has put a ticket on his screen which he had watched happen whielst staying in the bookies but he had rationalised that the guy looked like a missrable git and probley would not give him the chance to move his van also if he has a ticket he can stay parked there as long as he wants so realy its like a parking fee....the wineoo has been in and out two more times getting gradualy worse for wear thru drink and louder on his crusade to educate every one on whats wrong with people ....the staff behind the counter have changed shift and now there is a spotty faced twenty year old goth girl complete with a abundance of bangles lip pierciengs and lots of little coloured cotton bands around her wriest each one denoting a special friend she has swopped her colours with she is also reading some jeffrey archer fiction novel and giveing our man a almost grimace of ..what you again ,you are makeing me put my book to one side again,why dont you hurry up and loose all your money so i can get back to the real world in my exciting novel,so unlike the first cashier hours ago who had  clearly spotted he was a man of devastating vision and had uttered pleseant niceties as he had took his winnings .as people enter the bookies he hears snide comments about the van with a ticket and someone must be ..haveing it away in here to have not been able to shift it...the onley consolation is that mr china man is clearley beset by the same streak of bad luck as the pile of crumpled up looseing slips attest.our man has tacken the batterey out of his phone as he was getting calls all the time from his misses ,not that he was ansering .but now he will be able to claim his phone was playing up and he had to dash to help a mate of his who had a flooded house to deal with and he got the call then his phone must have played up...and he had asked his mate to get his office to phone his  home to say he would be a little bit late but they had obliviosley failed to do that simple task....what absolute bastards ,,when they need help o yes call on me ,but given one simple task  to do and they cant even get that right....well i wont be helping them out again in a hurry can tell you.
our man is also aware that he will have to intercept the parking ticket before his misses who douse all his accounts sees it,....but for now all he wants to do is get his original money back and get the hell out of here.

tbc

[taximan007]

I just love this thread

[china mug]

our man is now betting in 50 pound bets he just wants to get his money back up to a grand and he can tell the mrs that the customer didnt pay it all up but has promised the rest later in the week,the wineoo has come back into the bookies and gone asleep in the corner by the raidiator the smell of urine can be detected mixed with salt and vinager crisps aftershave ,mr china man has been suffering and has started to lower his bet sizes,our man decides this is the actions of a losser ,his run of bad luck is bound to change any mineute how stupid would it be to drop his bets down to say a fiver and then hit form .
the builders come back  in from ealier in the day one of them has hit a treble and all the talk is about getting home getting changed and going out for a good drink and a visit to the indian after wards well almost all the talk is about that there is mention made of there being three parking tickets on the transit outside apparently the wardens can give a ticket every other hour on the bay outside.
the wineoo has woken up and looks at mr china man then decides to leave him alone and trys ponceing some drink money of our man,our man looks to the manager behind the counter who looks the other way finding that he has to tidy some papers ,our man gets a non commental glance from mr china gent and decides the easest action is to give the wineoo a hand full of change ,a happy winaoo exits one more time for the pub.
all the regulars have left the bookies our man is down to his last twenty all he wants to do is to double up as his mrs knows he had forty when he left home this morning so he has to have at least that when he sees her.......the wineoo returns onley now he sits on one of the three metal stools betwean our man and mr china gent ,theres onley one race left to run in the bookies some late start caused by bad weather down in norfolk .
so our man has his last twenty on a even shot on the last race out of the back of nowhere and there off....his nag is doing ok .... half way there still ok....
just a short distance thurther still doing ok ....but wait another horse is threatening to over take our mans horse ..its our mans horse    then this other nag    then our mans nag     as they come up to the last 50 yards     our man is on the edge of his seat it all hindges on this bet ....he will lie to the mrs  work week ends with his mate to make the money up ,lie about the customer delaying payment, lie about where hes been all afternoon ......just let me win this one time o lord he murmurs.........then it happens
he hears a murmur from mr wineoo as almost like a drunken ballereana he slips of his stool his legs fail to hold him up and he douse a half pirioete as he in almost slow motion slumps to the ground hitting his head on our mans metal stool legs,...our man is glued to the tv screen ...its his nag...then the other one ...then his nag,,,,he can hear the wineoo groaning at his feet but he cant take his eyes of the screen ....he can see out of the corner of his eye goth bitch gesteureing in his direction still with jefferey in her grasp ....if he looks down he knows what will happen ,so long as he holds the faith it will all turn out ok ...out of his perriferal vision he sees a pool of red liquid spreading from mr wineoo head and moveing towards his feet ...the race is neck and neck.... he cant look down ...but the blood will be all over his shoes any secound he has to look down to see where to re locate his feet to to avoid the mess........like some french noble man awaiting a pardon as the blade of madame guileteen comes whistling down to kiss the back of his neck ...our man looks down
and then for the first time in seven hours he hears mr china gent speak....thats all you fucking need ,he says.


not tbc

[millidonk]

Great read. Got caught laughing to this at work. Sigh. But worth it. Hope i don't have a parking ticket when i get out. Parked on dub yells.

[bhoywonder]

Bloody cliffhanger.....sigh...

[china mug]

been a bit busy lately,new job and all that jazz,whent to a paint ball works outing good fun apart from the goggles misting up all the time,   the cource where you revisit your child hood playing cow boys and indians is divided into themed zones, egyptian tomb area, delta force area ,etc...... some of the areas where called viet cong village....london bus......
it made me wonder how many years will have to pass before they have ....dunblaine...hungerford.....londonderry......and any of the schools where some gun totting plab has played god.....
bang bang another red indian falls backwards of his horse and gets dragged along by his foot caught in his straps amid clouds of dust.

[china mug]

noy wishing to be meloncoly ...however a group of about six lady birds decided to hibernate in a tight little group top right hand corner of my bathroom door archritrave,they took up there position as the cold weather started to drop the tempreture last november first one lady bird then another,aaahh thets cute there huddling together for warmpth shareing,  then another one and another cullminating in the gang of six,o shit is this the equivalent of those whales all committing suacide by swimming ashore...as the weeks whent by i would sit on the lavey and feel nothing but kind thoughts towards me tight nit group of sitting tennants .some times wondering if they were actualey dead and just stuck there by some goo on there legs...but no ...commeth the warmer weather there is movement ...one of them has legged it over to the other side of the door frame...o good they are alive...then another one had moved a few days latter aaahhh isnt nature great....

then one morning i came into the bathroom and there was a ladybird on the shower curtain,flick into bath down plug hole with water thats emptying ..how quickley we forget
am i a bad person

[WPIL]

I simply dont understand

[WPIL]

Someone limping with AK
I shove A6 in BB
I lose

[WPIL]

why limp with AK

[china mug]

i saw a thought provoking sight the other day,i was driveing along the redbourn road from st albans i had gone pass the prey house that dose a realy cheap carvery under 4 pounds and was heading towards redbourn ,up ahead was...and for that matter still is a pub i think called 24/7 a gay pub ,i remember a gay chap telling me he whent there on one of there busy event nights and a ever so nice huge black doorman let him in and assured if he didnt find anyone special he would volanteer to take him home and give him a good fisting,i think its a game gays play a bit like scissors ,paper,stone.......any way the thought provoking thing was as i drove up the road a pheasant dashed out from the verge well ahead of me ,my first thoughts were how grand a bird so ellagant ...i think they were bought over by the romans.....but then i see as it dashes across the road a car is bearing down on it and i straight away will the pheasant to miss the car wheels and make it to the safty of the far verge.......then i see the car is a hearse complete with coffin  and i straight away think o how awful it would be for the people in the hearse and the following ontrearge of following mourners cars taking there loved one to his final resting place to smack the poor pheasant with there car ,flattening the poor bird and showeing the road way with feathers........
luckley the pheasant made it to the verge safley.....the thought provoking part of it was how quickley my thoughts whent from....o the poor bird ....to o how upsetting for the mourners if they hit the bird ....relagating the birds life to a incovineance......

[china mug]

sunday morning woke up....allways a good start
scratched arse and had  ablutions in bathroom...onley place realey ,kitchen sink too small and a bit cold and overlooked  by neigbours

[WPIL]

why doesn't you post count go up?

[TightEnd]

The forum software enhancements recently detect those posting purely to get post count up ahead of posting on the staking boards, and freeze posts until the individual's posts add some value, and aren't just gobbeldy-gook.

[WPIL]

I normally post valid posts in PHA or Sports (NFL, College, SWFC) etc but in this thread I find I can only post Gobbeldie Gook
Sorry