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Author Topic: china mug on china mug by china mug for china mug courtsy of china mug...a diary  (Read 144384 times)
china mug
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« Reply #450 on: September 10, 2018, 10:12:22 PM »

ooppps i forgot to mention glavana ,so a short while ago i was at luton g and who sits down beside me but the old rocker of poker, tats and all he with the face of a thousand orgies fresh out of his gimp mask on his trade mark glass of red wine we chat mostly about this one and that one of the old gang of retrobates with a special mention from glavana about the one that always used to flounce out of the poker room with a sigh when he got knocked out early , which was pretty often i knew who he meant as the old blondite he was on about had been in a few days earlier mentioning in passing that he hadnt sold his mustang yet to any one that was within ear shot ....obvious case of penile defisioncy being made up by high ticket purchase ... now at this time i had a free drink ticket that i had got of uncle fester for making a straight flush ...sick realy if it was a royal flush i might have got a bag of crisps as well but hey ho a freebie is a freebie..so liking old glavana i offered to buy him his next wine with it which he was happy to have ...you dont have to waste time with him asking if he would like another its a given ...
so next time hes at luton g and orders a pizza he can expect me to hover by his elbow looking for payback.....

GLAVANA WHAT IS HE GOOD FOR ,SEE IF YOU CAN SAY YES TO 4 OF THE ITEMS BELOW

1/DOING A SPEECH AT YOUR WEDDING.
2/RELYING ON HIM TO PICK UP A POSSE OF GIRLS AT A VEGAS POKER EVENT AND BRINGING THEM BACK TO YOUR HOTEL FOR A PARTY.
3/BEING ABLE TO TELL YOU FROM EXPERIENCE WHAT CREAM TO PUT ON  WHICH EMBARRASSING RASH.
4/WHEN USING YOUR LAP TOP TRUSTING HIM TO NOT LOOK UP YOUR SEARCH HISTORY.
5/BEING ABLE TO NOT LAUGH WHEN HE STARTS EVERY FIFTH SENTENCE WITH THE WORD WELL.

IF YOU ARE ABLE TO TICK YES TO 4 OF THE 5 ITEMS ABOVE CLEARLY YOU HOLD HIM IN HIGH REGARD AND HAVE A DEEP AND LONG UNDERSTANDING OF HIS HUMANITY WITH ALL ITS HIGH STANDARDS AND LOFTY BEST WISHES FOR HIS FELLOW MAN AND CONSIDER YOURSELF  FLAVOURED THAT YOU HAVE HAD THE GOOD FOURTUNE TO HAVE BEEN IN HIS PRESENCE AND TO HAVE KNOWN HIM EVEN IF IN ONLY SOME SMALL WAY .................or of cource you might think hes a twat and you are setting him up for the mother of all slow rolls.

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china mug
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« Reply #451 on: October 02, 2018, 11:20:56 AM »

SO HERE WE GO LINING UP FOR THE BIG WEEK AT LUTON G TRYING DESPERATLEY TO WIN A 1000 TICKET NO LUCK SO FAR STILL THERE IS A 10 TICKET GT EVENT COMING UP THAT SHOULD BE THE KING OF ALL SHOVE FESTS ...MUST SAY LIKE A OLD DRUGGIE IM GETTING A TASTE FOR THE VIC DEEP STACK A BETTER CLASS OF POKER MISFITS SPEWING OF THERE CHIPS THAN WHAT YOU GET IN THE SHIRES

HEY HOW WHAT WAS IT EINSTEIN SAID ABOUT THE PROOF OF MADNESS SOME THING ABOUT DOING THE SAME OLD ACTIONS AND EXPECTING A DIFFERENT OUT COME , OR WAS IT GET YOUR TITS OUT MISS MONROE , I KNOW IT WAS ONE OF THEM ..
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nirvana
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« Reply #452 on: October 02, 2018, 12:29:49 PM »

ooppps i forgot to mention glavana ,so a short while ago i was at luton g and who sits down beside me but the old rocker of poker, tats and all he with the face of a thousand orgies fresh out of his gimp mask on his trade mark glass of red wine we chat mostly about this one and that one of the old gang of retrobates with a special mention from glavana about the one that always used to flounce out of the poker room with a sigh when he got knocked out early , which was pretty often i knew who he meant as the old blondite he was on about had been in a few days earlier mentioning in passing that he hadnt sold his mustang yet to any one that was within ear shot ....obvious case of penile defisioncy being made up by high ticket purchase ... now at this time i had a free drink ticket that i had got of uncle fester for making a straight flush ...sick realy if it was a royal flush i might have got a bag of crisps as well but hey ho a freebie is a freebie..so liking old glavana i offered to buy him his next wine with it which he was happy to have ...you dont have to waste time with him asking if he would like another its a given ...
so next time hes at luton g and orders a pizza he can expect me to hover by his elbow looking for payback.....

GLAVANA WHAT IS HE GOOD FOR ,SEE IF YOU CAN SAY YES TO 4 OF THE ITEMS BELOW

1/DOING A SPEECH AT YOUR WEDDING.
2/RELYING ON HIM TO PICK UP A POSSE OF GIRLS AT A VEGAS POKER EVENT AND BRINGING THEM BACK TO YOUR HOTEL FOR A PARTY.
3/BEING ABLE TO TELL YOU FROM EXPERIENCE WHAT CREAM TO PUT ON  WHICH EMBARRASSING RASH.
4/WHEN USING YOUR LAP TOP TRUSTING HIM TO NOT LOOK UP YOUR SEARCH HISTORY.
5/BEING ABLE TO NOT LAUGH WHEN HE STARTS EVERY FIFTH SENTENCE WITH THE WORD WELL.

IF YOU ARE ABLE TO TICK YES TO 4 OF THE 5 ITEMS ABOVE CLEARLY YOU HOLD HIM IN HIGH REGARD AND HAVE A DEEP AND LONG UNDERSTANDING OF HIS HUMANITY WITH ALL ITS HIGH STANDARDS AND LOFTY BEST WISHES FOR HIS FELLOW MAN AND CONSIDER YOURSELF  FLAVOURED THAT YOU HAVE HAD THE GOOD FOURTUNE TO HAVE BEEN IN HIS PRESENCE AND TO HAVE KNOWN HIM EVEN IF IN ONLY SOME SMALL WAY .................or of cource you might think hes a twat and you are setting him up for the mother of all slow rolls.



Haha. Missed this excellent homage. Thanks Tom
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nirvana
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« Reply #453 on: October 02, 2018, 12:30:53 PM »

SO HERE WE GO LINING UP FOR THE BIG WEEK AT LUTON G TRYING DESPERATLEY TO WIN A 1000 TICKET NO LUCK SO FAR STILL THERE IS A 10 TICKET GT EVENT COMING UP THAT SHOULD BE THE KING OF ALL SHOVE FESTS ...MUST SAY LIKE A OLD DRUGGIE IM GETTING A TASTE FOR THE VIC DEEP STACK A BETTER CLASS OF POKER MISFITS SPEWING OF THERE CHIPS THAN WHAT YOU GET IN THE SHIRES

HEY HOW WHAT WAS IT EINSTEIN SAID ABOUT THE PROOF OF MADNESS SOME THING ABOUT DOING THE SAME OLD ACTIONS AND EXPECTING A DIFFERENT OUT COME , OR WAS IT GET YOUR TITS OUT MISS MONROE , I KNOW IT WAS ONE OF THEM ..


Good luck in the quest for the golden ticket
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china mug
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« Reply #454 on: October 04, 2018, 12:27:01 PM »

Wow who is this glevana guy no sooner has he twerped his inclination that he would like me to get a ticket for the big one and it comes true at luton g last night ,i managed to creep under the wire and grab a willy wonka gold bar wrap....nice ....i shall have to reward glavana with a suitable reward when i next see him not the weinstein holywood reward for struggling actresses thou as i would have concern for poor old glavanas knees on the hard floor ....im thinking more along the lines of a glass of his favourite blood transfusion cordial.......o and if he could use his super powers to wish me luck with the ladies...or just one of them...and to win the big one all the better.
so this saturday i can pratt about in the 10 seat gt event as the pressure is of and we are looking for a reserve ticket /credit   ...nice...mmmmmmm

SO CUT TO THE SCENE ON ..RED OCTOBER..AND SEAN CONNERY IS GIVING THE SPEECH TO THE CREW ABOUT HOW ONCE AGAIN WE LIKE OUR FATHERS BEFORE US AND THERE FATHERS BEFORE THEM ARE ENGAGED IN PLAYING THE GREAT GAME WITH THERE OLD ADVERSITY  .....then back to me a candle in the wind of ready to set the barn ablaze or flutter out at the first butterfly wing beat from brazil who knows which will happen.....BUTTERFLYS A ENDANGERED SPECISE MY LEFT BOLLOCK IM HERE TO BURN THE BARN DOWN AND HAVE TOASTIE BUTTERFLY WINGS ON TOST ,brown healthy bread of cource.

cut to scene of load of gospel singers in full regalla singing o happy days as i win the gukpt .....mmmmmmm did i just see that foxy young one at the back flash me a special smile .....
and back in the room....

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nirvana
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« Reply #455 on: October 04, 2018, 07:33:27 PM »

excellent, well played - will pop in to collect my reward at some point before Xmas
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china mug
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« Reply #456 on: October 05, 2018, 11:38:39 AM »

hi glavana just to confirm that some ramblings on a lap top do not constitute a legal contract to supply goods at a guaranteed price or no price as in free......so lush on my old son .....but dig in your own pocket first also i have to protect my self from  the semblances that it appears like we are a couple of old lags looking to swop spit in the showers ,you would have the tap end at bath time of cource...

JUST FINISHED POSTING ON THE   BARRED FROM CASINO PAGE    AND THERES A STORY I FEEL LIKE SHARING WITH ANY THAT WANT TO READ IT ..

As a young man say 20 years of age i was walking down from my local town centre in st albans probley in a happy mood as it was my habit to have 6 to 8 pints of bear then head for the chinese take away then home...as i passed some shops on my left i see a wine shop that some one has thrown a heavy object thru creating a perfect hole the size of a dinner plate with the surrounding glass broken into wedges with sharp edges on seeing this i also see that within easy reaching distance of the hole all the bottles of wine that had been stacked on display had gone leaving the hard to reach ones just needing a bit more determination to reach......my first reaction having taken in this information in my happy mood was to reach in and help my self to some freebies ....happy days what a bonus,forget the fact that i dont drink wine and will just give it away to look big...then a voice in my head....yes i do hear voices...said hang on a minute that glass looks dangerious i looked up and the piece above where i would have to reach in was fluttering in the breeze and was about 2 metres square in area only a triangler shape hovering above the whole where my first thought was to shove my arm thru and grab a freebie which would disturb the shire of glass to plummet down onto my arm , not to my liking i now decide stuff the wine thats bloody dangerious and maybe i should find some thing to knock the glass down to prevent the next person losing a limb ,not being able to see anything i decide to jog on as the saying goes ,all of this has tacken say 4 miniutes then my spider man instincts cut in and for no reason i turn and look across the road to a door way where i see two police officers watching me .....i wont go into the rights or wrongs of the police using a entrapment which could cripple or kill some one ...i look at them them at me then i turn and walk on.

the point i am trying to make is that any one can see a quick grab oppertunity for percived gain and its only if our inner voices have a balancing meckanism that rationalises and comes up with the thought thru cource of action that ones own moral code of right or wrong signs of on at that moment....
had a thumping great lump of glass not been in danger of cutting my arm off would i have nicked the wine and got nicked or would i have said no to my primal instinct on moral grounds.....
i dont know but al least even in a intoxicated state my self presavation instints /moral code allowed me to body swerve that one.....with spider man instincts like that how can i not win the gukpt big one....
five tickets tonite i wonder who will get the other four....
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china mug
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« Reply #457 on: October 06, 2018, 02:56:05 PM »

played the five ticket for the big one event last night at luton g ....a hand that i have never seen before happened....blinds 800/1600 i limp with 88 kevin in seat two on my left makes it 3200ish next player makes it 7500ish next player all in 20000ish big blind all in 50000ish up to me wtf         pair of eights cant be winning       i think about calling alla kamikazie style    but just cant do it i pass    kevin the original raiser all in with aces the other three hands are kings queens and jacks      so we have players taking photos and i belive its on the luton g twitter page     the flop 8 rag rag turn rag giving pair jacks a straight last card 8 quads for me had i gone kamikaze mode      pair jacks with a straight wins as douse aces the rest........is this the poker pixies and fairies telling me to not get cocky just because i got a ticket for the big one i still have to do the hard work and ball breaking.....
satalite with 10 seats gt tonite ........what could possible go right.
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china mug
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« Reply #458 on: October 08, 2018, 10:59:03 AM »

O HAPPY DAYS whent to luton g last night sunday for the 200 plus 25 event ...what are they doing with all these 25s not laying on a free buffett thats for sure ...how about you have a happy table luton g where you pick one table and all the players can have a free drink or meal of the bar menu up to 6 pounds...just saying like ...whodnt want you to lose out to down the road....
any way got there and found alla she of the poka dot wardrobe the wet fetish dream team of one that that i had a ticket from a lps that i had forgotten ....mmmm nice .....the ticket that is......
had to have a rebuy....not so bloody nice ...matters not that i had the other players strangled and they river the out that they have to hit ....when you fall of a mountain wheather its at 1oo metres or 1000 metres you are still jam sandwich.....eerrrr not nice still rebought and got thru to secound day......sort of nice ....    mmmm nice ....but with a  eeerrrr ...still got thru price so far 23400 probley double that when the fish finish swarming up river tomorrow monday    say price pool 40/45k  first say 12/14k   or as i call it toms new land rover discovery with raised wheels that some one else has done all the work on....gree in colour i think....
resting tonite london pride in a pub i know is 2.50ish a pint on mondays ....mmmmmgnice.....
then play tuesday win try to look wise as as soon as you win one of these events people think you are a superiere being and hang on to your every word a bit longer as if mineing for gold nuggetts that they can adhere to......shouldnt take them more than two days to relise this seam has washed out decades ago....then wed for a sata lite    then the big one thurs .....probly split the money when we are 5 handed with me having the larger share as i will be chip leader .....mmmmm nice .
had a naughty thought while in one of the breaks so i asked one of the male staff in the card room to put out a call in the card room as my car was blocked in by another car parking too close and i cant get in to my drivers side ...but luckley i know the name of the owner of the other car as it is mr will that talks a lot ....he was compliant and would have probley got on the tanoy to ask mr .......to please report to card room or to move his car , but the polka dot rockviller heard and blocked that one ......later when we where putting our chips in the bags i saw her with the bags and pens and enquired if the bag lady was here yet.....she flashed me a special look and adjusted her glasses she wasnt wearing ......bring back dina .....soon
mmmmmmm
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china mug
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« Reply #459 on: October 12, 2018, 10:24:59 AM »

SO HERE WE ARE ITS 9.36AM FRIDAY THE 12/10/18....GETTING MORE LIKE A BIG BROTHER TIME LINE ANNOUNCEMENT ...THE BIG GUKPT EVENT IS ON AT ONE PM AND I WAS LUCKY TO WIN A SAT TICKET TO IT I THEN PLAYED OTHER SATS BUT GOT BITCH SLAPPED OUT OF THEM ALL
until that is two days ago its a sat with 5 seats for the big one gt and all the hungry and greedy are there it cost 150 plus 15 juice to enter,i mentioned to she of the polka dot wardrobe top that it seems like the club is taking juice twice as there are charging 15 for the comp to win tickets that have 110 juice in them ....she wasnt having it and recited history that all clubs do it and its correct ect...so i get busted out of the comp and have to re buy not the way i envisaged the master plan working mmmmmm then we are into the no reentrey stage and im busted out  rrrrrrr grind teath and head for door pass kebab girl who cheekly chirps up ...o tom are you off ...she likes me realy as do i her.
so out into the club and theres a roulette wheel with 7 and 18 being the last spin numbers ,now i dont belive in playing this folly but any port in a storm i put 5 on 7/11 and 5 on 28/29  it comes in 29 making 90 with bet i lay the lot out with 50 on 29 plus splits of 5 and 10 on 7/11 with 5 on 7 ....it comes 8 i repeat bet ,10 i repeat bet ,32 i repeat bet, 10 i repeat bet .....im chuckling with the girl spinning the wheel as its quiet somthing to be able to hit 5 numbers in a row ,also theres a business man doing 125 a spin darting between two tables and he can see that im getting a lot of action for my initial 10 bet .....you know whats coming dont you .....wheel spins ball goese round and round and plops into 29 ...i treat my self and the club to a gutteral yeeaaah ,will have to practise this as it just made me look like a football thug but all the peaple within a 5 table radius got the message ,now what to do next i take the bet down the girl spins the wheel pit boss and girl are poised if i throw some of my 2160 winnings at them and bark instructions as to this that and neighbours ,i see mr business man is watching also .....i pick up my winnings and walk into the cardroom as the wheel spins on ,i can see later if it repeated for now im a winner .....kebeb girl sees me putting my winnings into a chip tray and i give her a blow by blow account of what i did and this spin number then that spin number....shes happy for me as she used to be a poker player herself,also asks me if i want any cash game i decline then take my tray of winnings and sit in the compertition seat i had left 20 mins ago kebab girl calls non players away from the table but she knows im going to have the crack first ....the players at the table can see tha cash chips ,who busted me out i say i did replies the guy thats reking in a pot he has just won    thank you i say 10 at roulette into over 2k ,any time he says .....it made me sound a bit crass but i just wanted to share my inner yipppeeee yaahhhaaaa with fellow players variouse night all night toms and im of cash up two 1k wraps and change happy tom walking pass bar i see polka dot girl and blonde manager chatting in bar i pass a few words which they humour then goodnight and home,next morning wake big smile and day of rest friday in prep for today.

SO THERE WE HAVE IT ALL THE GRINDING AND HEART ACHE OF PLAYING A SATALITE TO TRY AND WIN SOME CREDIT FOR MY POKER SEATS IN THE FUTURE NO LUCK THEN I FALL INTO A HOLE WITH 2160 UPTO MY ARM PITS ....IM I TO TAKE THIS AS DIVINE INTERVENTION THAT MAYBE JUST MAYBE THIS TIME THE PLANETS ARE ALLINED AND ALL IS WELL IN THE UNIVERSE AND ITS TOMS TURN TO PLAY MR BIG BOLLOCKS ..no not a bit of it if i go deep in the gukpt it will be because i do all the hard work and dont get unlucky the party poppers and high fives can follow on later.
GOT TO SEE IF ANY ONE HAS A SPARE TICKET TO SELL AT A KNOCKED DOWN PRICE MMMM NICE. 
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StuartHopkin
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« Reply #460 on: October 12, 2018, 10:36:48 AM »

Good luck today!
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« Reply #461 on: October 12, 2018, 10:48:32 AM »

Good luck today Thomas.
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« Reply #462 on: October 12, 2018, 03:40:43 PM »

Best of luck.
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« Reply #463 on: November 06, 2018, 05:23:48 PM »

Good news or bad news?  You decide.

China Mug has had problems with his PC and seems to have lost or forgotten his login / password.   He's tried the lost password facility on this site, but it doesn't appear to have worked for him.

If any Blonde Poker site administrator sees this and would like to help Tom, could they arrange for a new password to be emailed to him please.     

OTHERWISE THIS DIARY WILL CEASE.  WE WOULDN'T WANT THAT WOULD WE?
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« Reply #464 on: November 06, 2018, 05:31:29 PM »

Good news or bad news?  You decide.

China Mug has had problems with his PC and seems to have lost or forgotten his login / password.   He's tried the lost password facility on this site, but it doesn't appear to have worked for him.

If any Blonde Poker site administrator sees this and would like to help Tom, could they arrange for a new password to be emailed to him please.     

OTHERWISE THIS DIARY WILL CEASE.  WE WOULDN'T WANT THAT WOULD WE?

Hi Alan,

I have asked the more tech-minded Mods to try & sort this out.
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