Coca-Cola or Pepsi? COKE
Scarface or The Godfather? GODFATHER
half full / half empty HALF FULL
Saturday or Sunday? SATURDAY
Stockings or tights. STOCKINGS
spring or autumn SPRING
Indian or Chinese ? CHINESE
Bath or Shower SHOWER
Totalatarianism or Democracy DEMOCRACT
Roundhead or Cavalier ROUNDHEAD
La-La or Po LALA (likes to sing and dance)
Diesel or Unleaded UNLEADED
J,J or A10 JJ
Bus it or Walk it WALK IT
BBC news 24 or Skynews BBCNEWS24
Daniel Negraneau or Howard Lederer NEGRANEAU
Blonde or brunette BRUNETTE
Buffy / Cordellia CORDELLIA
Raul / Fernando Torres RAUL
washing up or drying up WASHING UP
red / blue RED
Snoopy or Scooby Doo SNOOPY
limit or no-limit NO LIMIT
whole nut / fruit and nut WHOLENUT
ice cream or ice lolly ICE CREAM
Pacino or De Niro? PACINO (narrowly)
Del Boy or Rodney DELBOY
STT or MTT STT ONLINE MTT LIVE
Eyes or smile? SMILE
Bungle or Zippy ZIPPY (mental)
Kiera Knightley or Natalie Portman? KIERA KNIGHTLY (but both too skinny)
Hero or sidekick HERO
Apple or Pear APPLE
chocolate or vanilla CHOCOLATE
Real ale or Lager LAGER
Gerrard or Lampard? GERARD
Scottish or Welsh WELSH (hate us less)
french or german FRENCH (if I must)
Personality or looks? LOOKS
The truth or complete bollox? THE TRUTH
Easyjet or ryanair DONT CARE
Tent ot caravan CARAVAN
swings / roundabouts SWINGS
Freezeout or Rebuy? FREEZEOUT
hendon or Blonde BLONDE
Tea or Coffee TEA
Sugar or Sweetex? SUGAR
Peanut Butter or Jelly? JELLY
laptop or desktop DESKTOP
Steak or BJ? BJ (duh)
WSOP or WPT WSOP
Satalite or supertsatalite SUPERSAT
Bond or Bauer? HUH
analogue or digital DIGITAL
deal or no deal NO DEAL
Breasts or legs? (I'm talking KFC of course!) BREAST
Stop 'n Go or All-in over the top STOP AND GO
dot cotton or pat butcher VOMITTED DOWN MYSELF
bacon or sasauge BACON
comedy or drama? COMEDY
Victor Meldrew or Basil Fawlty? BASIL FAWLTY (there is too much butter on...those...treys

classic)
fried egg sandwich or bacon sandwich BACON
Knight Rider or Airwolf? KNIGHTRIDER
Batman or Spiderman SPIDEY
comics or cartoons CATOONS
MSN or SMS MSN
PS3 or XBOX 360 PS3
Laddies or VC LADDIES
Sparticus or Maximus? SPARTICUS
Dominos or Pizza Hut? PIZZA HUT
Simpsons or Futurama FUTURAMA
Life of Brian or Holy Grail LIFE OF BRIAN
Specs or contacts SPECS
Retro or Nouveau NOUVEAU
Iranu or Uvavu? UVAVU
Cheryl Tweedy or Charlotte Church? CHURCH
Little or Large LARGE
Felicity Kendall or Michaela Strachan STRACHAN
City of Gold or The 3 Muskahounds HUH
Pat Sharpe or Timmy Mallet? HUH
The future or the past? FUTURE
Kylie Manogue's Bum or J-Lo's breasts J-LOS BREASTS (cos you can still see her ass from round the front

)
Boy or Girl GIRL
Beach or Sightseeing BEACH (pool bar for preferance)
X-Ray specs or next weeks Lotto numbers XRAY SPECS
Ungar or Chan? CHAN
1/2 packet of cigarettes or full tank of gas FULL TANK
Sausages - Beef or Pork BEEF
spit or swallow SWALLOW (if she loves me)
estate agent or jehovah's witness JEHOVAS WITNESS (meaning to invite one in and convert them to atheism one time)
Beardsley or Le Tissier? LE TISSIER
Tottenham or Arsenal TOTTENHAM (I suppose)
Fever Pitch or Pride and Prejudice FEVERPITCH
Shakespeare or Tarentino? SHAKESPEAR
Salt and Vinegar or Ready Salted? SALT N VINAGER
Sun or Snow? SUN
Sofa and DVD or Party Animal? SOFA AND DVD THESE DAYS
Sushi or Fish and Chips? FISH N CHIPS
Blues or Jazz BLUES
Wine-o or lager lout? LAGER LOUT (though I enjoy a drop)
Cat or Dog CAT
Babies or Teenagers TEENAGERS (though I couldn’t eat a whole one)
beagles or alsatians? ALSATIANS
Mcdonalds or Burger King McDONALDS
Ferrari or Lambourgini FERRARI (F40 PLEASE)
buriel or cremation CREMATION
Holdem or Omaha HOLDEM
AK or 2,2 AK
Barny Boatman Or Ross Boatman BARNEY
King Kong or Godzilla? KING KONG
Party or Pokerstars POKERSTARS
Stella or Corona? STELLA
Sampras or Agassi SAMPRAS
Old people or Young people YOUNG PEOPLE
Bruce or Jackie BRUCE (easy)
Ultimate Warrior or Hulk Hogan ULTIMATE WARRIOR
Monkey or The Water Margin? MONKEY
Top Gun or Days of Thunder TOP GUN
Goodfellas or The Godfather GODFATHER
Weekend at Bernies or Deuce Bigalow DEUCE BIGALOW
Sidious or Yoda? YODA
Dr Who Or Blakes Seven? DR WHO
Notre Dame or Michigan State WHO CARES
Dungeons and Dragons or He-Man HE MAN
Tyson or Bruno TYSON
Gas or Electric GAS (pardon me)
Night or Day NIGHT
Insomniac or cant get up INSOMNIAC
Ecstacy or LSD NEITHER
Cant get it up or cant get it down CANT GET IT DOWN
Ministry of Sound or Cream CREAM (with eric clapton)
Dirty limper or over raiser? DIRTY LIMPER
jammy dodgers or custard creams JAMMY DODGERS
Gandalf or Dumbledore POMPUS OVERACTED CRAP
$1,000,000 or €1,000,000 €€€
Going out last or going out on bubble ON THE BUBBLE
Birmingham or Manchester MANCHESTER
Old or New NEW
Width or Lenght (Ladies?) LENGTH (but I don”t like to brag)
John Wayne or Clint Eastwood JOHN WAYNE
Sweet or sour? SWEET
Phil Ivey or Phil Hellmuth IVEY
Woods or Faldo WOODS
Little Britain or Harry Hill Saturday supplement LITTLE BRITAIN
Maths or English Lessons? ENGLISH
Cold Turkey or Hot Chicken HOT CHICKEN
Poker player or pimp daddy POKER PLAYER
Christmas Eve or New Years Eve? CHRISTMAS EVE
Friends or Cheers CHEERS
Courtney Cox or Jennifer Aniston JENNIFER ANISTON
Hasslehoff or Peter Andre HASSLEHOFF
Pass the sherbert or pass the ducthie DUCTHIE
Round the Twist or Knightmare?? HUH
Pretty face or "chin down"? HUH
Snooker or Pool POOL
Two word story or this or that? THIS AND THAT
Jermaine Defoe or Peter Crouch...DEFOE
MTT or Cash? MTT
Milton Keynes or Luton MILTON KEYNE (mk bowl)
Chocolate or Crisps CRISPS
Paper or Plastic? PAPER
Smileys or Fancy Text? SMILEYS
AK or 77? AK
Blonde Bash or Vegas? BLONDE BASH
lager or bitter? LAGER
drunk or sober? SOBER
Rugby League or Rugby Union EGG CHASERS BOOO
cincins or broadway BROADWAY
Family Guy or Futurama? FAMILY GUY
The Breakfast Club or Stand By Me? BREAKFAST CLUB
Michael Mann or Martin Scorcese? SCORCESE
Magic Johnson or Michael Jordan JORDAN
Ali or Louis? ALI
Pull a sicky or go to work SICKY
Nokia or Motorola MOTOROLA
Dangermouse or Count Duckula DANGERMOUSE
olive oil or mini mouse MINI MOUSE
cannon or ball? CAN I JUST HAVE A RIFLE
Kebab or Burger KEBAB
ferguson or muhrinho? FERGIE
Cheddar or Stilton CHEDDAR
Rare or Well Done RARE
Alan Green or John Motson? MOTTY
Belgian or Swiss? SWISS
Love or Lust ? LUST (making love< that’s what the missus does while I’m f****

her)
safe or unsafe? SAFE
Smoked Haddock or Unsmoked Bacon BACON
Rampant Rabbit or Sedated Gerbil HUH
Curbishley or Allardyce BIG SAM
Beards or Moustaches BEARDS
Hannibal or Murdoch ? MURDOCJH
B.A or Face BA
Sharks or dolphins SHARKS
Roswell or JFK JFK
Sex or Poker SEX (although im a rock at both)
Ghost Towns or Most Haunted WHATEVER
Rock or Hip-Hop ROCK
Salad Cream or Mayonnaise MAYO
Captain James T Kirk or Captain Jean Luc Picard? PICARD
beckham or a brazilian? BECKHAM
beer or whisky BEER
summer or winter SUMMER
cheesen onion or salt n vinegar? SALT N VINAGER
Shoes or Trainers TRAINERS
Merc or BMW MERC
sink or swim? SINK
Crunchy Nut or Ricicles CRUNCHY NUT
Tesco or Sainsbury's ? TESCO
Original or Old Favourite ? ORIGINAL
Sky or cable? SKY
Letter or Email ? EMAIL
Heads and Shoulders, Knees and Toes or One Finger One Thumb? HEADS SHOULDERS
British Bulldog or Kiss Chase ? KISS CHASE
Johnny Cash or Elvis Presley ELVIS
Red or Blue Rizla ? RED
Tikay or J kay? TIKAY
Amsterdam or Prague ? AMSTERDAM
Ironside or Ironside? (ours or Raymond Burr) IRONSIDE
Giving presents or recieving presents? GIVING
chips or mash? CHIPS
Homer Simpson or Ned flanders HOMER
Oh Brother where art thou or Homers Odysusy OH BROTHER
sun or the moon? SUN
South Park or Seinfeld? SOUTHPARK
Bungee Jump or Parachute Jump? PARACHUTE
tight end or wide receiver? WIDE RECIEVER
East Coast or West Coast WEST
east 17 or heaven 17 RATHER CUT MY EARS OFF
Yahoo Chess or Gameknot? YAHOO
Earl or Baron? HUH
Slipknot or Korn SLIPKNOT
Saddam or Osama? SADDAM
Chieftain or Challenger NO IDEA
Bush Snr or Bush Jnr WHERES THAT RIFLE I ASKED FOR
The French or The German FRENCH
Rocks or Socks? ROCKS
Ghosts or UFOs NIETHER BEHAVE
collars or cuffs HUH
Rangers or Celtic PFT
Smilies or Polls SMILIES
limewire or kazza KAZZA (paid off my AA)
Hannibal Lecter or Jack the Ripper? HANNIBAL
Freddy or Jason FREDDY
beef or salmon BEEF
Maradona or Pele MARADONNA
Cruyff or Best? BEST
Tomato or Tomayto (phonetically) TOMATO
Semi skinned or full fat FULL FAT
Pretty woman or Officer and a Gentleman POKE MY EYES OUT PLEASE
Jack Daniels or Southern Comfort. JACK
Jessica Alba or Natalie Portman ALBA
Tiger or Lion TIGER
Comfortably Numb or Wish You Were Here HUH
The Wall or Dark Side of The Moon? THE WALL
Rio or sol? RIO
Chelsea or Man U MAN U
House or Appartment HOUSE
Mike Reilly or Steve Bennet? HUH
Milk or Cream? MILK
Kangaroos or Koalas KANGAROOS
Trapping or betting TRAPPING
Inny or Outtie (belly buttons of course!) INNY
Sun bed or Spanish sun? SPANISH SUN
Lake or Loch LAKE
Oasis or Strokes BOTH SHITE
Hoodie or Sunglasses SUNGLASSES
NFL or MLB NFL
QPR First team or QPR reserves? ;DUNNO;
Shetland Isles or Channel Islands ;DUNNO;
natural blonde or bottle blonde?? BOTTLE
Eng BB2 Team or Scot BB2 Team ENG
36C or 44DD 36C
Six Million Dollar Man or The Man From Uncle? SIX MILLION DOLLAR
Cardplayer or Poker Europa? POKER EUROPA
Mega Mac or Double Whopper? WHOPPER
Tony Soprano or Uncle Junior TONY SOPRANO
Lost or Six Feet Under? LOST (never watched the other)
They think it's all over or Have I got news for you? HAVE I GOT NEWS
Peter Cook or Dudley Moore? DUDLEY MOORE
Testosterone or Oestrogen? TESTOSTERONE
Hearns or Hagler? HEARNS
Henry or Ronaldinho? RONALDINHO
Bramble or Boumsong? BRAMBLE
crumble or cake? CAKE
Greaves or Hurst? GREAVES
Rounders or Lock Stock & two smoking barrels LOCK STOCK
Freddie Flintoff or Ian Botham BOTHAM
Beef or Lamb BEEF
BMW M6 OR BMW M5 NO IDEA
Crab Legs or Lobster Claws NO, IT’S JUST THE WAY I WALK
mexican or italian MEXICAN
barbados or bognor BARBADOS
Regis or Christie CHRISTIE
Package or Letter PACKAGE
french or saunders SAUNDERS
Camembert or English Stilton NO THANKS
Morse or Poirot? NO THANKS
Kerplunk or Mousetrap KERPLUNK
friend or foe? FRIEND
red or white wine RED
bidup tv or pricedrop tv NO
Blond Tikay or Blonde Paris Hilton NIETHER ARE MY TYPE BUT PARIS HAS THE RIGHT BITS
Brian Lara or Sachin Tendulkar LARA
Coco Pops or Choco Pops? COCO
Gucci or Prada NAH
H&M or M&S NAH
sea air or mountain air SEA
Piercings or Tattoos TATTOOS
chess or backgammon CHESS
Aliens or Predators PREDATORS
pizza or Kebab PIZZA
Cheese strings or cheese triangles TRIANGLES
Pub or club PUB
Live Music or Pool HMM LIVE MUSIC
Bill Bailey or Eddie Izzard BILL BAILEY
Klingons or Romulans BLAH BLAH BLAH
Paris Hilton or Chantelle CHANTELLE (delightfuly simple)
Burger or Hot Dog BURGER
Marmite or Bovril MARMITE
Urine or Faeces URINE FAECES (can”t beat a good hang over poo)
pasta or rice RICE
villa or blues? NAH
Brian Wilson poker player or Brian Wilson Beach Boy? POKER
california girls or highland lassies CALIFORNIA
Lennon or McCartney BOTH OVERATED
john or yoko? WHERE’S THAT RIFLE
old or new testament DEVOUT ATHIEST SO OLD IS THE MORE INTERESTING FICTION
wordcup or olympic games? WORLD CUP (86 SLEEPS IS IT?)
Brown sauce or red? BROWN (any man who takes red when brown is an option should be ashamed)
Manual or Automatic MANUAL
Quad bike / Scrambler QUAD
eggs or bacon? BACON
Conservative or Labour LABOUR
left or right (handed) RIGHT
Their place or yours THEIRS
Nike or Adidas NIKE
monarchy or republic REPUBLIC (come the revolution I have a list, WHERE’S THE GUN)
thomas the tank or ivor the engine THOMAS
Orange Juice or Apple Juice ORANGE
On top or underneath ON TOP
Cookies or Cake CAKE
dairy milk or galaxy GALAXY
Sklanksy or Harrington HARRINGTON
One bottle or two into the shower? ONE
t'internet or live LIVE LIVE LIVE
Ladbrokes or William Hill LADDIES
Strawberry or Rasberry STRAWBERRY
Hillwalking or a Kebab? KEBAB
Giver or Receiver ? GIVER (though I keep a count)
whips or chains CHAINS
Real Madrid or Barcelona REAL MADRID
Back door or front FRONT (my gates a bugger to get in from the side passage)
Chocolate Milkshake or Strawberry Milkshake CHOCOLATE
MOH or Unreal tourny UNREAL TOURNEY
Slap or Tickle SLAP (just enough to get a wobble mind)
Pies or Pizza PIZZA
Volvo or Saab VOVLO
mustard or horseradish MUSTARD
razz or A-5 triple draw DRAW
Doyle Brunson or Todd Brunson DOYLE
Walkers Crisps or Kettle chips WALKERS
smokey bacon or beef and onion BEEF N ONION
Kill Phil or Kill Bill KILL PHIL (PLEASE)
benji or lassie (you have a shotgun) LASSIE, (THERE’S THE GUN)
Bugatti Veyron £5million to make 1000BHP 280MPH or a Mclaren Mercedes McLAREN
Gala Notts or Broadway BROADWAY
Subaru Impreza or Mitsubishi Evo VIII SUBARU
blu tac or prit stik BLU TAK
Catapult or Air Gun CATAPULT
put up shelves or spend the day online ONLINE
Ironing or Hoovering IRONING
Ben and Jerry's or Hagen Dass? HAGEN DAAS
Belgium or France FRANCE
black or white (chess) BLACK
MJ or Madge? HUH
starsky or hutch THE DARK HAIRED ONE (starsky?)
Omaha Hi Lo or Hi Lo Silver Lining OMAHA
lone ranger or tonto TONTO
Tom Cruise or Keanu Reeves CRUISE
superman or lex luthor SUPERMAN
Bruce wayne or Batman BATMAN
Stadler or Waldorf WHATS IN A STRADLER SALAD?
Hilton or Hyatt HYATT
paris or nicole NICOLE WHO
Big flirt or sweet and innocent? BIG FLIRT
Leg or Breast BREAST
16 or 26 (years of age ) 26
AA UTG or KK on the button KK
98 suited or A10 off 98
Kems or Copags KEM
youth and emthusiasm or age and cynisism AGE AND CYNISISM