Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary

[RED-DOG]

355yd par 4.

If someone was to slice a drive so badly that the ball ended up on an entirely different course, then still make par, would they become a legend?

[RED-DOG]

I do my best to either avoid, reject or otherwise bamboozle cookies and algorithms. That doesn't mean that Google won't still try to offer me stuff that it thinks I'm interested in, it just means that I get some pretty eclectic suggestions.

Google is currently convinced that I'm fascinated by anything to do with farts or farting. This morning's offering was a compilation video of people recorded by those Ring doorbell cameras letting off outrageously long and loud rip-snorters on the front doorstep while waiting for the door to be answered.

TBH it was pretty hilarious, especially the semi-squatters and the leg-lifters. Best of all were those who rang the bell first and then farted afterwards, only for the door to open mid parp.

[RED-DOG]

For those of you that live with females, are there products in your bathroom that you are told in no uncertain terms are not for you to use?

I don't know how they can tell if you have used them, but they can. Perhaps the bottle is slightly lighter, facing the wrong way on the shelf, or its use leaves a tell-tail scent in the air.. What ever it is, THEY KNOW.

I got a bollocking the other day for, and I quote, "Using £16 of shampoo and conditioner on those few scruffy tufts you call hair".

I was then directed to the £1.99, 2lr bottle of combined shampoo, conditioner, shower gel, mouthwash and deodorant. "Here! This is your own personal one, especially for you". 

Because I'm worth it.

[Kev B]

355yd par 4.

If someone was slice a drive so badly that the ball ended up on an entirely different course, then still make par, would they become a legend?

Let me know how you did. 🤣

[doubleup]

I think the sliced drive would have to have been out of bounds, for a par to raise eyebrows.

[RED-DOG]

It was further from the hole after the drive.

[Rod Paradise]

It was further from the hole after the drive.

  You're nearly the type of golfer I loved in Bermuda as a kid Red. I lived near the green on the dogleg 2nd of the St George's Holiday Inn course. There were always golf balls to be found in the wood the dogleg went round.

BUT when we (Dad & I) were short of golf balls we went elsewhere... to the highly exclusive Castle Harbour course. My dad would give me a shake about an hour before dawn, 'we're going for golf balls'. I'd throw on a pair of trunks, and a pair of shorts, grab something (hopefully cake) out the fridge and we'd be away in the car.

Click to see full-size image.

Before dawn we'd drive down the rough to the sea beside this hole, and be into the water just as it was getting light enough to see the brand new (this being where I reckon you wouldn't have been my favourite;) ) golf balls the yanks would hook off the hilltop tee into the drink. We'd dive for them, the only worrying part being the fact that Castle Harbour was the route for the sharks that had been scavenging rubbish in the harbour overnight to head out to sea. As a scrawny 8 year old seeing sharks bigger than you cruise by was a bit disconcerting. On alerting Dad he said 'They're full, they don't want a skinny thing like you!'.

A bucket of balls filled we'd be off, stopping for a breakfast on the way home.

Excuse the ramble, you just sparked a memory of the old fella.

[RED-DOG]

Hi Rod, so nice to hear from you. Great photo.

It's lovely to remember times spent with your old man isn't it? Keep remembering and keep telling the stories.

What are you up to these days? Do you consider yourself an old fogey yet?

[RED-DOG]

Talk about money in sport, have a guess how much a 30 second advert during the superbowl costs?

6.45 million dollars 

[doubleup]

And the event is designed to have as many advert breaks as possible. As far as I can ascertain from viewing worldwide streams, the US and the UK (non-terrestrial) are the only countries that indulge in this saturation advertising. Skysports racing is virtually unwatchable due to the bombardment of mostly depressing, and constantly repeated, adverts from bookies, funeral providers and life insurers. The golf on sky can be very bad at times also. 

[RED-DOG]

I hate those adverts where relatively young, apparently healthy couples talk with smiling enthusiasm about having arranged their funaral.

[RED-DOG]

You pay for Sky Sports, Then pay again for Pay per View, then they have the cheek to screen endless adverts.

[Rod Paradise]

Hi Rod, so nice to hear from you. Great photo.

It's lovely to remember times spent with your old man isn't it? Keep remembering and keep telling the stories.

What are you up to these days? Do you consider yourself an old fogey yet?

Definitely in the old fart territory, a few of my schoolmates are grandparents and I'm being invited to other mates' kids weddings.

Growing old disgracefully though, still up for a mosh pit & going to as many concerts and football matches as I can fit in.

My middle niece is in the Ireland team for the Euro Taekwondo Championships in Sarajevo in April, so that'll be another trip to a new country/city. Last year it was Lublin in Poland, a beautiful small city that I loved.

[Rod Paradise]

You pay for Sky Sports, Then pay again for Pay per View, then they have the cheek to screen endless adverts.

You pay for Sky Sports? *cough*dodgybox*cough*

[doubleup]

I watch the golf on sky sports germany if the stream is solid - one brief advert break every 20-30 mins. It is exactly the same coverage as used by sky uk and they simply show the pictures and one commentator talks. I sometimes watch the spanish coverage which has one break an hour.